How To Be Real In A Fake World - Weekly Energy Boost

Good morning everyone,

Good evening,

Good afternoon wherever you are and welcome to this week's Weekly Energy Boost.

My name is Ellie Sheva and I'm here this lovely Monday morning with David and we are super excited for David to pull the mic closer to him.

And to share with you this week's secrets,

Principles,

Wisdom,

Nuggets to help you navigate not only this coming week but your entire lives.

We're focusing on how to be real in a fake world and the title itself is a little fake.

It's not really what we're going to talk about,

I'm just kidding.

We are going to talk about that.

But in regards to the opportunities that this week is providing us for growth,

For expansion,

And for living into the powerful souls that we are meant to be,

That we really are.

That's really the essence.

If you want to listen to one sentence,

If we were just our true selves,

All of the nonsense would pretty much go away.

The problem is,

And David will speak to this I'm sure,

The problem is,

The diagnosis kabbalistically is that because we're accommodating the audience rather than genuinely radiating our essence,

That's how we complicate our lives,

How we attract chaos,

How we end up in repetitive patterns that don't serve us,

And by being more authentic and knowing.

I think it starts with knowing who we really are and hopefully we'll get to talk about that as well today.

But knowing who we really are and being that person unapologetically,

Unabashedly is actually the way to eliminate the drama,

The chaos,

And the challenges,

One of the main ways to eliminate challenges from our lives.

This week's energy especially is the second week of the Omer.

We talked about this last week,

That it is connected to the 49-day period of time that we can achieve the highest level of correction of our soul and purification of who we are.

The second week that is called Givurah,

Which relates to strength or judgment,

Has to do with the aspect of ourselves that is actually very powerful.

It's the aspect of ourselves that can give us the strength to achieve,

To set boundaries.

It's where we get that internal energy to do the impossible,

To drive desire.

So this is a very powerful aspect of ourselves.

Tends to get a bad rap.

And for the reason which we'll say in a moment,

Because last week was more the merciful side of us,

Our ability to have compassion and to share and to care,

To feel and have empathy,

This week has to do with a different superpower.

However,

Because this superpower is so powerful,

The negative forces also are attracted to it.

The negative forces of this world,

That there are spirits and entities and almost like demons,

They say.

They call it- David loves to use the D word.

Demons.

They exist in this world.

We sometimes talk about them.

We don't go too in depth in our podcast,

But they exist and they are what the sages tell us is they are light without a vessel almost.

These entities were created because sparks of light were released,

But there was no vessel to capture them in the right way.

It's almost like when we reveal energy or we do something,

Let's say you give someone advice and they don't want to hear your advice or they're not willing to receive it or it's bad timing.

You've released energy without the vessel there to come and take that energy.

They're not open to hearing you.

So it means there's no vessel.

It means that you have created actually a demon.

Think about that.

When you give advice and somebody doesn't want to hear it,

You create negative entities.

You create demons.

Do you like that?

That's a good sound.

I connected that.

I have a more benign metaphor I like to use with myself.

I like the shock and awe approach.

So – sorry,

I'm taking off my sweater.

It's getting warm in here,

I got to say.

So this week,

We can finesse and harness and fine-tune that superpower of ours knowing when and how to say no to set boundaries,

But also knowing when to let go.

But because it's such a powerful energy,

Setting boundaries is such a powerful energy.

Most people don't know how to set boundaries,

Especially with themselves and their own addictions,

That the negative forces attach themselves to this and they want to be part of the relationship that you're having with your spiritual work.

And that's why it's very hard.

So this week,

We can cleanse all of the things around judgment,

Judging others,

Judging ourselves,

Manipulation when we're trying to take energy too soon because we can't help ourselves.

We feel addiction.

We feel that we are – no one is going to take care of us.

No one loves us.

We're not going to have what we want.

So we try to find ways to take it sooner than later.

That's the energy that we have this week that we can cleanse.

And then we can give a couple of tools of what to do this week.

But please.

I think when it comes to boundaries or maybe I'll back up a little bit.

When it comes to authenticity,

I often ask people,

What would you do if you knew you could not fail,

Right?

That means to me,

It's not about skydiving or writing that screenplay or many of those other things that we may be tabling because it's not practical or it doesn't make sense right now or I don't want to be rejected.

But more in terms of – well,

Maybe it's the last one I just said.

That if you knew you could speak freely,

You could be yourself and never encounter rejection and never encounter hurt and never be shamed or fail,

How would you live your life?

And I think that one of the lessons of the last year and a half or so has been what do you have to lose,

Right?

