Hello and welcome back to Unleash Your Peace.
My name is Ali Shoja.
I am your host.
I'm a positive mindset coach,
A personal transformation expert.
I'm a deliberate creator and I am your peace trainer.
And this podcast over here,
Unleash Your Peace,
Is your peace training.
Every single week we dive into a different aspect of the internal world.
We do that over the course of five episodes published Monday through Friday.
Now the episodes are super short and sweet.
They're about 10 minutes each.
That way it's not a huge time commitment on your part,
But you have something uplifting,
Inspiring,
Thought provoking,
First thing in the morning to listen to,
To get you to look inward.
That's where your peace resides.
That's where your joy resides.
That's where your creativity is.
And when you live from that place of joy and peace and connectedness to that non-physical part of you,
That infinite beingness of you that holds all of your potential,
You don't just incrementally improve the quality of your life.
You actually exponentially innovate every aspect of your experiences on this physical plane.
You become whole.
You become a powerful creator.
You shed all of this unwanted pain.
You tap into lasting internal peace.
You live your best life and best of all,
You inspire everybody around yourself to do the same thing.
And that is exactly what my wish is for you.
And that's my wish for everybody,
Quite frankly,
On this planet,
Because that's how we are going to level up as a society,
As a human race.
Now we are on week 15.
We've completed 14 weeks together,
A lot of really fun topics that we have dove into.
And this week I am introducing something that is absolutely brand new.
It's a theory that I developed a few years ago talking to a friend of mine.
I hope it'll come across over this podcast.
I hope you'll like it.
It's one that I haven't shared with a lot of people,
But it has made a big difference for me.
And in that conversation that I came up with this with my friend,
It made a big impact on her as well.
So I'm hoping it'll resonate with you.
And the theory that I've come up with is called the range theory.
Now let me give you a little bit of a history.
Let's go back to that conversation that created this theory in the first place.
I was sitting with a friend of mine,
A good friend of mine,
And she has been very hesitant to shine.
Essentially,
She's been hiding herself,
Her true self.
She's probably,
I would say,
One of the most powerful people that I know.
The amount of just incredible innate power that this person,
This individual has is palpable.
You feel it when you are in her presence.
But at the same time,
She's one of the most timid people that I know.
She really shies away from being in the spotlight,
From speaking up,
Even her voice is almost a little bit mousy.
It's very quiet.
And the very first time I met her was at a meditation retreat.
It was a 10 day of a passion of meditation retreat.
And I just looked at her and I said,
Why are you in hiding?
And fast forward a few years of friendship and I'm sitting at her kitchen table and we're having a continuation of that same dialogue,
Of that same initial conversation.
And for me,
It had always been very confusing why she would hide her light so much.
And she told me a story about when she was very young and she was being bullied.
And I won't go into the details of it,
But the long and short of it was that she responded to the bullying in such an extreme way that put one of the kids in the hospital.
And since that day,
She has been terrified of that fire that is within her.
Now,
This person works with small children.
She is the most gentle and loving individual that I know.
She's a meditator.
She does three month long meditation retreats.
She studies with a Lama.
She has all these spiritual teachers that she works with.
So she is extremely connected and introspective and yet she has a fear of this darkness that might be inside of her.
And in this conversation,
I just started smiling and she said,
What is it,
Ellie?
Why are you smiling?
And I said,
You are afraid of your range.
And that word range just kind of happened.
It just came in that conversation and it just suddenly made so much sense to me why she was the way she was.
Essentially,
If you think about,
For example,
Mariah Carey,
I know we're shifting gears into music now,
But I promise you it will make sense by the end of this episode.
But take Mariah Carey,
How vast is her range,
Her singing range?
She can hit notes that are so high,
But it's beautiful.
And then she can hit notes that are so low.
So her range is incredibly large.
What that means is she can be in dialogue,
Musically speaking,
With anybody at all and she can have a really good time.
