Healthy Boundaries: Reclaim Your Energy & Heal Relationships

So welcome everyone,

Thank you for joining.

So today we'll explore one of the most transformative tools or skills for well-being and that's creating healthy boundaries.

Now have you ever found yourself drained after certain interactions or maybe sometimes you say yes to people,

To things,

To projects when you really just want to say no or perhaps you've noticed that despite trying to connect with others something prevents truly authentic relationships from forming.

Now in my own journey and also in people that I've worked with what often comes to mind is boundaries will push others away but I believe clear boundaries actually create the conditions and space for deeper connection.

Without having clear healthy boundaries we often end up exhausted disconnected or even resentful.

So what can having boundaries do for me?

Now first they protect your energy.

When I'm very clear about what depletes me versus what nourishes me,

I find myself with significantly more energy for people and activities that I truly value.

Boundaries can also help you transform your relationships.

Now I've worked with a number of people who discovered that once they began setting clear compassionate boundaries,

Their relationships deepened,

The connection became more authentic because it was based on truth rather than an obligation.

Now having boundaries can also help you recognize your own needs and values.

So this very act of determining where your boundary lies can bring clarity about what matters to you and this self-knowledge is invaluable for making aligned life choices.

Very simple example,

I once worked with someone who never said no to extra projects at work.

Now even though she was respected at work and even liked for being helpful but she was also burning out quickly.

Now as we worked and helped establish healthy work boundaries which would translate into learning to say things like I can take that on next week or I'd need to deprioritize project X as an example to do this work now.

Now as she gradually slowly first realized that potentially there was something deeper going on that need to say yes to everything and as she brought in healthy boundaries,

Verbalized them,

Stated them,

Her colleagues actually started to respect and honor her more.

So just as the case is in this example,

There may be people,

Places,

Things,

Situations in our lives where we struggle to say no.

We feel obliged,

Overwhelmed and the pull is so strong that we find ourselves doing things,

Activities,

Saying yes to things which we don't really want to do at the cost of our own well-being.

That's physically,

Mentally,

Emotionally,

Energetically draining.

Now we'll create a space today where I can guide you to a place where we can first sense where our boundaries are.

Then we can work on balancing them.

Now this is not just a visualization exercise but a practice that has the potential to create tangible shifts in how you engage with yourself first and then others.

Now you may feel heat,

Cold,

Tingling,

Sensations,

Emotions during this journey.

All that is perfectly normal.

So let's begin.

So let's begin first just by finding a comfortable position,

Sitting up,

Lying down and just allowing your body now to be supported.

Do I need to make any adjustments to feel at ease?

Do I need to move my hands?

Do I need to lie down?

Do I need to change the position of my body in any way?

Just make that change now.

This is my time for myself and I'm gonna find the most comfortable position for me,

Whatever that looks like for you.

And as you take a few moments to do that,

Very very gently now you can soften your gaze and if your body allows you can close your eyes.

Now bring your awareness to your breath.

Bring your awareness to your breath and as you do that simply observe the natural rhythm of your inhale and exhale.

Breath moving in and breath moving out.

There's no need to change anything.

If you haven't done so already at this stage you can fully close your eyes.

As you continue breathing naturally now you may begin to notice some sensations in your body.

Now feel the air on your skin.

Notice where your clothes touch your body and feel maybe your hands,

Your fingers.

Now as you've relaxed and gone deeper into your body,

I'm gonna now say these words and just let my words guide you.

Just feel the boundary of your skin.

The physical edge where you meet the world.

Now the skin is your first physical boundary.

It keeps you intact,

Allowing for exchange,

Allowing for sensations.

Just feel that now.

I'm feeling my physical boundary now which is neither rigid nor weak and I'm aware of it now.

I'm in this vessel,

I'm in this body and around my body there is the skin boundary,

There is the physical boundary which keeps me intact.

Now the same way we have a physical body,

You have a physical boundary,

We believe there is also an energy body that we have.

So a few inches outward from my physical layer is my energetic boundary.

Now some would call this your aura or the light around your body or the feel that surrounds your physical body.

So all we have to do now is just bring this to our awareness.

So I invite you to bring your awareness now to your energetic boundary which is the feel that surrounds your physical body.

Now some people sense this as a bubble of light around them,

Others as a space or a presence.

Now whichever way you perceive this is perfect,

You cannot get this process wrong.

Let's take a few more breaths here and as we breathe quietly you may be more aware now of your energetic boundary.

You may feel it as a tingling,

You may feel it as a sensation.

If you're a visual person you may actually see in your mind's eye a light or a color around you.

Now I want you to notice how your energetic boundary feels like today.

Is it close to your body or does it extend far outwards?

Does it feel the same all around you or is it different in various directions?

There is no right or wrong and what your awareness is showing you now is where you are.

So just notice what's true in this moment.

If it feels helpful you might use your hands actually to sense this boundary.

So you can lift your hands up and you can very very slowly move your hands away from your body until you feel a shift or a change.

Now for most people as they move their hands there is a point where I would feel either a tingling or a temperature change or I'll just get a sense it's there,

It's there,

It's there.

Now once you have that this might be where your energetic field currently extends.

This might be where your boundary is.

I'm just going to pause there for a second and acknowledge as you've located your energetic boundary.

