Getting Vulnerable On Teaching

06:52

06:52

Getting Vulnerable On Teaching

by Caitlin Lojo

Rated

5

Type

talks

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

Plays

10

This is a talk on how I came to be a teacher on Insight Timer. During this exploration, I share about my therapy journey and how I grew to find myself and my voice, and then express that voice. I get vulnerable about being divorced and having to spend time away from my kiddo. I hope that my sharing my story helps you see yourself in a new light. Imposter Syndrome is a real struggle that so many people encounter on their life path. Hopefully this offers some encouragement to aid in your own internal battles.

Personal Growth Imposter Syndrome Therapy Community Affirmations Art Therapy Neurodivergent Community Support

Meet your Teacher

Hudson Valley, NY, USA

Meet your Teacher

Hudson Valley, NY, USA

Transcript

Hi and welcome in. I'm Caitlin. I am a mindful crochet artist in the Hudson Valley, New York. I would like to get a little vulnerable today and share a bit of a backstory with you. I would like to share how I came to be a teacher here on Insight Timer. I never fancied myself as a teacher before. It is still a bit of a sore spot or a shadow that I need to embrace. When I worked in the retail and food industries, I was always relied on to provide training. The newbies looked to me for guidance and the higher-ups trusted that I would do the leading. The responsibility felt taxing. That is not the point of this story, Just a little extra nugget of flavor. I had spent quite some time on BetterHelp as a patient, Utilizing the group therapies and classes they had for support, In addition to my regular therapist meetings. The art therapy groups in particular were very helpful. It unlocked something in me that the talking and journaling and verbal processing alone could not do. It was something more expressive and somatic for me. Then, Somewhere along the way, I remembered my love of crochet. I became inspired and picked up my hooks and yarn again. Eventually, I found my crochet community and my world widened and brightened even more. So, I utilized the art therapy and the talk groups and the individual therapy and my crochet. And, As I slowly unburdened myself of some of the things I was holding in my unconscious mind and really forgave past perceived hurts, I came into myself more and more. Most of the therapists started to good-naturedly rib me about running my own groups. They were always impressed with my intros and how I shared what I have learned along my journey and how I integrate things so I can live my best life and be my best self. I would share about how mindfulness is my jam and how I make tasks sacred and ritualistic for myself. I would share about meditations and my take on the process, Especially being neurodivergent with bipolar and PMDD and anxiety. I shared my feelings and experiences around codependency, As well as my perfectionism and possible obsessive-compulsive disorder. I am happy and quite proud to say these things are under control now and mostly left behind me. Sometimes they crop up when an insecurity arises, But they are way more manageable for me now. So yes, These therapists first-hand saw how I had learned and grown and integrated, So they encouraged me to use my voice, Which is a difficult button for me as well. Hence the practice I am doing here and now, Writing and sharing this. I found Insight Timer after multiple therapists recommended the app over and over. Finally, I downloaded it and gave it a shot. I was enamored. There are so many amazing things to explore, Teachers and courses and lives, Oh my! It is beyond anything I could have imagined. One day, When I was exploring the website, I stumbled upon the teacher application. This was divine timing for me. When I found this information and link, My kiddo had been on a vacation with her dad. Now, Her dad and I are divorced. So this was a tender time. This vacation happened to be the longest stretch of time kiddo and I were away from one another. I missed my girl. I was using my affirmations daily, Multiple times a day. I was writing them out and playing with different combinations of words and phrases. I had even toyed with recording them so I could hear myself say them in my other voice, In addition to the voice I hear on the regular. You know that voice I am talking about. How one hears oneself versus how others hear one. So, I was playing with affirmations. A lot. I had overcome lots of things and hardships and negative thinking. I decided to apply. I figured, Why not? The worst that could happen is they tell me no. And what does that hurt? Nothing. I am in the same position I started in, So what does it matter? So I gave it a shot. And sure enough, I was accepted and approved. I became a teacher on Insight Timer. Yay! I became really vulnerable then. I posted my affirmation meditations for the world to listen to and possibly critique and not like. It was quite a big deal for me. But it was an amazing experience. A great amount of learning occurred and is still ongoing. I love to learn, Which is helpful. I made a lot of friends on Insight Timer along the way. At one point, My one friend, Melanie Underwood, Pretty much dared me to start doing live events, Too. She suggested crocheting with friends. And that idea kind of sold me. However, I felt I needed content pertaining to said proposed lives. So I got to work writing. I wrote out the track, Combining Crochet and Meditation. And then I worked on my Lives application video. I had a few technical things to work out. But as soon as I figured that out, I scripted my video. In this video, I shared about how I absolutely love and adore my internet crochet community and how I have grown as a person from the connections and how I wanted to bring that joy and love and wonder and creativity to Insight Timer. And I was approved. And the crochet circle was born. I have a new and evolved vision of where I want the circle to go, Though. Going forward, I will be hosting a crochet and creativity collective where everybody is welcome. I will bring along one of the many projects on my hooks and friends are welcome to show up as they are wherever they may fall or feel they think they fall on the creativity spectrum. I welcome you to come check a creativity collective out when it is convenient for you. Thank you so much for your presence and for listening to all of this. Blessings, And I am sending you so much love.