May we just be drowned in grace.
May you,
This week,
Feel Amma,
The Creator,
The grace surrounding your lives more than you ever have.
Everything I'm going to be talking about today is to help open you to this grace,
To help open your minds so that you can feel this grace.
Because we're in it,
Like the fissure in the seed.
We're made out of it.
And when we get this,
We feel lighter and happier.
Okay,
So may it really come in strongly,
At the highest good pace,
In the highest good way,
With great thanks and reverence to Amma,
The Creator,
All the beings who are helping us.
So it is.
Okay,
So I truly feel we are in an acceleration.
It's probably all over the world.
It's certainly available to people in this group.
I just really want to,
It's kind of like throw down the gauntlet,
Really spell it out,
Because I'm getting this data very strongly.
And you're going to notice that there's a change in the satsangs and also the power of the satsangs.
We all go together and we're all growing.
Yeah.
So last week,
I talked about the space-time continuum,
Which is seen as a block.
And with our lives in it,
As passages through time,
And that's called a wormhole in physics,
With set beginning and a set ending that our astrology reflects.
Okay,
Einstein also described space and time as the fabric,
The fabric of space and time,
Which is more how the Rishis saw it.
And when I talk about a tapestry,
And the dark threads of our ego get rewoven in gold as we go through these spiritual challenges.
We have our challenges and we allow the darkness within us to lift.
We allow our ego to die.
And our perception then is freed and we see more light.
And you can imagine a golden thread being woven into your tapestry.
And the more gold threads there are,
The more light you see.
And you've earned it through going through these challenges.
Okay,
So just hear this.
And if you really want the penny to drop more,
Listen to it again and again,
Maybe.
And I'll be putting videos up that are spelling this out too.
It's really important,
You guys,
To keep your mind flexible,
So you've got different ways of thinking of the same thing.
It allows the penny to drop in a broader,
Deeper way.
You know,
The whole space-time block,
I mean,
This actually reflects us boxing things too.
We box our experience with our heads.
And this is what I find the biggest obstacle in speaking to you,
In transmitting this.
Yeah,
Because I'm actually aiming it at your heart.
Because your heart gets it.
It gets why you're here,
What you're to do.
Your heart totally gets physics in the simplest way.
That's it.
That's it.
Okay,
That's it.
Yeah,
Okay,
You guys.
You know,
Physics is stuck right now.
And there's the grand unification theory that is needed.
Nobody's got it.
And there's a theory of everything that is needed,
And nobody's come up with it.
You guys,
I don't think a scientist is going to come up with it until he or she realizes they're part of God.
Do you understand?
I think this is the missing component.
So it even affects our thinking.
We're thinking more in separation because we don't get that we're part of God.
And you know,
A big indicator of this,
I think it's so funny.
This is so much the kind of signal that Premasuddha's got in her thinking as time goes on.
But so the theory of everything spells toe.
That is so funny.
We're in our heads.
We need to come down to our toes,
To the ground.
You see,
Not only this,
You guys,
But the grand unification theory spells gut.
What we know in our guts.
Do you see what I mean?
And I think all the scientists are going around in circles because what the human race doesn't get is that we're part of God.
Yeah,
I know.
It is hilarious.
And this is,
You know,
If this helps you be lighter about your experience and also have less faith in,
Quote,
Expert knowledge by people who are like supposed to know,
Because they don't.
They don't.
Many have just had many years of formal education.
They're not speaking from their creator aspect.
So,
If your job is to,
You know,
Discover the creator in you,
Then,
You know,
You will learn over time to really trust the data you get.
As these golden threads get woven into the tapestry.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
So,
We're doing,
We're going to do physics for a bit,
You guys.
And I tell you,
It is coming in so strongly from the universe,
From Alma,
To do this.
So,
The other thing is,
If you shine,
And some of you may have seen this video that I've just put up,
If you shine light into a box,
And you shine it through a tiny hole,
So there's no chance of the,
You know,
Light escaping.
You keep shining,
So it's all.
The box will get heavier in weight.
Now,
This is physics.
The mass of the box increases.
Okay,
I want you to think of that because there is no obvious causality to that because light is weightless.
Okay,
So I really want you to get what I'm going to say next,
Which is human bodies emit light.
Actually,
All matter emits light.
Okay.
The reason that scientists say that the reason that human beings emit light is because of our digestive processes,
Our metabolic processes.
But this is a little bit of a superficial explanation.
It might explain why it is happening in the concrete world,
But it doesn't really explain the reason we emit light,
The bigger reason,
The global reason.
But we do.
Okay.
Now,
I'm going to shine a light on why your experience trying to evolve is uncomfortable.
Oh,
Yeah.
Okay,
Back to the human body.
When we die,
We get lighter.
We lose mass.
Just like the box.
You are a box of light,
In a way.
Okay,
Now.
So,
You have light and mass in you.
So,
Light has a very different way of experiencing reality.
Light travels at 186,
000 miles a second,
And it's 300,
000 kilometers.
And it takes eight minutes and 20 seconds to reach the earth from the sun,
93 million miles away.
So,
Light,
If you are light,
Just imagine being light.
You're moving at the speed of light,
And all time stops from light's perspective.
So,
Light has no experience of the journey from the sun to your eyes.
For light,
It's just all instantaneous.
There's no travel time.
So,
It leaves the sun and reaches your eyes at the same moment.
