Drinking Our Own Poison & Being Our Own Cure - Weekly Energy

Good morning,

Everyone.

Good evening,

Good afternoon,

Wherever you are,

And welcome to this week's Weekly Energy Boost.

My name is Ellie Sheva,

And I am here this lovely Sunday morning with David as we launch into a very special week and therefore giving you a day earlier to do this work.

Today we're talking about the title of the episode is a little bit complicated.

What we're really talking about today is letting go of grudges,

Drinking our own poison and being our own cure.

And if you've gone if you've gone through the course of the year with us on Weekly Energy Boost,

You know that in this period,

We normally talk about forgiving,

Forgiveness,

Letting go of the past,

Not beating ourselves up.

And I don't think we've ever dedicated a whole episode to releasing grudges,

Which it's pretty refreshing for me because I don't think there's a single person walking on planet Earth right now that isn't holding a grudge to someone or something,

Including the creator or the universe.

So every week on the Weekly Energy Boost,

David and I and sometimes our guests,

We provide our listeners with the most powerful and practical tools to help us navigate the coming seven days.

We do that through looking through the wisdom of Kabbalah.

And this week,

According to Kabbalah,

Is one of the most powerful weeks of the year.

It is one of the most serious weeks of the year.

If that's scary to you,

Go back to last week's episode and learn how to handle it with a bit of lightness.

But in truth,

There is so much amazing opportunity this week,

You don't want to miss a moment of it.

Oh,

I love that.

Well,

This is a really important week and it's actually 10 days.

I know a lot of people get excited about the first two days,

Which is called Rosh Hashanah,

Which is not a religious holiday.

It is a spiritual opening in the universe for all of mankind.

Every soul in this world.

Sorry,

It's that almond milk latte.

So each soul in this world goes through a process in these next 10 days.

And just to overly simplify it for all of us,

The way we show up and the way we did show up in the last year has an accounting and an audit that determines the baseline of what our life looks like for the coming year.

So we actually receive an infusion of light in these 10 days up front,

All of the energy we will need for the whole year.

And what a lot of people don't know is that when you receive something in this world,

You actually awaken judgment.

So what is judgment?

What is that energy of judgment that we experience on a cosmic level?

It's only when we receive energy there's a judgment.

Kind of like the people who are most scrutinized in this world are the people of higher levels of position or who make higher incomes,

Who have more popularity.

There's more scrutiny upon them.

Because we as humans will scrutinize other humans who have more energy because we're always assessing,

Should this person have this?

Should they have this fame?

Should they have this title?

Do they deserve X,

Y,

And Z?

Not that we should be doing that,

But we end up doing that.

And in this world when you receive a lot of energy,

That's actually when you create a scrutiny from the upper worlds.

So during these 10 days,

It says it's 10 days that our soul is being built.

The first two days being called Rosh Hashanah,

Which are the most important.

It's the head of the 10 days.

So it's the source of the 10 days.

And so we're receiving all the light that we need for the whole year.

What is determined during these 10 days?

Person's financial status,

Person's relationship,

Person's children,

Their quantity and quality of life.

It's all happening in these 10 days.

Now that doesn't mean it can't be changed.

That doesn't mean that we can't elevate above that or go below that.

But the baseline is created in these 10 days.

And so these 10 days,

It's very important that we get as light as possible.

I know we talked about this on the prior show.

Let's get as light as possible.

Remove the burdens off of you.

How many of us are dragging burdens from the prior year into the new year?

And these burdens are often subconscious or unconscious.

I'm not talking about the ones we're aware of.

Talking about the things that we're upset about or that we're trying to control or we are obsessing about because we think we have control and we're carrying them into the new year and it's clogging the vessel.

It's clogging the vessel.

Right now,

I remember,

I don't know,

I forgot which child.

I mean,

I've lost track at this point with the amount of kids we have.

But when one of the,

I think it was my firstborn,

The doctor said,

You know what's interesting?

