So,
Let's start with our short ceremony.
Let's sit comfortably on our seat.
Let's take a deep breath in and let go.
Let's close our eyes and take another deep breath in and let go.
And the next breath in we keep in,
We don't breathe out.
And slowly breathe out.
Let go.
Let go of all your efforts.
Let go of everything that already happened in the past.
Let go of everything that may happen in the future.
And allow your breath to guide you back to the present moment.
To whatever is happening right now around you and within you.
Become aware of any sensation you may feel pleasant or unpleasant.
Become aware of any thought you may think without getting too entangled and carried away.
Just observe as those thoughts come and go.
Become aware of any emotion you may be experiencing.
Whatever it is,
Let it be.
You just observe.
Restful and alert.
Be aware of all those things that are happening around you and within you.
And as you observe this constant movement,
Allow your consciousness to expand,
To include all things happening.
Allow it to expand,
To include everything your imagination can grasp.
Without any effort,
Allow it to expand more and more.
So that everything that was ever created and everything that will one day be destroyed is included.
Allow it to expand even further.
So it will include the beginning of all time and the end of all time.
Allow your consciousness to expand more and more.
Until it transcends all space and time.
Until all the action turns into stillness.
Until all the noise turns into silence.
And there is nothing left but silence.
You are that.
Another deep breath in.
Allow your breath to guide you back to your body.
That is seated here upon its seat.
A part of our virtual circle.
Let's unite our individual intentions into one unified intention.
The intention to grow,
To develop,
To evolve.
With a smile,
Let's take another deep breath in.
And when you feel comfortable,
You may open your eyes.
So,
Hello again everyone.
Welcome to this unique opportunity we give ourselves to hold hands and walk the path together.
Supporting each other's growth.
And remembering that what propels our movement forward on the path is the tension that hides between the question and the answer.
So the more sincere and meaningful question you bring,
The further we grow on the path.
So what did you want to discuss today?
Is there anything you feel that is holding you back?
That is a hurdle?
A weight that you would like to get rid of?
Or any other reason for you to be here?
Just to be charged with some unconditional love?
Whatever.
Now is the time to share.
Parper says the listed fear,
The listed topic is fear of rejection.
I was looking forward to that discussion.
Fear of rejection.
Why are we afraid of rejection?
Same reason as every problem we have in our life.
It's always the same reason.
There is only one reason for our misery.
And that is lack of self-awareness.
Very good,
Barbara.
You see,
You already know.
You don't need me.
We don't know who we are,
So what we do is we go and ask other people.
Maybe you know who I am.
We look for approval.
We look for confirmation.
Affirmation.
What other people think about me becomes extremely important when we don't know who we are.
You can see it with teenagers,
Where they are just building their identity.
Trying to figure out their place in the world.
How important it is for them what other people,
Other kids think about them.
It becomes everything.
Children can commit suicide because they were rejected at class or something.
There was a boycott.
It becomes a life and death situation.
Other people's opinions become.
.
.
The compilation of that becomes our identity.
This is who I am.
If other people think that I am good,
Then apparently I am good.
If they think that I am bad,
Then apparently I am bad.
Everything has to do with what other people think.
And what we learn here is,
Don't be a football of other people's opinions.
This is what I learned from my teacher,
Shri Sri Ravi Shankar.
You know,
Other people's opinions are not important.
And there is no way you can really make everybody around you happy.
Please everyone.
It's impossible.
If you still hang up on other people's opinions,
You keep spending your time trying to make everybody around you happy and satisfied.
It's impossible.
Because if you are able to do it on this side,
People on that side are now complaining,
Where are you?
We need your attention.
Or you are not doing enough.
So you run to the other side and try to make those people happy.
And so these people are now complaining.
You become like those clowns that are circling plates on a stick.
You know those?
And they are just running from one side of the stage to the other and trying to keep those plates up in the air.
This is not the way to live.
So what to do?
Let go of the idea that other people know who you are.
Determine who you are.
Instead,
You take that responsibility.
You take that energy that you spend on trying to make other people happy and content about you.
And use it to know yourself.
And I tell you,
Once you know who you are,
Who you really are,
Other people will be happy.
It's a natural outcome.
They will come to you and say,
I want that.
Where did you get that?
Smile.
Where did you get that spark in your eyes?
This is what I want.
