Discerning The Dark Night Of The Soul

So I wanted to start with the poem that St.

John of the Cross wrote,

And the poem is called The Dark Night.

So I'll read this to you,

And so you can let it kind of sink in and you can see how the text,

Because he eventually wrote a text based on this poem,

That kind of elaborates what he was thinking when he wrote this.

Yeah,

Good,

Okay.

So the poem,

You'll see,

It reads,

On a dark night,

Kindled in love with yearnings,

Oh happy chance,

I went forth without being observed,

My house being now at rest,

In darkness and secure by the secret ladder,

Disguised,

Oh happy chance,

In darkness and concealment,

My house being now at rest,

In the happy night in secret,

When none saw me,

Nor I beheld aught without light or guide,

Save that which burns in my heart,

The light guided me more surely than the light of noonday,

To the place where he,

Well I know who,

Was awaiting me,

A place where none appeared,

O night that guided me,

O night more lovely than the dawn,

O night that joined Beloved with Lover,

Lover transformed in the Beloved,

Upon my flowery breast kept holy for himself alone,

There he stayed sleeping and I caressed him,

And the fanning and the cedars made a breeze,

The breeze flew from the turret as I parted his locks,

With his gentle hand he wounded my neck and caused all my senses to be suspended,

I remained lost in oblivion,

My face I reclined on the Beloved,

All ceased and I abandoned myself,

Leaving my cares forgotten among the lilies.

So there's just a huge mouthful there.

And so we'll kind of,

We won't dissect the text but you can certainly google it.

And see if you can meditate on that at a different time.

So Saint John of the Cross is a 16th century Spanish mystic and he was an intellectual.

So he was educated and he worked very very closely with Saint Teresa of Avila who was also another Spanish mystic.

And they were part of the counter-reformation of the Catholic Church.

So obviously the reformation of the Catholic Church saw the advent of Protestantism and the counter-reformation recognized that there were faults in the church and sought to bring about some renewal.

And because of this he was imprisoned.

And during those many times where he was imprisoned he while alone would compose this very very deep spiritual poetry.

And it's interesting because he never used the term dark night of the soul.

He just called it noche escora which is dark night.

And so the book itself is a lot of words.

And then the subsequent book is called a scent of Mount Carmel and this is actually much more readable.

This is a little bit more like a teaching tool if you would.

And so that works kind of like a road map more than just the very heady text of dark night of the soul.

And so the premise of the dark night as we've said earlier is the explanation of it's a spiritual transformation.

It is looking deeply at how we've deluded ourselves into believing that these illusions are who God is.

And it's described as this means of sort of purging our worldly desires and attachments to the worldly self.

And when you think about there's a lot of talks these days talking about the authentic self and the false self and the true self and your magnificent self.

And sovereign self.

It's all talking about this idea that there's this internal being that exists inside of you.

And then we just kind of take on all these worldly identities and kind of stick them all over ourselves.

And it hampers our ability to see not only the world a little bit more clearly but see ourselves a little bit more clearly.

So the premise of the dark night is this idea that is this goal of perfect union with God.

And you see a lot of very similar ideas in different traditions.

So if you study Buddhism you know that they are always looking at Maya the illusions and how that obscures how we view reality.

And the Buddha sat there and he was looking for that pure consciousness.

And I know as a yoga instructor myself we seek samadhi and there's different things.

There's different things that we have to walk through.

We can't just spiritual bypass.

We have to practice the certain observances and the certain restraints.

And we have to move through those stages so we can get rid of the ignorance,

The illusions that impede our abilities.

So a lot of different spiritual traditions will talk about this unity,

This idea that we're all connected.

So this is the Christian interpretation.

And so that's really what forms the contemplative and the mystical traditions of Christianity.

That's often kind of like the red-headed stepchild although it is making resurgence in some Christian circles.

And so Saint John of the Cross he reviews what interferes and we mentioned this before.

He describes it and this was the medieval time and so we have this idea of sin.

And we could also consider how our own attachments these days,

Our own desires,

Interfere with our ability to find happiness and find joy.

And it's interesting he really elaborates.

Yeah so he elaborates on how pride can often get into the way of our spiritual life.

And you know we sometimes engage in virtue signaling and we sometimes kind of puff ourselves up thinking that we are so much more holier and so much more spiritual than everyone else.

But that's just pride.

If you really study some of these great spiritual teachings from all traditions you know that humility is at their foundation.

It's not about them.

It's pointing to something that's deeper than themselves.

So again he reviews all the seven deadly sins.

