When I'm meditating in a designated time and place,
I can feel a sense of calm and equanimity.
But when I am in a stressful situation at work or in public,
I often lose that sense of calm.
Do you have advice as to how I can bring the calm I feel in meditation over to other parts of my life?
You need a lot of practice to achieve that state.
You need a lot of practice to achieve that state.
It's actually very difficult for us to maintain equanimity,
Even sitting in a designated time and place that's quiet.
Our body may be still,
But our mind is always constantly searching out in the past or exploring further out into the future and never stays still.
That's why we want to harness the mind and make it stay still on the tip of our nose and become aware of the breath coming in and breath going out so that it doesn't flitter about.
And at this point,
We close our eyes in order to stop from external stimulation to further bother us and distract us.
But if we hear noises that are really noisy and loud,
It's very difficult to maintain the focus.
That's why if you're a beginner in meditation,
You have to find a place that's quiet and still.
Even if there's some noise in the external environment,
Whether it's from cicada,
From leaves rustling,
Or from water flowing,
That doesn't bother you as much.
However,
Noises from other people,
Sounds of speeches,
No matter how small they may be,
They can distract you immediately.
That's why we meditate in a place where there are no other people.
It's actually very difficult to maintain the focus and concentration even in those places where there are no other people.
But if we practice enough,
We can maintain that.
And if you're well practiced,
Then you want to challenge yourself and go to see whether you can do this meditation in a little noisier place.
After some level of practice,
You would have developed the capacity to maintain that equanimity,
Maintain the stillness of the mind in an environment where the externalities are quite noisy.
Next level is to practice doing this in midst of your everyday life.
It's very difficult for you to actually go about your everyday life,
Meeting people,
Shaking hands,
Seeing other people speak in real time,
And seeing into their eyes,
But maintaining the same stillness and quiet.
For this,
You're not focusing on the tip of your nose anymore.
You're focusing on the speech when the other person is saying something.
You're focusing on his eyes when that person is looking at you.
You're focusing on the touch when you're touching something.
You're not making value judgments as you do this,
Whether this is right,
Wrong,
Or good or bad.
You're just focusing on the sensation of the touch,
On the sensation of the look,
All the speech.
And if you develop the capacity to maintain that focus on the sight,
On the hearing,
On the touch,
Then you can maintain that equanimity in your everyday life.
This requires a lot of practice.
So it's a foolish question to ask whether a beginner driver can go in the middle of the city streets and do well in driving.
Because if you are a beginner driver,
First time you take in the wheel of a car,
You need to practice in the middle of a field,
Empty field,
Where there are no cars.
Then after you have gained some skill,
Then you need to go to a street where there are not a lot of cars to practice further.
And then you can go ahead advance enough to practice driving in a road with other cars.
So you need those steps to get to where you want to be.
Same thing with meditation.
So you're already thinking of trying to drive well in the middle of the New York city,
While you need to be able to practice first in a field that's empty of any streets.
So when you're practicing in the field,
In the empty field,
Focus and be faithful to that practice.
But your ultimate objective is not to drive well in an empty field,
It's to drive well in the middle of a city street.
The objective of your meditation is not for you to be able to sit still in a quiet place and time.
So your ultimate objective is to practice enough so you can do capacity building in your meditation so that you can actually apply this,
Maintain equanimity,
And you can be free from concerns and anxiety in your everyday life by being awake to your sense of touch,
Sight,
Hearing,
And taste.
So basically to summarize,
Your objective should be to maintain your equanimity in your everyday life.
But to get there,
You need a lot of practice and effort.
