
Why True Love is Expansive & Not Possessive
This is a short talk on the nature of love where Fabienne shares her thoughts on why true love is expansive and not possessive.
Transcript
Why True Love is Expansive and Not Possessive by Fabienne Sandoval Love is not about possessing another.
Love will make you feel so free you can fly.
Love is growth.
Love embraces who you are as individuals with the knowing that together you create stardust.
I have been possessed by another in love before.
It's suffocating,
It's closed,
It's restrictive.
It only reveals the other person's incapability of loving by declaring them as immature,
Lacking growth and ultimately highlighting their insecurities and fear of love.
True love,
However,
True love is not possession.
True love is expansive,
It is open and it spans infinite lifetimes.
Monica Drake says,
The Buddhists say if you meet somebody and your heart pounds,
Your hands shake,
Your knees go weak,
That is not the one.
When you meet your soulmate you'll feel calm,
No anxiety,
No agitation.
When you meet that soulmate or spiritual partner you will know it because you will have a strong internal feeling of contentment.
It will not be busy or overzealous,
It will be patient and kind.
It will give you the power to soar,
To chase dreams,
Build bridges and make changes.
It will inspire you to be better every day.
A day won't pass without them caring for you,
Thinking of you,
Loving you.
It will be the greatest journey of your life,
An adventure you cannot prepare for.
You will learn as the journey unfolds what is required.
You will grow into the space.
It has taken many years for me to grow into this way of thinking.
I used to believe that love could be measured by how big your engagement ring was or the number of text messages you received in one day.
I used to think possessive behaviour was love.
I used to think it was normal,
That my partner checking up on me was sweet,
That being attached by the hip was romantic.
Now I see how full of fear these actions were.
Love is the highest vibration there is.
Fear is the lowest.
These two vibrations cannot both be present at the same time.
Therefore,
Relationships can only be based on two things.
A negative vibration of fear or a positive vibration of true,
Expansive,
Pure love.
John Lennon says,
There are two basic motivating forces,
Fear and love.
When we are afraid,
We pull back from life.
When we are in love,
We open to all that life has to offer with passion,
Excitement and acceptance.
We need to learn to love ourselves first,
In all our glory and our imperfections.
If we cannot love ourselves,
We cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create.
Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.
So how do we differentiate between love and fear?
Love is secure.
It's free.
It heals us.
It's accepting.
It's contentment.
Joy.
Forgiveness.
Energising.
Expansive.
And it believes in us.
Fear is insecure.
It's possessive.
It hurts.
It's judgemental.
It's needy.
Depressive.
Resentful.
Sapping of energy.
Contractive.
And doubtful.
All of the qualities assigned to love are positive.
For they are the true essence of love and provide that elevated feeling that is sought far and wide.
Fear is full of the negative emotions.
This is not how we want to be loving.
We may have lacked love from our parents or never been shown true love by a partner.
But it is up to us to change.
Love is our natural state of being.
It is time we begin to embrace our true nature and step away from possession,
From fear and into joy,
Freedom,
Expansion and true love.
When you have the choice,
Which you do,
Always choose love over fear.
4.8 (937)
Recent Reviews
Jason
December 18, 2025
This is really great and worth revisiting, at least for me personally
Mel
January 26, 2024
So beautiful and helpful! Thank you so much. I will keep listening until I can move past this fear
Nakia
August 9, 2023
Everything was said so perfectly. Just what I needed to hear.
Melissa
September 24, 2021
My favorite part was when it was said “meeting your true live feels calm. Like peace.” That is true for me.
April
August 18, 2021
A wonderful message. I will be taking this forward with me. Thank you for sharing. ❤️
Candice
May 14, 2020
Wow! This was great, it truly made me stop and think.. brought a lot of things into perspective that I really question myself but thought ehh, don’t question this is normal 😋thank you so much for this! I see better❤️ have a blessed day
Lucy
February 18, 2020
Loving your teachings
Jaq
December 29, 2019
This is very enlightening thank you for sharing
Frances
April 7, 2019
How true. Thank you for the well needed reminder... 💜X
María
March 30, 2019
Thank you so much Fabienne for this wonderful one. Love is our true nature for sure. 💖
Katrin
March 30, 2019
Thank you 🙏 ❤️😊
Bon
October 9, 2018
Perfect timing for this insightful inspiring message. Thank you 🙏🏼
Antonia
September 25, 2018
Really really really eye-opening....!!!! It just clicked & I just understood right now & through this talk, that the longterm relationship I was in for almost 10 years & ended 8 months ago, was absolutely fear-driven & absolutely & not love-driven as I thought!!!!....now, for sth about 3 weeks, I am surrounded by a highly love-led, love-giving partner who is loving himself & loving the time he spends with me & I do to.... wow, I am mesmerised!!!!!!!!! This talk is SO bookedmarked right now!!!!.... and this talk leads me to have a look at all my previous relationships & the water gets some much clearer....THANK YOU so MUCH!!!!!😍⚘🍃☀️🌹🦋💐🌸🌷🌙🌱🌻💖🌞🌼😀🎈❣🤓🙇♀️💗🙂❤🙏💓
Kevin
September 24, 2018
Thank you I needed this at this moment
Michael
September 21, 2018
I love how you distinguish love, especially in terms of vibrations (ie, love is highest vibration and fear the lowest). I believe that is true. Choose love over fear (and anger and sadness). Ie, Choose love over reaction. 🙏❤️
JOË
September 19, 2018
I love everything about this talk. It's so freeing!
Chris
September 19, 2018
Beautiful words and inspiring wisdom. Thank you
Lucinda
September 19, 2018
Very insightful and thought provoking! Thank you! ✨🙏
John
September 19, 2018
Insightful, polarizing, definitive, opening up awareness
Rachelle
September 19, 2018
Thank you this gives me clarity 🙏🏼💕