Okay,
And you know how we say in life,
Oh,
Time stood still when I saw that person that I fell in love with.
We do this.
I remember sitting in the psych ward in my 30s,
And I looked at the clock,
And then four hours passed.
Really,
It was about four hours.
And I looked back at the clock,
And one minute had passed.
Okay,
So,
I'm just,
You know,
But in for you,
For the mass of you,
For,
You know,
For mass,
For your body,
Light,
For your body,
The universe is 13 billion years old,
And the light took eight minutes and 20 seconds to reach your eyes.
So,
Within you are the two perspectives.
And this is the,
What's the word,
Awkward bedfellows.
They don't mesh so easily.
The only way they mesh,
In a way,
Is you go through these spiritual challenges.
That is my experience.
And as you do that,
The tapestry gets golden threads woven in.
But I'm wanting you to embrace your humanity for why the spiritual journey feels so difficult,
And why it's hard to see that,
You know,
The bigger the creator exists,
Because you're boxed.
So,
Basically,
Your perceptions are boxed by the experience of having a body and having weight in this space and time continuum.
Yeah,
You know,
In me,
Remember,
The theory of everything spells toe,
The grand unification spells cut.
It's kind of like,
This is our hardest thing,
To get the comprehension,
To get the big comprehension on the human level.
It is the thing that we are most neglecting at this time,
And that we're most scared of.
And what aspect is the kind of the personal,
You know,
Present in the body,
Not focused on the body in a bad way,
But what aspect of us is concerned with subjective experience,
And also the experience of life in the body,
It's our feminine.
You know,
The giving birth,
The physical,
The physical realm.
In Indian philosophy,
This is,
You know,
Shakti and Shiva.
Shiva is the male principle,
The absolute coming from the divine,
And Shakti is the energetic,
Physical.
Yeah,
And you see,
When we move into truth,
There is a union of our soul and our physical,
They stop arguing.
It's a sacred marriage,
Jung talked about,
And it's,
You know,
In the Indian philosophy,
They have a symbol for this,
And I've forgotten the name,
Of course.
Do you guys know what it is?
It's a physical symbol for male and female.
Oh,
The linga,
The linga.
Yeah,
Anyway,
I'm losing you a bit.
But if you get,
Like,
That you emit light,
And light gives increased mass to the physical,
And it brings heat,
And you know,
When we die,
We get colder.
Body,
You know,
And we weigh less.
It's to really get that your true nature is a reality,
It's not a ghost in a machine,
It's not a phantom thing.
It's real,
And it's orchestrating your whole existence.
If you think of those wormholes.
Your birth was already decided,
Your death is already decided.
Even if you have a near-death experience,
That would be included in the wormhole,
In the passage.
We talked about wormholes,
Just a name for a passage.
I'm losing you a little bit.
It would be better to have a book of illustrations,
Probably.
Another thing I wanted to talk about,
Are there any questions about this at all?
Or comments?
There's one thing I'd like to say.
Richard Feynman,
Who was a theoretical physicist who earned the Nobel Prize,
And he was very good at explaining,
And his comprehension was very big.
And it's interesting that his first love,
He fell in love,
And she got a disease.
And the doctors totally misdiagnosed it,
So it turned into a big mess.
And he realized that the experts didn't really know,
That the doctors weren't really using their thinking.
There was one expert who,
With the disease,
He gave a diagnosis,
But the test for this disease had registered negative.
And it was as if the doctor was insecure with just not knowing.
So even though the test had registered negative,
He gave that wrong diagnosis.
Maybe insecure about not knowing.
And one of the things that happened with John,
With his leukemia thing,
They first diagnosed it as storage cell disease,
But there was no.
.
.
It's genetic,
But there was no genetics.
There was nobody in my family line that had that.
And the other thing was that there was another thing where they thought it was something,
And then the test was deeply ambiguous,
But they said it was that.
So,
You know,
Human beings,
Maybe at this point,
Were not comfortable with not knowing.
And this is part of the problem.
So we jump at solutions,
Not only in physics or medicine,
But maybe in our own lives.
Right.
Just seeing that,
You guys.
Just seeing that.
That is where your fear is.
So if you can just witness that,
And see how much it does not work to jump at solutions,
And feel the sorrow of when you get caught in a mess because you jumped at a solution,
Your fear will go down.
Good.
This is how I got rid of fear,
Was I felt the sorrow of how much it was screwing up my experience.
How much listening to the fear made me do really stupid things.
And I felt the sorrow of it very deeply,
Took it to the creator,
Amo,
And golden threads got woven into my tapestry.
I am so happy I'm finding a way to explain all this to you in a deeper,
More powerful way.
Yeah.
Yeah,
It's a big relief,
Maybe for all of us.
So,
And I'll come back to,
I think part of the reason we're so uncomfortable with not knowing,
Is we're not well bonded to our moms.
Because our moms,
Most of our moms were not self-realized,
And most of them are growing up in a patriarchy where they're turning against themselves.
This is why if you want to get really big understanding,
Gandhi said,
Most of our social problems would dissolve if we took better care of the innocence of children.
Yeah,
This is what we're in,
And it's like we don't have a big enough understanding to see the cost of what we're doing,
Or we don't want to.
And I'm wondering if,
You know,
Maybe when somebody really does come up with a grand unification theory,
Or the theory of everything,
That maybe it will change the way that we are with our children.
