Hello.
Welcome everyone.
Today's topic is Toxic Relationships and Meditation.
Ramdas said,
If you think you're enlightened,
Go spend a week with your family.
Have you experienced this perhaps over the holidays where you think you're in a calm,
Serene space,
But as soon as you're presented with the opportunity of connecting with certain members of your families or loved ones,
You find yourself getting triggered,
Angry,
Emotionally charged.
It can be really hard to settle ourselves when we are engaged in toxic situations.
When we are in difficult,
Unhealthy relationships,
It can distort your sense of reality and negatively impact your mind.
It can cause mental turmoil.
It often causes anxiety and it can even make you sick,
Physically sick.
And we've all had these encounters of dealing with difficult,
Unreasonable people and feeling deeply challenged in applying our spiritual practice to relationships that are some people call karmic or intense.
Just really difficult.
And when you think about it,
Meditation and toxicity,
It would seem that they don't really go together because they're in two different zones.
If you're in a toxic situation,
The last thing you want to do is close your eyes and let go because what you really need to go deep into meditation is a sense of safety and security.
When we're in toxic situations,
We feel anxious.
We're on edge.
We are hyper alert,
Hyper vigilant because we feel the need to protect ourselves.
We don't know if we're going to be harmed emotionally,
Physically in some way.
So that need to protect and guard our sense of wellbeing,
We might just want to scream instead of meditate.
That might be the more appropriate thing.
Because as I mentioned,
What's needed to foster a strong spiritual practice is the sense of sacred,
Safe space,
A place where you feel safe to relax,
Safe to close your eyes and let go,
Go deep within yourself.
And what happens when we're in toxic connections,
Or maybe we're at home or we're at the workplace where we're being faced with having to deal with the same relationships again and again,
Maybe it's a client,
Maybe it's a coworker.
What can we do to create moments of sacred space for ourselves?
Because when we're in these toxic situations,
Meditation can feel far away,
That sense of peace,
That sense of transcendence.
It can feel inaccessible,
Almost impossible to experience that because we're in such a different zone.
We've been pulled down into a really dense,
Sticky place that's filled with fear.
Maybe there's political dynamics.
Maybe you have to walk on eggshells,
Whatever it may be,
Because you're fearing the overreaction of others and what could potentially happen or go wrong.
Meditation can feel like not something you can really do.
It doesn't even feel like something that can be helpful.
And not only that,
You can feel completely uninspired to meditate because you don't have that feeling of security.
So this is something to be really aware of if you're leading meditation,
Teaching that,
You know,
Just the practical knowing that if somebody is in an abusive or toxic or unhealthy situation,
How hard it can be for people to even want to try to meditate,
To have that space.
Because that's really a kind of privilege to be in a situation where you have a peaceful,
Quiet place where you can focus inwardly.
Because toxicity really draws your attention outward.
It takes you external.
So in finding these little moments of peace,
However you can,
Whether it's going into your car and finding those moments of peace in your car or going outside,
Taking a walk,
Going to a park,
Finding your own moments of solace where you can re-center,
Regroup,
Regather your own life force energy that might have felt just split apart and broken and in so many different directions.
Because we can feel really scattered and out of sorts and just not like ourselves when we're having to engage and be,
Live or work in toxic situations.
So it's important to learn how to adapt our practice to serve us in challenging situations and to draw upon even past practice that we might've had or,
You know,
Find a way to resource ourselves.
And that it's okay to have little moments.
And I think the last thing you ever want to do,
If you're in a really crazy,
Dramatic situation is beat yourself up for not meditating enough.
Because like I said,
It can be really difficult to shift into that vibration of meditation when you're dealing in a situation that requires more of your attention and energy.
So while meditation can be really helpful and help you navigate,
Respond skillfully in these toxic situations,
It's okay to just draw upon moments of peace for yourself in your own way.
Thank you so much for listening to today's talk.
Blessings.