Pride,

Greed,

Gluttony,

Luxury,

Anger,

Envy,

And sloth.

So his particular idea is this noting of the sensory pleasure and we become addicted to feeling good in our spiritual life.

So we want to feel good right and I mean who doesn't?

So we believe that these these these highs that we get are God.

And we believe that you know let's wow ourselves into this this ecstatic state.

And that is wonderful for someone who is just entering into a spiritual life.

But eventually the honeymoon is over right?

Eventually in developing a relationship there has to be some sort of maturity.

And sometimes when we miss that that high that beautiful wow we believe that God is not dead.

We believe that God is not there.

And so he explains that we get addicted to these sensory pleasures.

And we have to kind of remember that the relationship is much more important than the senses.

And so yeah I you know even though I'm a Catholic now.

I mean I was always Catholic but even when I was in an evangelical community I used to get just this fabulous rush.

And for a while I wasn't getting it and I was actually envious for people in my Bible studies who were getting these these ecstatic feelings.

And they would just have these wonderful rushes and I was like well clearly my faith isn't good enough because I'm not feeling this way.

So Saint John says no that's not what it's about.

So the dark night of the soul again we've established that he didn't call it the dark night of the soul he called it the dark night.

And the dark night is actually two nights and they're actually not even nights.

It's actually kind of signifies kind of a period of your life.

And so the first night deals with the sensual and the second deals with the spiritual.

And so the sensual comes first and we can think about the the night of the senses as kind of like the like a detox or a diet.

When you know that something isn't working in your life and so you say okay I've got to get rid of this detox that limit my relationship with it so I'm not so attached.

Okay so you know you consider some of your sensory gratifications what is what is it that really kind of heightens your senses.

And sometimes you might that might interfere with with your relationship.

With your relationships with yourself your relationship with others and your relationship with God.

And so I kind of adopt there's a neuroscientist here in Philadelphia who kind of calls enlightenment there's like the little e and the big e.

So the little e are those little periods of enlightenment that you might feel that might have a temporary transformation in your life.

And so this dark night of the sense kind of gives you that ultimately the on the other side of that gives you that little e that little burst of enlightenment that might last for several months or maybe several days I don't know.

Ultimately you don't go back to that this is once you experience this true night of the sense and it picks apart a particular gratification you don't want to return because you recognize the liberation that's felt.

Okay so he elaborates the most in this text on the night of the sense because he recognizes that most people on this path will experience this night of the sense at one point in their life some people never even experience it at all.

And so he spends a lot of time on this night and so again it's not just one night and sometimes it might be just particularly troublesome.

And so when we begin to lose our faith and begin to lose hope that's when we get a little bit of consolation so we feel a little pulling back from that obscurity.

So we experience this moments of consolation but then when we're ready we go back into that idea of obscurity.

And St.

John also talks about how we just don't seem to have the same feelings about things our emotions are kind of pulled back.

And good okay so basically it pulls away our senses and it pulls away some of our emotional attachments to certain pleasures.

So we can actually see things a little bit more clearly.

So St.

John talks about the three signs so this is how you can decide if maybe you're experiencing this.

Okay and the first sign is this idea of aridity and I think that's the best way of describing it this arid sense like you're in this desert.

And this is where it very closely resembles depression and psychiatrist and theologian Gerald May actually wrote a whole book on the closeness between the dark night of the senses or the dark night period and depression.

And he actually says that in his clinical experience that he says people who are experiencing the dark night I mean sorry depression really have a negative view of life.

Whereas people who are experiencing the dark night still have that that slight degree of hope.

This idea of hope serves as like this white noise there's no pleasure in it but it's this sense of groundedness.

This idea that okay you just feel this sense of groundedness like you really feel like okay I'm not sad but I'm not happy I'm just very okay.

And so you still have this not hope in something but you just kind of rest you kind of rest in that that idea that okay there's no pleasure but there's also no sadness.

Okay and I've also heard that depression you don't feel like yourself then in the dark night you actually you still feel like you're yourself you actually feel a little bit more yourself because you feel like you're no longer lying to yourself.

Okay so you know for me in my experience I notice I'm like I don't feel depressed but I don't like I still feel like I'm very much myself but I'm just no longer attracted to the things that used to find pleasure in my life.

Okay so yeah it is like a desert but it's like this it's more like a feeling of detox than depression if that's a little bit more clear Sarah.

It's just that aridity that I think is very typical of the dark night versus depression.

And so the second sign is frustration.

