Authenticity For Success-LL&L LIVE-5-24-21

Welcome to Life,

Lessons,

And Laughter with your host,

Glenn Ambrose.

There.

Hello,

Hello,

Hello,

Hello everybody.

Welcome to the show.

I'm going to go into the privacy settings and see if I can see how I can make sure I see your comments because I've been having trouble seeing comments.

Everything's showing public,

So I might be good.

We will see.

So,

I hope everybody's doing well.

It's a Monday at 6 p.

M.

Eastern.

I believe this is probably going to be the time I'm going to try to stay consistent with.

Five seemed a little bit early,

So six seemed to be a little bit better for people,

So I'm going to try this.

Let's see how that goes.

So,

Today I am talking about one of my favorite subjects.

I'm talking about authenticity.

So,

Where to begin,

Where to begin.

This is like this is a huge topic,

So I'm not exactly sure where it's going to go,

What aspects of authenticity I'm going to talk about because it's such a big topic and such an important topic that it can veer off and you guys know how I do.

I just kind of let stuff flow,

So we'll see where it ends up.

Let me click over to the comments.

Hey,

Sarah's back.

Hi,

Sarah.

Yes,

She missed one whole episode,

I think.

Oh my God.

But welcome back.

So,

Yeah,

So authenticity.

So,

I'm going to head in the direction,

I'm going to head into the topic in this direction and in this direction I'm talking about we don't have to sacrifice who we are to be successful.

We have to be true to it and that's successful in every area of life which leads me right into this big vast area of different avenues I can go down.

So,

Before I do,

I'm going to comment on Sarah's comment.

Sorry,

I missed.

Mondays are a bit tougher.

You know that that comment reminds me of when I was going to a spiritualist church in Rhode Island years ago and I didn't go for a few weeks and the next time I went I saw the pastor of the church and she gave me a big hug and I said,

Oh,

I'm so sorry I haven't come in a few weeks.

I did this,

I did that,

I had that going on and I went to climb up and then I knocked with my son and she looked at me and she goes,

Glenn,

You don't have to explain yourself to me.

You don't have to come every week.

It doesn't matter if you're not here.

I'm sure you have something else to do and when you are here I'm happy to see you.

So,

It's fine.

And I was like,

Oh my God,

That's so refreshing.

Susan the pastor of the church said that to me and gave me a big hug and I was like,

Wow,

That's so cool.

So,

I'm going to say it to you,

Sarah.

I know that I tease you because you missed the show but it's all good.

It's all good in the neighborhood.

So,

Don't worry about it.

When you're here,

Great.

When you're not,

It's okay.

I understand.

And hello to Lisa,

My childhood friend.

So,

Yeah,

Here we go.

So,

Like I got to figure out where the hell I'm going to come in on this.

So,

Because I kind of want to come in on not sacrificing who you are but then that just the big thing that keeps jumping out at me is we don't understand why we are sacrificing who we are in the first place.

So,

If we don't understand why we're doing what we're doing,

Maybe we should touch on that.

So,

What I'm going to do is I'm just going to dive right into this and I'm glancing over.

Yes,

Sarah,

I know you don't know you have to and I'm glad that you like to.

And Nicole just got off work.

She made it for the live show instead of watching the replays,

Which is exciting.

Thank you,

Guys.

So,

I think what I'm going to do is I'm going to touch on that opening sentence a little bit and then probably go into the why of it.

So,

You don't have to sacrifice who you are to be successful.

You have to be true to it.

It's the only real way to be really successful is being true to who you are.

We are all unique.

We all have our own fingerprint.

We all have our own way of interacting with reality.

We are an expression of the divine that's individualized to ourselves through our own personality.

And we spend a lot of time trying to figure out what we're supposed to do to be successful.

Like,

What is our niche?

A lot of times people go what is my niche?

And what they're doing is they're looking externally and trying to find a niche that society has that they can fill and that's backwards.

Like we just have to be us.

That's the only way we're going to be successful.

And I think that this hit me hard several years ago when I was kind of flashing back over my life and understanding on a deeper level why I was so rebellious and what a lot of my problems were when I was younger with society and school and all that stuff that I rebelled against.

I was like why was I so rebellious?

Why couldn't I just fit in?

For me it felt like I could not just buy in.

I couldn't drink the Kool-Aid.

And when I look back on it now I understand that there was a part of me that knew the truth.

Just like there's a part of all of us that knows the truth.

And for some reason I just was not able to let go of my grip of the truth.

And that's what society was trying to get me to do.

By making me sit at a desk for six,

Eight hours a day when I was a kid.

