This meditation is based on week 4 of The Artist's Way,
Recovering our sense of integrity.
This meditation is titled,
Coming Home to Your Own Voice.
Once again make yourself comfortable.
Let your hands rest.
You may close your eyes,
Soften your gaze.
Or look gently at one place in the room.
Take a slow,
Easy breath in.
And a gentle breath out.
Once again.
Breathing In and breathing out.
Feel the support beneath you.
Whether it's the chair,
Or the bed,
Or the mat,
Or the earth,
Feel the support beneath you.
And imagine that you are sitting in a quiet room.
It does not have to be a room you have ever seen.
Let it take whatever shape feels welcoming.
There's a place for you to sit.
There is enough light to see.
There is room to breathe.
For the while.
The room has been filled with many voices.
Some belong to people who care about you.
Some belong to people who had expectations of you.
Some are the countless voices of articles,
Messages,
Feeds and stories that you have taken in.
You do not need to judge any of them.
Imagine simply turning down their volume.
Not forever,
Just for the few moments.
As the room goes quieter.
Notice your own breathing.
Notice that there is a life here.
Beneath all the roles you play.
A person who has preferences.
A person who feels.
A person who may have said,
I'm OK.
When the truth was more tender.
Or more complicated.
Silently ask.
What am I really feeling?
You might receive a clear answer.
You might notice more than one feeling.
You might not know yet.
Whatever arrives,
Let it be allowed.
You can say to yourself.
I am willing.
To be honest.
Without being harsh.
I can acknowledge a feeling.
Without rushing.
Into a decision.
Now imagine a younger part of yourself entering the room.
You do not need to see a clear picture.
Perhaps you remember a child who liked to play.
Collect.
Sing,
Build,
Draw,
Imagine,
Explore or ask questions.
Perhaps you simply sense that somewhere within you,
Is the part that still knows what delight feels like.
Ask gently.
What have you missed?
What have you missed?
Notice anything that comes.
Akalo.
A place.
A sound an activity or the feeling.
There is no need to make a promise you cannot keep.
Perhaps you can offer this younger part of you.
One small thing this week.
A little time.
A wall.
Some music.
A New Pencil Permission to be a beginner.
Now imagine your older self joining you.
Not a perfect cell.
A human being who has lived more days,
Made choices,
Learned,
James Rest it and begin again.
Ask this older self.
What is worth making a room for now?
Perhaps the answer is creativity.
Perhaps it is courage,
Honesty,
Friendship.
Rest Curiosity of Freedom.
Perhaps the answer is simply.
Listen.
Take up the debt and let that be enough.
Look around this quiet inner room once more.
Imagine one small space becoming clear.
Ajay.
A table.
A window.
A corner.
This is not a place where you have to produce something impressive.
It is a place where you can meet yourself.
Where your thoughts are not immediately drowned out.
Where you can ask what is true,
Where you can notice what you enjoy.
Silently repeat,
If the words feel right.
My feelings.
Are worth listening to.
My Preferences.
Are allowed to matter.
I can let go.
Of what no longer fits.
I can make them.
For what is becoming.
And now,
One final question.
What is One?
Honest.
Gentle steps.
I can take this week.
What is one honest,
Gentle step I can take this week?
If no answer comes,
You have not done anything wrong.
Sometimes the step is to keep listening.
Sometimes it is to write your morning pages tomorrow.
Sometimes it is to spend a little while without outside input.
Sometimes it is to rest.
And bring your attention back to the surface beneath you.
Feel your feet.
Your hands,
Your BD day.
Tickle!
Deep breath in.
Let it go slowly.
You do not need to become someone else to live with integrity.
You can begin.
By being a little more truthful.
A little more curious.
And a little more kind.
Toward the person you already are.
And when you are ready.
If your eyes were closed,
Gently open your eyes.