But the main thing that would change,
You know,
How we are with our children,
Is if you get that you're part of God.
That you are part of God.
And then they are too.
You're not an economic unit,
Part of God.
That's it.
That's it.
Right.
How do I say this?
It's like I can feel the Creator saying to communicate how beautiful you are.
And I can feel that for,
Well,
Many of you,
It's covered up by the darkness of your head's misunderstanding.
This maybe is the darkness that I felt was going to be leaving as part of this acceleration.
Maybe it's to understand that your head is not God.
Your head is a deluded,
Very scared child.
That's where your thinking comes from,
You guys.
It's only through these,
Going through these spiritual challenges that even your thinking can become free.
So,
We get there through self-love,
You guys.
Not through beating yourself up.
This,
The beating yourself up just comes from the scared child.
Yeah,
Who's just trying to behave well,
You know?
Does things to themselves so that they'll behave well and please the parents,
You know?
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
Okay,
That's.
.
.
There's some things starting to roll off some of your shoulders with that understanding that the beating yourself up just comes from a child trying to control herself or himself to stay acceptable for the parents.
And we get out of this by experiencing that we're a part of the Creator.
Okay,
The other thing is I want to talk about how these laws of physics affect us psychologically.
So,
We know that energy cannot be destroyed.
It can only be transformed.
Okay,
Well,
Likewise,
When we come across darkness in ourselves,
The ego tries to destroy it.
Think about it.
It does.
It starts fighting with it.
It either denies it exists or else starts fighting with it,
And that just makes the darkness bigger.
You cannot destroy the darkness you see within you.
What you can do is allow it to change form.
You allow it to transform into light.
And you do that through patience.
So,
A dear one had a dream where she was being chased by a bad man,
And she wrote me about it.
You know,
Because you get.
.
.
These things come up and they rattle us.
So,
It's a picture of darkness.
In this,
It was coming as a bad man,
But it could have been a bad woman.
I mean,
We're in a patriarchy,
So we might dream about a bad man,
But women are carrying the same misunderstandings that the males are through our cultures.
And any dream is showing us part of ourselves.
We might be victimized in a dream,
But a bad man in there is a belief system,
And it's got emotions in it,
And it will be operating in this dear one's psychology.
It's exactly where if we're too hard on ourselves,
Too judgmental,
It would be that.
The bad man would be where she gets hard on herself,
Judgmental,
Goes into her head,
Tries to figure it out.
Okay,
This bad man cannot be destroyed,
But he can be transformed.
And this is the importance,
You guys,
Of working with your human psychological vehicle.
So,
I suggested that she go back,
You know,
Lie down,
Go back into the dream through imagination,
And change it.
Because,
You know,
She'd woken up being chased,
But she was chased,
She woke up terrified.
So,
I said,
Go back.
So,
In this dream,
She imagined herself in the car,
And she heard still a little voice inside going,
You know,
Turn and face this,
You can trust me.
That would have been the light or the soul within her.
So,
You know,
In her imagination,
She stopped the car and got out and faced him.
And when she got out of her car,
Or when she woke up,
Or,
You know,
When she came out of this imagining,
She felt this surge of strength come into her body.
She felt hopeful.
She felt,
I can do this.
Okay,
That's light weaving,
That is golden thread weaving into the tapestry.
She can face this within herself.
And our facing of it happens when we,
You know,
We start judging ourselves or somebody else,
And we catch it.
It's like catching the negative energy,
Catching it.
And giving it over to the creator or replacing the thought or even just catching it and going,
Oh,
I'm really doing it again.
You guys haven't,
Some of you haven't had the will to do these things.
So,
Some of you would come to satsang,
But when it came to your own life,
You wouldn't take the action.
Yeah,
And it's kind of why,
It's what physics is helping with.
Because the physics of it,
Once you get,
The physics is just describing the laws of our physical universe.
You realize that it actually functions psychologically too.
It's everywhere.
It's like theory of everything spells toe.
You know,
We're universes in our own right.
The whole universe is inside us,
You guys.
And when we meet each other,
We're like two universes speaking to each other with all our past history of all our past lives.
And at the same time,
Everything is one.
So,
This is the other thing about physics is particles are,
Can be separate and tangled and part of waves all at the same time.
But I'm not going to get too,
I'm not going to get too,
We'll do this gradually over time.
So that you get this understanding of physics in your bones.
I'm hoping that it comes into your bones.
So,
We'll make room for the light to come in.
Okay,
I'm going to,
I wasn't going to talk about this today,
But I'm going to.
Let me talk about it again.
It's about how light flows.
So,
You know,
With basic physics,
You know,
You shine a light,
It hits an object,
It reflects off.
And light goes at 186,
000 miles per hour.
But actually,
You guys,
On the atomic and subatomic levels,
Light functions very differently.
Okay,
And this is why we need the grand unification theory or theory of everything.
On the,
In the quantum area,
The subatomic particles and atomic particles,
Light actually goes in every direction at once.
It like goes straight,
But another light photon could truly,
It could go from your forehead to the moon and back again,
And could even go faster than the speed of light.
Okay,
So you've got this chaos of photons,
Of light photons,
Moving in different directions,
Breaking all the rules of physics,
Really going faster than light,
The physics think,
I know.
