EFT Tapping For People Pleasing: Saying No With Love

12:38

EFT Tapping For People Pleasing: Saying No With Love

by Rachel Collins

Type

guided

Activity

Meditation

Suitable for

Everyone

Do you say yes when everything in you wants to say no — afraid that an honest no will disappoint someone or make you seem unkind? This 12-minute EFT tapping session is for the exhaustion of people pleasing. Not the occasional compromise that comes from genuinely wanting to help. But the automatic, fear-driven yes that leaves you feeling depleted and quietly invisible in your own life. In three rounds of tapping you will acknowledge the weight of always putting everyone else first, release the fear that saying no will cost you love or belonging, and discover something that may surprise you. Saying no with love is not a withdrawal of care. It is one of the most honest things you can offer the people in your life and yourself. You are allowed to have needs. You are allowed to say no with kindness and without guilt. If you are not familiar with the tapping points, please begin with the short introductory video available on my Insight Timer profile before your first session.

Eft People Pleasing Self Acceptance Fear Self Worth Assertiveness Nervous System Self Care Breathing Emotional Freedom Technique Nervous System Regulation Breathing Technique

Meet your Teacher

Calgary, AB, Canada

Meet your Teacher

Calgary, AB, Canada

Transcript

You said yes again, When everything in you wanted to say no. Maybe it happened before you even had a chance to think. The request arrived. And the yes came out automatically. Trained. Familiar. Or maybe you felt a no rising in you. And then felt the fear rising faster. What if I disappoint someone? What if they think less of me? What if saying no cost me something I can't afford to lose? And so you said yes. Again. And somewhere inside, Something quietly contracted. This is your ETF tapping session for people pleasing. A few moments to acknowledge what it costs when you keep saying yes when you mean no. To release the fear that drives it. And to find your way back to the truth. That an honest no is not a withdrawal of love. It is an act of love. I invite you to find a comfortable position. Sitting somewhere. Let your body settle. Close your eyes if that feels comfortable. And take a slow breath in through your nose. And release it fully through your mouth. Another longer this time, Breathing in. And letting it go. Just notice for a moment what people-pleasing feels like in your body right now. Is there a tightness in your chest? A contraction around saying what you actually need. A steady exhaustion from giving so much and receiving so little in return. Just notice without judgment. Without needing to fix anything yet. On a scale of 0 to 10. Where Zero is completely free to say what is true for you. And 10 is the full weight of always putting everyone else first. What is your number right now? Just intuitively pick a number on that scale. Note where it is. We're going to bring it down. Bring your fingers to the karate chop point on the side of your hand and begin tapping and repeating after me. Even though I keep saying yes when I mean no. Even though I keep saying yes, Would I mean no? I deeply and completely accept myself. I deeply and completely accept myself. Even though I'm afraid of what happens if I disappoint someone. Even though I'm afraid of what happens if I disappoint someone. I choose to be gentle with myself today. I choose to be gentle with myself today. Even though I've been losing myself and what everyone else needs. Even though I've been losing myself and what everyone else needs. I'm willing to begin finding my way back now. I'm willing to begin finding my way back now. Stop tapping. Now bring your fingers to the inner edge of your eyebrows. And began tapping softly and repeating after me. All these yeses that are really nos. All these yeses that are really nos. Tapping on the side of the eye. The exhaustion of always putting everyone else first. The exhaustion of always putting everyone else first. Tappy under the eye. The fear of disappointing someone if I say what is actually true for me. The fear of disappointing someone. If I say what is actually true for me. Tappy under the nose. The belief that my needs matter less than everyone else's comfort. The belief that my needs matter less than everyone else's comfort. Tapping on the chin. The fear that saying no will cost me love or belonging. The fear that's saying no. Will cost me love or belonging. Tapping on the collarbone, All the times I lost myself in what someone else needed. All the times I lost myself in what someone else needed. Tapping under the arm, The weight of caring everyone else while quietly setting myself aside. The weight of caring everyone else while quietly setting myself aside. And tapping on the top of the head. This people-pleasing has been trying to keep me safe. But it has been costing me myself. This people-pleasing has been trying to keep me safe. But it has been costing me myself. Stop tapping. Take a slow breath in. And release it completely. As you breathe out, Letting go of stress and tension and worry. We're now going to move to the inner eyebrow again, Repeating after me as you tap. I am ready to release this pattern now. I am ready to release this pattern now. Tapping on the side of the eye, I release the fear of disappointing others when I speak my truth. I release the fear of disappointing others when I speak my truth. Tapping under the eye. Someone else's disappointment. Is not my responsibility to prevent. Someone else's disappointment is not my responsibility to prevent. Tapping under the nose. I am allowed to have needs. I am allowed to express them. I'm allowed to have needs. I'm allowed to express them. Tapping on the chin. Saying no is not a withdrawal of love. It is an act of honesty. Saying no is not a withdrawal of love. It is an act of honesty. Tapping on the collarbone. I release the belief that my worth depends on always saying yes. I release the belief that my worth depends on always saying yes. Tapping under the arm. I'm allowed to take up space. I am allowed to be honest. I am allowed to matter. I am allowed to take up space. I am allowed to be honest. I am allowed to matter. Tapping on the top of the head. I release the fear. That an honest no will cost me love. Real love does not require me to disappear. I release the fear that an honest no will cost me love. Real love does not require me to disappear. Stop tapping. Take a breath in. And release it slowly and completely. We now move into our final round of tapping. This one is around coming back to yourself. So starting with the inner eyebrow, Tapping and repeating after me. I am finding my way back to myself. I am finding my way back to myself. Tapping on the side of the eye. My needs matter. My truth matters. My yes and my no, Both matter. My needs matter. My truth matters. My yes and my no both matter. Tapping into the eye. I can disappoint someone and still be a good person. I can disappoint someone and still be a good person. Tapping under the nose. An honest no is an act of respect for myself and for the people I love. An honest no is an act of respect. For myself and for the people I love. Tapping on the chin. I choose myself today. Not instead of others, Alongside them. I choose myself today, Not instead of others, Alongside them. Tapping on the collarbone. I am allowed to say no with kindness and without guilt. I'm allowed to say no with kindness and without guilt. Tapping into the arm. I show up more fully. When I'm honest about what I can give. I show up more fully when I'm honest about what I can give. And tapping on the top of the head. I am enough without the yes. I belong without the yes. I am loved without the yes. I am enough without the yes. I belong without the yes. I am loved without the yes. Stop tapping. Take one more slow breath in. And let it go completely. Let your hands rest where they fall. Let your face soften. Let your jaw soften. Your shoulders drop. Your chest release. Let your whole body settle. Check back in with that number from 0 to 10. Where are you now? Notice the difference. That is your nervous system responding to a direct signal that it's safe to be honest. It is safe to have needs. It is safe to say no. If that number has not come down as much as you would like. Feel free to repeat this tapping sequence as often as you need. You have been giving so much for so long. And the people who truly love you do not need you to disappear in order to feel cared for. They need you. The real you. The honest you. The one who knows what she needs and is learning slowly and imperfectly to ask for it. That person is not selfish. That person is brave. Take one more breath. Slow. Easy. Complete. And carry that courage with you into the rest of your day.