You become very attractive.
But you don't care anymore.
It's not about keeping other people happy.
Your happiness.
You be happy.
You be unconditionally happy.
Regardless of whatever is happening around you.
And you spread that.
Peace and love and joy.
This is your contribution.
Otherwise you will never be free.
You will always be a victim of other people's opinions.
Rejection.
If somebody does not accept me,
What does it mean about me?
Am I not good enough?
Am I not worthy?
It's a disease,
I tell you.
It's the plague of the 21st century.
People not having self-worth because of lack of self-knowledge.
People believe that they are not worthy of everything that they hope for.
So they keep sabotaging their own progress.
They don't believe they truly are worthy of that happiness and success.
How to overcome it?
Know yourself.
Then you realize there is nothing in there that you should be apologetic about.
Nothing.
Nothing out there that you should excuse.
You are a fantastic,
Complete,
Perfect expression of the Divine.
And there is nothing you need to add to that.
You are already an expression of perfection.
You are never lacking anything.
And there is nothing out there that you really need.
This is the truth.
The question is,
Are you dreaming unconsciously?
Or are you awake?
That's it.
Is there a way to become conscious of the things that we aren't aware of?
Like they say,
You don't know what you don't know.
And then you can know what you don't know.
And then you can know what you know.
You know,
I like to make things very simple,
As simple as possible.
So,
To simplify our complex personality and the forces that are driving us and that are holding us back,
As you said,
Not always we are conscious about what is driving us or what is holding us back.
Sometimes these forces are hidden.
But it's always telling through the body.
The body can be a black-mousse paper in that sense.
Because it doesn't matter if the forces that are driving you forward or holding you back now are conscious or unconscious.
They reflect in your body.
And you know that you are driven by fear,
By a sense of lack,
By disharmony,
By feverishness,
When your body is contracted.
Right?
And when your body is loose and relaxed,
Comfortable,
Then you know that you are free of those emotions.
And unconditional love can express itself through you.
When?
When your body is restful in any situation.
So,
Again,
To make things as simple as possible,
You can always observe your body and learn from the way it interacts with reality.
If you feel that your body is contracted,
Your breath,
You know,
Is here,
The fifth chakra,
You know,
Always involved.
The breath is not moving in and out smoothly.
You feel that your breath is somehow stuck.
Or you know,
The second chakra,
You feel there is like a fist in your lower belly.
No?
You know that feeling?
Or there is some heaviness on your heart.
Then you know that you are not truly available to experience the present moment.
You are somehow rejecting it or afraid of it.
Or the opposite side of the same coin,
You are trying to hold on to it,
Afraid that it will change.
Right?
So,
If you are not sure about the nature of the force that is currently driving you,
Just observe your body and your breath.
They will tell you.
If you are comfortable and relaxed and the breath is moving smoothly through the fifth chakra,
Then you know.
There is no fear masking your vision.
Now.
So,
The fear of rejection.
You just need to keep reminding yourself again and again that what other people think about you has no consequence.
Nothing to do with who you truly are.
And now it is just a matter of keep reminding that to yourself.
Next time you find yourself trying to please,
Trying to play a part,
So other people find you more attractive and more acceptable,
And you are actually moving away from who you really are because you believe that who you are as you are is not what they expect or they want to see,
Then you keep reminding yourself,
No,
No,
No,
No,
I don't need that.
What other people think about me has got nothing to do with who I am.
I don't want to spend energy on that anymore.
So you come back to your present moment.
Come back to yourself.
Take a deep breath.
Remind yourself,
No,
No,
I don't need that.
I don't need to be artificial.
I don't need to play a part.
I want to be authentic.
And if other people don't accept that,
Then I accept them.
Not accepting me.
Do you see what I am saying?
Last discussion,
I think this came up because somebody had a question about the guilt or shame of events that happened in the past,
Maybe things that they had done to loved ones that made those people push them away and reject.
So when there is a situation of feeling rejected because of something that you've done to cause that to happen,
Where do we go?
How do we find peace in that?
Yeah,
We spoke about it last meeting.
You just keep reminding yourself again and again that any action,
Any decision you make or other people make is because that's the best decision you could make at that time.
That's it.
Even if it was an expression of your own stress and suffering and disharmony,
Of course it will manifest as disharmony around you.
But that's the best you could do at that time.