Okay,
But what happens is the light that is going more in the chaotic thing,
Like from your forehead to the moon and back,
Or even back,
You guys,
To the past.
So this is how chaotic at the quantum level it is.
But what happens is the weirdo light beams cancel each other out.
So it's like with,
Say,
Different speeds,
If you've got something going faster than the speed of light,
Something going slower than the speed of light,
It cancels out.
So what happens in our experience,
And I think this happens psychologically too,
Is light ends up going forward in a straight line.
But really,
It's chaos.
It's just the part that shows.
It's like the rest gets canceled out,
And you just get the straight lines.
And what happens is the light that is closest to the straight line,
It all starts supporting it.
It all strengthens the straight line.
Now,
I think this is a picture of integrity.
How integrity functions.
It's like we can take all kinds of detours in our life.
We can become an addict.
We can do all kinds of detours.
But there's something in us that propels us to actually move forward in our truth.
It's like,
You know,
The Michael teachings that I've talked about before,
Which is,
It's coming from a disembodied level,
At the same level as Amma,
According to this.
It's coming from the causal plane.
Someone like Amma is basically living at the causal plane level,
Just like a thousand of us,
A million of us.
Okay,
Now,
This is where this teaching says it's coming from.
It has been very useful to me as I've gone through my life.
It says that in our lives,
We have to experience everything possible on the human plane.
So,
We have to be the murder and the murdered.
We have to be the thief and the person being robbed from,
That we get all those experiences.
And if you think about them,
They all cancel out,
And it turns into wisdom.
So,
If you're a murderer,
Murdered,
You have that experience.
What you glean from it is wisdom,
Knowledge.
I can feel this wall in you.
And I think it's the wall I was talking about earlier,
This darkness coming from the head.
Coming from,
Living from the head,
Rather than living from the heart.
Living from the heart includes the data of coming from this chaotic way light is shining.
It includes it,
Without getting distracted by it.
I can feel why I was going to leave this for next week,
Because I think I should have.
I think this hood has broken the camel's back.
So,
Maybe we'll just leave that.
We'll just say that was a chaotic light beam,
And it's just going to be cancelled out now.
We're just going to ignore it.
We'll talk about it another.
Okay,
So we'll come back to what I really talked about,
Which is that we talked about the space-time block.
And then also life being like a fabric,
Which confirms what the Rishis say.
Our bodies emit light,
And we have this awkward barrage between our physical being and the light within us.
Because they see things very differently.
Yeah.
And energy cannot be destroyed.
If we get that,
That's why self-compassion works.
Because when you steer towards self-compassion,
You're saying,
Okay,
I'm opening to something to help me transform this energy.
Because the way I'm looking at life,
This darkness seems true to me,
But it's uncomfortable.
So,
I must be missing something.
So,
You open up to receive more light,
More understanding.
And that then allows this darkness within you to transform.
This is what I have the most trouble with.
It's kind of like,
That's what it feels like.
I have the most trouble with you guys just around this.
Around just opening.
Opening your heads.
So that you can allow who you are to be born.
Okay.
That is the whole point of this satsang.
That's it.
That's all that's wanted.
That's all Pramasutra wants.
Right?
For the baby to be born.
The baby of your deeper understanding.
Your deeper realization.
You know,
When a real scientist who is checking out a theory,
He's doing it with his whole heart.
He's got his life on the line with it.
He lives it.
So,
If his theories don't work,
It is traumatic for that person,
Male or female.
Their whole sense of reality gets lost.
This happens to us too,
You guys,
When we're making a leap to a higher vibration.
We can feel like a scientist whose theory doesn't work.
And the scientist,
You know,
He's got his whole.
.
.
Even his earning capacity will be involved with his theory.
His job.
Perhaps.
Yeah.
This is.
.
.
Okay,
Good.
Okay,
I'm getting this voice saying,
If you were wondering what's really bothering them,
Pramasutra,
It's this.
Okay.
It's this,
You guys.
This rub about the physical survival,
Like keeping a job,
Staying married,
Keeping all the relationships the same,
And yet wanting all this higher understanding,
And wondering if you're going to lose any of them.
If you grow.
Will you lose your job?
Will you lose the people you love?
Will you lose your idea of yourself?
And you guys,
We do lose our idea of ourselves.
We go through stuff and we get sick,
We die.
This is all.
We're actually not our physical beings.
What I want to do is somehow bring comfort to you.
So on one hand,
I'm dislodging maybe some sacred cows,
And at the same time,
There is the whole infinite compassion behind what I'm saying.
It's actually behind what's coming to me to be said.
It's like a transmission of infinite compassion.
Yeah.
Okay,
Good.
Good.
Good.
Good.
That's helping some of you relax a little.
It's like this baby wants to be born,
You guys.
You guys,
Maybe you're all feeling it.
You know,
Even if some of what I say doesn't make sense,
It's transmitting to you the agape,
The unconditional love behind the words is being transmitted to you.
And that is actually what will help you evolve.
The words are kind of useful,
But they're also kind of incidental.
But it might be a good idea to think about these things.
It's like when I first read the Gita,
It didn't make sense to me,
But I kept reading it and reading it,
And then slowly it made sense to me.
I don't know if you guys have this feeling.
I remember in my younger years feeling like when I grew,
It was sort of like putting my head up.
Like,
Imagine a war where there's fighting in the trenches,
You know,
Putting your head up,
And you could get shot.
