Nothing Needs To Be Different - L,L,&L W/ Glenn Ambrose

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Nothing Needs To Be Different - L,L,&L W/ Glenn Ambrose

by Glenn Ambrose

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talks

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Not only do your negative experience not need to be different for you to awaken to more peace and happiness, they are the very things needed for you to awaken to more peace and happiness. I'm going through a difficult situation now and use it to help explain and show you how to use your circumstances to open instead of close.

Impermanence Awareness Resting As Awareness Emotional Resilience Spiritual Awakening Societal Conditioning Emotional Processing Personal Growth Life Coaching Peace Happiness Personal Growth Through Challenges

Meet your Teacher

Jamao al Norte, Dominican Republic

Meet your Teacher

Jamao al Norte, Dominican Republic

Transcript

Welcome to Life, Lessons & Laughter with your host, Glenn Ambrose. Hey, Welcome to the show, My friends. So here we are, Here we are. Where do I begin? It's been a whirlwind for me personally for like the last week and a half. So I guess I'll start there. Um, It's, You know, Most of you have heard me talk about my dog faith and how amazing she is. And, Um, She's been going through some health issues that has been an emotional rollercoaster. Because it looked like cancer. Then it looked like, Uh, There was going to be an amputation from her leg that was necessary. And then it looked like it was both legs. So then she was probably, Um, I was going to have to put her down and then maybe it's not cancer and maybe it's a fungal thing, But maybe she has two old breaks because in her legs, Because they're symmetrical and it's just the, Uh, Calcium buildup around those and blah, Blah, Blah. And different vets and opinions and research and friends helping. And, You know, It's been a lot. Um, And, You know, There's, Of course, I've got, You know, A very strong connection with her. So it's been, It's been emotional and, And, Um, Sad, You know, There's been moments of, Of deep sadness. Um, When, You know, When I only had. The negative information. It's seemingly getting more and more positive as time goes on. So we're getting more and more hopeful for a good turnout. There was time at the beginning I didn't have these. Other alternatives, I was being told that, Well, It must be this, You know. So I was, You know, Preparing myself for very difficult circumstances, Either an amputation or losing her. And I had to go through all those feelings. And, You know, It's been. This is, You know, One of the reasons I'm doing this podcast is because when I'm going through something, I like sharing it because it's kind of like, Like, Real life. Real time. Going through it as opposed to me talking about this six months later once I've already worked through everything. Like I'm still working through it, You know, I'm still going through this. So I think that it's, It's more effective because it, You know, Not only does it give a more realistic insight to how I live because I tried to walk the walk, Not just talk the talk. And I try to live these teachings to the best of my ability. So I think I'm more likely to share an honest outlook. About this you know and you guys probably picking up on some of my feelings and emotions as I go through this because it's you know it's It's happening right now. You know, So, So yeah, That's, You know, This is what I'm going through. I was just a little distracted. Some people are doing something outside my house. Sorry about that. Yeah, When I'm when I'm working or podcasting, I need to be completely focused. Other people can work with with a bunch of stuff going on around them. I can't. I'm not good at that. So. Yeah, So I just thought that you guys might be able to get, You know, Like if I'm going to share more vulnerability, It's going to be in the in the moment as opposed to afterwards, You know. So that's one of the reasons why I wanted to do this. And it was kind of a topic that I was interested in doing anyway, That, You know, It's. I mean, I was just trying to think about how often I have seen this topic over the last 23 years. I can't count. I mean, Dare I say absolutely everyone I've ever known or ever talked to in the last 23 years, Bar none. Has experienced this to some degree. I think everybody experiences this because it's society. Society tells us that, You know, Our societal conditioning, It's just how society functions. It's socially acceptable. It's what we think is appropriate as a society because We're all living in an unconscious society that doesn't make any sense. We we do dysfunctional things on a daily basis and then wonder why we're struggling to interact with life in a healthy way. It's because we're conditioned to do things in really poor ways. You know, So one of the things is, You know, It's a it's a version of victim mentality, Like it's thinking that something needs to be different. Externally for us to awaken spiritually. Well, You know, I, I, You know, Really what's I'm sorry, I just saw this flash of everything that I see on like, I'm on a lot, A lot of in a lot of spiritual groups and circles and like I see this incessantly, It's just in the spiritual circles is, You know, People are like, Well, You know, I had to get myself out of that situation because it was blocking my spiritual growth. No, It wasn't. It was there for your spiritual growth. I mean, You know, Like, Of course, There are extreme circumstances, Which everybody goes, Yes, You don't understand, Glenn. Mine was an extreme circumstance. No, It's usually not. What I mean by extreme circumstances, If somebody is physically beating you or your children, Then