How do I use labeling and meditation while being focused in the real life?
Usually our meditation focus or our anchor that we choose is the breath,
Right?
Our mind wanders,
We bring it back.
Our mind wanders,
We bring it back to the breath.
We choose the breath when we're practicing meditation because it is always available and it is ever-changing.
It's there.
It's a good gauge of our inner state.
If it's fast and shallow,
That suggests something about our disposition.
We're a bit anxious,
We're a bit edgy.
If it's long and slow and deep,
We are calm.
It is an automatic response that we can impact through slowing it down or speeding it up.
But it's always there,
Subtle and available.
So we focus on the breath on the meditation mat.
Just like in the gym,
You might lift weights,
Right?
We lift weights in the gym that are unlike weights in real life.
You know,
I do say a deadlift.
In real life,
We're rarely doing the lifts that you would do in the gym.
But the act of doing the lifts in the gym transfer into real life strength.
So in real life with meditation,
What we're doing here is in the same way in the gym we're practicing strength building,
For example,
We're practicing mindful awareness.
We're doing something.
And every time we practice mindfulness,
Our mindfulness skills go up.
And you'll notice,
You'll just get better at noticing you're like,
Oh man,
I really got angry then.
You'll just notice that your mind has gone down a path you weren't intending.
Let's say you're at work,
Or with your family,
Or doing a hobby.
You'll be doing it.
And then all of a sudden you'll realize you're distracted.
You picked up your phone,
You're scrolling,
You're down a rabbit hole that you didn't mean to go down.
You're agitated for some reason.
You'll notice it.
And then you'll be able to bring your focus back to whatever it is you're doing.
So like,
There's a few ways that you can use this in real life.
But the broad focus,
The way that it benefits us from a layman's perspective,
There's answers that will be sort of given down the sort of monk approach to meditation.
I'm not really interested in that because it's not applicable to my life and most everyone's lives.
There is a practical real world benefit to meditation,
Particularly mindfulness meditation.
It helps with emotional regulation.
Usually our emotions are relatively stable.
They go up,
They go down,
But they're sort of within a functional and acceptable and appropriate bounds.
We get a little bit stressed,
A little bit calm,
A little bit happy,
A little bit sad,
But it's in that range.
When our emotions go off and out of that range,
Too high or too low,
It can lead to overwhelm and dysfunction.
But mindfulness will help us capture that.
It's like,
Whoa,
I'm getting really stressed.
You capture it before it turns into a panic attack.
Ooh,
I'm getting really excited over here.
You capture it before you make a fool of yourself,
Right?
I'm not saying that it's bad to fall into those emotions.
I work as a poet,
Deep expression,
But there's an appropriate time and place for that.
And I want to make that choice as opposed to falling into it.
So mindfulness helps us to see where we are,
Step back and go,
Okay,
I am not my thoughts,
Feelings,
Emotions,
Sensations,
Whatever.
I'm the thing having them.
I'm witnessing them.
So in real life,
We develop those skills and we bring ourselves back to the moment.
And you can also do this almost in reverse.
It's like,
Let's say you're cleaning the dishes.
You could choose to do it mindlessly,
Mindlessly washing the dishes,
Just getting through it,
Headphones in,
Listening to music or a podcast or whatever.
Or you could choose to do that activity mindfully,
Being there in one mind.
I'm washing the dishes.
I'm feeling the sensations of my hands.
I'm feeling the warmth.
I'm fully present.
Same thing with eating and showering and traveling and almost everything.
You might find that by paying more attention,
What was mundane or overwhelming or annoying,
Maybe as a work job,
Actually becomes somewhat enjoyable because you're fully there.
This moment,
I am here now.
So it's a multifaceted approach.
You practice meditation on the mat,
Take a good good at meditation or mindfulness off the mat.
You can also practice mindfulness rather than focusing on the breath.
Like I said,
With the dishes,
With the vacuuming,
With all the chores and all of that sort of stuff,
Gardening,
Rather than doing other stuff in your mind and being,
You focus on where you are and what you're doing.
Your mind wanders,
You bring it back.
Your mind wanders,
You bring it back.
And that will lead to a significant increase in just positive feelings about your life,
General satisfaction because you're here living it.
I am here now.