That's the best everybody can do in a given situation.
Next time somebody is facing you,
Shouting,
Criticizing you and your actions and your decisions,
You remember this is the best they can do.
They are a slave of their own intellect,
Making opinions about an imaginary reality they believe should have existed instead of the actual reality that happens.
And the same with you.
If you make a decision,
If you inadvertently hurt people that you love,
Just remind yourself.
You did that because this is the best you could do at that time.
And you use that as additional motivation to grow beyond ignorance.
Add additional self-knowledge more and more.
Become more and more aware in real time and keep choosing an open heart and a willing soul over everything else.
Being right,
Winning an argument.
I prefer an open heart,
Again and again.
That's it.
If you keep judging yourself because of things that you've done in the past,
What happens is you're stuck in the fifth level of existence,
Which is me and my story.
You believe you need to fix your story.
And until this story is fixed,
You cannot move forward,
You cannot be free.
There are two essential mistakes here.
A.
The story is never wrong.
And B.
You are not your story.
It doesn't matter how terrible the story may have been.
It's not wrong.
It's not a mistake.
There's nothing to fix.
And it's not who you are.
You are free,
Regardless of the story.
You are free now,
Regardless of the story.
The story is just a path that goes through the forest.
You are the space that includes the whole forest and all the paths that go through it.
This lifetime you walk on this path,
And another lifetime you walk on a parallel path.
Sometimes those paths are crossing.
And there is so much scenery to be seen and views to observe.
But you are that space that holds everything.
All the forests in the world.
This is who you are.
You can't be identified with a specific path and be free.
You have to grow beyond that identification.
I am not my story.
If you want to go deep into that knowledge,
I urge you to listen to that seven layers of existence course.
Know thyself.
All those talks that start with know thyself.
I am not my body.
I am not my breath.
I am not my mind.
I am not my intellect.
I am not my story.
I am not my ego.
Listen to those again and again.
Don't worry about things that you have done and people that you have hurt.
Don't try to rectify that.
Stop judging yourself.
Stop judging your reality and the people that you meet.
Let go of that.
You are bigger than that.
Forgive yourself.
And continue.
Continue choosing an open heart.
Otherwise you are stuck.
That's it.
Do you think there is a place for reparations?
Can you say forgive yourself or forgive others?
Does that have a doing to it?
Is there a place for making amends or reparations?
I mean if you feel it is necessary,
Do it.
The best gift that you can give the world,
The best gift that you can give your loved ones,
The best gift that you can give your enemies,
Is your open heart.
Your unconditional love.
That's it.
You cannot give more than that.
You can say I am sorry a thousand times.
But if you keep on latching on to them for their opinions about you,
Asking them for approval,
Giving them this responsibility of making you feel worthy,
You are still a parasite.
You can say I am sorry a thousand times.
But if you feel it is necessary,
Do it.
Do it with an open heart.
Say I am sorry I was ignorant.
I didn't mean to hurt.
That's how it was manifested.
I choose to stay with an open heart.
I hope you can do the same.
Jai Gurudev.
It seems like that could take a lot of patience with yourself and maybe with other people if that person is an important person in your life or hard to avoid or something.
That if you leave it at that and they continue to dwell in that story and you are ready to grow beyond that,
That to continue to have that compassion and understanding for where they are can take a lot of patience.
No.
Compassion is your nature.
Compassion doesn't take energy away.
Compassion is what you are.
It is the material that you are made of.
If you want to feel compassionate,
I tell you,
Just know yourself.
Go back to self-knowledge.
Don't try to enforce compassion or forgiveness.
This will take energy for sure.
Why?
Because you still have that idea that this person made a mistake.
So now you are graceful enough to give him your forgiveness.
I mean,
Good for you.
You are so noble.
No,
No.
Let go of the idea that this man,
This person was wrong,
That he made a mistake.
Reality doesn't make mistakes.
Sometimes people are very nasty,
Cruel.
But this is because of ignorance.
And sometimes ignorance is there.
What can you do?
It's not a mistake.
Let go of the idea it was a mistake.
And come back to the present moment with an open heart.
Instead of trying to find energy to forgive and feel compassionate,
Come back to self-knowledge and compassion will express itself through you.
Naturally.
When you see somebody suffering and acting out of suffering,
You feel compassion.