You might get shot.
It was a feeling as if I rose up in understanding that I would get shot.
And it was just a fear functioning.
It was the opposite.
As I rose up in understanding,
Everything got gentler.
But it was that kind of feeling of,
Oh,
Dangerous to step out of line.
But actually,
It's dangerous to stay un-evolved.
Because the more un-evolved you are,
The less control you have over your experience and what happens to you.
Truly,
The more in light you are,
Like supposing you're passing somebody,
I mean,
This is kind of a gruesome thing,
But the more in truth you are,
If you're in a mall and somebody brings out a gun and starts shooting people,
It's like he won't shoot you.
It's like that.
The universe will protect the process of evolution.
You know,
If you have an agreement,
But you wouldn't even have an agreement to lose your life in that situation.
It just would be so improbable.
Anybody have any questions or comments?
About anything,
Including the most personal thing that doesn't seem to have any connection to this.
But it will.
The importance of coming forward is,
It comes back to,
You know,
The grand unification theory spells gut and the theory of everything spells toe.
It's like it is only solvable on the human level.
You know?
Yeah.
Judy,
Did you have something?
Well,
I'm way new to the group,
So I don't feel.
.
.
I shouldn't say that,
But truthfully,
I feel new enough to be speaking like the child who doesn't really know,
Which is good.
But anyway,
Two things.
When you talked about getting the mass shooter,
It made me think about the dynamics of the one.
.
.
Long ago,
It was one of the earliest shootings where a kid went into a school and he looked at a girl and he said,
Do you believe in God?
She said,
Yes,
And he shot her.
So that was weird to me because there has to be a different dynamic that's unrelated to what you just said.
There has to be a connection there.
She was probably taught about.
.
.
First of all,
She would have had agreement from before time for that to happen.
But second of all,
She would have had,
I'd say,
Parents teaching her about God who had no idea who God was.
Right.
I wondered,
Too,
If it was a blind thing where we think.
.
.
Like,
I know I was raised to think that sacrificing your life for another person was the ultimate good thing.
Whether that's true or not,
I don't know.
Can I switch to something else that I thought of while we were talking?
When you were talking about how we are the opposites of everything,
We have to experience everything.
Well,
That made me think because I deliberately avoid violence.
I don't like to look at it.
I don't like to read about it.
I don't like to hear about it.
And I don't like.
.
.
Because I'm of the mindset that I.
.
.
It's pollution for me.
And yet,
Lately in my dreams,
There's one that just happened a month ago.
I was stabbing somebody.
I mean,
I was going for it and I was upset with myself because the first hit wasn't going to do the job.
Right.
And then there was this thing over my left shoulder saying,
You can do better than that or something.
And I knew I had to go for the neck or the heart.
I actually just had to stop and say,
Judy,
It's time to get up and end this dream.
And I just went up to the bathroom so that I would just stop the crazy.
But then I thought,
What if I have to experience the other side of this?
Since you said that.
Anyway,
That's all I have to say.
You know,
There's a level that in the spiritual journey that you have to be able to,
In a way,
Kill your ego.
Like you have to kill your ego.
You have to allow your ego to be eliminated.
And it is,
In some ways,
A violent process,
In a way.
It's sort of like,
If you've got something like eating your food,
You tell a cow,
You know,
Like stop eating my plant or whatever.
And the cow's not going to listen.
The cow will only listen to like a stick and you get out of here.
Okay.
Okay.
So,
You know,
In the dream,
It may have been like in a way that may be part of what's going on is you not wanting to,
But you wanting to like,
That you're fed up with living at the ego level.
You see,
You guys,
Our heads try to box everything and make everything simple.
This is exactly what I'm talking about.
But there are way more threads in all of this than we realize until we really wake up and we start seeing all the threads and influences and bad and good go out the window with this.
It's true.
This was chasing me before I did this.
This was chasing me and I laid in wait.
I waited around the corner of a door knowing that it was my time to end this.
Anyway,
So possibly ego.
There we are.
There we are.
And the voice behind saying,
Really do it.
Don't do a halfway job on this.
Get really fed up with your level of vibration and allow the baby to be born.
I can't tell you how good that feels.
Right.
This is the point of satsang,
You guys,
Because you do what Judy was doing,
Was getting stuck in bad and good and violence is bad.
And this is not,
It's okay.
It's how we're taught.
And violence,
You know,
Really enlightened person cannot be violent.
So there's truth in it in a way,
But the bad or good stops us from taking this deeper step that Judy just did.
Yeah.
And I feel like you don't quite understand this,
Judy,
And not that you should.
You're going to have to percolate.
This is,
It's really simple and powerful like at the aboriginal level,
This work.
It goes beyond a lot of the civilized bad and good boxes we've got.
Okay.
I can feel like it's not anything you have to do,
Judy.
It's actually going to be done for you by the light within you,
Okay?
So you don't,
We just go along with the ride.
Prema Sutta did not do her evolution.
Something beyond me did,
And something beyond me brought me to,
Made me so uncomfortable that I surrendered to it and listened and followed.
This is where I'm wanting to bring you guys to,
And that's why I'm wanting to bring you to surrender.
And some of you don't want to surrender.
I'm feeling it in some of you right now,
But it's like,
It's just going to be done for you,
Or you'll die without surrendering.
What do you want?
Really,
What do you want?
It's so simple.