you need to get out of there and get to safety. As a general rule, You know, There of course is probably some extreme other situations, But as a general rule, That's kind of it. Just for physical safety. Other than that, You do not have to get out of your dysfunctional relationship to open up spiritually. You do not have to find a job to open up spiritually. You do not need to stabilize your income or your finances or your relationships or your housing situation, Or your car, Or your toilet, Or anything else. It doesn't need to be different for you to wake up. Spiritually. In fact, They are, Those are literally the situations that will wake you up. That's why they're happening. They're there to wake you up. They're not there to stop you from waking up. Right? So, You know, And I remember learning this in recovery. It's, You know, Because I mean, You think about it, You know, I'm just talking about how most people in the spiritual circles have some version of this. Well, Think about, Think about alcoholics and addicts. I mean, Geez, They're the poster children for this. Like they're running around like you don't understand why, Because they're used to manipulating circumstances and being the victim of them. So they're really good at this. And they're like, No, You don't know. And I was really good at it. That's how I know. So it's like, You know, No. Well, If I just stay, You know, If I just get a job, You know, I'm homeless. So if I just get a job, If I can just have my health, If I could just if my ex would just let me see my son, If I could just if I could just if I could just then. I can get my bearings and get sober. And they actually believe it. You know, And just like spiritual people or people leaning towards self-help in any way, Shape or form, They actually believe it. Why? Because we're addicted to think that if If all the external is stabilized, Then we feel good on the inside. And that's exactly why We're all messed up. Because it doesn't work that way. Life doesn't work from the outside in. Like if you get everything all stabilized, That doesn't mean you're going to be happy on the inside. It might mean that you're not in the midst of extreme suffering at that particular moment. You know, It might mean that you might be able to breathe a little easier in that particular moment, But that's exactly. What doesn't induce a spiritual awakening. Nobody ever woke up when they had all these problems and then they gave it time or work through them or all this stuff. And then they had no problems. And then all of a sudden they woke up spiritually. Like it's never happened like that. Dare I say. Maybe once, Most likely never. Excuse me, I need some water. You know, Some people might say it happened that way for people who came in a different door. But if you look closely at that door, That's not actually what happened. Because there is a door that people come into spirituality where you know, They always want to be rich and famous because they're like, Well, You know, Adoration makes them feel good about themselves. And this is and they latched on to that at a young age. And that's all they want. And they just want to be rich and famous. And, You know. And then they get it and they achieve it. And then they have everything, You know, They just have all the money in the world, All the fame in the world. And then they go, Oh, Wait, Crap, This isn't it. I'm not happy. This isn't it. So then they crash and they find spirituality that way. I think Jim Carrey was one example of that. So, I mean, It does happen that way, But. But one, They're not happy. They're not sitting there going, Oh, Okay, Everything's stable. Now I can, You know, Now I can wake up spiritually. That's not what they're saying. They're like, I have everything that I want. And I'm miserable. Like that was actually the beginning of, Well, You know, It was not exactly the same, But a similar door that started my spiritual awakening. Because, You know, When I was an alcoholic for 20 years, I expected to be unhappy. It's, You know, It's kind of part of the gig. You're, You're a victim of life. You, You drink, Nobody understands you, You know, The tortured artist type, Um, Outlook and so you kind of expect to be unhappy. Really, The beginning of my end was once I got married and my son was born and I pulled myself together. Now, Granted, I was still drinking, But I pulled myself together. I bought a house. Um, Had a new car in a driveway had started my business was personal training. You know, Like I had everything that I thought. I wanted. And that I had never had before in life. And I was more miserable than ever. And that's when I really started freaking out because I was like, Oh my God, Like I expected to be unhappy when I was a loser, But now I did everything that everybody told me I was supposed to do. And I'm more miserable than when I was a loser. Like now I'm really screwed. Does happiness even exist? Like that's an existential crisis, You know, That, That, And that's what, You know, And then I dove into the bottle and drugs and, And, You know, It was ugly. It was more ugly from that point on. For the next two years, That was the worst I ever was. And I mean, I was before that I had times of major depression. You know, Wanting to end it, All this stuff, Even in temps. And I was worse. In the two years that followed that once I had gotten everything the two years after that was I mean. I was a complete mess. You know, I mean, I was my body started literally shutting down because I was abusing it so much. So. My point here is, Is that like, It's nothing needs to be different. And you can't sit there and say, Okay, Well, You know, If I can come in the doorway, Like Jim Carrey and get rich and famous, And then find out that that's