Don't stop spending time on the wrong things.

Stop commuting to work.

Stop purchasing from companies that are not aligned with your values.

But if you think about it,

We calculate.

We say,

Well,

How should I say this so that it will be received the right way?

How do I present myself so that I'll get the job?

How do I present myself on the date so there will be a second date?

We're constantly in this negotiation of the self that doesn't allow – aside from the fact that it doesn't allow people to actually get to know us,

It really is allowing other people to set boundaries for us.

That to me is one of the big problems with living in this social media age with everything is posted and shared and liked and commented and you have trolls.

I'm sure it's an issue.

I think about sometimes we get very funny DMs and social media but the more out there you are,

The more followers you have,

The more horrible people can be.

I follow somebody on Instagram who – food-related but her mom passed away and she was sharing some posts,

Some things she was experiencing and somebody wrote to her,

Nobody cares,

Stick to your food or something like that,

Right?

And to me,

Like oh my god,

I guess being in the – I don't know,

I feel like sometimes we live in a bubble,

David and I and so we have a bit of a filter that prevents some of the trash of the world from getting thrown at us or even seeing it get thrown at anybody else.

When I saw she posted that,

I thought to myself,

How terrible and at the same time,

What are they basically saying,

Stop being you.

We don't want to be you.

We want to see the glossy plates of food you create and your recipes but we don't want to see you.

And what a powerful depiction of exactly what's wrong with the world right now is that we are allowing the audience to determine who we are rather than allowing who we are to determine our audience.

And that is a really powerful awakening we can come to this week and I'm going to say it again.

We allow the audience to determine the performance rather than to allow the performer to determine the audience.

And this comes from one main place and it's an extension of what we talked about last week that in Kabbalah 1,

We talk about when you feel lack and you enter that challenging zone that is the reason why you came to this world.

That is your purpose.

That is life's purpose when you feel that way.

So when you feel confused,

When you're not sure when you're going to get what you want,

This is actually the greatest moment of your life at that moment.

This is why you came here.

This is why we all came here.

And there's a tool that we learned called restriction.

Restriction means restrict your desire for instant gratification and to feed the monster that is just trying to perpetuate the same habitual addictive behavior.

When you restrict,

You reveal the light.

The light comes in the light of the Creator and then you can solve your problem.

When you don't restrict,

You connect to instant gratification and there's chaos.

And we explain all the reasons why that is the way it is.

Well,

There's two kinds of restriction.

There's fake restriction and there's real restriction.

Fake restriction is I do the right thing in the moment but I'm doing it because I don't want people to judge me.

I want to look a certain way.

So I do the right thing but it's more about how do I get your approval.

I do the right thing to get your approval.

I do the right thing because you're looking.

I do the right thing because you're looking.

That's right.

Real restriction really comes down to you know that even though it feels bad and it feels like you don't have what you want and it feels like you're not going to get what you want,

You tell yourself that's an illusion.

The light is here.

Everything is okay and I have everything I want.

But that is the only spiritual work.

And when you know that everything is okay and the light is there,

Well where is the light?

Well,

You don't feel it.

It's temporarily concealed from you to give you the free will to choose the light.

If the light was revealed all the time and you felt great all the time,

When are you choosing to do your spiritual work?

So real restriction,

This is what separates the men from the boys,

Is do you have the strength in a time of pain to remind yourself and inject what we call chesed because this is the week of givurah and the way you sweeten givurah is with chesed.

The way you sweeten the judgment is with mercy and mercy means I believe or I want to believe.

I'm injecting that effort.

The light is really here.

Everything I want.

In fact,

I already have a soulmate.

I have endless abundance.

I have all the healing.

Whatever it is that you're worried you're not,

You need to remind yourself that's an illusion that you're not that thing because if you believe that the light is there and the light is giving you that,

Then you have that consciousness,

Then actually that will become your reality.

But because we feel we don't have something,

Then we react and we become manipulative and we start to manipulate the world.

And that's when we go down the rabbit hole of trying to get people to like us because we start to think that it's these people who will give us a job,

These people who will give us a deal,

These people who will introduce me to someone and I'm going to meet my soulmate,

It's these people who will love me and respect me and give me power and a sense of purpose.

And it's just not true.

So this is the most powerful week to do real restriction,

Which is as soon as it's painful,

You say,

No,

The light is there.

Nothing's changed.

It wasn't painful 10 minutes ago and now it's painful.

What changed?

Nothing changed.

The light is still there.

You said something that I think can be confusing that I also think is an important thing to break down.

