It's summer,
You made it,
But not because you pushed hard enough,
Not because you finally became the version of you the world was waiting for,
But because you let winter do its work,
Because you protected the fragile green of your spring,
Because you trusted the season even when you couldn't see where it was taking you.
And now,
Now there is light,
A different type of light,
The kind of light that reaches you all the way in,
The kind the body recognises before the mind even has word for it.
Something in you that was contracted is opening.
But one word of care,
Summer is not the beach and the escape,
The final place of break from the real world.
It is not the performance of your highest self for the audience that has been waiting to see what you can do.
It is not the proof that the winter was worth it or the justification of the journey,
The destination you are always driving towards.
Summer,
Summer is not the reward,
Summer is a season with its own intelligence,
Its particular quality of living,
Its own invitation not to escape your life,
But to be more fully inside of it than you have ever been in any other season.
Look at the trees in summer,
Not performing,
No audience for it to flower to,
No version of itself it is straining to become,
It is simply fully expressing what it has grown into.
The roots went deep in winter,
The shoot found its way through in spring,
And now the whole system,
Resourced,
Stable,
Nourished all the way down,
Overflows,
Not because it is trying to,
Because it cannot help it,
But because it is living what living things do when they are genuinely tended to.
It becomes completely itself,
And here is the thing about the light,
Every leaf in the forest receives the same sun,
The same light falls on every living thing,
But notice that no two leaves make the same shade of green,
The light does not decide the colour,
You do,
Your particular living,
Your specific root system,
Your unique way of drawing water,
The particular history of every season you have moved through,
All of it,
It is here it meets the light,
And makes something that never existed before,
And will never exist again,
Your shade,
Your shade of green,
The only one that you can make,
This is what summer is asking of you,
Not to perform,
Not to be visible,
Or prove anything to anyone including you,
But summer is here to teach,
To just receive the light,
And let it call forward what is uniquely and irreplaceably yours,
Your particular aliveness,
Your particular vibrancy,
The way you move,
When you are finally resourced enough to move freely,
Summer is not about being the brightest leaf in the forest,
But it is about being so fully your own shade of green,
That you forget to check what colour anyone else is making,
And the action that comes from this place,
It feels different,
You will know it when it arrives,
Because it won't feel like pushing,
It won't feel like striving,
It will feel like overflow,
Like something that wanted to move,
Finally having enough room to move in,
Like words that have been waiting to find voice,
Finding space to speak,
Like direction that was always true,
Finally having a body resourced enough to walk in,
This is the action of summer,
Not the tight,
Monitored,
Always watching itself action of someone performing under pressure,
No,
But summer is the loose,
Natural,
Inevitable action of the living thing,
Doing what living things do when they are fully alive,
You are not performing your summer,
You are living it,
There is a difference and your body knows it,
Performance watches itself,
Performance manages itself,
Performance is always half present,
Because half of it is watching the audience to see if it is enough,
But you see here in summer we live with aliveness,
And aliveness doesn't watch anything,
It just moves,
Creates,
Expresses,
Not because someone is looking,
But because this is what it feels like to be fully inside your own becoming,
Your own transforming,
And that word becoming,
That word transforming,
Stay with it for one moment,
Because summer is not arrival,
The tree at full summer is not the finished tree,
It is not the completed final destination version of what the tree was always trying to be,
But it is the tree in this particular season,
Expressing the fullness of everything grown into so far,
Next year,
Next year the roots will go deeper,
Next summer will be richer,
Because of what this one grew,
You are not arriving in summer,
You are living the most embodied moment of a journey that never stops,
The most fully yourself you have yet been,
Not the most fully yourself you will ever be,
So receive this season,
Not as proof of something,
Not as performance,
Not as the version of you the world has been waiting for,
But as the natural,
Inevitable,
Beautiful,
Specific expression of the living thing,
That was tended through winter,
Protected through spring,
And has arrived here,
Full of light,
Full of its own particular colour,
Full of aliveness that has always been waiting inside the becoming,
Not for the audience,
But for the pure,
Simple,
Profound experience of being fully alive,
In your own skin,
In your own season,
In your own irreplaceable shade of green,
This is your summer,
Not the one the world designed,
Not the one the world looks at,
And looks like everyone else's,
But yours,
The one only you can grow into,
The one only your particular roots,
Your particular winter,
Your particular spring could have made possible,
That is enough,
It has always been enough,
And underneath the green,
Underneath the light and the fullness,
And the particular vibrancy of this season,
Your original colour is still there,
Patient,
Unhurried,
Waiting for autumn,
To finally bring it home.
