My name is Sengit and today I am sharing with you something about helping.
This is something that can happen in many forms,
And in all of them there is some sort and some amount of giving.
This will differ according to different situations and contexts.
On the other hand,
There is also receiving,
Which is something that inevitably comes along with helping and is,
Of course,
An essential part of the whole process of help.
Let's start with the helping.
What is helping,
Truly,
At the core?
It is the act of matching and fulfilling someone's needs,
Right?
Someone needs something and we help by facilitating or by giving it to them.
So,
When we really help,
We match someone's needs.
And this,
On its own,
Sounds easy and flowing.
Why?
Because there is no resistance or opposite forces involved,
There is only allowance.
Now,
In what comes to receiving,
This is something necessary to happen so the act of help really and fully occurs.
And for this,
Again,
There has to be a match between someone's exact needs and someone's exact help,
And the result can be felt as a blessing for both sides because it feels good to help when the other is happy to be helped,
And it feels good to be helped when the other is happy to help.
But what happens if we try to help someone who doesn't reciprocate or who doesn't receive our action?
It results in some sort of awkwardness,
Right?
Helping is never forcing and forcing is never helping,
Even if the full process occurs.
If it comes from forcing,
Whether forcing ourselves to give or forcing ourselves to receive,
It can never be called helping simply because helping requires a blissful energy dynamic that has the purpose to do exactly that,
To help.
So,
How we use the term helping can be tricky because it can go both ways and it can come from a lower or from a higher frequency.
We may want to help or to be helpful and,
For example,
Place ourselves in some charity context that attracts people who want to be helped,
Or we may,
For example,
Force our helping to someone without making sure that they want to be helped.
One of the aspects that contribute to this ambiguity is the collective social mindset that pushes us to believe that if we help,
We will be good and kind and right.
Plus,
There is also an overall tendency to classify some of us as weak or in need,
Such as when we are homeless or sick or in any other temporary or permanent condition that strongly contrasts the ideal idea that we have of the perfect human being and of the perfect life.
And in addition to this,
There is also a tendency to believe that if we are in this kind of conditions,
We then have to accept the help that is being given,
Whatever it is,
Otherwise we will be rude or ungrateful.
A good example of this would be when someone gives food to another person who is in a homeless condition,
Assuming that they are hungry and desperate for any kind of food,
And then they reject it.
This can make the helper to go on a mental rollercoast of assumptions,
Some of them quite negative.
And this is when we totally forget that we are all human beings with unique traits and preferences,
And that we always have the right to say yes or no,
And that that should always be respected,
Despite any condition or drastic change that we could be facing in our lives.
Maybe the person wasn't that hungry,
Or not hungry at all.
Maybe they wanted or needed something else,
Or maybe they didn't even want or need anything.
We don't know unless we ask,
Right?
Helping only happens if it is genuine,
Either by someone asking for the exact help that they want and need,
Or by someone understanding the exact help that another person wants and needs.
If we force it,
If we don't listen,
If we are mainly focused on our own need and willingness to help,
Instead of focusing on the other person's real need and willingness to be helped,
Then the concept of helping can't be applied,
Because all we are doing is projecting ourselves instead of being opened to all possibilities.
So,
Today,
Let's be truly helpful and let's truly help,
And let's do it from our hearts.
We all know that helping can add great energies into our lives,
And this on its own can indeed make us want to help,
But above all,
Helping should be as simple as just that,
Helping with all the respect that it implies and wishing nothing in return.