David talked a minute ago about how sometimes we can be compelled to do the right thing because someone is watching or we want some sort of approval or acknowledgement.

While that reveals some light,

Great,

It's obviously not our destiny,

That kind of behavior.

But I think what can be tricky about that situation is,

And it completely speaks to the idea of this fake reality that we live in,

Not just the illusionary physical reality,

But also the illusions that are demanded of us to keep up,

To maintain,

So that we fit into what's going on,

Is that idea of right.

What is the right thing to do?

And I had a conversation with somebody not long ago and a big part of what was weighing her down was somebody wasn't doing the right thing.

And I think that there's a lot of divisiveness that's happening now in our world because I think that what I believe is right and you think that what you believe is right and there's no meeting of the minds.

There's no bridge to close the gap between what I feel is right and what you feel is right.

And I always get teased for trying to be politically correct and not wanting to step on anybody's toes or not wanting to ruffle anybody's feathers.

But when it comes to this idea of doing the right thing,

It's not about right versus wrong or just,

The word just coming from justice,

Right?

Making sure that what is the correct thing is done.

What David was talking about is looking for the option that's going to reveal the maximum,

That's going to have the maximum benefit for everyone involved in the long run.

It's not a question.

There is no,

This is not a moral question.

That's what I wanted to make sure that everybody realizes.

We're not talking about morals and ethics here because if you're focused on morals,

You're always going to be miserable.

That's one of the things that the great Kabbalist,

Rav Ashlak speaks about a lot is that the problem is when you know that morals and ethics are not the right way to navigate things because they vary from culture to culture,

Country to country.

And what is true is true for all people.

So what David is really talking about is according to those universal spiritual laws,

That by me letting go of the need to fill that lack,

I'm going to say what he said before in different ways,

Sometimes we're motivated to let go of the need to fill that lack because other people are around or other people could judge me.

Not because it's the right thing to do or the wrong thing to do or the just thing to do or the fair thing to do,

But rather it's the most elevated option to choose in that given situation.

And the something that we were talking about before that in those writings of Rav Ashlak and I think it's also part of the 10 Luminous Emanations which is the deepest study of Kabbalah within the wisdom of Kabbalah is the idea that the Creator created this world,

Right?

That our universe is the result of this universal forces quality of sharing,

Quality of goodness.

We were talking about that last week,

That that energy of chesed is in a way that natural force.

And we are the audience to that force.

We are the receivers.

We are the consumers,

If you will,

Of that beneficence.

And so it is our nature,

We were created and we desired to be like in affinity,

Similarity of form with that force.

So we also,

It is natural for us to seek an audience as well,

To perform.

And spiritually speaking,

Normally we use the words to share,

To influence,

To give,

To initiate,

To be the cause.

But at the end of the day,

If we're honest with ourselves,

We're looking for an audience.

We want to know that what we have given has added value.

We want to know that we have made a difference,

Right?

Most charitable donations are made because we want to feel like we made a difference,

Right?

We saw that there was a lack and we want to rescue whoever needs it.

Recognizing,

And this is really where the conversation of being authentically us or going back to our root,

Really this is the conversation that I wanted to start,

Is if we go back to our origins,

If we go back to the reason we were created that you alluded to before,

It's to be like the creator,

Right?

There's something else we talk about in Kabbaluwan,

That the way that we draw more light into our life,

The way that we amplify the experience of the light in our life is by being light-like.

And naturally the light desires to share.

The light desires,

It's not even a desire.

It's essence,

The way that it's experienced is by adding value.

So in our daily lives,

And this is something that I encourage everybody to look at this week,

If you look at the areas in which you strive to add value,

It may be at home,

It may be at work,

Whether work is a physical place or it's simply a mission,

A project,

A quest,

Maybe you're in school and the goal is to contribute not only to your classmates,

But to your future.

We're always trying,

If we really get in touch with our essence,

We're really only motivated by our desire to add value.

Even when we're looking for selfish pleasures,

It's not just about taking or instant gratification,

It's instant gratification often comes from the audience,

Right?

I want to feel good.

I know who to call when I want to feel good.

When I'm feeling upset and I need to vent,

I know which friend not to call because they're going to tell me I'm being ridiculous and it's all in my head.

I'm not going to call that friend because that friend isn't going to be the audience that gives me the fix I need to feel that I've added value.

Even if the value is drama,

Right?

I made a difference by saying,

By like that guy who wrote to that person on Instagram,

Stop talking about your,

Go back to posting food pictures.

He wanted to see that she got upset.

