Your loneliness longs for you.
I know,
You're probably thinking,
No,
No.
I am lonely.
I need a person.
Understand that.
Loneliness is such a distinct.
.
.
Pain.
It's so profoundly human and beautiful.
And It hurts.
A way that you can help loneliness.
Is to think about yourself as a whole person with many parts.
So a part of you is lonely.
A lot of times,
The lonely.
Is a child inside.
And what I mean by that is in here,
In the inner world,
The psyche,
Subconscious.
There is no time.
So what you felt as a little child,
Alone.
Overlooked.
Abandoned,
An outsider,
Whatever that pain was.
That child is still there inside you.
Very real.
Not seen by anyone from the outside.
And yet.
.
.
Absolutely.
Feeling exactly that loneliness.
Maybe.
.
.
As an adult,
You look back and you think,
Oh,
No,
It wasn't that bad.
That's just a kid.
I'm over it.
I'm past it.
But not for the child part.
Who feels what he or she or they feel,
And that's their emotional reality.
Imagine your inner world like a house.
And among your parts,
There is this child.
Feeling such loneliness.
And in that house,
The child runs to the front door.
Every time someone comes along.
Anyone.
Flinging the front door open,
Hoping that that person is gonna be the one to really see them.
Hold them.
Love them exactly as they are.
Make them feel safe and cherished.
There's the longing.
So this child.
.
.
Is running to the front door for anybody.
Opening the front door to the Big Bad Wolf.
Hoping.
That the wolf will love it.
And meanwhile,
All along.
In the kitchen?
The place of nourishment.
There's your soul,
The you that's not a part,
Your core,
Whatever you want to call it.
It's the source of your healing.
And it's not a part.
So there it is with all of the unconditional love nourishment.
That the child really needs.
That may sound nice,
But.
.
.
How do you go in,
Find your child?
And encourage them away from the front door.
Toward you.
We can do it right now just for a minute so you can get a feel briefly for what it's like to go inside.
So get comfortable.
Close your eyes if you want to.
And slow your breathing down.
Wade.
Just staying with it.
Noticing how Your breath is right there.
Always.
Supporting you.
Allow it to support you now.
On your next inhale,
Allow your breath to pull you in to the inner world.
Just notice what that's like.
To the inside.
Ask.
Who is lonely?
Notice.
Maybe a thought is there.
Body sensation,
An image.
A memory.
Maybe an entity,
A character?
Whatever.
Your experiences.
Stay with it.
Feel the space.
Between you and the lonely that you're seeing.
That you're noticing.
You might even let the lonely get a good look at you.
There you are.
And for now,
That's the beginning.
It's all that's needed.
When you're ready,
Take a nice deep breath and open your eyes back out.
So there was the loneliness.
And you can be there for it.
If you want to spend more focused time with this lonely child,
Use the meditation that will allow you to find this part spend some time with it.
And help it.
That kind of inner work can do a lot.
To ease those feelings of loneliness and the impact they have in the moment.
Because you have this experience.
Of really tending to the part of you that needs Attention.
That needs someone to show up.
And really be there.
Try this.
Next time you feel lonely.
Maybe you're out in the world.
Maybe you're hanging out with a bunch of people.
Or you can feel lonely with people,
Right?
Maybe you're in line at the grocery store or you're at home.
Whatever it is,
Notice the loneliness.
Take a slow breath.
And with your eyes open,
Use your peripheral vision.
To see the lonely right there beside you.
Feel it there.
Feel how it matters.
This lonely one.
And if it feels right,
Hold it.
With your mind,
Put your arm around it.
I got you.
Just that.
See what that's like.
Your lonely is not alone anymore.
