How To Overcome Fear Of Missing Out

Questioner 1 – Sadhguruji,

One of the most trending questions that we have here on campus is FOMO,

The fear of missing out.

We have the fear of missing out on activities,

We have the fear of missing out on our placements,

We have the fear of missing out on anything whatsoever under the roof.

So,

Sadhguruji,

I have a question for you here is when do we realize that it's the end,

We have to stop this and this should not influence our decision making.

I think a lot of our community would resonate to this question and we want your perspective on this,

Sir.

Sadhguru – See,

Fear of missing out,

Let's look at life little beyond.

Your… your stay in the educational institution is only a transition,

Hmm?

Only to equip yourself for something you have come.

You have not come to an educational institution as a destination.

It's a packaging place to package you nicely so that you can… You packaged pretty well today.

Questioner 1 – Thank you,

Sir.

Sadhguru – So,

Not making a commentary on education,

But how we go through it about missing out,

The fear of missing out.

First of all,

Fear,

Let's address fear before we address missing out.

Fear is always about what may happen or may not happen,

Right?

Fear is not about what is… what we are experiencing right now.

What will happen is always the fear.

Or in other words,

Your fear is about something which is not yet.

Your fear is about something which does not exist.

This is all management people.

If there were a few… somebody from a psychiatry department,

You could have asked them,

If I have fear about something that does not exist,

What is my condition?

They would have a title for you.

Yes,

NIMHANS is close by,

I think.

We can always consult,

That is also a premier institution.

We are suffering something which doesn't even exist.

Yes?

If you're suffering something that doesn't even exist,

It is not about life,

It is not about education,

It's not about career,

It is just about your mind being out of control.

Is that not an important aspect that you should manage first before we allow you to manage an industry or a business?

Is it not important?

First of all,

You learn to at least manage your mind.

Hello?

Isn't it important?

If you do not know how to manage your mind,

What the hell are you going to manage in the world?

Managers are all freaking out and growing ulcers in their stomachs.

Yes?

Today it's become normal,

If you are a CEO by 45,

If you don't have an ulcer,

You're not a great CEO.

Because you are managing by accident like this,

The fear comes because there is an accidental possibility,

Isn't it?

Tell me,

Let's say you don't know how to ride a bicycle,

You sat on it,

It was on stand,

You were just pedaling for fun and it came off stand and started rolling.

Anxiety or no?

Started rolling faster,

Fear or no?

Very fast,

Terror or no?

It's not because bicycle produces terror,

It is just that you don't know how to ride.

If you know how to ride,

Faster it goes,

The better it is.

Hmm?

Isn't it?

Faster it goes,

The better it is.

The very basis why we created a bicycle is because we wanted to go faster than walking.

That's the idea.

But if you do not know how to ride,

How much fear it creates.

Right now your problem is not with the world,

Your problem is not with your education.

Your problem means your education system right from kindergarten,

Hasn't told you a damn thing about how to manage yourself.

They think you're going to manage the world without knowing how to manage yourself.

When you are a mess,

You can only create a mess,

Isn't it?

You may be successful.

Success happens for variety of reasons.

You know,

Success is not always hundred percent yours.

There are situations,

There are times which support us in many different ways.

Of course your bit is there,

But just because somebody is successful,

This doesn't mean they've figured out everything.

This doesn't mean they're at ease with life.

This doesn't mean their life is in some way fulfilled.

No,

Because today our idea of success is just doing little better than somebody else.

You doing little better than somebody else means,

And you're very happy about that,

What it means is you're actually enjoying other people's failures.

If somebody enjoys another person's failure,

I call that sickness not success.

What do you call it?

Hello?

I enjoy that you failed.

This is sickness.

This is not success,

Isn't it?

Unfortunately,

This is how you're going.

This is the reason why human potential is not unleashed.

Because if you're racing with a lame person,

You're just happy you're one step ahead of him.

Only when you meet Mr.

Bold,

You understand who the hell you are.

Yes?

Till then you think you're a great runner because other person doesn't have legs.

So it's very important that there is nothing to miss out in life.

Life is happening to all of us.

Question is only,

If I miss this party,

Am I missing out something?

If I miss this examination,

I'm missing out something.

If I miss this job,

Am I missing out something?

This is simply because right now,

Who you are is not internally managed.

It is externally stimulated.

You're still in a very controlled campus,

A very beautiful campus you have,

I have to say.

Wonderful campus.

And you're in a very controlled campus atmosphere.

When you step out into the world,

If you leave it to the people to decide what happens within you,

They're going to drive you crazy in no time.

Here it's all managed for you.

You're not managing this.

It's managed for you.

What should happen to you,

What should not happen to you,

Somebody else is managing it.

When you step out on the street,

If you leave it to other people's hands,

That they can decide whether you're happy or unhappy,

You're going to be miserable for sure.

Because they're going to do many things.

What happens within you must be determined by you,

Isn't it?

Hmm?

And anyway,

Why are you copying people?

Most people don't know what the hell they're doing.

This happened.

Shankaran Pillai joined Pentagon.

He was working in Pentagon.

Then he kept moving his work table from one office to another office,

Another office to another office,

He went on moving around.

Then he moved to the corridor,

He moved into the garden,

He moved here,

There.

Then he moved into the men's restroom and settled down there and started working.

Everybody was looking at this,

What's wrong with him,

Some problem.

Initially they thought he's a Russian agent.

Then.

.

.

Then he thought he must be a Muslim terrorist.

Then they thought all those things and everything ran out,

He didn't cause any harm to anybody.

Then he settled down in the men's restroom and started working.

So they told the Pentagon's psychiatrist that this guy's gone lonely,

He's working in the men's room.

And he settled down and he's just doing his work there.

So the psychiatrist just strolled in as if he wanted to use the men's room and started chatting.

Then he found he was quite normal,

Everything was fine with him.

He said,

Why are you sitting in the men's room and working?

He said,

I moved everywhere and so on.

I.

.

.

In the end I find this is the only damn place where people know what they're doing.