Now I know that that's not value,

But that's impact.

We all want to see that we're having impact and this is the week to recognize that the measure of our impact is not in how we were received,

Right?

We want the boundary I think that we all need in order to be more healthy,

Authentic,

And to live with integrity is I am not going to allow the audience to determine who I am,

How I show up.

If you're honest,

You have one,

Most of us,

I won't say everybody,

But most of us have one persona we put on with our family and then we have another persona we put on when we're at a work meeting and then we have another persona we put on at the supermarket and we have another persona we put on when nobody's looking and we're in bed alone and it's 3 a.

M.

In the dark.

We have these costume changes that we go through throughout the day and that is again allowing the audience to tell us who to be,

Right?

It's the original social media,

Right?

You're on Instagram,

You're one person,

But at home you're another and this is the week to break that addiction,

To put up the boundaries,

To say this is who I am.

It doesn't matter if you like it.

I mean I wouldn't go to your office and say something.

This is not permission to behave badly like that person on Instagram.

It's really to go back and to be in touch with the force within me that desires to add value,

To be good.

I don't mean good meaning behave,

But to be a force for good and to allow that to be my compass rather than how many likes did I get,

Are my parents happy with what I'm doing in life,

Did my husband recognize the intense labor I put into dinner last night or all the other measures of our value that we have allow the knowledge that I am a spark of the light force of the creator to determine my value and to operate from there.

The one thing that I wanted to pull from what you said is the addiction we have to making an impact and the desire to help people is great and that's altruism and that's all wonderful,

But it's interesting because the negative side will take the desire to help people and transform it to the addiction to help people and then we start looking to receive more than we're looking to give.

It's almost powerful to take a week,

This week's energy.

It's almost powerful?

I'm trying to be more politically correct as opposed to just telling people what to do trying to ease it in there.

It's almost- It's almost the right thing to do.

It's almost the right thing,

Meaning I want you to choose it.

I want you to choose it.

It might be the right thing to do.

I don't want to tell you it's the right thing to do obviously,

But it's almost powerful to this week- That's a good title for a TV show by the way,

Almost powerful.

It's almost powerful to do things this week that are giving that have no impact.

We are only excited to do things that make a difference.

It's almost like we abhor the idea of doing something positive that has no impact whatsoever.

What's an example of something positive that has no impact?

I don't think that there is such a thing.

I think it's more of the who's watching the impact happen.

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears it,

Did it make a sound?

There are those people like maybe me and you that feel like,

Well,

I'm not going to give a podcast if two people are listening.

So that would be,

Let's say it was two people.

Would we- Shout out to those two people.

Would we get in a car and drive over here and give up a couple of hours of time for that?

Now I'm not saying that is a good use of our time in general,

But there probably needs to be at least one time a year where that happens to us and it's going to happen now obviously that I'm saying it and we're going to be upset about it.

Then we're going to be like,

Wait a minute,

Now is the time to do the same act of giving when it's making no difference or we think it's making no difference,

But the audience isn't there.

It's more to train us to get over the addiction because Kabbalah is two things.

It says that if you want to achieve your purpose in this lifetime,

There's two corrections that have to be made.

One is to maximize the value you give to the world,

Which everybody understands that,

But also to cleanse the negativity that we came to the world with.

Sometimes we get lost in the pursuit of helping other people.

We forget that the negativity is along for the ride and it's chasing us.

When we're helping people,

The negativity is also there by our side.

When we're giving advice,

The negativity is right there on our shoulder giving the same advice.

This is also why sometimes when you're doing the right thing,

It will totally go the other way to see if you're willing to keep doing the right thing.

Willing to do the right thing,

Whatever that thing is in the moment,

Without the addiction or the approval of people looking at you or giving you feedback immediately and whatnot.

I mentioned this in Kabbalah 1 a couple of weeks ago.

The way life works is you do the right thing,

Then something bad happens.

Then you have certainty.

You keep doing the right thing,

Then something good happens.

People are looking for something great to happen after they do the right thing.

That's just not the way it's designed.

It's designed on purpose that something bad will happen after you do the right thing to give you the free will to choose it again.

If you got high or suddenly got a check of a million dollars every time you did the right thing,

You would lose the free will.

In fact,

You would do the right thing but from your need for approval,

Your need for success side because it would be trained.

You're just training your negativity to do the right thing.

You're not choosing it.

It's a powerful concept.

David,

When we were talking before about what we were going to talk about,

You said something that intrigued me that I'd like to hear you unpack and that was giving birth to the baby too soon.

