Lesson 10 Essence Beloved Community We'll begin with a meditation.
When I am still and you are still,
We are one stillness together.
After this work to understand ourselves,
To heal ourselves,
To be compassionate to ourselves,
After all this longing to find our essence,
We realize this is lonely work.
One night the moon is out at 3 am,
Shining in the window and down on our lonely countenance.
Now,
Knowing more than ever that no one can lead a life of essence for us,
The loneliness sets in.
And yet,
I am not the only one.
As we saw in the practice of meditation and prayer and art,
As soon as we sit down and soften our gaze,
We are not alone.
I join with spiritual teachers and mystics,
Ancient and modern,
To say that we never have been alone.
And we will never be alone.
Even dying alone in the desert or far out at sea,
We are never alone.
Eventually,
Like it or not,
We feel others around us,
Our beloved community.
In the early days of the AIDS epidemic,
A group of us here in Maine started the AIDS Project.
Back then,
Maine families were faced with very sick sons moving back to Maine for end-of-life care.
We planned support groups for people living with HIV and their friends and family members.
Only two people showed up at that first night,
But we had begun.
We were part of a reluctant community,
But a community nonetheless.
We affirmed that in the face of intolerance,
We could create safety.
We lived among ignorance,
But we could create healing,
If not always physically,
Then emotionally and spiritually.
Years later,
At the AIDS Day Memorial Service,
I stood in the high wooden pulpit of the old stone Unitarian Universalist Church in downtown Portland.
The people living with AIDS,
Their friends,
Families and caregivers were a newly bonded community,
Gathered together to remember and grieve those we had already lost and were now losing.
Many of the families and caregivers sat in front of me.
A minister and then an AIDS Project staff member spoke.
Then the police chief stepped up to speak.
We felt fortunate he was willing to advocate for tolerance and acceptance.
His support enlarged and strengthened our community.
When it came my turn,
I spoke of our new community and how we came together to hear our stories and share our natural emotions,
To share our suffering.
A year or two later,
When the AIDS quilt came to another local church,
We silently walked the aisles between the colorful panels,
Then read the names of those who had died.
In that personal ritual,
We not only came together again as a community,
But also included those who were no longer with us in physical form,
Our larger community across time and space.
Many of us have a deeply human wish,
A longing to belong to a community of souls where we feel safe and secure.
We long to be our true selves,
Show our natural emotions,
Live authentic lives,
And live not only free of judgments,
But also deliciously affirmed by others for being who we really are.
No pretense,
Just essence.
Before we are able to create this beloved community,
Or even accept the communities we are a part of already,
It helps to make peace,
Or at least working agreements,
With the various interior parts of ourselves that clamor for attention.
This is our inner community of social roles along with their rules.
We can ask permission from our controller,
Our judge,
Our victim,
Our caretaker,
Our seeker,
Our follower,
Our finder,
Our wise sage,
Our innocent child,
Our skeptic,
And our fearful self,
Among others.
Quite a crowd!
We can then enter a series of negotiations with self and others to leave the role-playing of the victim triangle behind,
And to inhabit our more healthy and authentic selves,
That is,
To live from within.
We want to live from our essence.
This inner work to find and define our authentic self beyond social roles is the foundation for any true community.
As we become more authentic,
More our essential selves,
We are able to plant our seeds of community in the fallow,
Waiting field of potential community.
When I look a friend in the eye,
Pick up my phone and call,
When I text,
Email,
Write a card,
Make a date for lunch,
I am providing the nourishment of sun and rain,
The heat and moisture of growth and connection.
These days,
For me,
All are electronic,
Instant means of connection,
While helpful,
Never substitute for face-to-face,
Eye-to-eye contact,
And being close enough to touch physically if we are so moved.
A hug can create community.
The lesson here is to trust our instincts.
The reasons we take the initiative to reach out and seek community are valid,
Yet may not result in what we envision.
Something else may be created.
Because we seek in order to find,
Our community is born out of our intention,
Our creativity,
Or longing and passion.
We can imagine our possible community,
See the potential first,
Then create it.
We will create our beloved community from two sources.
One is the knowledge that connections already exist,
And we can embrace them.
The second source is the active creative process and work to initiate and sustain relationships with like-souled people.
Just as a key to leaving the victim triangle is summoning the courage to make the journey away from playing our outdated roles,
So is the creation of your beloved community,
Summoning the courage to be your true self.
Yes,
The world is often lonely,
Yet as you deepen your trust in your true self,
You will attract community members to you.