not it. I think I'll choose that way. Like you don't get to choose your doorway. Like you can't. It doesn't, It doesn't work that way. It has to be, It has to be unconscious because if you're choosing your doorway, That means you understand the doorways and you're trying to manipulate the system and the universe is way too smart for you. It doesn't work that way. You can't choose to suffer in a particular way so that you spiritually awaken. You have to choose spiritually awakening. You, You can't go, Well, Yeah, I'm gonna, You know, I'm just gonna get rich and famous. And then I'll find out that that's not it. No, If, If you If that's your plan, You already know that getting rich and famous isn't it, At least to some degree. So what you're doing is you're trying to manipulate the universe for it to give you a bunch of money, Because that's what you want on an egoic level. So you're trying to play the game, You're trying to outsmart the universe and go like, Nah, Man, I'm just gonna like, You know, I'm going to open that way. You know, I'm going to pretend that I don't know that it isn't everything and then I'll get everything and then I'll open up spiritual. It's like you. You can't. The universe knows what you know. So like better than you do. So like even if you know this stuff on an unconscious level, But you don't know on a surface level, If you stop playing that game and you start trying to manipulate the universe, It's not going to work. You know, It's just sorry, Like you, The universe is smarter than you. You can't outsmart it. You can't manipulate the universe. It's divine intelligence. It's created just everything there is through this divine intelligence. And you think that you're a little clever. Thing is going to do it. And I laugh because I mean, The reason I know this is because I've tried it, Man. I didn't know all this stuff. I didn't even you know, Like there was times early on when I was trying to manipulate the universe and I didn't know that I was trying to manipulate it. I wasn't like I wasn't like, Yeah, I'm going to manipulate it. I was just trying to bury something that I knew so I could kind of try to take an easier path. And I wasn't consciously aware that I was doing it. And then later on, Once it wasn't working and the suffering increased and I'm going, Why, Why? And I get this deep understanding. It's like, Oh my God. There was a part of me that knew that and I was trying to deny that I knew that. And I was just trying to manipulate the universe. This is ridiculous. This is how I, You know, Learn this stuff is through trial and error. I've done it. So I know you can't do it because I tried. So. Nothing has to be different for you to wake up. You know, Nothing has to be different. You don't need to change your relationship. You don't need to get your finances in order. You don't need to like, Not only do you not need to, But like, It would actually hinder it if you did, Because you're not suffering anymore. You know, There's a lot of people who, Who work with life coaches when their life is horrible. And then like, They haven't gotten to the level of real peace and contentment in their lives on a daily basis yet. Uh, But they stop anyway, Because they're good. Like they can't, You know, They started working with me or another life coach because, Um, Their life, It felt like their life was falling apart. And then once they kind of stabilized everything, They're like, Yeah, I'm good. I think I'll save the money or I don't really have a desire to go any further. My life is manageable. It was unmanageable. So I'm good. You know, I'm not really peaceful all the time. I'm not really happy all the time, But maybe I don't need to be, Or maybe I shouldn't be or something. And sometimes that's just part of their journey. And sometimes people just have lowered the bar. Society does that a lot. We lower the bar. We lower our standards to meet our circumstances. This is why I've talked about it many times with the unconscious public. What's socially acceptable, And this plays into our conditioning, What's socially acceptable is like people say stuff that doesn't make any sense all the time. I'm 58 years old. They're 58 years old and they're like, Oh, Well, I couldn't start anything new now. I mean, I'm 58. What? Like, What are you? Why? Well, I'm 58. Yeah, That's not a reason, That's an age. Well, It's too late. Oh, Are you dying tomorrow? Well, No, But. . . It's like they just they say these things that just they don't mean anything. And it's like, You know, Oh, Well, You know, I couldn't go back to school. That'd be hard. So going to work at a job that you hate every day isn't hard. Well, I'm not gonna leave my marriage even though I'm unhappy because I mean, You know. Not going to start over at this age. Or that'd be hard, Or like. Like, Really? That's your bar? Anything that's just. You'll just settle for whatever you have, Even if you don't like it. Because you just don't care enough to put in the work for something better. I just don't understand that type of thinking. I mean, I haven't lived the normal life. You know. And in a lot of ways I suffered and struggled probably more than most. I've never settled. I've never settled. I've never looked at something that I thought would enhance my life. And when Nah. I'll just stay with what I have that I don't really like instead of doing what it takes to achieve that. Like I've just never done that. Like, And you know, Some of the time maybe I. Handled things in the wrong way. Especially when I was drinking. But I just never settled. So we have to be careful that we don't. That we don't just lower the bar and say, Eh. Good enough. Things are good enough. And by that, I mean, You know, Making excuses. For not. Reaching for what we want, And