By trying to tell me that I needed to be at the same proficiency level in every one of these categories.

I had to be the same as everybody else in all these areas.

And I had to pay attention to stuff that I had no interest in.

And that I needed to shut up when an adult talked even if they were being a jackass.

And all this stuff,

I just didn't understand it.

I think on some level I knew the truth.

Like I said,

We all do on some level,

Deep.

But society is conditioning us so much.

It's just daily,

Man.

Daily from the time you're a baby that your parents are trying to teach you the ways of being in society,

Even in their own house.

And it's not their fault.

I mean,

It was done to them.

This has been passed on for thousands of years.

And we're finally breaking out of it now.

But it's that you have to eat at a certain time,

Not when your body tells you.

And you have to do this.

And you have to go to school from these hours.

And you have to do this that you're not interested in.

And that you're not good at.

And you don't like it.

And you have to do it anyway.

And you have to follow all these rules that don't make sense.

And I was just like,

No,

This can't be true,

Man.

This can't be true.

And what I decided to do was rebel on every level with it.

And my problem at that age was that I didn't know what the truth was.

Like somewhere in there,

I had forgotten my truth through the domestication process.

So I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

I just knew that I couldn't be who they wanted me to be.

Sometimes I couldn't.

I couldn't sit still in class that long.

I couldn't keep focused attention for that long.

So in my case,

I knew what I couldn't do.

I just didn't know what it was supposed to look like when I did do it.

And then now,

After I woke up spiritually and started living my life in a new way,

Then all of a sudden I'm like,

Oh,

This is what I was supposed to be doing the whole time.

I didn't know this.

But now I get it.

So the missing piece from our childhood,

I think,

And it definitely was for me,

Is that I knew society was full of shit.

Knew it.

But I didn't know how to replace something that worked.

Replace what society was telling me to do with something that worked.

I didn't know what that thing that worked was.

What I knew was that I couldn't do what society was telling me,

So I wouldn't.

And then that was all I knew.

So that was kind of where I stopped.

Which,

Obviously that's a problem.

I got involved into a lot of trouble and I was turned to alcohol and was very unsuccessful for many years because of all that,

Because I didn't know what I was supposed to do.

All I knew was what I couldn't do.

And that was do what society told me to do.

So what the missing piece was authenticity.

That was the missing piece.

That's what I'm supposed to do.

That's what you're supposed to do.

That's what we're all supposed to do.

We're supposed to be us.

That's what we're supposed to do.

If you're not good at math,

You're not supposed to work really,

Really,

Really hard at math.

You're supposed to not do math.

That's why you're not good at it.

That's all.

I mean,

Not everybody's supposed to be good at math.

Not everybody has to be good at math.

We're all supposed to be doing things.

We're supposed to be living in community with one another,

Which actually I got to do a podcast on independence because that's a fallacy too that we've taken way too far is the need for independence.

We're supposed to be living in community with one another.

We're not supposed to be independent the way we are now.

We've taken out way too far.

So what we're supposed to be is authentic.

And how can we be authentic?

So if we're trying to figure out how to be authentic,

Should we be looking at what society taught us or what society says we should do?

Well,

No,

That's not really going to help us.

How is society going to tell us what's authentic to us?

We have to determine what's authentic to us.

Well,

How would we do that?

How would I know what's authentic to me?

Well,

We use our guidance system and our guidance system is basically pleasure,

Joy,

Happiness,

Contentment,

Enthusiasm.

You know,

Enthusiasm is a great word because it's based in the Greek,

I believe in Theos,

Which means within God.

So like we are in alignment with God when we are enthusiastic about something.

You know,

That's where the that's where the enthusiasm comes.

That's where the energy comes from when we're connected to source.

So when we have enthusiasm for something,

That's that is a symptom that it's part of our authentic self because somebody else is being exposed to the same thing and they are not enthusiastic about it.

They find it boring and that's how they know it's not part of their authenticity.

You know,

So the things that capture our interests,

Capture our interests for a reason.

They are either part of our authentic purpose or they are pointers that we're supposed to be following at least for a little while to take us on the next step to find our authentic purpose.

It's just all being authentic.

What feels right?

That's what the guidance system is.

We get so complicated about like what we try intellectualizing what am I supposed to do?

What am I not supposed to do?

What's good for me to do?

What's not good for me to do?

It's just pay attention how you feel.

That's all.

Most people believe in some sort of loving force or overarching loving energy.

Like the five major religions in the world all believe in one God technically.

Some of them call it like a oneness energy type field or something.

You know,

But whatever it is they all believe in one divine intelligence that governs everything.