Your son has a heart that is brand new.

It's like a brand new heart.

Like a couple minutes,

Like a couple,

Whatever,

Depends on how you count it.

Let's say from the moment he's born,

It's a brand new heart.

And you kind of think,

Wow,

You have this pure thing and you're starting at like 100% purity.

You don't want to degrade that.

And this is kind of what those 10 days are like.

You get to start at a very pure level and the goal is just don't screw it up.

All right,

So these 10 days,

It's not cleaning myself,

Beating myself up.

Every time you're hard on yourself,

You actually ruin yourself.

Every time you're hard on yourself,

You ruin yourself.

It's just about you're handed something that is brand new in these 10 days.

Just get out of the way.

Don't overcomplicate it.

Have joy.

Have imagination.

Have endless,

Think endlessly.

Don't think limited.

We tend to think more and more limited as we get older.

We start to have more fears,

More negative belief systems.

We start capping our potential.

You kind of want to be a child in these 10 days.

You want to be light.

You want to be fun.

It's about being fun.

This is actually how the energy comes in.

This is what it means to be simple.

Let the energy come in,

Get out of the way.

If you're overly controlling,

Overly studying,

Overly assessing,

Assessing myself with my list of stuff,

What's right with me,

What's wrong with me,

All of that is just not allowing the light of the Creator to come in.

In these 10 days is when the light comes in full force.

And that starts tonight.

I mean,

This is.

.

.

No matter when you listen to this this week,

You're in the midst of it.

Yeah,

If you're listening this week.

If you listen this week.

And the truth is this is a lesson that if you could learn it preemptively,

If your kids,

David,

Could learn that the most dangerous thing to hold is a grudge,

We'd all be much healthier.

That's right.

That to me,

If you think about the way that the body works,

The body naturally functions to let things go.

And one of the amazing things the Kabbalists teach is that if you look at nature,

Nature is a direct reflection of the spiritual world,

Of spiritual energy.

So you look at the way that our bodies naturally work,

That nature naturally follows,

It's constantly releasing.

Flow is a sign of health.

Yet grudges or holding on to something someone said,

Something someone did,

Something that happened in the past is the opposite of that,

Which creates ultimately sepsis and death.

Sepsis?

I mean,

Just thinking about it.

I mean,

Honestly,

What happens when a person's body deteriorates is it stops being able to release,

Or the releasing process slows down so that toxins and whatever unwanted things begin to accumulate.

So part of what I think that one of the things that we don't realize is that we hold grudges,

Even subconsciously.

You can,

I mean,

I'm sure we have people who are listening that are like,

Yes,

I worked on this and I so and so did something to me and I let it go.

And even though I haven't forgotten,

I've forgiven.

And you know,

We have a lot of elevated,

Elevated people who listen to to our podcast.

At the same time,

I think that there's a lot of unconscious grudge holding going on that we might not even categorize as grudge holding.

And it's funny because in spirituality,

And especially in Kabbalah,

We learned that our childhood,

Most of us,

Okay,

Let's put it let's back up a second.

Most of the world,

Even the awakened world,

Looks at life as a series of events and says,

Okay,

When I was a child,

X,

Y,

And Z happened to me and that's why I have these tendencies now.

Kabbalah agrees with that.

Kabbalah explains that our childhood,

Our youth is the installation of the software that operates as adults so that we know what our soul came to work on.

But our childhood is not the cause.

Our child is simply the installation of the software.

Our soul before it comes down to the physical reality chooses certain situations,

Chooses certain characteristics and qualities,

Both positive and negative.

And part of our work in being human beings on planet Earth is to transform those negative slash selfish qualities.

So we might even choose to be born into a situation in which we could easily look at things as though they happen to us.

We were victims of X,

You know,

Describe your parents as you wish,

Or maybe something happened in school or somebody treated you,

You were bullied or whatever happened when you were younger.

Therefore,

You can't help but be this way and that way.

