
No One's Thinking About You And That's A Liberating Thing
by Boom Shikha
We can spend so much of our time worrying about what others are thinking about us, but what if they aren't actually thinking of you at all? What if they are too busy with their own problems, and in their own head?
Transcript
Hello everyone,
I hope that you guys are doing amazing where you are in the world.
My name is Bhoomshakha and I welcome you to my channel.
As always I'm so grateful that you're listening,
Subscribing and commenting.
I really appreciate the support.
In this one I want to speak to you about feeling embarrassed.
I know a lot of us,
Especially if you're an INFJ,
Spend a lot of our time worrying about something that we did 3,
000 years ago that no one remembers.
But we remember that we did this and we think everyone is thinking about us and thinking that we did it and laughing at us,
Pointing at us or you know making fun of us.
And we spend hours and hours cringing over it and thinking over it and not being able to sleep because of it.
And I just wanted to do a video on this because I saw a post recently talking about this particular thing and I think it has to do a lot with social anxiety,
Being in an INFJ,
Being a socially anxious,
Overthinking,
Crazy person.
And I use crazy in a funny way so don't even start with me because a lot of people have been messaging me saying very weird things about that stuff.
Anyways,
The reason I wanted to do this video was because I wanted to emphasize the fact that people are not thinking of you as much as you are thinking of what you've done.
Just think about yourself for a moment and think about how often do you think of someone else?
How often do you think of even your own mother or even someone that you love?
Even your own partner?
How often do you think of what they're doing or how they're living or what they're thinking or things like that?
You know,
Very often most of the time what we're thinking about as individuals,
As human beings,
Because we're obsessed with ourselves,
Because we are so self-centered,
Is that we're thinking about ourselves.
We're thinking about what other people thought of us.
We're thinking about what we did here or there and what someone else saw that us doing here or there.
We're not really thinking about someone else.
We're thinking about ourselves in that context of that other person's thinking.
So in general,
If you yourself are not thinking about that,
About anyone else at all and you are an over-thinker,
Can you imagine most people who are not over-thinkers,
Who don't think about anything besides what food they're going to eat next or what movie they're going to watch next,
Can you imagine them thinking at all about you?
It's not really even happening.
Most people are not thinking about you,
Not spending any time thinking about you,
Not spending any time talking about you.
You're not as special or as on top of their mind as you think you are.
This is such a really important message to learn,
Not because it makes us feel terrible that,
Oh my god no one's thinking about me and I'm not special and I'm just a nobody and etc.
Not in that way of course,
But to think about it this way where no one's thinking of you,
So you can do whatever you want with your life because no one gives a rat's ass.
You can live your life the way you want to.
You can go and choose the job that you want to.
You can choose the husband or wife or the partner that you want to.
You can choose your homosexuality.
You can be homosexual or heterosexual,
Or whatever you want to.
You can choose your sexuality because no one's thinking about you.
You can move to any country in the world because no one's thinking about you.
You can do whatever you want because no one is thinking about you.
Your life being your authentic true self because no one is thinking about you yeah most of us the reason we don't live our true authentic selves or true lives that we really want to live most of the time I think one of the main reasons because we worry what other people are gonna think what will they say what will she say what will he say this is something that my mom says all the time to me as well what will they say and like I don't know they won't say anything they're too busy thinking about their own damn self they're too busy thinking about their own stuff they worry about someone else and most cases 99.