Now at this stage you're very welcome to relax your hands down if you had them up.

Now let's explore how this boundary feels in different situations.

For the next few seconds bring to mind someone you feel completely safe with and someone whose presence feels nourishing.

And as you picture this person notice what happens to your energetic boundary.

It may become more open while still maintaining its integrity.

Just feel that Now just to show you how this process works,

Just for a second imagine being in a crowded place now with many strangers.

You're in a very crowded place,

There's a lot of strangers there,

Maybe you're in a shopping mall in a busy market,

A lot of people,

A lot of energies all around.

And just imagine that you're in a very crowded place,

There's a lot of strangers,

There's a lot Just notice now the change that you feel in your body.

Notice how your boundary might naturally become more defined,

A bit stronger maybe.

And this is happening to maintain your sense of self amid the many energies.

And this natural adjustment is your system's own wisdom.

Now that I have a sense of where my physical boundary is,

I also have a sense of where my energetic boundary is today.

I have a sense of what it feels being in the presence of someone where I feel safe.

Then I also did a visualization to see how my boundary becomes more rigid and strong as I'm in the presence of other energies.

Now that I have this awareness,

And again it doesn't have to be perfect.

Now we'll practice setting clear boundaries with intention.

Now bring to mind something in your life that feels depleting or overwhelming to you.

A person,

A job situation,

A family member,

A relationship,

Or anything else.

Just picture this person,

Situation,

Or interaction.

This could be something in the territory of where you feel depleted,

Where you can't say no,

Where you take action which is not in alignment with your well-being,

With what your conscious mind knows.

Or an area where I can practice having healthier boundaries.

I am just giving you keywords and whatever you need to see will show up for you exactly as it should.

Now as you have this person,

Situation,

Or interaction,

I want you to gently say this to yourself.

No,

This doesn't serve me right now.

And we'll say this again.

No,

This doesn't serve me right now.

And we'll say this one more time.

No,

This doesn't serve me right now.

Now just notice how it feels in your body to set this boundary.

Maybe I took a breath.

Maybe I feel a bit calm.

Maybe I feel a bit strong.

Maybe there is energy still moving in my body.

Just wait and observe.

Wait and observe.

Wait and observe.

Wait and observe.

Wait and observe.

Now you decide the way you want your boundary to be with this person,

With this thing,

With this situation.

Now that you've told the field that it doesn't serve you,

Now this is your opportunity to establish that healthy boundary.

So you can picture yourself,

You can picture them,

That situation,

That interaction,

That thing,

Anything that represents it.

You'll use your hands once again.

If you want to lift your hands up and find that place.

Start moving your hands outwards.

And you know intuitively what the right distance is for them.

And now once you've found that place,

Once you've found that healthy clear boundary with this person,

Place or situation,

Hold that.

And now take a moment to imagine how this situation will change now.

Maybe I now have the freedom to say no.

Maybe I can now prioritize my well-being when I need to.

Maybe I'll be very comfortable now saying no,

This doesn't serve me right now.

So as you have set this healthy space and boundary for your own self,

As you're prioritizing your own well-being,

Anything that doesn't serve this is now going to stay out.

Notice any sensations in your body as you're making this adjustment.

Now we're also calling in for the next few breaths,

The clarity and the wisdom to know what serves you and what doesn't.

And the courage to honor that knowing.

For the next few breaths,

We are calling in the clarity to know what serves your well-being and what doesn't and the courage to honor that knowing.

And you can relax your hands down.

Now you can visualize your boundary which you've just established as a luminous field around you.

Starting today,

Starting now,

This is clear,

Strong and flexible.

You can now also discern what to allow and what to keep at a distance.

And if it helps you,

You can also see perhaps a light or maybe this luminous field is glowing with a color which feels protective and nurturing to you.

So just let that naturally happen now.

Now if you wish to stay here longer and spend time establishing your boundaries,

Or maybe there is another situation or a person you want to bring in,

You're very welcome to do that.

We'll now affirm to ourselves,

I honor my boundaries as an act of self-respect.

Clear boundaries allow me to connect more authentically with others.

I now choose to prioritize myself and my own well-being.

Now slowly,

Gently,

We'll start to bring our awareness back to the physical body.

And we trust now and we know that this boundary,

Energetic boundary that I tapped into,

That I established,

That will stay with me now going forward.

Start by feeling the floor underneath you.

Now perhaps wiggle your fingers,

Wiggle your toes,

Moving your neck side to side.

And when you're ready,

Gently open your eyes,

Carrying this sense of clear,

Strong,

Healthy boundaries with you as you return to your day or your night.

Now as you build upon and carry this practice into your daily life,

You may start to notice subtle but positive changes,

Powerful changes.

Now conversations that once left you depleted may feel more balanced.

Decisions may become clearer as you honor your own needs.

And you may start to live with more energy available to you and your own well-being.

Once again,

We remember that setting boundaries and saying no is sometimes an essential act of self-care that allows us to be more present and authentic with others.

And I can only offer anything to the world when my own cup is full.

I invite you to return to this practice whenever you feel your energy is becoming scattered or drained with each practice.

Your boundary awareness will strengthen,

Creating more space for authenticity,

Joy and self-care.

So thank you again for joining me for this practice and Namaste.