Anytime we give responsibility to a situation from our past or a person from our past,

We are essentially holding a grudge.

Unless we're able to actually bless that person or that situation,

We are still holding a grudge.

And it's very easy.

Hindsight is 20-20,

Right?

You can look at something that happened to your past that was difficult and say,

Oh,

It was the best thing that ever happened to me.

But you can also say,

He was still a jerk.

He was a jerk and it's the best thing that ever happened to me.

The subconscious,

He was a jerk,

Is still a grudge.

There is still a part of us that says it wasn't supposed to happen,

Or I made a mistake,

Or this is not the way,

I don't deserve this.

And a lot of that grudge holding is actually on the Creator.

We act like,

Or we feel like somehow it's not our fault.

We had nothing to do with it.

God is responsible.

We're angry at God.

We're angry at the universe,

Or subconsciously,

By blaming a person for creating our reality,

We are basically saying the universe took a vacation that day.

God skipped out on us and there's nothing we can do about it.

So part of the necessity of this week,

The opportunity of this week,

Is to recognize that everything in our past is exactly how it was supposed to be,

And to bless all of the actors who were hired to play those roles that make it look like you were hurt,

Or you were wronged,

Or you were shortchanged,

And to go forward without releasing all of that baggage,

Releasing that burden,

Because that baggage is taking the space of genuine light and blessings that you could be receiving right now.

That's right.

Sometimes you don't know what to do,

And all this stuff sounds overwhelming.

A simple tool to apply whenever you have free time is you bless people.

Send energy,

Visualize it however you want.

I sometimes like to visualize the person surrounded with a white light.

But the idea is when you're training your brain,

Your consciousness,

To think about somebody else,

Even if it's just blessing them,

Especially blessing the people that you're upset with,

You're changing physically and spiritually the chemical balance inside your body and soul.

And that is aligning itself energetically with the light of the Creator.

So it's even less about the person you're blessing.

It's about the process of training yourself to be a channel.

Now,

Of course,

The highest level of this is when we start to care about the other person,

But we're not there yet.

For the people that we have grudges against or upset with,

Or even if it's God,

Like you can bless God.

I feel like I didn't get into the how and the why,

But that doesn't make any sense what you just said.

It's about our process of blessing,

Sending energy so that we can train ourselves to be channels.

When we're thinking about ourselves too much and thinking about our process and our negativity and how we've been hurt and how are we going to be fulfilled?

This is what pushes fulfillment away.

We're actually pushing the light of the Creator away.

That's the paradox.

You think about yourself,

It means that the light doesn't have to think about you.

Now,

That doesn't mean you don't take care of yourself,

But it's more about,

I'm talking about when we are obsessed and anxious about ourselves.

A disconnects us from the light of the Creator.

In the movies we play in our mind of what people said,

What they didn't say,

What they gave me or they didn't give me,

What are they going to do or what are they not going to do?

All of that conversation is just a distraction from the opponent for us not to connect with the light of the Creator.

Those conversations mean nothing.

They actually are just,

We're being played by the opponent.

Just a game that the opponent is playing on us and it does not do anything to help you connect with the light.

Being with the light means you let go of all your thoughts and you're just in the mode of adding value and giving and being a channel because you'll know exactly what to give,

When not to give,

How to give.

You don't think about it.

When you're in the mode of giving,

The light tells you what to do.

Light tells you when to say no.

The light tells you when to set a boundary.

It can't be personal.

It's not your decision.

Get outside of your body.

Get outside of your physicality.

You know what's interesting is as I was thinking,

Looking for different content,

Different things to share on this week's episode,

I was looking,

I actually,

Someone wrote in a question a number of years ago that I answered.

So I think I'm just going to read the answer now live on camera,

On film.

It's so interesting.

So someone wrote in,

How do I let go of my past mistakes and those of others and truly move on?

I try,

But I find myself focused on the hurt others have caused me and use it to hurt them the same way they hurt me.

How do I let it go?