It's the nature of things.
Not even your nature.
It's the nature of reality.
What do you say?
Come on,
Share your questions.
Don't be shy.
Just next time when you find yourself trying to please somebody else,
Because you are dependent on their observation of you,
Because you feel you need their approval,
Their affirmation,
Remind yourself you don't.
You are free of that dependency.
Free yourself from it.
You are yourself.
And you don't need to ask other people who you are anymore.
They can accept or reject.
It's their thing,
Not yours.
If they accept,
They can grow.
If they reject,
They are stuck.
You feel compassionate about that.
You see,
When you accept,
You can grow.
When you reject,
You are stuck.
You are stuck.
Life continues and you are stuck because you reject.
Isn't it?
They say in the levels of consciousness,
When you get into courage,
Above courage,
Things really start to expand and grow.
You have to explain those levels of consciousness.
The levels of consciousness?
I would have to look it up again,
But there are different English words in this one for the different levels of consciousness.
But there is something about the level at courage that once you.
.
.
The reason it came into my mind is it seems that sometimes in these situations when you want to grow beyond something,
It takes courage.
It takes courage to make those decisions to really change something in your life or to move beyond your story to do whatever it is that you need to do.
It takes courage because you take back responsibility for your own happiness.
You are not a victim anymore about what other people think and do.
You are not a victim of your reality,
The reality that you meet,
The circumstances that you experience.
And that takes courage because it's very easy to put yourself in this victim position and use that as an excuse why you are miserable.
This is what we do as humanity.
Think about it.
Most of the social gatherings that we have,
We just discussed this a few hours ago,
People are so programmed to justify each other's drama and suffering.
The world,
The situation,
The politics,
The economy,
Everything is out there as an excuse why we are unable to feel free and happy.
And taking back that responsibility,
Saying,
Realizing,
No,
No,
It's nothing to do with the circumstance.
Either I am responsible for my own happiness and expand it through self-knowledge,
That I empower myself back.
This takes courage,
For sure.
Accepting that.
They say with power comes responsibility.
No,
With responsibility comes power.
So these levels of consciousness are from Transcending the Levels of Consciousness by David Hawkins.
So it starts out at the bottom.
It's an inverse triangle.
So shame,
Guilt,
Apathy,
Grief,
Fear,
Desire,
Anger,
Pride,
And then courage takes you into the fourth dimension.
And then you're in neutrality,
Willingness,
Acceptance,
Inner light.
Inner light jumps you to the next level.
Inner light,
Inner wisdom,
Inner love.
And then it keeps going.
Once you get to self-realization,
Oneness,
Presence,
Non-duality,
Awareness,
The great void,
Divine grace and love union,
Super causal truth and full consciousness at the top,
Into the 12th dimension.
By the time you get to awareness and the great void,
You're enlightened.
I'm sure all that sounds very complicated.
It's a lot of levels and words,
But I just find it really interesting that courage is the place that gets us out of that third dimension.
There's like a propulsion there.
Yeah.
In my book,
I ask what are the qualities that are required from a sincere seeker to successfully walk the path.
And the two qualities I mentioned there is honesty and courage.
Like in this poster,
Courage and honesty.
Without them,
There is no progress,
No true progress.
You have to take back responsibility.
And you have to be honest.
You cannot keep lying to yourself or to the world.
And when you say,
I want to be free,
You have to mean it and put it on the top of your priorities.
Otherwise,
You just keep lying.
Do you think that lying has something to do with being unconscious?
Like when we tell ourselves these stories,
Which can also be interpreted as lies,
Is that part of the unconscious mind?
Like if you really believe in your story and you really believe in what somebody else might see as a lie,
There has to be a level of where you're just,
You're not conscious of that holding you back or that preventing you from growing.
Again,
If you're not conscious about the forces that drives you or holds you back,
The best place to start looking is your body.
I try to make things as simple as possible,
Not to make it too complicated because then we are lost in ideas and concepts.
This 12,
How many stations?
12 dimensions and God knows how many steps there are in this ladder.
I try to make it as simple as possible.
Either you love what you experience or you suffer.
That's it.
If you want to reach this level of awakening or whatever you call it,
If you want to experience an awakened consciousness,
You stop rejecting.
You stop arguing,
You stop fighting,
You stop letting fears guide you and you are constantly available,
Loving whatever is being experienced.
