Welcome to the happiness podcast.
I'm Dr.
Robert Puff.
I don't know about you,
But one of my favorite things to do is to explore a beautiful world that we live in.
I like to go to places,
See them,
Get to know the people,
Explore the art,
The architecture,
The history.
There's just so much in life to explore and I really enjoy exploring it and I've made a lot of time and effort for it throughout my life.
But in truth,
This could change.
I could have a health problem.
My finances could change.
Many things could happen that could preclude me from continuing my exploration of the world.
And you know what?
That would be okay.
I remember once years ago,
I had a trip completely planned,
A summer trip.
Everything was pretty much paid for,
But there was a crisis with one of my family members and we weren't able to go that summer and it was okay.
And today I want to talk about the secret thing that we can do to make life go okay,
Even when we can't get out there and explore the world.
And it really boils down to this.
We don't want to necessarily see new places.
We want to have new eyes when we see things.
And that really is one of the secret aspects of happiness.
When we can continue to see things with new eyes,
What will happen is no matter what's happening,
We're going to be in a good place because in a sense we're going to be exploring our world,
Whether we're traveling through Asia or homebound in our bed because we're ill.
It doesn't really matter because if we can keep our eyes fresh,
New,
Then there's always things that we can see that we haven't seen before.
I remember a friend of mine who described one time she was walking to work and she walked this way every day for 10 years and she noticed a new shop had opened and she went in there to ask how long they've been open and they said seven years.
So she'd walked by it for seven years and hadn't noticed it.
We all have probably had that experience where something is new in our lives and we just don't see it or we see things but we really stopped seeing them.
Many,
Many years ago I knew a man that was involved in a movement.
I don't remember what it was called,
But its philosophy was to take a small strip of land,
Very small,
And just really get to know it extremely well.
Every aspect of it,
The animals that live there,
The plants,
The weather that changed throughout the years,
The geography,
Just really instead of exploring the larger world,
Getting to know a small piece of it extremely well.
Another example of this is of art.
If you like art as I do,
You can go to the art museum and see a beautiful piece of art and hopefully if you're passionate about it,
Each time you'll see it,
It will strike you and move your heart and each time you look at it,
You see it in a deeper way.
I mean,
I don't know if you know this,
There are people that get their PhD in the arts and they may do their dissertation,
Which may take them a year or two to do,
Just on one piece of art because they know it so well.
And life is like that.
I know it's wonderful to travel,
But what we really want to cultivate is the ability to see new things with new eyes,
Not necessarily new landscapes,
Because if we do that,
Then if we are ever restrained from our travels,
We're going to go into depression or we probably all know people who,
When they get older and they can't travel anymore,
They really get depressed or if their finances change and they can't go on vacation or they just can't get out anymore,
They get depressed too.
So the way to avoid that is,
Is to see things with new eyes.
And when we do that,
The world just becomes a beautiful place that we live in and that we can explore whether to the four corners of the earth or the four corners of our house,
There's just so many beautiful things that we can explore,
Learn about,
Touch,
Feel,
Smell.
And when we do that,
What will happen is wherever we are,
Whatever we're doing,
Even when we have the desire to do more and see more,
We'll say,
It's okay.
I like what's before me.
I mean,
Think about it with friendships and perhaps our love partner.
If we can keep seeing things with new eyes as our spouse or our partner changes,
We'll love them and continue to be attracted towards them because we're seeing them with new eyes.
And if we,
Again,
For whatever circumstances,
Haven't been able to do much,
But live in a very small town or a small community right now,
That's okay.
People do that and are very happy because they see the beauty all around them.
No matter where we go,
No matter what we do,
There's just always something beautiful to be with.
The story I often share is of a monk who was put in solitary confinement for 10 years.
And when he got out,
He was able to find his fellow monks and tell them how beautiful the light could be going through the window or how beautiful the cockroaches could be that would visit him in his cell.
There's just always something beautiful to be with.
If we remember that we don't have to go out there to see new things,
We can,
But we don't need to.
And I think the great thing about this is when we really develop seeing things with new eyes,
Instead of having to see new things,
Is that when we do get the opportunity or are blessed with the ability to travel and go on vacation,
We'll enjoy it more because now we're seeing it for the first time.