that can be our spiritual awakening. You know, Settling you like you can't have a spiritual awakening settling. You like. How would you? Eh, I don't like my life, But I'll stick with it. Okay, Well there's no. . . There's no movement towards anything better. There's no striving. There's no looking for there's no trying to be a better version of yourself. So you're not you know, So those people aren't going to awaken. But there's many people, So we don't really have to worry about them that much, Right? But there's many people that do want to awaken, That do want peace in their life, That do want contentment. And those are the people that are listening at this podcast. And what I'm saying is. Don't. Think that you need to stabilize your external circumstances first. Oh, I can't catch my breath. Yeah, That's because you're resisting. The negative reality that you're in. That's why you're completely depleted. Like, You know, Like I've been going through a lot and. This last week and a half, And it's been emotional. Now, Have people gone through things that are more emotional and more difficult? Abso-freaking-lutely. But this has triggered my emotions in certain ways. And I think that it's particular ways to help me open up more because, You know, Like there was last week. All the sadness was coming up. You know and i was crying And I'm laying with faith and I'm crying. And and of course, At first I was worried about her and and sad that there was something wrong with her and she was in pain and that she was probably going to have to go through a difficult transition. And it was a lot. I just kept saying this is a lot. It's just it's just a lot. I was having trouble wrapping my brain around everything and feeling comfortable. And I cried and like and I allowed myself to cry and I didn't think that there was something wrong with me crying or there was something wrong with what was happening. Like I didn't I didn't allow myself to fall into that victim mode and go, Why? Why is this happening? She doesn't deserve it. It's like we all deserve it. Like this is part of life. We don't. Nobody signed a contract that said we're going to live a certain amount of years and we're not going to experience any suffering and we're not going to get any diseases or we're not going to break any bones or we're not going to go through any physical or emotional pain. Like that doesn't there's no contract that says that when we come here. As a matter of fact, If you look at reality, It's blatantly clear that that is not the case, That most things go through some sort of level of suffering and pain on an emotional and or mental, I mean, And or physical level and mental. We all go through our shit. We all deal with stuff. So it's actually the most natural thing in the world when you are on planet earth to experience this type of stuff. Which We need to start wrapping our brains around that because everybody else in society is telling us that if something is going wrong in our lives, Then there must be something wrong with the universe. And it's not fair. And we are a victim. And it shouldn't be happening. And blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah. And this is our idea of supporting one another. Oh, You poor thing. Oh, You shouldn't have to go through this. Oh, This isn't fair. It's not your fault. It's this, This is just, Oh, That's life can be so unfair. Oh, This is just so unfair. This is horrible, You shouldn't have to go through. What are you talking about? Like all you're doing is you're like energetically and information wise, If you look at what those words mean, It means that life hates you and is kicking you in the teeth over and over again for no apparent reason and it's not fair and it shouldn't be happening. How is that supposed to make me feel better? That doesn't make me feel better. That makes me feel worse. Life hates me and is kicking me in the teeth for no apparent reason. And I'm supposed to feel warm and fuzzy. No. And I know that that's not people's intention. I know their intention is to allow you to have your feelings or freaking something that doesn't make any fucking sense whatsoever because they haven't thought it through. You know I get jazzed up with this stuff, Man. I've got no patience for the victim mentality. And it's so socially acceptable now. It's just, Please, Could we just stop saying stupid shit and just think for a moment? Just think deeply about something before it comes out of our mouth, Please. It's just 300, 000 people say, And everybody goes, Yeah, Well, That must be the right thing to do. I mean, You know, My heart's in the right place and I just want to support this person. It's like, Just stop and think. What does this mean? What do these words mean? And pretending they don't mean anything, That's even worse. That's the other thing that people say. They're like, No, I was just trying to give a good sentiment. It doesn't really mean anything. I was just trying to be nice. It's like, Well, That's even worse. So you just told me something that means absolutely nothing, You loose-lipped freak, When I'm going through a difficult situation. Like, How is that better? Think about what we're saying. What we're saying means something and it has energy and it actually has a deeper meaning than the words that come out of your mouth. So when you say it's not your fault, This isn't fair, That's saying that the universe has some personal problem with you and you are going to suffer at its hands for no apparent reason. Good luck. That's what it means. Energetically, Intellectually, Logically, However you want to look at it, That's what it means. And I understand that that's not what people are trying to say. So you should say something that you're actually trying to say, But you need to think deeply to figure that out. If you want to support people, Figure out how to support them. And this delusion that there's something wrong with death or sickness is just mind boggling to me. There is not something wrong with death or sickness. It is literally impossible for somebody to leave this planet too early. Oh, They left too early. What are you talking about? Show me their contract that says they're supposed to stay here for 82. 