So as you know frustration is somewhat negative but it's just like this why am I doing this like why am I feeling this way?

Because you still are engaging in your spiritual practices so you might be volunteering at the shelter you might be going to your spiritual communities you might be praying on a regular basis and you feel like you're just not serving but you're not serving God even though you are serving God.

It's very very different from an unanswered prayer so just to be clear a lot of people are very frustrated because they believe that God is like a Santa Claus and so why isn't God answering my prayer versus the idea that I recognize that this is a relationship that's deepening and I'm still in service.

So you're working on the relationship you're not just saying okay dad can I please have a new bike.

It's a relationship where you're that you're giving that you're putting in the time the effort the energy but you feel like you're like getting the sensory gratification that you might used to.

So it's getting you to get away from the attachment to the old ways of being.

So the second point is so the second sign is this idea of frustration.

And so we come from a world that's obsessed with doing things constantly.

And the irony is that the dark night really isn't about doing it's more about being and allowing yourself to be.

And so therefore in the dark night this second sign of frustration.

We don't make any drastic changes in our lives.

We were called to remain still and faithful.

And St.

John compares it to you know we're moving about all the time.

Exactly Sarah.

Self-reflection time.

So we're moving about if we're moving around so much trying to change our practices trying to do all these different things.

He compares it to like you know how can a painter paint his masterpiece if the subject is always moving.

So instead we remain still and so this is where the contemplative practices come in.

And so we remain still and know and trust and still have faith.

And St.

John writes if those souls who come if those souls to whom this comes to pass knew how to be quiet at this time.

And troubled not about performing any kind of action whether inward or outward.

Neither had had any anxiety about doing anything.

Then they would delicately experience this inward refreshment in that ease and freedom from care.

And he continues in this peace being spiritual and delicate performs a work which is quiet and delicate solitary productive of peace and satisfaction.

And far removed from all those earlier pleasures which were very palpable and sensual.

So again it's something much more deep-seated than the sensory pleasures.

So the third night is this you feel a lack of sensory imagination.

And so what is that?

And so this is where I knew that I was in the dark night because I was actually in an Ignatian retreat.

And it calls for you to have a very imaginative experience in the prayer practice.

And I would sit there and just not imagine anything.

It was like I'd sit there and okay I'm waiting to imagine.

I just had no imagination.

But that's one way.

But also we have these images of God.

And maybe the development of our spiritual life.

I used to envision God when I was a child to look like the Abraham Lincoln statue at the Lincoln Memorial in Washington.

I just would see him on this big huge chair with this beard.

And so you begin to abandon those images.

But you can't imagine what God is like.

So you let go of those.

So there's images of who you envision God to be kind of fall away.

And because you're not using these wild imaginations,

You actually can rest in the unknowing as they call it.

You kind of rest in that idea that okay maybe God isn't Abraham Lincoln at the memorial.

Maybe God isn't Santa Claus.

You begin to deepen a relationship that's much more profound.

And it's possibly unknowable until you experience that full enlightenment.

So these three signs kind of point this idea that when your senses are withdrawn,

You're not running after these material gratifications.

Your senses actually become sharpened.

And we see these similarities with the yoga sutras in the Bhagavad Gita where they recognize that when you're always looking for sensory pleasures,

Your senses actually become dull.

And by withdrawing the senses,

We call it pratyahara,

You're actually becoming much more in tuned to the subtleties of things.

So in this time during the night of the sense is God is using that energy that you would use in engaging the senses,

He's using that to infuse into the spirit.

And so what are some of the benefits of this dark night of the senses?

Because it's like okay well this sounds like it sucks.

But as we said before,

We do have that benefit of self-reflection,

This self-awareness.

You recognize wow,

I really was chasing after something.

I became overly attached to this.

And so you develop a healthier relationship with things because you really look at things with a new light.

You also experience a new sense of reverence towards the divine because it's more of an experiential relationship with God.

You feel more compelled to stay on that spiritual path.

Yes,

And you actually feel that veil lifting,

You open that veil,

You get a little peek into that and you think wow,

I can't go back now.

Because you experience that little brief moment of little e,

Enlightenment.

And you also have this understanding,

As Sarah says,

This understanding that God is no longer up there,

But God is in here and around us.

And God is what connects us.

And also we develop a sense of patience.

So when we withdraw from the senses,

When we sharpen the senses,

When we're not looking for those sensory gratifications,

Then we are much more able to wait for the right moment for anything in our lives.

So the second night,

Called the night of the spirit,

So the first night is called the night of the senses.

The second night is the night of the spirit.

