And Aum Shanti,
Aum Shanti means we're peaceful,
Being of peace.
So a big welcome to all of you.
And let's enjoy ourselves having a look at tonight's talk.
To be your own success coach.
Have you ever wondered why your plans don't always work out?
And why is it that some people appear to lead charmed lives?
So let's have a look at what is real success in life and how to achieve it.
Here's a quote by Albert Einstein.
Try not to become a man of success,
But rather try to become a man of value.
You've maybe heard lots of coaching language,
Such as mission,
Improvements,
Effectiveness,
Inflow,
Catalyst,
Optimize,
Momentum,
Strategies,
Specific goals,
Etc.
,
Etc.
,
Etc.
,
That whole list.
But if you really look at these words,
How meaningful are these words?
They're just words.
They can sound new and quite exciting,
But if you actually try to figure out and put it into your mind and be it,
What's behind the word?
So we're saying the reality is that you really have to understand yourself.
And by understanding yourself,
You will understand everything.
And behind that is the power to have some stillness,
Steadiness and concentration,
Which we call meditation.
And then you can perhaps be your own success coach.
It's a nice image.
What we all want,
Everybody here,
Including we want to feel valuable.
But apart from feeling valuable,
We want to feel safe.
We want to feel that there's some purpose also to ourselves.
And then we want to feel belonging.
We want to feel love.
These are words,
But they're pretty big asks in today's world.
So how can I make this actually happen?
How can I experience happiness and well-being?
We might say that we have good things in our lives.
That's good.
That's good karma.
But how much can I depend on the good things in my life to go on and on and on and on?
Nothing goes on and on and on.
Everything changes.
And we don't know when the big picture will actually also change.
And so somehow we do know that and there's a fear factor inside because we feel we want something to totally depend on.
When I can feel I can totally depend on something,
Such a relief.
Am I even able to become peaceful and calm and reassured?
So how can I make it possible?
Where is something that I can totally depend on?
There's a space inside of each of us.
It's a point of living life,
Which is ourselves.
And inside this point of energy are all our values.
It's just we forget to replenish this and we forget to tick the boxes of how valuable we actually are.
We are so valuable,
Each individual personality,
Each one of us.
The world couldn't go on without even one of us.
And we are forever.
This energy of the self is eternal and it's full of all the qualities that we're looking for.
If I want to feel loved,
I have love inside me.
If I want to feel safe and reassured,
I can do that.
I can reassure myself.
If I want to feel calm,
I can practice that.
I want to have courage.
I can find that also.
If I want to be lighthearted,
I can also tick that box by looking at the wonder of myself.
So when I start to explore my life in this way,
I begin to understand myself.
When I understand myself,
I can then coach myself.
I can talk to myself.
I can organize myself.
I can reassure myself.
I can put myself forward.
I can be optimistic about myself,
About my progress.
I can train myself to stop worrying.
I used to say a lot when I was younger.
People would say to you,
Stop worrying.
You die if you worry.
You die if you don't.
So why worry?
And we just had a smile at that and it's true.
What good did worrying ever do any of us?
What good?
It just traumatizes you for that time and makes your energy all upset,
Unable to do anything,
Fearful of what's going to happen.
So what's the point?
Before you know it,
Whatever it was is overdone with and it's like,
Gosh,
I gave myself such a hard time.
For what?
So every time I give myself a hard time,
I'm really not understanding who I am.
I give myself respect because I'm worthy of respect.
Respect myself.
Don't hurt myself the same as you wouldn't hurt something fragile and lovely.
You're fragile and lovely.
You're also strong and resourceful.
So when I start to look at the qualities I have inside,
I'm able to start flexing with myself and quite enjoying my own company.
When I enjoy my own company,
I find I'm putting myself in a position to enjoy other people's company in the right way and to understand other people.
Because a coach is like a leader.
People go to a coach to learn things.
Well,
Just let's change the word coach to the word leader.
I can never ever be a leader until I can lead myself.
How can I lead anyone else?
How can I coach anyone else?
How can I tell anyone else what to do if I don't know what to do myself?
How can I understand anybody if I don't understand myself?
How can I reassure anybody if I haven't practiced?
I might maybe not be brilliant at it,
But if I haven't practiced reassuring myself over and over again that it's okay.
It's okay.
Whatever happens is okay.
It's just the attitude we have to whatever happens.
And it says here,
Don't try to be successful.
Because to be successful is a tough road.
If I'm going to force myself into success,
I'll be so worried I get it wrong.
I've got people watching me,
They're ready to say,
Oh,
That's not right.
I might even get traumatized by the barriers that are in front of me.
I'd have to use extreme force to push myself forward.
Extreme force is actually violence.
It might only be violence against myself.
But to push myself forward is extreme force.
I don't have to push myself forward.
I just have to be,
Know who I am,
And move myself forward with assurance,
Dignity,
And respect for myself.
Quietly and kindly move my way forward.
That's the way to move forward.
You'll move yourself forward.
You'll be an example to people around you.
And you won't have hurt anyone,
Anyone's feelings,
Anyone's heart.
You'll be an example.