6 years. They left this earth too soon. No, They didn't. They left it right on time. And I don't give a shit what happened. They left it when they were supposed to leave. That's another thing I learned from my crazy youth. Do you have any idea how many times I should have died? I mean, Really should have died, Like falling off a seven story building, Like getting electrocuted, Like like the the the. Airborne in cars, Etc, Etc, Etc, Drug overdoses, Like all these times that I should have been dead and I just wasn't. And then, You know, Friends of mine just dying because they tripped. Like, Are you kidding me? We go when it's our time. You know, So. We have to use these things to open. We don't have to wish they were different. We don't have to try to stabilize our thing. Let me just make it through this difficulty. And then I'll go work on myself. Like, Okay. And then, Then they work through the difficulty, Like I've seen this happen a million times. So then they work through a difficulty and they go, You know, And I'm like, They're like, Oh, You know, Just reach out in a couple months. I reached back on a couple months. Like, Hey, Did you make it through that? They're like, Yeah, Yeah, I did. Thank you. You know, That was a difficult time. But, You know, We live in a world where everything's constantly changing. So eventually this too shall pass. And it did. Thank God. Okay, Cool. So do you want to start working together? No, I think I'm gonna catch my breath a little bit. That was a lot. I'm just gonna catch my breath. Check with me in a couple months. Okay, So a couple months goes by you check with them. They're like, Hey, Do you want to work? You want to start working on yourself? No, You know, I'm feeling pretty good. I'm feeling pretty good. You know, Everything's kind of leveled off and, And I rested and I'm feeling good. So now I don't think I need to do anything. Oh, Okay. So then, You know, A couple months later they start going through some shit and they reach out and they're like, Hey, You know, Uh, I think I need some help. My life's falling apart. Oh, Okay. You want to work through it? Well, Let me just stabilize this. And, And then, Um, Uh, You know, It's cause it's just a lot right now. I'm like, Here we go again. You know, That's the cycle most people go on, Whether it's with a life coach. Or whether it's not with a life coach, Even more people go through it without a life coach, Of course, You know, And these aren't people that I I'm actually working with. I just have seen this cycle with people who who think they might want to work with me, You know. But I see it out. You know, I see people going through this all the time. Oh, My God. It's so difficult. So difficult. Oh, Yeah. Well, You know, This could be a really good time to open up and work, Use this to find a new level of peace and happiness. Oh, I can't right now. You don't understand. It's so hard. Oh, OK. Well, Now I need to rest. Oh, Well, Now everything's OK. Oh, Now everything's messed up again. Like that's just, That's life. That's what, That's the cycle of life. So. The things that are going wrong are portals. Those are literally going wrong to be used in a way of waking up. So as I'm going through this and I'm laying there crying with faith going through this difficult thing, And I'm feeling all the sadness from this particular situation, All of a sudden, Now I'm very careful. About not creating stories in my head, Because, You know, When you're crying, It actually feels good to release some of that stuff. And what most people do is they go, Oh, My God, This is so unfair. It's oh, My God, This is so wrong. Oh, My God. And she shouldn't have to go through this. And I feel so bad that she's suffering. And they'll keep replaying all these horrible thoughts in their head basically to keep themselves crying so they can purge more. And that's exactly what you don't want to do. Because what that does is you're not actually purging because your body doesn't know the difference between whether you're experiencing something or whether you're thinking about experiencing something. It functions the same way. So what you're doing is, Yes, You are releasing by allowing yourself to cry and feel it, But you're replacing it with your thoughts. You're basically replacing almost everything that you're releasing. So I don't do that. I'm just sitting there and I'm allowing myself to feel it, But I'm not thinking I'm going, Oh my God, Wow, I'm really sad. There's a lot of sadness here. Wow. This feels like heaviness in my chest. Um, Wow. You know, Oh my God, This is a lot. Wow. I'm really experienced. This is very sad. Look at all the sadness I have. So I'm being the observer instead of creating some story around it that feeds it. So as I'm doing this, Since I'm not creating a story. All of a sudden, You know, I start like halfway through my crying fit. All of a sudden, I'm going like, Wow, There's a lot of sadness here. And I'm and I'm like, Wow, I think some of this isn't even attached to this particular circumstance. I think it's just buried sadness, You know, Because before my go to was was anger and rage. So, Like, I I've talked about this before. Energy can transmute inside of you and since I didn't know how to handle sadness That sadness would shift into anger and rage and I would really