Anyone else tired of being broken?
Take a really good breath,
A really deep breath,
And just let yourself settle.
Wherever you are,
Whatever you're holding onto right now,
Just rest with it or without it.
It's no problem.
This isn't a meditation.
It's a spoken piece,
A reflection,
Just a simple moment of truth that I want to share with you.
You,
Whoever you are,
Who's been doing all of the right things and yet still feels broken in some way,
This is for you.
This is for you from me,
From the floor,
From a cushion on the floor,
And not from a stage.
Let's begin.
How many self-help books have you read?
You're on Insight Timer,
Right?
Any other self-help apps?
Did you catch the latest Huberman Lab podcast?
I hope you're getting that magical early morning sunlight.
Don't make me puke.
How much more self-help do we need to fail at before we realize that wellness isn't the answer?
Maybe,
Just maybe,
You're already asking this question.
Are you?
Have you ever caught yourself thinking,
I'm doing everything right,
So why am I still not better?
Who told us we were supposed to get better?
Did they define it?
Did they put it in a manual?
What does better even mean?
I'm still waiting to see.
Where is this manual that tells me exactly what better means?
I heard it meant I should be rich,
Or famous,
Or have a happy family,
Own a home,
Travel a lot,
Or maybe not at all,
But at least have some money in savings.
Are those the signs of wellness?
Not for me.
Not for me.
And if I had to guess,
Not for you either.
We are living in an acid trip,
A total hallucination,
Telling ourselves what better should be and then working our whole damn lives to get there.
But still,
Suffering comes.
There is no eliminating it,
Not in the way we've been told.
So we fool ourselves.
We live according to how we want things to be,
How we wish they were,
How we thought they were supposed to go.
We're dreaming our lives away.
Every day we live in any way other than with the way things actually are.
So how are things?
Things are broken.
Find me something whole.
Seriously,
Prove me wrong.
I'm not here preaching at you.
I'm here inviting you to ask the same questions I've asked myself.
I'm sitting next to you.
You who suffer.
You who eat well,
Meditate,
Do yoga,
Get sunlight,
Take your omega-3s.
I'm in the car,
Riding along the same road to nowhere.
How long have we been looping together on this circular track called wellness,
Costing billions and leaving us just as broken as before?
Why?
Why are we still broken,
Even though we're doing everything right?
You ready for it?
Because the nature of things is pieces.
So again,
Do it.
Find me something whole.
Prove me wrong.
There is not a single thing on this planet that is whole.
If you want to find a flower,
Pull off all the petals,
Slice the stem to pieces,
Examine the roots under a microscope.
Where is the flower to be found?
Nowhere.
The flower is only pieces.
You are only pieces.
Emotions are only pieces.
Everything is only pieces.
And this,
My beautiful friend,
My companion,
My partner,
This is why there is no fixing ourselves.
We can keep trying.
New research,
New science,
New books,
New diets,
New podcasts.
We can do it all,
Babe,
But in the end,
We're going to be just as broken as we were before.
Because all we are is pieces.
And maybe,
Just maybe,
There's freedom in that.
In not being fixed,
But in being exactly as we are,
Broken,
Brilliant,
Unfinished,
Un-whole,
Real.
Thanks for listening.
If this spoke to something in you,
Don't try to fix it.
Just let it land.
Just let it be.
Just feel into it.