That to me,

First of all,

The person who wrote in will remain anonymous,

But I love that honesty.

The fact that they're admitting that they're keeping score and that the holding on to the past,

Holding those grudges is actually dictating their behavior now.

Okay,

So here's what I wrote back then and hopefully it'll still be relevant today.

It's human nature to hold onto guilt,

Grudges and the past.

However,

Kabbalah teaches that we are on this planet to transform our nature,

Not to be slaves to it.

Our universe is one of cause and effect.

That means that everything that happens in our lives is a direct result of a previous action or statement,

Whether in this lifetime or another.

That also means that if we want to change something in our lives,

Only we have the power to do it.

We need to change the causes so that the effects will be different.

Each time we allow a past action or statement to dictate our thoughts,

Feelings or actions,

We become an effect of the past.

I'm going to repeat that sentence again because that's the punchline.

Each time we allow a past action or statement to dictate our thoughts,

Feelings or actions,

We become an effect of the past.

That is really the problem with holding a grudge.

We are allowing something that happened,

Something someone did or said,

And sometimes we're holding the grudge against ourself or the creator,

That we are allowing that moment to create the present,

To create my thoughts,

Words and actions now.

That is against the conditions on which we decided to come to the physical reality.

We said we are here to become the cause.

The Kabbalists teach that that and appropriate to the energy that we have this week.

I'll go back to reading the answer in a minute.

Creation,

The story of creation,

According to Kabbalah,

Is the evolution of our universe from its origins,

Which is pure light,

Pure energy,

Pure goodness,

To everything we experience today.

The creation began,

If you're listening on Sunday,

Five days ago energetically.

On the 25th day of Virgo is the first day of creation.

You count six days after that.

Tonight,

Sunday night and Monday,

Is the day on which humanity,

The vessel,

Was created.

At that moment,

What really happened on the first day of creation,

Which then facilitated humanity on the sixth day,

Is that we,

The original soul,

All of humanity,

We said in order to truly experience fulfillment,

We have to be the creators.

We have to be in charge.

We have to be able to exercise that God-like energy that we've all been imbued with.

We can't do that when we're passive,

When we're the receivers,

When we are the effects.

The whole creation of this world is based on that caveat that we want to be the cause.

Yet holding a grudge is the opposite of that.

Holding a grudge puts us in the role of the effect again,

Which is what caused us that feeling of being the effect,

Of being powerless,

Of being smothered,

Of being disempowered,

Emasculated,

Use whatever word resonates with you.

That charge of,

I can't take that passivity anymore,

Is what caused us to come to the physical reality.

So we're going against the terms and conditions for which we came to the physical reality.

Now back to the answer.

We allow the other person or situation to be the cause.

No one and no thing deserves that kind of power over us.

In your situation,

And maybe now all our listeners can think of the situation in which they are holding a grudge.

In your situation,

You're allowing your past mistakes to dictate your present and future.

You're allowing others actions to make you think,

Feel,

And act this way or that.

You're giving the keys to the car of your life to others.

You are the only one meant to drive that car.

So the first step in letting go is the understanding that by holding on to the past,

No matter what it is,

Is.

.

.

Oh,

Okay,

Sorry.

The first step to letting go is the understanding that by holding on to the past,

No matter what it is,

You're perpetuating the darkness.

Whatever bad thing happened once upon a time,

The more you relive it,

The more you allow it to be the cause of your thoughts,

Words,

And actions now,

You're actually perpetuating that darkness,

Perpetuating the mistake,

Perpetuating the hurt,

Whatever it is.

While your mistake may have taken only a moment,

The fact that you are still holding on to it means that the darkness hasn't stopped.

Kabbalah teaches that if you can leave the past behind and focus instead on what you can do now,

You can actually eliminate the impact of the past.

And the Kabbalists knew that our willpower isn't always as strong as we'd like it to be.

So they provided us with the tools to give us the strength to let go of the past,

To move on from the past hurts,

And in other words,

To overcome our nature.

