Hello my friends.
My name is Sydney and today I have a meditation for you devoted to the shadow mother in all of us.
This is a meditation for anyone who resonates with the mother archetype or are looking to heal relationships with the mother,
Whether it's your own mother or the mother in you.
It's just love to the shadow mother.
I've written it in the style of meta or loving-kindness which is a style of meditation that's been clinically proven to connect us to the greater universal collective and decrease anxiety,
Help rest and depression as well as soothing the nervous system.
I'd like you to take a deep breath and let it out.
I hope you're finding yourself in a comfortable position and if you need to make any changes,
Whether you would like to be sitting against the wall or lying down or you're in the car,
Make sure that you can really attune to how your body feels in the space that you're in.
Take another breath.
This time fill up the walls of your body and sigh it all out.
Take another breath.
In filling up the walls,
Expanding the space within your body and letting it out.
As you're letting out the breath,
You're really grounding into your body.
Inhale deep breath and exhale.
I invite you to place your hands on your heart,
On your belly or anywhere that allows you to feel extra connected to the world that you're in.
Attune to the radiating energy of your heart,
Its pulses,
How your chest feels rising and falling with your breath.
Scan your bodies for any rhythms of movement or electricity,
Signs of life.
Imagine the energy of your heart flowing out of you,
Creating a puddle around you,
A puddle of energy.
Imagine that puddle growing wider and wider.
It starts to move away from the house that you're in,
From the room that you're in,
Spreading wider.
Your puddle of love spreading its way through your town,
Through your country,
Connecting you to all of the other puddles of love out there,
Like a sea of love.
And just like sound carries so easily across water,
So does your intention of love and compassionate understanding to all living beings on our planet.
Now we will send love to the shadow mother.
Love to the shadow mother.
I know her.
You know her.
You call her by your own name.
You call her by another name.
The one we only whisper about in the darkness,
The mother who is in all of us but isn't invited to the show,
The mother we pretend can't exist,
The mother we don't post about,
The oppressed mother,
The mother who bears the weight of a child in a world that feels broken,
The one who regrets,
The one who is afraid of the pain her child might suffer.
Love for the mother who wonders is this all there is.
Love for the mother who didn't expect it to be as hard as this,
To the one who can't find balance.
Love to the mother who wants to quit and to the ones that do.
Love to the mother who's silently suffocating and the one who's touched out.
Love to the mother who feels solo,
Separate,
Separated,
Who feels lied to,
Duped,
Desolate.
Love for the mother who's waiting for things to feel real and who wonders if they ever will.
Love for the mothers who grew up too fast,
The ones who feel bored and lonely with her child and the one who feels paralyzed.
Love for the mothers who are shameful and guilty.
Love to the mothers who feel trapped,
Confined to their beds,
Homes,
Routines,
Nap times,
Confined to their skin.
Love for the mother who wonders if she made a mistake.
Love for the mothers who want something else,
To the ones who didn't sign up for this,
To the ones who are doing it alone.
Love to the mother who's changed,
Who doesn't recognize herself,
Who can't turn her brain off and rest.
Love to the mother who has nothing left for her partner.
Love for the mother who feels broken,
Unsexy,
Messy,
Smelly,
Sweaty,
Hairy,
Lumpy,
Frumpy,
Ugly,
Bitter,
Lost and numb.
Love for the mother who wants desperately not to turn into her mother and who wonders if her child will love her,
The one who wonders if she loves her child as deeply as she's supposed to.
Love for the mother trying to do the right things,
The good things,
The gluten-free,
Vegan,
Free-range,
Wild,
Structured,
Sleep training things.
Love to the mothers who do their best and it's not enough.
Love to the mothers who forget,
Who shut off,
Who desperately need a break but feel they don't deserve it.
Love to the mother who can't afford it,
To the ones who go without,
The mothers who are terrified and hide it,
To the ones whose children's won't see their cracks,
To the ones whose children do see their cracks.
Love to the mother whose children resent them for being too human.
Love to the mothers who wonder if their children will call.
Love to the mothers who can't let go,
To the ones who cry in the shower.
Love for the mothers contemplating their own existence at three in the morning,
The ones who just once want to not run to their crying child.
Love for the mother who should be resting,
Should be sleeping,
Should be eating.
Love for the mother who shoulds.
Love for the mothers who feel hot fiery rage,
Who yell to feel heard,
Whose body betrayed them.
Love for the mother who is too small,
Too fat,
Too thin,
Too tall,
Too tired,
Too intense.
Love for the mother who needs help but can't speak.
The mother who doesn't know what she wants and is afraid of what she does.
Love for the mother who can't mother,
To the ones whose mothers wrecked things,
Did the wrong things,
To those who don't want to be a mother.
Love for the mother who raises someone else's child,
Who wonders if what she feels is normal because they aren't hers.
Love to the mother who wonders if she'll ever mother,
Who wonders if she'd miss it,
Who wonders if it's all it's said to be.
Love to the mother who knows things get better,
Longs for change.
Love to the mother who is in me,
In you,
In all of us.
The mother who needs it most of all.
Repeat silently after me.
For the shadow mother in all of us,
May she be seen,
May she be heard,
May she be honored.
For the shadow mother in all of us,
May she be seen,
May she be heard,
May she be honored.
For the shadow mother in all of us,
May she be seen,
May she be heard,
May she be honored.
Repeat silently after me.
Shadows and all,
May I know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Shadows and all,
May I know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Shadows and all,
May I know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Take a big breath in and out.
Maintain the connection with your puddle of love and repeat after me.
Shadows and all,
May my mother know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Shadows and all,
May my mother know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Shadows and all,
May my mother know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Feel your hand on your heart,
On your belly,
Or wherever you've placed it to to feel connection.
Scan through your puddle of love one last time,
And send our love out to mothers everywhere all over the world.
Repeat silently after me.
Shadows and all,
May all mothers everywhere know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Shadows and all,
May all mothers everywhere know love,
Feel happiness,
And live in peace.
Shadows and all,
May all mothers everywhere know love,
Feel happiness,
And feel peace.
Breathe in and out.
Feel into your body being supported by the ground.
Notice your heartbeat.
Notice how your body shifts and moves with every breath that you take.
Imagine you're connected to all beings,
Imagine you're connected to all beings everywhere.
You are them,
They are you.
We are all one.
Thank you for meditating today.