And few have achieved this big e,

Enlightenment.

And this is this,

So,

And it's not even,

Doesn't have to be a Christian,

Teachers,

But this is this idea that you are completely new as a result of the night of the spirit.

So I'm not going to talk about this one as much.

But it also not,

It's not like once you waken from the dark night of the senses,

Then you automatically go right into the night of the spirit.

You might have several nights of the sense and then have experienced some weeks,

Months,

Years of consolation in that remembered samadhi,

That remembered union.

And then eventually you might be drawn into the night of the spirit.

And so this really gets into the deepest seated habits and affections that the night of the senses couldn't dislodge.

So this is,

So when the night of the senses deals with kind of that sensory pleasures,

This really gets to those deep seated needs.

Those need to belong,

Those need to feel intimate.

We,

Yeah,

We definitely become,

We are definitely transformed and it is definitely a transformation.

You look different,

You walk different because your life has completely turned around.

And then sometimes when we have some spiritual bypassing going on,

We might say,

Oh well,

Oh yeah,

I skipped through the night of the senses right through the spirit.

No,

I'm so new and everything.

Well,

Okay,

I'm not going to say that that didn't happen.

But sometimes people might be listening to their ego and believe that they think that they're in this night.

So it doesn't come as these vain visions and false prophecies.

And he talks about some of these different visions and Saint Teresa of Avila did experience them and so did a lot of the mystics.

So Saint John addresses this and he says,

In some of these souls,

These are the ones who are experiencing these false prophecies and vain visions.

He says,

In some of these souls,

So many are the falsehoods and deceits which lend to multiply and so inveterate do they grow.

As very doubtful that such souls will return to the pure road of virtue and true spirituality.

So in other words,

They're lying to themselves and how can you establish a deeper relationship with God when you can't even be honest with yourself.

So again,

This night of the spirit,

We're perched on all of our worldly identities.

So we're just consumed,

We're not consumed,

We're just completely renewed.

And we only really have one identity and that identity is the union with God.

That's samadhi.

And often we call that the authentic self or the I,

The true self.

And we set aside these worldly experiences and allow the soul to experience God in a different way and it might seem very very unfamiliar to you.

And he calls it,

We allow the soul to experience the peace that surpasses all understanding.

So there is this peace that can be had that really is that it can't be described.

It's just only something that can be felt.

It can't be articulated.

So a lot of people think that St.

John of the Cross is all about the dark night,

But he actually has some really beautiful poems.

And so once we ascend the mountain and achieve union,

He writes this,

He writes,

This is the living flame of love,

Which is another,

He writes,

A living flame of love that tenderly wounded my soul in its deepest center.

Since thou art no longer oppressive,

Perfect me now if it be thy will.

Break the web of this sweet encounter.

Oh,

Sweet burn.

Oh,

Delectable wound.

Oh,

Soft hand.

Oh,

Delicate touch that savors of eternal life and pays every debt in slaying.

Thou'st has changed death into life.

Oh,

Lamps of fire and whose splendors the deep caverns of feeling once obscure and blind now give forth so rarely so exquisitely both warmth and light to their beloved.

How gently and lovingly you awake my heart,

Where in secret you dwell alone and in your sweet breathing filled with good and glory.

How tenderly you swell my heart with love.

But thank you all for joining me.

I hope that this is given a little bit of clarity and so next time you see someone saying,

Oh,

I'm going through the dark night,

Like,

Say,

Well,

Ask yourself,

Are you really?

Have you heard about St.

John of the Cross?

And maybe you can give them a little bit more of this a little bit of information to help guide them on their path,

Because that's really what we're all about is helping others.

So the name of the circle is called spiritual fitness.

Next time sit in the back of the class.

No,

That's fine.

I was glad you joined me.

So yeah,

I am like I said,

I want you to understand that it's not it's not this horrible,

Horrible experience.

It's not depression.

But it is something that that perhaps maybe you might be experiencing and might and might get a little bit of warmth from some Thomas Merton,

Some Mirabai star,

Some Gerald May or from St.

John.

Yes,

You can.

Laura,

You can experience it many times you can experience more than once.

In fact,

I have.

It's,

You know,

Sometimes like I said,

Sometimes I might be all at once for one person for me,

God knows that I've,

You know,

He knows how strong you are.

And so,

For me,

It's taken me a lot of so he he pulls something away has you detox that out of your life.

And then when you feel strong again,

Pull something else your life until you've maintained your strength.

So the circle is called spiritual fitness,

Spiritual fitness circle.