I would try release it that way To some degree so I wasn't really good at sitting with Sadness and I had to and I've gotten better at that over the years and when I was sitting here I'm like wow this kind of feels like it's not all about this situation. This is like buried sadness about other difficulties in the past or something. And I think it was, But as I'm doing that, I'm observing it and I'm like, Yeah, And I'm going. Yes, Let's use this to open up my heart even more. I'll feel it, As uncomfortable as it is and as painful as this feels energetically and emotionally, I'm opening more. I'm not closing off to it. I'm not constricting and tightening and going, No, I don't want to feel this. This feels bad. I don't like this. I'm doing the opposite. And I'm using it to open me, Going, Yes, Because that portal is open. That's why I'm crying, Because I've opened my heart and allowed myself to feel that sadness. So this is an opportunity for me to really feel more sadness, Not only to allow the sadness that that was within me to come out, Which is obviously beneficial. But on top of that, I'm learning through physical practice, How to experience sadness on a deep level without constricting, Without closing off to it, Without resisting it. So my heart can stay even more open as I walk through everyday life. And I can experience, I'm supposed to be experiencing emotions. That's part of what this life is. And through a lot of the pain that I experienced in earlier years, I closed off portions of my heart. So when I have an opportunity to open it more, And allow myself to feel and to experience life unfiltered without me trying to control it or resist it and just feel it as it is. That's opening. That's, That's spiritual practice. That's using your difficulties to open your heart, To open yourself because that's the two, You know, We live on a dualistic planet. There's, There's yang, There's yang, There's, There's, And energetically, Which we are energy, There is constriction and there's flow. Flow is open, Constriction is closed. So, I'm practicing using this as an opportunity to practice experiencing life being open. And not closing off and restricting because I don't like the way it feels. Which is another thing that that victim mentality does. It forces us to close because the pain is so much. This is why a lot of times we have to do this a little at a time. This is why I woke up kind of boom 23 years ago. And for years, I was wide open. But like over living a very busy life, Being a single parent and starting my business and all this stuff, Like certain aspects of me kind of closed back off a little bit. So I'm not as open now as I was when I first woke up. When I first woke up, I was just like cheesecloth, Man. Everything went through me. I was just like, Huh? You know, And this is I'm trying to get back to that. I'm doing a lot of work right now to get back to that, Because now's the time for me. You know, I've, I've, I've handled all, All these responsibilities of being a father and, And moving over here was, There was a lot of difficulties that I had to go through and a lot of things I needed to learn and work through and all that stuff. So it's like, Now's this time. So I'm using it. Using my difficulties. You know, There's no coincidence that this situation is happening now. I mean, I've been deep diving into my own spiritual work more than I. . . Have. I don't know, Maybe possibly. Well, I did do a lot of spiritual work. I've done a lot of work on myself spiritually over the years, But this is right now in the last few weeks, This has been the most concentrated effort that I've done in a long time, Many years. And there's no. Coincidence that this situation is happening with faith right now. It's coming in because it's a tool for me to use to open more. Why is it coming now? It's because I'm leaning in this direction. So the universe or God or whatever you believe in is giving me I'm showing a real concerted effort that I want to be open and I want to open up the rest of the way. And that's so as I put my energy towards that, As my intentions towards that, Then that universe starts bringing me situations. It's like, Oh, My God, Look at Glenn. Look at Glenn. He's ready. He's doing it. Look at all the effort he's putting into this. Look at how seriously he's taking this. Look at him go. Like, He really wants this. Like, Let's help him. Because that's, It loves me. Of course it loves me. Hey, Faithy. Don't be looking in that trash. You ain't eating anything out of that. She came to say hi. Um. . . So yeah, So now all of a sudden circumstances start coming into my life. And, You know, Like if I'm going to drop into victim mode, I'm going, Why now? Here I am trying to wake up and all this horrible stuff that's dragging my attention away from waking up is happening. It's like, No, No, No, No, No. It's not happening to drag your attention away from waking up. It's happening so you can use it to wake up. That's what our difficulties are for. That's the ironic part. It's counterintuitive. See, When we experience something we don't like, We have a tendency to close off and push away from it. And that's exactly what's wrong with us. This is why we suffer. Because whenever circumstances come in that we don't like, We close off. And we suffer through and then it ends and we're like, Oh, My God, I don't. Oh, I got to make sure I don't experience that again. So then we go back out into life and we're fearful because we don't want to experience anything remotely similar to what we just went through because it was horrible and we closed off and we didn't open to it. We didn't learn through it. So what we did. So what we do is we we get scared and we try to prevent we try to control external life so we don't