But if she's going super high or super low or somewhere in the middle,
When you compare her to someone who has a smaller range,
Musically,
We're just talking about this as a metaphor,
But when you talk to someone who has a shorter,
Smaller range,
They have fun within their range,
But when they go beyond it,
It's extremely uncomfortable and they can't hit those notes that Mariah Carey can hit.
So they don't have personal experience or the ability to hit those notes within themselves.
Now how does that range translate into our individual lives?
What I said to my friend was this.
Now after I gave her the Mariah Carey example,
I said,
You have within you this incredible range where when you are put in a position of being victimized,
You can act in such an extreme way that puts somebody in the hospital.
On the other side,
You can take a three-year-old autistic child and hold them by your chest and soothe them for an hour.
So you have the capacity for extreme violence and extreme gentleness within you.
And how incredible is that range to be able to understand both of those behaviors within one individual?
Now I want to be a little bit careful with this because I'm not actually saying,
You know,
Go out and be violent.
I'm not saying that at all.
But what I am saying is that she has the capacity within herself to understand that behavior.
What that means is that she has the capacity to recognize what is needed,
What is the pain point,
What causes that kind of behavior in somebody else.
Because our range ultimately allows us to connect with ourselves and also with other people.
If we can see ourselves in others and we can connect with that,
We can experience empathy and we can expand through that experience of empathy.
A larger range actually makes us better members of society because we can connect with a larger group of people on a deeper level.
Now extending your range happens through acceptance.
If you are denying a part of yourself,
You're limiting your range.
As you're saying,
That is not part of me.
And therefore you are going to suffer because that is a part of you.
Anytime you are separating yourself from a piece of what you are,
You are going to create suffering within yourself.
You're going to create dissonance within yourself.
So essentially to extend your range,
Acceptance is absolutely paramount.
And for acceptance to happen,
We need to have compassion and we need to see the innocence in that.
We don't have to become an advocate for those actions that fall on the far edges of our range,
But we can get to the point where we understand them,
We have compassion for them,
And we accept them as part of our capacity.
And when we do that,
We're not actually saying anything negative about what and who we are.
A lot of people have fear about accepting their full range because they feel like that's going to make them a bad person.
They have a lot of shame or guilt around their capacity to do certain things.
And just because it is within your range,
It doesn't mean that you're going to do those things.
But what it does mean is that when you see that in the world,
When you see that action taking place in the world,
You are not going to be so judgmental.
You are going to have the capacity to experience empathy and compassion.
And that is ultimately what's going to help heal this planet and this world and the people in it.
Now,
A lot of food for thought with that.
I would love to hear your thoughts about this range theory.
And it is actually something that has helped me quite a bit over the last few years.
And it's helped me find acceptance of myself.
And also I've used it to help other people find acceptance of themselves and of those around them.
And it is,
I find something that really helps create connectedness and heal the separation within us and within people.
So I'm very excited to dive into this with you.
Now I do have an announcement to make in this episode as well,
Which is that on November 14th and 15th,
I am hosting a free webinar on the topic of forgiveness.
This came right out of the week of forgiveness that we did on this podcast.
There were so many incredible questions.
There was so much amazing feedback that I received that I decided I'm going to put together a free webinar on this to dive a little bit deeper into how do you forgive past trauma.
So if that is something that you're interested in,
Do go on my website,
Peaceunleashed.
Com and follow the link on the homepage.
It'll take you to a page where you can select which date and which time you want and you can sign up for it.
Space is limited.
So if you are interested in it,
Make sure you sign up and hop on there a few minutes early to make sure you don't get locked out of the webinar.
I look forward to coming back tomorrow and diving a little deeper into this topic.
Until then,
Check out Instagram.
Com and find peace unleashed on there.
That's where I share love notes with you on a daily basis that are meant to inspire and uplift you.
And until tomorrow,
I wish you a peaceful day.
