We begin and end with breath.
Breathe in,
Hold.
Continue a rhythm that feels good in your body.
Sitting or laying with your eyes closed or just diffused if that feels better.
Just noticing and bringing your awareness to your breath as it enters and exits your body.
Noticing the temperature of the air as it enters through your nose and how it's changed as it exits through your mouth.
Noticing the rise of your chest and the fall as you exhale.
And now deepening so that when you inhale the breath goes all the way to the bottom of your lungs.
Feeling the rise of your belly as you inhale and expand to capacity.
And then hold there at the top and then breathe in once again.
Noticing your exhale is longer than your inhale.
Noticing the relief of inhale and exhale when we hold and expand and contract.
Now bring your awareness to your body.
If there's any part of you that needs to shift or change or soften to be more relaxed,
Do so.
Noticing if you're holding tension anywhere in your body,
Just give it one more degree of relaxation.
Just softening just that little bit more.
Feeling your body sink a little bit deeper into the floor or the chair.
Noticing where you connect to the ground,
Whether it's your feet or your back of your body if you're laying.
Noticing how solid and safe you are in that connection.
How the earth is below you,
Even if it's through concrete,
Through flooring,
Through chairs and couches and softness.
The earth is there and rooted and anchored in safety.
Allow any part of your body that is holding tension to receive your breath.
Envisioning your inhalation,
Breathing in beautiful universal light into any place that's hard or painful or tight and allowing it to soften on your exhale.
Letting any of that to just release and go.
Until your whole body feels like it's filled with light,
Beautiful,
Pure.
Let your mind's eye open.
See yourself in a clearing under a dark midnight sky.
It is winter.
It is a winter solstice.
There is no moon to be seen and yet you can see so well in the light of the stars.
They are everywhere as you look up.
It is the only light here and they are brilliant.
They are vast and they take up the entire sky above you.
They reflect off the snow and there is a silhouette of the ancient trees in the far,
Far away around the clearing.
And it is so quiet,
The quietest that you've ever experienced.
The hush of winter.
Look down at your feet.
Stamp your feet on the ground.
Feel what kind of clothing,
Whether they're robes or furs or many layers because it is quite cold here.
But you aren't suffering.
You're warm inside your clothing.
You feel good about being here,
About standing here in this quiet.
And the sound of your feet in the snow,
That crunch,
Is so loud against the quiet.
There is something between here.
You feel on the threshold.
You notice there is another light flickering far in the distance across the plane of the clearing and up and into what may be a hill.
It's hard to see from here,
But that flickering just here and then gone calls you.
You know you have been called here to follow that call,
That longing inside your soul.
Perhaps there is a path in front of you or maybe you have to break ground across this snowy landscape.
There is effort to be made and given to follow this light,
To follow this tiny,
Tiny flicker.
This deep longing.
You make your way and you feel yourself sweating inside your robes,
Your clothes,
Your furs.
It is hard,
But it's worth it.
And over the plane you walk,
Trudging through the snow,
The loud sound of you crunching the snow against the stillness.
Eventually,
You find yourself at the bottom of this hill.
You can see that there's quite a steep incline and you've been trudging through the snow and you're hot and you're tired and you're breathing heavy and there's puffs of that breath you can see in the cold air.
You're tired,
But that flicker,
That flicker is still there.
And so,
You gather your strength and you trudge up the hill.
This steep incline is calling you to work,
To provide effort if you want to find this treasure,
This call.
And up and up and up you walk and you climb until eventually,
Eventually,
You find yourself at the top of the hill and there you see that there is an opening surrounded by stone.
It is not a big opening.
It is a cave into the hill and it's been ceremoniously created and held by the stonework of hands that are so ancient they have been forgotten.
It is just big enough for you to crouch down and move into and you see that there is a long passage and you must crouch,
Possibly even crawl and wiggle your way through this passage.
But that light,
That light is still calling you,
It's still flickering and it's getting brighter as you work your way through this passage.
And all of a sudden,
Finally,
Finally,
The walls start to expand and there's more space and more room and you start to see that brilliant light instead of a flicker,
It becomes illuminating.
And here it opens up into the cavern,
The cavern of the crone,
The cave of the crone,
The winter goddess,
The grandmother of all grandmothers.
And she is here and she is waiting by her sacred fire,
Her hearth and her cauldron.
And here she turns to see you and you feel the weight of those eyes that have seen everything,
That bring the winter,
That bring the freeze,
She who cuts away what is no longer needed,
She who manifests in the deep dreams.
She is here to meet with you and she calls you forth and this is not an easy thing.
You must be willing,
You must be ready to come into her presence.
There will be an offering somewhere on you that symbolizes something deep,
Something true and worthy of her and you will give it to her before she will give you what you are here to hear.
She will tell you what you need to hear at this time of the solstice.
What is in her cauldron that speaks your name in the coming year and what is here for you.
Gently return to your body.
Take your time,
Do not rush.
Feel into coming back into this form,
Feeling the heaviness,
Bringing your awareness to the physical of your existence.
You can begin with just sensing where your body meets the ground or the chair,
Feeling the blanket or anything that is on you to keep you warm.
Bringing your awareness to this place and this space,
Wiggling toes,
Wiggling fingers.
Before coming back with your eyesight,
Just take moments of return.
When you're ready,
Go ahead and sit up,
Stretch,
Open your eyes,
Fully engage in this space and time.
Pick up your journal and your pen and try to just record and scribe everything you remember without editing,
Without worry.
Anything that makes sense or organizing.
Journey is like dreams,
We marry it to the physical so that it will stay.
If you feel moved or if it calls for it,
Move into art as a response.
Blessings.