That's it.
You are enlightened.
Enlightened people love what they have,
What they experience.
That's it.
It doesn't have to be more complicated than that.
And how do you know that you love?
You feel it in your body.
Your body is there,
Available,
Open.
Your breath is smooth and relaxed.
And you feel it in your heart.
Your heart is blossoming,
Right?
It's a physical sensation.
As long as you have a body and a breath,
You can position yourself there.
Barbara says,
So it seems that rejection is in part what creates the gap.
100%.
Rejection is the gap.
The gap between what is and what I believe it should have been.
So I don't accept reality,
I reject it.
I need a different reality to be happy.
So in essence,
If you feel rejection,
You are putting yourself in that gap.
If you feel that you are rejected by other people,
That's not a problem.
It becomes a problem when you argue with the fact that they reject you.
People can accept you or reject you,
Whatever.
It's their business.
Why is it a problem?
If you are not a slave to their opinion anymore,
Like we discussed,
It's not a problem if you feel they reject.
It's okay.
It becomes a problem for you when you believe they should accept,
Not reject.
When will you be happy?
When they accept.
Okay,
Now you're stuck.
Some people say,
What you're asking is too much.
I was rejecting and now you expect me to love?
The stretch is too much.
So there is one middle point that I can recommend before going all the way to love,
Honestly and truthfully,
Your present moment.
And that is to accept.
Accepting the present moment.
Once you accept it,
It's easier to love it.
Because there is no rejection anymore.
And how to accept the present moment?
By realizing that it is inevitable.
The present moment is already happening.
That's it,
Too late.
Whether you like it or not,
Whether it fits your plans or contradicts it,
Whether your ideas about it are positive or negative.
It has nothing to do with all of that.
It's just happening.
That's it,
Too late.
If you are here experiencing now,
You realize that whatever is now is inevitable.
So the only sane option for you is to accept it.
Accept people and situations as they are.
It's another sentence from Shishir Avishankar.
If you accept,
Then it's easier to fall in love again.
You see the grace in everything.
Every situation is an expression of grace.
Even the most horrific,
It's an experience that you have the opportunity to emerge in,
To unite with,
To bring your awakened consciousness to.
Then you justify the reason that you are here for.
Has this become too philosophical?
You've been very quiet today.
Other than Barbara,
There are no questions.
Did we resolve the rejection issue?
Or is there anything else we need to refer to?
Barbara says,
Well,
Thank you for holding my hand.
I appreciate both of you.
Thank you for justifying our existence.
Cassie says,
This has resonated so much.
Kiara,
Say if you are rejected for no reason and you care for that person.
If you really care,
Really,
Truly care for that person,
Drop your expectations.
Drop your conditions.
Learn to accept and love them as they are,
With all their weaknesses,
With all their warts and all.
Ignorance,
With all their ignorance,
Lack of self-knowledge.
Remember,
People are not intending to do bad or to harm you.
They just give you the best they can according to the level of awareness that they are in,
In a giving situation.
So instead of being angry or disappointed,
You just love them as they are.
See the grace in their eyes.
Even if those eyes are filled with suffering,
Judgment,
Even if it's hate you see there,
There is always love behind the hate.
Always.
You cannot hate something you don't love.
Isn't it so?
This might be opening a can of worms,
But.
.
.
I'm just thinking of Kiara's question and if this person that you care for very much is,
Say,
A significant other,
Particularly,
Or somebody who you need to live with or be in physical proximity with,
I can imagine it's very difficult to continue to accept that person where they are because it creates a barrier to intimacy,
Which is often what people are seeking,
That connection.
So it makes that closeness difficult to achieve.
And particularly if it's a significant other,
I can see how people would feel that the only way out of that is to separate and be able to find that close connection with somebody else who can match at that same level.
It wasn't exactly a question,
But.
.
.
I wonder about maybe launching this into a next topic in terms of intimacy and close relationships where that comes into play.
Why people choose to be with each other and why people choose to leave each other.
Apparently I did open a can of worms because now everybody's talking.
What are they saying?
Ki says,
Or Kai,
Ki,
Kai,
I'm just joining,
Happy to be here,
Hello.
Lori says,
I do not believe that all people give the best they can,
So that's a big stumbling block for me,
But I stay open to hearing what you're saying.