So the method for this is to know yourself.
But it's not just to know yourself,
It's to believe.
And you do believe.
We do know.
We do know.
Because I remember so many years ago when I was about this height,
I used something would come that was a bit difficult,
A bit awkward,
Or some sport,
Or some exam,
Or something,
Or something new.
And I used to say to myself,
Never always used to do it,
But somehow I even knew then.
So I know all of you know.
I used to say,
I could do it if I wanted to,
But maybe I don't want to.
I didn't know how actually.
But you knew that somewhere inside you was a capability,
But you couldn't bring it forward.
You didn't know how to bring it forward.
But you knew that somewhere,
So why,
How did we know that?
Somewhere in our life experience,
We had actually been good at many,
Many,
Many things.
I could if I wanted to,
But I don't know if I've got the time.
And that was it,
Away.
You always had an excuse,
I haven't got the time.
Why?
Because I didn't really know the value of myself.
I didn't really understand how it all fitted together.
I didn't know how it would all pan out.
I just knew that somewhere inside me there was an ability.
And that was all I needed to know at that time.
And I'm sure a lot of you can identify with that.
So all I needed to know was I could if I wanted to.
And then that was it,
Away.
But now we've reached the stage where we could.
We truly could.
Because we begin to know how we function.
And we function on our energy.
And good energy is full of power.
If you want power,
If you want strength,
If you want reality,
If you want truth,
Then look at what's inside you.
We used to,
Well I used to cringe at Voldemort when I look inside.
I might find a whole load of things I don't like.
We all think there's going to be not niceness in there.
That's not really true.
Our original qualities are amazing.
Our original energy is amazing.
And for some reason through our journey of life we stop focusing on what's in here.
Because we're too busy trying to cope with all the things that are happening out there.
And all the things that are happening out there,
The things that make me doubtful,
The things that rob me of my strength,
The things that make me worried,
The things that make me scared.
Because I've got to compete all the time.
I've got to try and be successful all the time.
I've got to try and push myself forward like that all the time.
I don't know if I can do it.
I don't know if I've got the courage.
So that's why we've never been our own success coach.
But to be our own success coach is to look in and see what you have in there.
And you'll be utterly astonished at the wonder that's you.
And the only thing that will truly ever make us happy.
It doesn't matter who you've got around you,
How wonderful everyone is individually.
But each individual needs to know the wonder of themselves.
Once you have the wonder of yourself even a little bit in view,
Then you can begin to share that wonder,
But see the wonder in others.
And appreciate how lucky you are in life.
Because each of us will have quite a lot of good people around us.
But I almost guarantee you,
You're not really noticing their wonder.
Because you're not noticing your own.
And all we see is the fact that,
Oh,
They didn't do this,
They didn't do that.
Oh,
They could have done this and why didn't they do that?
And how could they say that?
Why would they not say this?
And this is how we go on.
You can't notice it until you notice it in yourself.
Once you notice that you're actually peaceful,
You're kindly,
You're considerate,
You're caring,
You're strong.
And there's something special about you also because you're sitting listening to this.
So you're focused,
You want to find truth.
And once you see these things in yourself,
That's what does something wonderful inside.
To see yourself.
Okay?
Seeing yourself is the beginning of you being your own self-coach.
Your own self-leader.
You coach yourself.
You see things.
And wow,
Is that possible?
And encourage yourself to keep that energy going.
Encourage yourself to be more light-hearted,
Encourage yourself to be friendly,
Encourage yourself to be cheerful and hopeful and focused.
Encourage yourself.
Every time the other energy comes along which says,
Oh,
I don't know,
I can't be bothered,
Don't know,
I don't like this.
That's not doing you any good.
That's all the energies of trying to please the things out there and move yourself forward with force.
That brings the negative.
The negative makes you sick,
Makes you ill.
The bright,
Cheerful,
Positive energy moves you forward gracefully and helps you achieve your goal.
Okay?
And quite honestly,
It doesn't matter how many clever words you hear,
There is no other way.
Than seeing the strength,
The safe place inside you.
You have a safe place.
Go to it.
Sit in your own safe,
Warm space where you're loved.
Turn our thoughts to benefit for the self.
And use our thoughts to construct something new and fresh and unique for the self.
And visualize that I have a point of energy that's a safe place for me to go.
To feel safe,
To feel secure and to feel cherished and valuable.
I'm a beautiful being of energy.
And I live in this body and I live my life.
It's good to take time over and over again.
It's good to take time over and over to reflect on who I really am.
What are my qualities?
What is the energy that I use to live this life?
Do I use complicated,
Difficult energies?
Do I use energies that make me feel unhappy and insecure?
Or do I use my original energies that make me feel warm and loved and very,
Very valuable?
I'm a being of thought.
My thoughts are my treasures.
Anything I think,
I can become.
I simply have to practice thinking in a very powerful,
Pure and beautiful way.
Practice giving myself that regard and respect for who I am.
I am a peaceful soul.
Practice feeling my peace,
Calmness and stillness.
A being of light.
Safe and comfortable within my own self.
I'm Shanti.
