Spinning Without Getting Dizzy: Living With ADHD

06:08

Spinning Without Getting Dizzy: Living With ADHD

by Jane Stilwell

Rated

5

Type

talks

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

Plays

2

Living with ADHD can sometimes feel like living in a state of constant spinning. It can also feel like having twelve thoughts happening at once—and occasionally a Broadway musical thrown in for good measure. In this lighthearted, personal talk, I share what it’s like inside my constantly moving ADHD brain: the unexpected connections, the songs, the “What?” moments, the random questions, and the creativity that can come from all that mental motion. Over time, I’ve realized that I don’t actually need my brain to be still. I just need to know how to keep my bearings. Please note that this track is intended as a supportive resource and does not replace professional medical or psychological care.

Acceptance Meditation Adhd Creativity Mind Wandering Self Acceptance Focus Creative Thinking

Meet your Teacher

Bedford, TX, USA

Meet your Teacher

Bedford, TX, USA

Transcript

I'm glad you found your way here. My goal in sharing my experiences with you is to hopefully make you feel so not alone and maybe even help you find some joy living inside your ADHD brain like me. Although everyone has their own unique experience with their specific brain. Mine is definitely one that does not enjoy being quiet or still. There is a constant flow of thoughts, Observations, Questions, And Broadway musicals. It is so active that I frequently find myself literally spinning in circles. Usually, I'm looking for something that I just had in my hand. But with little success. Living inside an ADHD brain can also feel like spinning without even moving. Which can be frustrating and exhausting to say the least for me and the people in my life. The upside is that spinning isn't exclusively frustrating and exhausting. Sometimes it's funny and creative. And sometimes it's all of it at the same time. Like whether I am actively involved in a conversation or not, My brain continues to provide song lyrics, Movie quotes, Or can create an entire scene played out from a random word or thought. A seemingly simple moment can trigger an entire chain. Someone says, Blue. And my brain. Immediately checks off. Blue Christmas, Elvis. Christmas 1974. Family. Something my mother said. Being a teenager. And suddenly I'm wondering if I ever returned that library book in 1987. And poof! I've interrupted the conversation and asked them, Have you ever read Tiger Eyes? This is usually met with raised eyebrows, A confused look, And where did that come from? Not because I'm trying to wander off. My brain just takes the scenic route and then I get to walk them through my very logical chain that led to my seemingly random question. By having a front row seat to this creativity within my brain, I am convinced that all movies, Plays, Musicals, And fiction novels have ADHD authors. And apparently, I have not learned how to harness mine into a masterpiece yet. But I am, However, Frequently amused. And amusing. Believe it or not, There are people who don't mind me breaking out into song mid-sentence and sometimes join in. Or they also don't mind me explaining that crazy scene in my head. And I thoroughly enjoy it when I make them and myself laugh out loud. I think one of the most guaranteed things about my brain is the unwavering use of the word what. Wait, What? And then, Before the person can repeat themselves, I answer the question. Because apparently my brain needed three seconds to locate the information, But my mouth did not. Unfortunately, If someone doesn't know me well, And sometimes even if they do, The pointless what's can be quite frustrating. But they can't see or hear the 12 other things going on simultaneously. I cannot count the times I have wished I could let someone connect to my brain like Spock with his mind melt in Star Trek. Yes, I'm a bit of a nerd. But so they could understand what I live with 24-7. It is not for the faint of heart. Though once I realized how my brain worked, It became much easier to understand why I asked what so often. It took me just a moment to process what someone said because their words had to wind their way through all the moving parts. Kind of like Heath Ledger in A Knight's Tale. So now I tell people. If I ask what just way to beat, I will probably answer. I used to think that the end goal was to stop the spinning. To make my brain just be still. Or to find the off switch. Which as a child, I was absolutely convinced everyone had because of how frequently I was asked where my off switch was. We don't have off switches, So that was impossible. Now, Now I know I don't need it to be still. I just needed to learn how to navigate through all the moving parts. Maybe not so much like Heath Ledger, But. . . Maybe more like a ballerina. Now, I have never been a ballerina. Nor have I pretended to be one. But have you ever watched a ballerina do a series of pirouettes? They're spinning incredibly fast. But they don't become completely disoriented. They spot. They find a point to focus on, Then lose it as they turn and find it again. But they don't stop spinning. They just know how to keep their bearings. That's what I try to do. I am not going to stop having 12 thoughts at once. I am probably never going to stop breaking into song because somebody said a word or phrase that happened to be used on Broadway. And honestly, I don't want to. That's part of the fun. I just occasionally need to find my way back to my spotting point. And grab onto the thought that I started with.