At least you recognize that this is a stumbling block for you.
You put it there,
You put it there,
And you can remove it,
Only you,
By changing the disc.
If you believe that people are intentionally bad and harmful,
Then this is the reality you create for yourself.
I suppose you only think that they're not giving the best because you have expectations.
Is this how you see it?
Think about it.
People can only give you the best they can at any giving situation.
They cannot give you anything else.
According to the level of awareness,
They are in a giving situation.
That's it.
If they are engulfed with opinion and judgment and frustration and anger and violence,
This is what they can give you.
They cannot give you anything else.
Because they aren't giving you anything else.
That's it.
This is the reality.
That's the reality of it.
And if they are operating because of all this misery and suffering,
The only thing for you to do is embrace it with compassion.
You can see somebody there is suffering,
And you know,
Spread this suffering around him,
This harmony.
What can you do but be compassionate about that?
Remember,
You are bigger than that,
Bigger than anything life can throw at you.
Even if it's miserable,
Even if it's terrible,
Nothing about you can be destroyed by a circumstance.
Not really.
You are always bigger than anything you can experience,
Good or bad.
So,
Free yourself from that condition to only feel what is safe and pleasant.
Only experience the good and avoid the bad.
This is not how an awakened consciousness meets life.
If you want to grow towards awakened consciousness,
You have to grow beyond that reflex.
Joe said,
My parents ignored me,
But not my elder brother and elder sister.
I do not know why and how to overcome this.
I feel like I have stopped living because for me my parents were and are my everything,
My world,
My breath.
I need help to move forward.
I have no expectations from them but their love.
No,
You don't need their love.
Let go of this idea.
Do you know how I know for sure?
You want help to get over that?
I'm going to give you a sentence that's going to change your life from this moment onwards.
But only if you embrace it and accept this.
Everybody's ears are perked up.
Are you willing?
Are you willing?
What you don't have,
You don't need.
What you don't have,
You don't need.
Because if you really needed it,
You'd have it.
And then you wouldn't need it anymore.
That feel of lack.
I need,
I want,
Without that I'm incomplete.
I cannot be happy,
I cannot be fulfilled.
This is the ego,
This is ignorance.
Reality gives you everything you need already.
And if you didn't get it,
You don't need it.
And you need to let go of the idea that this is something that is necessary and without it you are incomplete.
That's never the case.
I apologize,
I need to leave.
And this is just one example of many,
Many,
Many reasons we give ourselves for why we are a victim of a circumstance.
Victim of our story,
Our parents,
The education system,
Whatever.
The monetary system.
There is always a reason why we are a victim of life.
And this is never the case.
If you really want to be free,
If you really want to walk on this path towards an awakened consciousness,
I tell you,
Let go of those ideas.
Come back to the present moment.
Embrace it,
Accept it,
Love it.
Be available to fully experience it with no rejection,
No agenda.
And you will find you are that already.
Everything you hoped for,
You are that.
Unconditionally.
Good,
Good,
Good.
Ponder about that.
And homework for the next few days is use your body as this luck-mousse paper.
Make sure that you are aware when your body is contracted and rejecting again.
You have an opinion,
You have an idea contradicting reality,
And you prefer that idea.
That's it,
You're lost.
So you come back again and again reminding yourself,
No,
No,
No,
No,
No,
I prefer an open heart.
And you let go of that contraction,
Let go.
Come back to the present moment.
Bring your smile,
Bring your grace,
Bring that spark in your eyes.
Your open heart,
Your unconditional love.
This is it.
There is nothing else to do.
What do you say?
Yes or no?
Good,
Good,
Good.
So we're going to meet again this Saturday,
12 p.
M.
,
Mountain Time,
Wherever you are on the planet.
Any advice on acceptance?
Yes,
Use it as much as possible.
And when you find you cannot accept,
You look for the idea that you have in your mind,
That is trying to convince you that reality was mistaken and you are right.
And when you allocate that idea,
Drop it.
Come back to the present moment.
And thank you for your time and your beautiful questions.
And your donations are very helpful.
So click on that donate button and put something back,
Just to make sure that you are balanced.
You're not only getting,
You're also giving.
And we'll meet again in a few days.
Bring your friends.
Let's make a party out of it,
What do you say?
So good night wherever you are.
Love you very much.
See you soon.