Did I say that right?

Nobody wants the baby to come out too soon.

You want the baby to mature and come out exactly what it needs to.

You don't want it to come out three months early and be in the NICU.

In the same way,

If you're supposed to have a relationship in nine months,

The soulmate is coming in nine months but you take it earlier or you take.

.

.

It's all manipulation.

Every time we feel like we need to manipulate,

We're kind of trying to make the baby come too soon.

Picking the fruit before it's ripe.

Picking the fruit before it's ripe.

You can't put the fruit back on the tree.

You pick it.

That's so powerful.

You can't put the fruit back on the tree.

It's almost like when you're cutting your hair,

You don't know how short to go.

And you say,

Too short,

Too short.

You can't put the hair back on but you could always take a little and then take a little more.

That's why restriction is so powerful.

Don't take too much.

Take a little and then recalibrate.

That's an important message also with regards to boundaries setting because I think it happens to a lot of people when they get into relationships.

I see this most with romantic relationships that the excitement is so great that people run head first into the relationship and give way too much for fear of losing it if they don't.

Now,

Also the start.

.

.

We're starving for that energy,

That attention.

Maybe you haven't had it for a while.

It's kind of like when you're really thirsty and there's water.

You drink so fast.

You start choking on it.

Or your stomach hurts after.

Your stomach hurts after.

You know when you're too thirsty?

You start pounding the water and you start choking.

That's what the relationship is like.

Maybe for four years you were in a bad one.

You never got a I love you or I thank you.

It was always just dragging you along.

Finally,

You met a guy or a girl that's just so enamored by you and you're just chugging on that water and you just choke on it.

That's what happens.

Choke.

You kind of take sips.

Now then there's the extreme where you just were in the desert for a couple of days and you've had no water for three or four days and you see water.

They always tell you.

Sip slowly.

Sip slowly.

Remember when we fast?

We fast a couple of times a year.

You see that?

See that whatever it is.

You see that watermelon or that apple or that water or whatever and you just want to eat all of it all at once.

Stomach.

Well,

But at the same time,

There is a – let's put it this way.

There is an illusion that's very believable telling us you lost it before.

You're going to lose it again.

Better take advantage of every second you've got right now.

Right.

That's the illusion.

That's the illusion.

That's the test.

The test is everybody this week and the coming six weeks are going to be riddled with illusion and you can't hear it enough.

I can tell you for myself when I forget it,

I think,

Oh my god,

The 30 seconds I forgot it's the Omer,

That's when I get hit.

So it affects all of us.

It's sort of like the weather.

You can't really avoid it.

The best you can do is hold in your consciousness.

Keep it in your mindset.

Remind yourself every morning.

Even put it as an intention every morning.

Please fill in the blank,

Light,

Creator,

God,

Universe,

Spirit,

Whatever.

Help me stay aware that I am going to be tempted by the illusion that I need this or it needs me,

Or I'm going to lose it if I don't and do not compromise on what's really important to you.

That's what happens with a lot of people.

With the most spiritual people,

With the best intentions,

Just as a side note,

I had a few conversations in the last month with different people,

Not during this time period that we're even talking about,

Where they were saying,

Well,

I can't do this because,

You're going to love this David,

I can't come because my family is going to be upset with me.

Or somebody I know was going on a trip and they said,

I have no one to take care of my dog so I can't go on the trip.

So if you have something you desire that you are not doing because of how someone else will feel or won't feel,

Because of some responsibility,

If you really want to,

If you're not hiding behind the responsibility,

If you really want,

If there's something important for you to do,

Do not allow the other people and how they may or may not feel to prevent you.

That's really the,

I think if we leave you with one final thing this week,

It's that other people do not have the right to determine how you live your life.

And that boundary,

Holding that boundary,

You may be upset with this,

I'm still going to do it,

You may not like it,

Doesn't matter,

I respect your feelings,

But I'm still going to do it.

And knowing that by living in who you really are,

Which is a spark of the light force of the creator,

And being constantly in tune,

Listening to the nudgings of the guidance of that spark,

You will always be led to the right thing at the right time at the right place.

And that's when we allow the external to interfere with those decisions,

That we find ourselves attracting challenges and drama,

It may be uncomfortable,

Setting that boundary will be uncomfortable in the moment,

But the long term,

It will lead to greater blessings and more fulfillment.

Beautiful.

Please come back next week where we'll be sharing even more opportunities on how you can navigate the coming week and the coming life,

Lifetime.

And we'll see you next week on the Weekly Energy Boost.