And we talk in Kabbalah about using different tools like the 72 names of God and the Zohar and different meditations to give us that energy.

But the basic,

I mean,

The wake up,

The aha moment is,

I don't want anybody to tell me how to feel or how to think or how to behave,

But that's what's happening as we're holding our grudges.

So to step back or out from that role of being passive,

Being the effect,

Being the vessel versus being the light,

We are all here to be the light.

And this week in looking at the amazing opportunity that we have,

Those 10 days being the essential creative moments for our future in,

Or let's say,

At least for the coming year,

We want to make sure that we are untethering anything from our past,

Whether it's from this year or the past year,

That may be holding us back,

That may be putting us in the role of the effect versus the cause.

What comes to my mind,

Actually,

I didn't think about it before,

But as I'm talking now is there's a very classic story in the Zohar where if you've read the Zohar,

You know that it's basically a conversation,

Which is also funny when you think about the podcast because it's also a conversation that we have and wisdom comes out of that conversation.

The Zohar is a conversation between a group of sages and sometimes it's conversation and sometimes it's retelling of stories and different things that happened to them,

Different things that they've learned.

So there's one story about two of the sages that were walking through the desert and they came across a person and one tells the other,

You know,

It's no coincidence that we came upon this guy,

Let's kind of hide in the bushes and see what happens.

I don't know that they hid in the bushes,

But they stood aside so that they weren't visible and they watched him.

And the guy was basically about to be,

He took a nap on the side of the hill and he was about to be killed by a snake when another snake came and killed the poisonous snake,

Which is not natural,

Right?

And then as he stood up from his nap,

The ledge on which he was sitting on the hill crumbled.

So these sages were like,

Wow,

You know,

In the span of a couple hours,

This man was saved from death twice.

He had two ridiculous miracles happen to him twice.

We have to find out what his secret is.

So they go up to him and they say,

Forgive us for intruding,

But you're not even aware,

But two very crazy miracles just happened to you.

You have to tell us your secret.

And what he says is that every night before he goes to sleep,

He recounts all of the people that did him wrong,

Remembers everything that happened during the day,

And not only forgives everyone,

But blesses them.

And if he finds somebody that he can't forgive,

Or that it's hard for him to let go,

He doesn't allow himself to fall asleep until he's forgiven them.

Now,

What made me think about it was what I was reading before that it's so against our nature to let things go.

And that's where the Kabbalists say,

Listen,

We were created as a vessel,

But we were created for the sake of transforming from vessel energy to light energy.

So on one hand,

Here we are as containers designed to hold energy,

But the truth is our work is to remove the bottom of that vessel,

The base of it,

So that we are channels.

The energy can flow through us and not pool,

Not get stuck in us.

And that story to me,

It does sound superhuman.

I can tell you every single person you've ever heard behind this microphone has the past,

Has issues that have things that have happened in this life,

In previous lifetimes that they're still holding on to.

We are all works in progress.

We are all trying to doing our best to let go of everything and anything that does not serve us.

But as we look into what we desire for ourselves in the coming year,

Correct me if I'm wrong,

You can write into us and let me know if I'm off here,

But we all want a reality that is better than we deserve.

I know that I'm working towards certain things.

I would rather have a miraculous and magical story than to have a logical,

Chronological,

Time sensitive story.

And this is the week in which we can exchange the logical for the miraculous.

And the Kabbalists teach the secret sauce is letting go of grudges.

The secret sauce is relieving and releasing the past to make room for a better future.

It's like the space that your past is holding is occupying blessings that you are refusing to let into your life because you can't let go of those grudges.

And so in the coming week,

As you notice those things come up,

What's interesting about this week the Kabbalists teach is that,

Okay,

Today is Sunday,

So we're about to enter this powerful week.

Monday and Tuesday are those,

As David mentioned in the beginning,

Rosh Hashanah,

The birth of humanity.