And this,
The point of the satsang is just to give you enough emotional support and to help you with your mind so that you allow yourself to sprout.
That's it.
That's it.
That's it.
It's very beautiful.
That's it.
Prema Sutta.
Yes,
Please.
You know,
It just makes me think for years and years how I've been working in the,
You know,
Everything boils down to science,
According to most people.
And that's always really,
Really bothered me because I always felt that there's something that you just,
You know,
Can't explain.
And I mean,
We know all that,
But that the science part,
They were missing a key element in science.
They couldn't explain the science properly,
And it would be just very superficial because there was something that they were really missing.
So,
You know,
This craze that the world has with STEM,
And then I thought of brain STEM,
You know,
The craze that the world has with STEM,
It's just getting worse and worse.
And I mean,
All I'm trying to say is,
You know,
I can relate to,
I don't understand everything you're saying,
But I can certainly relate to parts of it.
Yeah,
And the key question is,
What did you do and what do you do with your discomfiture when it comes up like that,
Your discomfiture with science?
What did you do with it?
Well,
I remember sometimes in meetings actually saying,
Look,
You know,
Let's not focus just on,
I can't remember exactly what I did,
But my sense is that I was trying to get people to focus on something else and not just straight numbers.
And every little detail they wanted to prove through some kind of scientific study,
Which was costly and complicated.
And I just said,
I don't think that really explains it.
That's all I really could do.
And then try and think,
You know,
For myself in,
You know,
Wherever I'm,
You know,
Wherever I'm working,
How else to explain it?
Did you get anywhere?
I probably got to the first step,
But I'm not sure.
I'm still trying to write.
I'm still in chapter one.
Okay.
So the thing is,
Michael,
That in everything you say,
Like it's,
I hear it and I honor it.
And yet I think the whole thing is a big deflection away from your inner truth.
And then we come back to the honesty that I've been hammering with you.
In a way,
I know what you mean,
Because on the other side,
I don't really want to over-intellectualize it.
I think I know what you mean.
There's this part of you,
Like I see you're speaking,
But I'm seeing that the truth of you is in darkness,
And I'm wanting you to speak from the truth of you more.
It's like you don't know how to do that with me.
It's not even with me.
It's like you don't dare.
It's like you absolutely don't dare.
So,
How do you feel when I say that?
I guess I don't feel it.
I'm not asking you whether you feel it or not.
I'm asking how do you feel?
Neutral,
Pretty neutral.
Okay,
So I'm burping,
So this is useful.
That's it.
That's it.
I can see kind of a little bit of an outline of more your real self.
It's a little,
It's just getting lighter,
A little lighter.
Okay,
Now I want you to think very carefully about this question,
And I don't want you to fudge at all.
How do you feel?
Just say whatever it is.
Okay,
So I'm just going to tell you that I'm seeing the darkness coming back.
So,
It may be in,
You know,
It's just getting more comfortable with the space of silence,
Michael.
I think this is more important.
Like,
Just,
It's just not,
Like,
It's not even not talking versus talking.
It's getting more comfortable with the state of true silence,
The silence of being.
And this will be for all of you guys.
It is what's operating in everybody.
And because of everything's one,
Every burp at my end was,
It was like an energetic assisting to,
For this darkness to be released,
Kind of like a support,
Love coming.
And it's like your soul really wants this to happen,
And your head,
It just kind of keeps getting in the way.
Like,
I was talking about you guys,
Because we're heads are so limited.
They make things bad or good.
A lot of times when people speak to me,
I hear I'm being a good boy or girl.
And that's what was operating,
Michael.
You were speaking from that,
That little child who's,
You know,
Wants to please his mom,
Doesn't want a bad mom,
Wants a happy mom.
And you don't even know you do it.
You guys,
The light chases us,
You know,
It's like,
If we're not being really true to ourselves,
We'll be restless.
We'll have trouble sleeping.
We'll have this sense of that I'm in the wrong place.
You know,
It's the light in us,
The truth of us does not go away.
It's always there signaling.
You're,
Michael,
You're saying underneath,
You're saying,
I haven't earned it.
You're going,
I haven't earned the knowledge.
It's like,
There's nothing to earn.
There's,
It's just grace.
This may be harder for the males,
Because they're so used to having to do something,
You know,
In the,
In the simpler realms,
They would like,
Support their families,
You know,
Go hunt and support their families,
Build the cabins and hunt,
Provide.
Male has to do that to support the women giving birth.
Males struggle with this,
I think,
More than women.
I have to earn it,
Like,
I can feel it.
It's like,
You're going,
Right,
You have to earn it.
I have to do something to earn it.
This is the pointy shoes of the car salesman,
Who doesn't believe that the universe will support him in the sale of cars.
So,
He has to twist things.
He doesn't,
You don't have to earn this.
At all.
Right.
Yeah.
You know,
Again,
The psychology,
What happens,
We feel we have to earn stuff,
So we're not true,
So we get rejected.
You know,
This is,
And then we try harder to earn it.
I mean,
This is,
Yeah.
Yeah.
You don't earn this,
You are this.
That's it.
So,
Michael,
What do you think of all this?
Where are you in all this?
I guess I'm not sure,
But when you say that I feel I have to earn it,
You mean the knowledge.
Everything.
Everything.
You feel you have to earn everything.
Well,
That certainly rings true.
Right.
Good.