9 percent of the cases that's true really true most people are not thinking about you they're not thinking about what you're doing what you're saying what your what your life is all about they're way too busy thinking about all the things that they're worrying about about themselves about their own things what's going on with their belly why is it getting bigger or smaller or why is their hair getting thinner and things like that you know there's so much to worry about everyone has their own things to worry about they don't have time to think about you and so this is a liberating moment in this it was a liberating moment for me particularly when I realized no one cares no one's thinking about me except perhaps my mother and she loves me so it's okay but besides that perhaps no one really cares no one wants to know what I'm doing no one really wants to wants to talk about it no one is thinking about me and so I can do whatever I want I can live the life I want I can go where I want I can do what I want because no one gives a shit right this is really important for a lot of us because we're over thinkers and we pretend or we imagine that someone else is actually thinking about us they're actually talking about it they're actually wondering about us it's not true it's not happening and so you can live your life the way you want to now thinking about embarrassing things that you might have done you know a lot of times we're sitting there thinking oh my god I did something embarrassing and there must still be talking about it and they still probably remember it they don't remember it they forgot about it a second after that happened because some other thought about something else more prominent in their life took over their head and this happens every single time to you as well think about the last time you saw something embarrassing happened to someone else perhaps they fell on the ground the last time I saw something embarrassing happened to someone they fell on the ice it was icy or snowy in Canada and Toronto and I was visiting as walking past this person and they fell on the ice and I haven't thought about it since I started doing this video and I was like when was the last time I remember someone doing something embarrassing and that person's face that they're who they were I have no idea I just remember that they did it and I'm no idea who they are I can't remember I couldn't point them in a crowd and so of course they might still be thinking about it they might still be like oh my god this person saw me fall but me myself I have no idea who they are right and so they might be torturing themselves over something that the person doesn't even remember I don't even know who it was right and the same thing applies to your embarrassing stories you are not gonna remember it perhaps in a few years maybe you remember it right now but in a few years it won't matter maybe it will maybe you won't but in general to every single person who saw you doing that embarrassing thing they forgot about it ten minutes after you did it five minutes two seconds after you did it it does not matter to them they're not thinking about it they're not talking about it they're not making fun of you they're not even they don't remotely care about you they have way too many other things to worry about not withstanding the coronavirus incident or the pandemic or face masks masks or baking or all other stuff that's going on in their head they always have something that's going on in their head they might be worrying about money you're worrying about the fact that perhaps they're not as attractive to the opposite sex anymore or they might be worrying about what they're gonna eat next or they might be worrying about I don't know a hundred thousand other things besides the fact that you did something embarrassing this is really the most important thing that you guys a lot of you have to understand is because a lot of you messaged me saying exactly the same thing that oh my god I did something like this and I can't believe I did this and this person probably hates me for it and I can assure you unless you did something terribly crazy like stabbing their mother in the face or I don't know like murder or something inane like pouring ice water over them in in front of a crowd or I don't know something really really embarrassing like something that like I don't know I that it really matters most things don't matter which is like 99% of the issue that most people think that everything matters but most things don't so unless you do something crazy crazy crazy crazy that person's not gonna remember what you did they just don't and you also need to forget about it and forget about the fact that this person remembers in fact you can just do an experiment ask that person about it and you can kind of prod and poke and be like do you remember when I did this and I bet you 90% of time or more they're gonna like what no I don't remember when was that when was that when did you do that man I talked to my sister about things that have happened in my childhood and now in our childhood and he was like do you remember when we did this and she like no I have no idea most people don't remember and this is my sister she spent my entire life with me she still doesn't remember things that we've done together so if she's not gonna remember I mean come on there's definitely no way that an embarrassing so you guys gonna be kept by some random stranger off the street or even a friend or an acquaintance right people don't have time to think about these things they are busy thinking about other useless things so they don't have time to worry or think about you again as I said this is a liberating thing it's not a negative thing it's actually a great thing which means you can live your life the way you want to no one's thinking about you no one's judging you no one's thinking that you're a crazy person or a fool or whatever might be so do what you want do you want to open that flower shop then go ahead and open it no one's gonna say that your pansy for opening it up if you're a male or a female it doesn't matter and if you want to go and start writing comics or start writing anime then go ahead and do that you know whatever you want to do with your life go ahead and do it because no one gives a rat's ass in a good way that's actually a very positive thing and you have nothing to worry about in that regard you can just relax and let it let go and let it happen right now I really want you guys to take this as a positive thing a lot of you are like well and if nothing matters I could just kill myself that's not the point you've been given this gift of life you're here let's make the best of it you know you've been given this awesome gift you're alive you can see you can move you can see that the rain falling you can see the sun shining you can feel the Sun on your skin you can feel the breeze on your skin so many beautiful things in this world despite what's going going on in the world and you have been given the opportunity to feel and and be alive in this moment in time so why not take advantage of it you'll be gone soon enough why I make it faster than it's supposed to be be here for the few moments that you're here enjoy it take you know take solace in the fact that the universe thought you were important enough to put on the planet and she or he or it went through a lot of trouble to put you here so enjoy these few moments take your time have fun with it do your thing don't worry about anyone else because no one's thinking about you you can just do whatever you want and then move on because again as I said no one's thinking about you right I hope this makes sense I'm not hopefully doing this video in order to be negative hopefully you'll take it as a positive spin because that's how I take it is that's a positive thing that I can literally live my life the way I want to and that's what I've been doing because no one gives a rat's ass and it's just so liberating and so freeing because I'm free to live my life the way I want to live it on my terms no one is allowed to say anything no one wants to say anything no one cares to say anything and I'm free to do what I want all right I hope that this makes sense to you guys I really want you to get this it's so important to get it because so many of you are not living full lives because you're thinking about things that you've done in the past embarrassing things that you might have done in the past or that you might do in the future and no one is thinking about and you're wasting your life away thinking about things that no one cares about I hope this makes sense again if you guys have any questions comment below and I shall do a follow-up video and I shall see you guys next time around bye for now