It's when the entire planet,

Every person on the planet is being renewed and recharged for the coming year and to the degree that we,

You know,

It's happening to us whether we're aware of it or not,

But the Kabbalists teach tools and technologies to connect with it not from a religious point of view,

Although it does involve prayer and meditation.

It is more from a what are you willing to do to free yourself from the self-imposed burdens and bondage,

That's the word,

Bondage that we've created for ourselves.

And then you have Tuesday,

Wednesday,

Thursday,

Friday,

Saturday,

Sunday,

And Monday.

So the middle seven days of this week,

Of these powerful 10 days,

It's an opportunity for us to correct,

To elevate and transform every single day from the past year.

So we've already been doing this.

Since the new moon of Virgo,

We've been uplifting,

Activating,

Transforming these,

The past.

Now we're doing it on a micro level where every Wednesday,

This coming Wednesday,

We have the opportunity through our thoughts,

Words and actions to elevate every Wednesday of the past year.

On Thursday through our thoughts,

Words and actions,

We have the opportunity to elevate every Thursday from the past year,

Meaning that download for all of the energy that we're going to use this year is not,

It hasn't concluded yet.

So we're still getting with every day,

Another opportunity to elevate and transform and let go.

And then coming into the following,

We'll have another episode next week,

Of course,

But Tuesday night and Wednesday is the most positive day of the year.

That's next week.

I'll look up the date really quickly next week,

Which is,

It falls out on the 4th and 5th,

October 4th and 5th.

So we'll prepare you for that next week,

Of course,

A little bit.

But the reality is that these can be just like any other day of the year,

Any other week of the year,

Any other month of the year,

Or they can be the amazing opportunities that they are meant to be.

What's also interesting,

And I'll wrap it up in a second,

Is that the Kabbalists teach,

I'm trying to think of how to back this up a little bit.

We always talk on the Weekly Energy Boost about the new moons and tonight is also the new moon of the month of Libra.

So I want to give at least two minutes to that.

Of course,

We can talk about it all month,

But just to preempt this,

We always talk on the Weekly Energy Boost about the new moon being the opportunity to genetically modify the seed of the coming month.

Obviously,

If this is the beginning of the year for humanity,

It's an even bigger seed to genetically modify.

But what that also means on some level is that we're shifting from the Virgo energy of critical scrutiny,

Judging,

Etc.

That we've been talking about into Libra,

Which is represented by the scales.

What really happens in the month of Libra is that our life from the past year is being taken into account.

The positive on one side,

The negative on the other.

And through the first 22 days of the month,

There's different energetic things happening that are resulting in an assessment of what's the reality we deserve versus what's the unlimited reality that we're asking for ourselves.

And as such,

Throughout the month,

And especially look out for that in these first 10 days of the month,

We are going to be pulled into that mindset of should.

And as David said,

And I read in the letter as well,

Anytime we are looking at something from a place of should or shouldn't,

We're judging.

And we really want to let go of that as well.

Obviously,

Holding a grudge is judging someone or something as the cause incorrectly.

So anytime we fall into that place of judgment,

The tendency to judge,

If you have Libra and friends,

They're amazing.

They're lovely.

Honestly,

If you look at them,

They have very little that at least is perceived from the external,

From the outside point of view that could need to change.

Yet on the inside,

They are plagued by the shoulds.

And that should and shouldn't and being able to see all of the options often creates in their lives paralysis.

Analysis creates paralysis,

Right?

And so we want to be careful that we don't find ourselves we don't allow ourselves to fall prey to that tendency as well.

So this is a huge week for all of us to the degree that we're aware of it,

We can take advantage of it,

We can utilize it as a catapult for spiritual growth and expansion and enlightenment.

The unlimited of the self is really what it's all about.

And we'll continue to talk more about that next week.

Please continue to rate and review if you haven't given us a review on whatever platform you're listening,

Please do that right now.

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And we'll see you next week on the weekly energy boost.