Good.
Rings true.
Yeah,
Absolutely.
Right.
Okay,
Good.
And when something rings true,
You guys,
It goes beyond our heads.
It becomes more of a physical experience.
This is the toe and the gut,
The grand unification theory,
Theory of everything.
It includes the body.
It is a physical experience of,
It might be a subtle relaxation.
It is a subtle realization.
This is the process of realizing the soul.
You register truth.
It's the soul that registers the truth.
It goes,
This is true.
That's it.
Good.
Good.
And this is the great thing of illness and everything.
It reduces us down so that we actually get more open.
Right.
Good.
Michael,
My hat off.
Kudos,
Really.
Yay.
To see you receive it when you give up having to earn it.
This is it.
This is grace,
You guys.
You know that song,
Amazing Grace,
And the guy's going,
Like an idiot like me,
I'm getting grace.
This is amazing.
You know,
This is for all of us.
We go like,
What?
Me?
What?
Yeah.
Oh,
This is so good.
Yeah.
Yeah,
Good.
You know,
When I was talking about light going in every direction,
I look at my spiritual journey.
I have had such a wild spiritual journey.
And it's kind of what's distilled out of it,
This light going every direction,
Is this clarity and an embrace of all our levels of experience.
You know,
Our physical,
Emotional,
Spiritual,
All of it.
Yeah.
That's very beautiful.
I feel like there's a peace.
Some of you may be feeling a peace.
Yeah,
That's very beautiful.
You just settle into peace somehow.
Yeah.
You know,
The ripple of the disturbance finishes,
And you just end up with the stillness of a lake.
There's something I saw quickly just on my phone.
It was twins being born,
And they had two different fathers.
And this is unheard of.
But I was thinking when I saw this,
That it was sort of a picture of where we are.
It's like,
Which male are we going forward with?
The male energy being used for steadiness,
Objectivity,
And,
You know,
The male will be like,
It's the tribal area.
It's like,
You know,
The laws that helped the whole tribe.
Yeah.
And the feminine's more the personal and subjective.
And it's wonderful,
But it can get chaotic.
And we need the rules from the tribe.
But it's whether the male leadership is coming from a beneficent energy of wanting the good for everyone,
Or whether it's wanting what we see commonly is this grabbing of resources.
And it's almost like we've got two different human beings who are going to be the result of all this.
Two different ways humanity can go.
And I also feel that it's women need to stand in their true natures,
Because we inspire the men.
That's the role of the feminine.
We inspire them to be better men than they would be without us.
This isn't talked about.
To do this,
A woman has to have her femininity.
She has to have her true femaleness.
Because if she doesn't,
She'll just kind of cater to the whims of the patriarchy to fit in.
But if she's in truth,
She can inspire the male to rise up,
Become more than he ever could have been.
This is one of the big importances of women,
And what we have to offer this world.
Well,
Everything seems to be enriched,
You guys.
I can feel the richness and the love power of all this,
And the changes in you guys.
Yeah.
And just be with it all.
It's drip by drip by drip.
Like an ivy of unconditional love coming to you.
Yeah.
Really,
That's what it is.
And it's happening all the time.
It's not just when you come to satsang,
But if you.
.
.
I just feel like the universe is taking care of you.
It's like the universe does respond.
When we step up,
The universe will support us in very big ways.
Well,
I'll find the physics for this,
Too.
It's going to happen.
I'm going to find the physics that supports what I already know.
Anyway,
You guys,
I guess,
Last call for any.
.
.
I promised that.
Oh,
Excuse me.
Yeah.
I don't know if it's going to sound this bad when I put my microphone on.
Yeah,
Just a lot of what you were saying,
Laterally,
Was really resonating,
Because I've been kind of forced to surrender this week.
I'm feeling ill.
And yeah,
I just had a lot on the last week,
And I was trying to push through some commitments.
And yeah,
I already have some chronic issues that do force me to stop sometimes.
But halfway through a training day,
I had to say to the trainer,
I can't stay,
Which was so uncomfortable.
But yeah,
I just got to the point where I didn't have a choice,
And I had to go.
And yeah,
And it's all,
Yeah,
Quite uncomfortable.
And it's like kind of one of the worst kind of fatigue,
Like nervous system crashes that I've had for a while.
And so there's sort of this thought in my head,
Like,
Is it a feeling because I've not done this or that?
But I mean,
I know,
Well,
I know there's learning in it,
And there's surrender.
And it actually,
Yesterday,
So this was on Friday,
That I had to come home.
And yesterday,
I think I was struggling to relax.
Like,
I still felt my nervous system was like,
Yeah,
It was just,
I couldn't kind of just,
I felt like I needed something to occupy my mind,
Because like,
I couldn't just be with myself,
You know,
I couldn't just be in my body.
There it is.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Now,
This is what I want to say to you.
I had tremendous fatigue that I had to come home and lie down.
I like,
I didn't function very well for some years.
I also had anxiety,
But I took it as,
Well,
If I'm fatigued,
I lie down.
And I just am with myself.
And what would happen is,
I get a bigger understanding coming in.
Yeah,
Like,
I think that you're living kind of,
There's something very similar about you and I and our experience of lives.
And I'm wanting you,
Your generation is a little more boxed than mine.
And I'm wanting you to learn to allow these experiences more.
Go with them.
Don't make them wrong.
There's nothing wrong with them.
