Our Egos Love Boxes

It's like you're in a box and you know that and you're scared to really come out of it but you're feeling the pain of being in it increasingly.

Yeah and for you like it's you it's like you you really think your whole life will be jeopardized if you come out of the box and you you won't be it won't be you can keep your job you can you can just keep going the thing is Premasutra will be standing back from you as long as you don't want to come out of this box because I've learned I've learned so we might as well how are you doing with there are you feeling about that well self-pity really I mean I think that's yeah I want to believe I love the idea of oneness I love the idea of him being with me all the time you know I love the idea of all of us being with each other all the time but I don't feel it and no yeah so just for everybody there is you know it was Jenna's dog and I got there actually communicated with me and he told me that he really wanted to come back and be with Jenna again and this made total sense to me because it's sort of the thing that would actually prove to Jenna that God exists and these big quantum leaps are possible right it's kind of like it's sort of like my son's healing from leukemia it's like I don't know that anything else could have got through to me it's like if you get another dog or when you get another dog and you perceive it's bear which I feel bear is coming back to you this will be okay this stuff is really true yeah because I think otherwise you're you're just kind of gonna do somersaults in your head all the time you need kind of some big proof that you can go well that happened like I did with the leukemia it go like well that happened it looks like God doesn't exist right now but that happened so I'll keep trusting no and I I think that's I'm having difficulty with compassion for myself because I see I I guess I'm asking how much proof does one need because I do feel like I have I see it and I do feel like I've had proof and you know and yet I really you know feel this bog in my body so I'm just trying to be with it because yeah this is coming up to be cleared sweetie right you know them right yeah yeah