experience things that we don't like. And then something else happens. That we don't like. And then we close off more and we put up another wall and we try to control things more. And then by the time, You know, You're my age, It's it's like half your life is just if you really are honest with yourself and really looking at it, Half of your mental and emotional energy goes in life. Half of your life force energy just goes trying to control things and make sure nothing happens that you don't like. Well, I'll get 32 opinions from 32 mechanics. So, Because I got taken advantage of by a mechanic once. I have to make sure that that doesn't happen again. Oh, I, You know, The. I missed my flight once. Oh, Well, Now I'm going to show up at the airport four days early and spend the next three nights at the hotel next to the airport so I can walk over so I don't miss a flight again because that happened. And when you're in your 50s, You've got a list of 100, 000 of those things. You know. So if we're going to live peacefully on planet Earth, We have to understand that there is a percentage of our time that is going to be spent going through things that we don't particularly enjoy forever on planet Earth. It's not going to stop. Now, When you're in negative headspace and you're worrying all the time and you're just fearful and all that stuff, Of course you actually bring more problems in. So that's even worse, Right? But let's say your life consists of 70% problems and 30% good times because you're just in that flow. You're constantly trying to protect yourself, But you're worried and that fear just keeps generating more negative experiences and you're not learning and the universe is trying to get you to learn. So there's just more negative experiences. So you're like experiencing negativity more often than positivity. Okay. You do your spiritual work. You use this stuff to open. And then you get to a spot where Um. . . You're really open, Right? Like, Let's say you've done a ton of work and difficulties don't really bother you anymore. You're not trying to protect yourself from them. You know you can handle them if they come and when they come, Because they will. And then they come and everybody is like, Well, Your car just got totaled while you were in the grocery store. And you're like, Oh, Wow. Is everybody OK? Like, Yeah, Everybody's fine. Like, Oh, Well, That's good. I'm glad nobody got hurt. They're like, Yeah, But your car's totaled. The person was drunk and drove right into it. But they're okay and I'm okay, So. And they're like, Why aren't you mad? You're supposed to be mad. It's like, Why? What does being mad get me, Other than a bunch of negative energy through my body that I don't enjoy? Why do we think we're supposed to get mad and experience all kinds of negative toxins flowing through our body, Negative experiences, Lashing out out of anger and all that stuff. And that's appropriate. Why is that appropriate? It doesn't benefit anything. All it does is make everything worse in every way. But society says that's what we're supposed to be doing. That's that's healthy. No, We have to learn to go through it. That's life, Man. If we're expecting anything other than that on planet earth, We're deluding ourselves. We're delusional and we're not looking at life. Life is a dualistic planet. Sometimes good things are going to happen and sometimes things that you don't prefer are going to happen. Always, Forever, No matter how much spiritual work you do, If you're lucky, You're probably going to get yourself to a place where there's like 70% peace and 30% things that you don't particularly like. But you'll be able to experience peace even going through things that you don't like. That's what spiritual growth is. So, You know, Like, Yes, You can manifest more problems when you're negative. And then But but people think that another way to manipulate the universe, They're like, Well, I'm going to I'm going to get really good at handling things and then the universe won't have to teach me anything. And then I won't experience any negativity in my life anymore. It's like, No, That's not how it works. You're still going to experience negativity. It's just it's it doesn't have to upset you. That's all. It's much easier to go through things that you wouldn't prefer happening. If somebody came up and said, Hi, Would you like your car totaled while you're grocery shopping or would you not? Well, I'd be like, I would prefer not, Thank you. If you're taking orders, I would like to put in an order for not having my car totaled while I'm grocery shopping. Thank you. And then it doesn't happen. That would be a cool world to live in, But we don't live in that world. Stuff that we don't prefer is going to happen. It's can we walk through it openly without closing off and shutting ourselves down and experiencing fear and victimization and all this stuff. So that's what I'm doing with this situation. I'm using it to open me and say, Yes, I don't like how this, I don't like how I feel. I don't like this situation. I don't, I would not prefer this to be happening, But it is. And I'm facing it wide open. In. Without resistance, And I'm allowing it. And whatever sadness is here, I will allow myself to feel that sadness. And when I do that, It's manageable. Because I'm like the whole time, And I've had some pretty good crying fits, Probably two, Three of them or so over the last week. And at no point was I dropping in and going, This isn't fair. This shouldn't be happening. No, Like, No, This is appropriate for planet Earth. It is supposed to be happening. And I'm open to it happening. And I will feel what I need to feel even as it's happening. And what's cool about that is I fully allow myself to experience the sadness, But there's