I just thought,
You know what I thought with me?
I thought,
Well,
Maybe I'm just a very lazy person.
That's what I do with that,
You know,
Like,
My mom would be kind of rolling her eyes,
You know,
When I went and stayed with her for a while.
And then,
You know,
And it's,
But,
But it had to be that for my process.
And I didn't understand,
Lorna,
I didn't understand how big my process was.
Do you understand?
I just thought I was fairly neurotic.
I did not think that I would come to this level of peace.
I had no real idea.
There is a,
There is a intelligence in our process.
Yeah.
And just follow it.
And if they all think you're eccentric,
Oh well.
And,
And you know what?
Don't explain too much.
Just say,
Yeah,
I got to go.
Not feeling that great.
Just don't tell people about this stuff because everybody will make you wrong.
Premisuda will.
You can tell Premisuda.
I'll go,
Yeah,
I know what that's like.
Yeah.
I mean,
Thankfully the,
The trainer,
It was actually like suicide prevention training.
So it was like quite heavy going.
And I mean,
The trainer was incredibly empathetic and understood I needed to go.
I mean,
I was in tears.
Like that's how spent I was.
Just,
Well,
I don't know what the,
I'm not totally sure.
You know,
Even you're,
You're kind of doing what Michael did.
It's sort of like you were spent because your universe,
Your soul really wanted you to come back to yourself.
Right.
And yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I feel like I'm missing you.
Part of,
You know,
I realized like stuff for me,
I'm just going two plus two equals four,
But I understand that for most people it's just like you want,
You want,
You want Premisuda.
Yeah.
Okay.
Here we are.
You're saying to me underneath,
I just don't think I mean much Premisuda.
I don't mean that much to the world.
I don't mean that much to my family.
I,
I'm not allowed to mean that much.
I have to stay kind of a little,
I have to trivialize this.
I have to play in trivialization in order to be able to be here.
So how do you feel when I say this?
And just be very honest.
Yeah.
I mean,
It resonates,
Like I feel pressure in my chest and it resonates.
It reminds me of,
Well,
I'm thinking,
Yeah,
Like I feel I have to prove myself.
Right.
So this is like Michael earning it.
Okay.
The pressure in your chest is where?
Like,
Just like around the center,
Kind of.
It's actually,
I don't feel it actually so much now.
Right.
Okay.
Good.
Do you like it?
Slighter.
Okay.
So it's a withhold,
A clench around your heart.
Lifting.
Okay,
You guys,
This is everywhere needs to happen.
Our hearts,
The clench around our heart needs to be allowed to release up.
We live in a clench around our hearts.
We live in our heads and we clench our hearts.
And as we allow our heart to become unclenched,
Our understanding gets much freer.
Part of you,
You're still,
Lorna,
You're still in the trivialization.
Not that you should come out,
But it's sort of like if you were,
It's like you're living as if you're a watercolor,
You know,
With a little bit washed out colors when you're meant to be,
Your colors are meant to be very rich and vibrant.
This,
Your head doesn't understand this.
And when the colors are wanting to come for the richer,
The head goes,
Oh,
This is,
This isn't,
This is,
This is bad.
This is crazy.
Right.
Like you guys,
What a human being is capable of is way beyond the way we're living.
Like Pranasutha has allowed a lot of development of my capabilities.
Any of us are,
We just have,
We're,
We've got infinite intelligence.
Right.
Okay,
Good.
There's a little bit of you allowing a little bit of infinite intelligence into your head.
It's good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And that's ultimately what I want,
But it's like a bit of me fighting because I know I'm starting a new job in a couple of weeks time.
And I'm like,
I really want to be well for it.
You know,
Like I have this fear that the issues that I have will,
Will kind of sabotage this new job that I feel.
Your feet are too big for the shoes that you've bought and you really want to fit into for the party you want to go to.
And you just really hope that you're,
You know,
You just,
So you're gonna be,
You know,
That's kind of where you are,
But you know,
I,
This is the trouble with the being light and being in the human body.
It's exactly this,
You want,
You want the job at the same time you want infinite knowledge.
Maybe you can have both,
But I'll tell you what,
If you're worried about it,
You need to give it over because I'll tell you what,
Lorna,
The rule of our psychology is if we're worried about something,
It is negative prayer.
It is actually praying for that outcome.
So give it over.
Okay.
Yeah.
The true will be done.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
All right.
So it is.
Yeah.
Cause the funny thing is like,
I really thought I was,
I really,
I felt that I was brought to this job and this role.
Like it feels like it,
Things have aligned to bring it.
Like it feels like the most aligned to me of any job.
Okay.
So,
So I have to trust.
Yeah.
So Lorna,
Maybe you just needed to hear all this to then fit comfortably into the job,
You know?
So.
Yeah.
Cause yeah.
I was worrying about not being good enough for a couple of days before this all happened.
I don't want you to get too heady.
So just keep your heart.
Okay.
Just keep bringing your attention to your heart.
Say a mantra.
I don't want you to get heady.
Right.
Right.
The more you see your mantra,
You guys,
The more you're telling your psyche that you want to come into your heart.
It's an hour and a half.
We have to,
We have to finish.
You guys,
I'm sure you're all OD anyway.
It's like,
When is this going to stop?
Okay.
Well,
Many,
Many blessings and I'll send it out to you.
Bye you guys.