I'll be Nivesa.
Which translates to clinging.
And let me begin with something simple.
Have you ever noticed how we tend to hold on.
To hold on to moments.
To hold on to people,
To hold on to identities.
Even when we know that they are changing.
Our conversation ends.
And we replay it in our mind.
A phase of life shifts.
And we wish that it would stay.
We wish things would just stay like that.
A version of ourself fades.
And we resist.
Not loudly.
But quietly.
Almost instinctively.
There is something in us that simply doesn't want things to end.
In yoga.
This deep.
Instinctive Holding is called Abhinivesa.
In the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali and this comes up in Chapter 2 in the 3rd Sutra.
It goes like,
Avidya,
Asmita,
Raga,
Dvesa,
Abhinivesa,
Glesa.
And these are the five afflictions.
And then he goes a bit specific a few lines later.
He goes a bit more specific and he describes Abhinivesa as this fear of loss,
This clinging of life that is deeply ingrained in everyone,
Even in the wise.
Abhinivesa is often described as the fear of death.
But more subtly,
It is the fear of losing what we identify with.
Not just physical life.
But losing control.
Losing Identity.
Losing Certainty Losing what feels familiar.
If we look back,
We started first with Avidya.
And avidya is miss seeing,
We miss see.
Then we have Asmita.
Asmita is when we become the identity,
When the ego takes over.
Then we have Raga which is attachment where we cling to what we like.
Then we looked at Dwesha.
Dvesha is aversion,
When we push away what we don't like,
What we are not comfortable with.
And then underneath all of this,
Underneath avidya,
Asmita,
Raga and dvesa,
There is this quiet feel.
What happens if this goes away?
Abhinivesa shows up when you hold on to a version of yourself even when you've outgrown it.
Or you stay in something because letting go feels uncertain.
Or you resist change even when you know that it's needed.
Or even more subtly.
When you try to control life,
To keep things as they are.
Abhinivesa is not fear itself.
It is the clinging that comes from fear.
And the interesting part is that everything that we are trying to hold is already changing.
Because life is movement.
Breath is movement.
Experience is movement.
And the more we try to hold it still,
The more tension we create.
Right now,
At this moment.
Notice the bread.
You cannot hold the inhale forever.
And you cannot stop the exhale.
And yet,
There is a rhythm,
There is a natural letting go that's happening every time we are breathing,
Every time we are taking a breath.
There's this natural letting go that's happening.
So this practice.
Is not about removing fear.
Fear may arise.
Fear may still arise.
The invitation is to trust.
The movement of life.
To allow what comes and what goes without clinging.
Thank you for listening.