this other piece underneath. This is what spirituality truly is. It's this bandwidth underneath. That is going. It's immovable. It's like. . . I'm okay. I'm going to be okay. It's okay that this is happening. This is life. There's nothing wrong with it. There's nothing inappropriate with it just because I don't like it. And it makes me sad and I will allow myself to experience sadness as I walk through this. But it doesn't mean that it shouldn't be happening or there's something wrong or that I won't be okay. I can experience sadness. I can experience things that I don't particularly prefer, But still know that I'm okay deep down in my spiritual baseline and that I am going to get through this. Somehow, Some way, Even when I don't know how. And sometimes I had to ask for help. You know, I'm not real good at asking for help. I'm very independent. But you know what, I reached out to people. And some of my messages, I was half crying or breaking up and going, This is a lot. Sometimes that's all I could say. I was so overwhelmed with sadness, I just was saying, This is just this is a lot. It's this is just a lot. Breathe, Glenn. This is a lot. This is just the lot. Like I probably said that to the vets like three or four or five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, 10 times. This is a lot. I said it a bunch of times. Because it was, It was just a lot for me to process. Mentally as well as emotionally. You know, So what did I do? I, You know, I contact my friend over here. That's, You know, Just such a blessing because he's always there for me. He's always there for me, Man. He's just such a good, My friend, Junior is just such a good person. And, You know, He does what he needed to do to figure out how to get me and the dog to. Santiago, That's an hour and a half away to make sure she got the best care and to simplify everything for me and to drive for me. So so, You know, I didn't have to think about driving. I didn't. He took his car. So I didn't have to think, You know, Oh, My God, Like, You know, My car needs a couple of repairs. So I didn't want to think like, Oh, My God, Is, You know, Is my car breaking down? I just wanted things simple so I could just focus on faith. And he helped make that happen. You know, And I had to ask for that. And I asked other people for help in other ways. I even found somebody that was able to refer an animal communicator to me so I could have them talk to Faith and find out what she was feeling and going through and thinking. Which was really pretty cool. That's a whole nother deal. But that helped me process a bunch of emotions. That was very emotional. So yeah, Use the situations you're going through, The difficulties, They are not there to block you from your spiritual awakening. They're there to induce your spiritual awakening. If you use your difficulties to open, If you use your difficulties to grow through, You know, Like when you're in relationships, Oh, I'm struggling with my partner and it's making life harder. And that's why I can't focus on my spirituality. It's like, No, That is your spirituality. That is happening in your life for you to open spiritually. So if you just get rid of the person you're in a relationship with, All that's going to happen is like, You're going to get rid of them. Things will get, You'll go through whatever that process entails. Which, You know, Depending on the relationship, Whether it's a marriage, How long it's been, Et cetera, Whether there's kids involved, That could take years to work through. But then once you finally get through it, You're just going to go start dating somebody just like that person because you didn't learn what you, What that was there to teach you. You know, Tell me we all haven't seen that a million times, People repeating relationship patterns and they all say, No, I'm not going to do it. Bull. You don't have a choice. So your situation is there. To open you. That's what your difficulty is there for. It's to open you. This is why we come to planet earth. The good times are wonderful and they balance things out and it's fun and all that stuff. And it is an experiential world. So the good times are about experiencing and taking advantage of all the beauty on this planet and all the diversity. You know, These amazing experiences that sure, That's wonderful. And that's part of it. But that's not really where we grow. And that's not really why we're here. We're not just here to play where I mean, Like, If you learn, Like if you if you learn through how to go through your difficulties to open you, Then you can get to the place where life is basically just about experiences. But you have to open up spiritually first. You can't just play with life and think you're not going to grow, And you're not going to become a better version of yourself, And you're just going to play. No. Once you learn to be a better version of yourself and learn to handle difficulties spiritually, And then life can kind of be like a playground because negative things will still happen, But they're not going to knock you off center. You'll just experience them and be like, Yeah, Well, This is part of life. I prefer it not to happen, But it is. So whatever it is, What it is. And you just experienced the negative times. Then you go back to playing. But you can't do that if you don't learn to open through your negative experiences. You can't get to that point. By trying to avoid negative experiences or getting all knocked around when you're going through one. You'll never get to that point where life is just fun or mostly fun. So use these experiences to open, Open, Open, Open, Allow, Open, Experience it. All right. That's that. Thank you all. I appreciate you. Let me know if I can help and I will talk with you soon. Peace.