Hello and welcome to five minutes in nature with me Liz Scott on another blustery March day.
It's cloudy,
Grey and damp and we've had quite a lot of rain so as I gradually walk up this lane that takes me up onto Dartmoor you might be able to hear the gush of the stream beside me.
It's quite full of water and today whilst it's not raining right at the moment we've had some really heavy downpours.
I've been in the house and the rain has rattled against the window.
It's almost been like somebody has been banging against the window trying to come in.
It's quite alarming so I'm really hoping I don't get caught in one of those downpours of rain as I walk up towards Dartmoor.
And you know the rain today and the weather today is quite representative of my mood.
I'm planning a pilgrimage.
I've told you about this a couple of times and it's going to be starting in the next week or so and I'm just getting to a stage now where I'm feeling real pangs of unsettled thinking about it.
For quite a while every time I've thought about it I felt a good settled feeling and I've been grounded.
I've just been checking out whether it's the right thing to do and it feels right and I've been listening in to my inner compass as I reflect on the journey ahead.
But today it's different.
Today I feel a bit like those gusty heavy rain showers that have been coming in and battering against my windows because today I feel unsettled.
And I thought I'd speak to you as I feel unsettled because it's so easy sometimes to imagine that if I'm a teacher here on Insight Timer that I have my life sorted.
But the truth is I'm just human and I experience a range of emotions,
The same range of emotions as most people.
And I thought if you could understand that it's okay to feel these emotions and for me it's okay to feel these emotions and what happens for me when I do get these unsettled feelings then it might be helpful to you.
So today as I was reflecting on the walk and I was starting to think about all the things I still need to do and my husband who's going to be helping me and supporting me by picking me up and he's got a camper van and we're going to,
I'm going to rely on him for quite a lot of support during this walk.
My husband started to ask me questions about his role and what he had to do and suddenly the enormity of it all hit me.
It's like what am I doing?
I'm going to go away for weeks at a time.
I'm walking what will be hundreds of miles.
I'm relying on him and he's having to make sacrifices in order to support me and what about our elderly dog and will our dog be okay?
And can you just imagine all these unsettled thoughts and worries and anxieties that just rushed into my mind?
And here's what I know for sure.
I just know it and I know it in my bones.
Is that I know not to trust these feelings.
I know not to trust this real pull to get busy and active and trying to solve all these problems because I know that the answer doesn't lie in that rush of activity and unsettled action which comes from unsettled thinking.
I know that the only thing for me to do is to settle my mind,
Is to bring my attention within and to find that deep sense of grounding again.
That's all I have to do and as you hear the wind in the trees above me blowing hard you can probably tell that it's a blustery old day that I'm walking in this lane and I just know as the wind blows through the trees all I need to do is keep my feet firmly on the ground and take one step at a time.
I know when it's windy and rainy that I might get blown,
My hair might get blown and it might be hard walking and I know that I might get wet but I also know all I need to do is keep going,
Keep looking within and keep finding that space of grounded love,
That space of knowing,
That space of presence within because it's from that space I can navigate my way through the world and so can you.
