Grief is most often associated with the death of a loved one.
And while that is certainly one form of grief.
It is far from the only one.
Grief can arise anytime life changes in a way we didn't choose,
Didn't expect.
Or weren't ready for.
We grieve the loss of people.
We grieve the loss of relationships.
We grieve the end of a marriage.
A child leaving home.
A friendship changing.
A beloved pet?
A job we loved.
A career we spent years building.
A dream we held for our future.
The version of ourselves we used to be.
We grieve our health.
And we grieve unmet expectations.
Even positive life changes can bring grief.
Because something is ending as something new begins.
What I've come to understand is that grief isn't something we get over.
It's something we learn to carry differently.
And when we don't allow ourselves to feel it,
Acknowledge it.
Or process it.
The body often carries it for us.
And sometimes this appears as tension.
Fatigue.
Anxiety sometimes as aches and pains that seem to arrive out of nowhere.
And sometimes it appears on an anniversary date.
A birthday.
A holiday.
A familiar season.
A memory.
A song.
A smell.
A place.
And suddenly the grief is right there and present again.
Not because we failed to heal.
Not because we've moved backwards.
But because grief lives within us.
Grief doesn't always need the story when it arrives.
Sometimes it simply needs our presence.
So when grief arrives on an anniversary,
A birthday,
A holiday.
Or in response to a song or memory.
We don't have to immediately revisit everything that happened.
We can pause and ask.
What is present for me right now?
Because when grief rises to the surface,
It is often asking for our attention.
Not our judgment,
Not our resistance,
Simply our awareness.
Our willingness to acknowledge it.
Asking for our compassion.
Asking for our acceptance.
Asking for our grace.
So rather than pushing it away or becoming lost in the story,
We can pause.
We can notice.
We can place a hand on our heart.
Take a breath.
And simply acknowledge this is grief.
I feel it.
And it belongs here too.
In my experience,
Healing doesn't come from forcing grief away.
Healing comes from allowing ourselves to be with what is here.
To be with what shows up.
Moment by moment,
Breath by breath.
With great compassion for ourselves and the experience we're having.
So whatever grief may present for you today,
May you meet it with awareness,
Acceptance,
And grace.