Remember to allow astonishment and openness to the possibilities of new members showing up from unfamiliar places.
They can arrive in new ways,
Surprise us with their availability,
Their numbers,
And their love for us.
I want to share a personal story.
I remember when the little kids at Collins Brook School,
The alternative school I founded,
Experienced what for many of them was their first loss.
The classroom pet,
A gerbil named Queen Elizabeth,
Had died.
The small community of eight or so classmates,
Ages five to eight,
Created their own funeral ritual.
For the hearse,
They used a red wagon padded with hay and loaded with their stuffed animals.
They dressed up Queen Elizabeth in a red and white ruffled dress and lay her softly on the hay in the wagon.
They surrounded her with their favorite stuffed animals,
Teddy bears,
Dogs,
And cats.
Then the kids proceeded to pull a funeral wagon out of their classroom across the lawn and into the middle school English class.
They didn't pause,
Just paraded through and went right back out the door.
The little kids were quiet and a bit afraid to enter the teenager's classroom,
But they did so anyway.
The older kids stopped what they were doing and watched,
Surprised,
As the wagon was pulled right down the middle of their tables and chairs.
Then the funeral procession made its way over to the school kitchen and dining room.
Again,
They went right through the middle of the room.
Eventually,
The kids pulled Queen Elizabeth's wagon back outside and across the lawn to a shady spot under a tree.
With determination,
They dug a hole.
Some used shovels,
Some used their wagons.
They argued quietly how big the hole should be.
When they decided it was the right size,
Two of them tenderly unloaded Queen Elizabeth from the wagon and gently laid her in the hole.
One child said,
Goodbye,
Queen Elizabeth.
Thank you.
All of them took turns putting the dirt carefully on top of her body.
That was it.
They were done.
They returned to their classroom.
The next day,
It turned out that one of their classmates had been sick the day before and had missed Queen Elizabeth's funeral.
So,
Because they knew that he too loved Queen Elizabeth,
The kids,
With his help,
Got the wagon out again and took it over to Queen Elizabeth's grave.
In a very business-like,
Yet loving manner,
They dug her up,
Brushed her off,
And put her carefully back in the red wagon.
Then they recreated the whole funeral procession,
Parading a second time through the whole school,
Then brought her back to the grave under the tree,
Cleaned out the hole,
And buried her all over again.
When the community of little kids realized that one of their members had missed an important ritual,
They cared enough about their classmate and Queen Elizabeth to include him the next day.
Both funeral processions,
Especially the second one,
Really impressed the teenagers.
The image of Queen Elizabeth lingers with me too,
The small brown furry body so loved by the little kids,
And such a teacher of reverence and gratitude and community.
CREEKMAN'S COMMUNITY We are part of an infinite,
Ever-expanding community,
The cosmos,
Which is all the time growing into more and more complexity.
Each community,
A circle of members,
Is a creation,
And its cells continue to grow and seek out other circles with which to connect and relate.
Creation itself can be seen as a web of circles of circles,
Networks of networks,
A vast organic evolution.
The more communities we discover in which to participate or create ourselves,
The more boundaries melt away.
We are one because we are all part of creation,
The ultimate beloved community.
Let's close with a spiritual practice.
This one is called My Tribe.
Find a quiet space and sit in silence.
Relax into this present moment.
Realize that you have access to all the air and energy you need,
That you are held and supported by the earth underneath you.
In your mind's eye,
Call forth individuals that cared for you in the past,
People both in and outside your blood family,
Your beloved community,
Your tribe,
Your family and friends,
Near and far,
Alive and deceased.
If you can't find any,
Imagine who you would like to have in your tribe and invite them forward.
Bring these individuals,
And perhaps animals as well,
Into your heart and allow yourself to feel the deep affections and affirmations they offer you.
Let their love shower over and enter you.
Nourish your being with their love.
Feel the warmth of their support and good wishes.
Let this sink deeply into your core.
Know that their love is with you,
Now and always.
Allow your community to love you.
This brings our course Essence The Emotional Path to Spirit to conclusion.
Thank you.
I am deeply grateful that you joined me.
I appreciate you taking this course and being part of the Insight Timer community.
The combination of inner work and outer action in this course,
Interior essence expressed as exterior essence,
Is desperately needed in this time of transformation.
May your essence flower forth from the limitless creativity of the universe.
May you have the courage to live your essence so that nothing holds you back from a direct path to the divine.
And may you live with the realization that union with the divine is not only possible but also impossible to avoid.
May your essence shine forth.