Even if we've been there five times before,
Or even if we've never been there,
Our eyes are wide open with wonderment and we look around and we see so many beautiful things for the first time,
But we're really seeing them.
I think in life,
Because we take things for granted,
That once we see something,
We actually stop seeing it.
There's a wise saying that goes,
Once I've labeled a sparrow,
I never see that sparrow again.
And there's deep wisdom in that saying.
We really are missing out on so much of life when we rush through it or when we assume that we've seen something,
That there's nothing else to be seen.
But if we can develop this skill of seeing things with new eyes,
Then our world,
Instead of being mundane,
Depressing or boring,
Will become beautiful,
Exciting,
And even captivating so that it takes our breath away.
But we have to develop again,
New eyes,
Not new landscapes,
New eyes.
So I want to conclude this podcast with how do we do this?
I mean,
Saying it's one thing,
But doing it can be quite another.
The key of it is,
Is to lose the commentary,
The thoughts,
The thinking in our head that say,
I've seen that,
That's boring.
If we say that,
That's true.
But if we lose that commentary,
Then we see things with new eyes because we're really looking at it in the now.
And in the now,
Nothing stays the same.
There's always more that we can explore or we can have that sensation of just feeling it again.
I mean,
Think of,
If I may,
This may be a little risque,
But think of sex.
I mean,
How many of us have had sex one time and say,
Well,
I've had that before.
Why would I want it again?
We want it again because it was beautiful,
Because it was wonderful.
Well,
What have we made life that way?
But we engage with life in a way that we really experience it at a visceral level where we felt it.
I mean,
One thing that I love are roses.
I know I'm a guy,
But I actually really love the smell of roses.
It's my favorite scent in the planet.
And anytime I go places where there are roses,
I find the ones that smell the most delicious and just take in that scent.
And I love it.
It's wonderful.
And I never get bored by it at all.
So a lot of it is losing the commentary in our head that is telling us that this is boring.
I've seen this.
Let's move on.
And instead just be still,
Just be quiet and take in it for the first time.
Even if you've seen it 20 times before,
Just feel it,
Experience it,
Look at it from different angles,
Turn your head upside down,
Do whatever it takes to really try to see this thing in a new way with new eyes.
And here's,
I want to end with as a very good technique to develop this skill.
I want us to choose a place near our home that we can get to fairly easily on a regular basis and go there over and over and over again.
Now,
For example,
It could be a garden,
It could be a park,
It could be a museum,
But somewhere that you find is truly beautiful and then go there.
I wouldn't recommend a place where there's a lot of activity or things that we can do,
Like say an amusement park.
It's more of a place where we can be like at a park or at a lake where we can be still,
Be quiet,
And allow our eyes to see the newness each time we go there.
One of the places that I go to over and over again here in Southern California is a place called Huntington Gardens and Library.
It is a place that I would highly recommend anyone to go to if you ever visit Southern California.
It has both beautiful gardens and beautiful artwork from around the world.
It's a place that I've been going to for years,
Literally,
And every time I go there,
And I try to go there often because I'm a member,
And it is somewhere I can get to in a day and back.
So I go there and I allow myself just to be and to see with new eyes.
Sometimes I bring people with me so I can see it through their eyes.
Sometimes I'm just walking and watching others what they see.
Sometimes I just allow myself to be still and to really see what's there.
There's a lot to see when we slow down,
But we need to have a place that we go to and keep going to,
Perhaps for the rest of our lives.
Somebody's close,
So if finances or health slow down,
We can still get there.
But by learning that we have our place that we go to,
And we really are able to see new things each time we go,
Then we're going to lose that fear,
That fear that may be creeping in the back of our mind saying,
What if I can't do this someday?
What if I can't get out?
What if things change and I can't explore the world anymore?
At the deepest point of our soul,
We'll know it doesn't matter because we are seeing things with new eyes.
And by doing that,
There'll be no more jealousy of others when they post things of where they've been.
There'll be no more fear of not being able to travel in the future because we know that no matter what happens,
The world will always present us with beauty because our eyes are able to see things new.
And with our new eyes,
The world will always be beautiful,
Always accessible,
And always there for us so that no matter what's happening,
We know we can go explore our world with our new eyes.
Thank you for joining me on the Happiness Podcast.
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And until next time,
Accept what is,
Love what is.