Plus all the other people who aren't in the five major religions or have been taught that.

Most people believe in some sort of loving power.

Why would that?

What sense would it make for the system to be designed in a way that you felt like crap or you were uninterested in what you were supposed to do?

Why?

What sense does that make?

How are we supposed to know we're supposed to do it?

Oh whatever feels like crap that's what I'm supposed to do.

No,

It's what feels good.

It's what captures our attention.

It's what we get excited about.

One of the best ways I think to phrase this is it's what is cool.

Whatever we think is cool.

You know my friend Brian Reed gave my favorite example of this and he told me a story about how this helicopter skier was getting interviewed about skiing and he said,

Oh yeah,

You know I like skiing with this guy all the time.

And she said,

Well why do you like skiing with this guy?

And he said,

Well he picks a different line than I do.

But his line's cool and I like my line and we can kind of talk about skiing the different lines and we don't argue about a line.

And she was like,

Oh so you have a line when you ski?

Like how does that work?

How do you pick your line?

And he said,

Well we get out of the helicopter and we walk to the edge of the mountain and we look down on all this fresh snow and we kind of go,

Oh I think I'd like to go down that way and then maybe cut over in that direction and then head down over there.

That'd be cool.

And then I do that.

And she's like,

That's how you pick your line.

Like you,

You like,

There's many ways for you to die doing this and the way you figure out what you're going to do and how you're going to get down the mountain is you look and you go,

That'd be cool.

And he's like,

Yeah.

So,

And my friend Brian,

He's like,

That's the best reason to do anything.

And I agree with him a hundred percent because if you pay attention to the energy in your body,

If you pay attention to how you feel in your body,

When you're just looking at something like that,

That you want to do and you go,

Oh,

That'd be cool.

There's no intellect involved at that particular moment.

You're not making logical sense of why you should do it or why you shouldn't do it.

You're just completely in your body and you're following your guidance system.

Oh,

That'd be cool.

That's the best reason because that's something you can get enthusiastic about.

That's something you're in alignment with divine wisdom with.

That's not an accident.

You know,

We need to learn to pay attention to these things.

These that'd be cool feelings.

You know,

That,

That is the best reason to do anything.

So anything that makes you feel alive,

Captures your attention,

Makes you feel enthusiastic,

Just kind of makes you go,

That'd be cool.

That would be cool.

It's not cool for somebody else.

It could not be cool for the person right next to you in the same situation.

Maybe it is.

Maybe it's part of their authentic path too.

But a lot of times it's not.

And that's,

That's great because it's your authentic path and that's how you're supposed to know.

So this is part of picking our,

Our,

Our path,

You know,

And understanding that the reason that most people don't do this and we head away from our authenticity is because of our domestication process.

Just like most of the other things that we do that are dysfunctional.

You know,

We're domesticated to,

To have a belief system.

So between the ages of four and eight is when we develop most of our belief systems.

We can do it at other times and sometimes they change to traumatic events before or after that and stuff like that.

But four to eight usually is when we're creating our belief systems.

Our belief systems are basically how we interact with the world.

So at some point we're creating a belief system for happiness because if you ask most people like what they want out of life,

Especially in this day and age,

You're kind of like,

You know,

I want to be happy.

What do you want for your kids?

I just want them to be happy.

Like we're starting to,

To really get the understanding that we're supposed to be happy.

You know,

This isn't the eighties where it's like,

What do you want out of life?

And it was just the age of excess.

And they're like,

I want everything,

You know,

We're veering away from that and we're stuck because enough people have gotten everything and they found out that there was no happiness there.

And having everything and no happiness is completely empty because what's the point?

I mean,

Oh,

So you know,

You're a billionaire and you have 32 houses and you fly all over the world and you can do whatever you want and people tell you whatever you want and you're miserable.

So,

You know,

When you're miserable,

It's,

What's the point of success?

I mean,

Why even bother having it?

You know,

So we're understanding that happiness is important,

Which is great,

But our learning curve right now is that we haven't slowed down enough to understand most of us what happiness is and we haven't spent time adjusting what our happiness meter is.

We go,

Oh,

I want to be happy.

Okay,

Cool.

What's that mean?

I just want to like stuff.

And like,

We don't slow down enough to really know what we mean by being happy and what happens with that since we don't do that,

Since most people don't do that,

We just revert back to our old belief systems.

Like,

Even if you know what you think you want for happiness,

There's still a good chance that your underlying belief system that you created between the ages of four and eight is still guiding your actions.

That's how strong these unconscious belief systems are.

They will override what our brain is saying.

This is why,

Like,

I tell my clients all the time,

It's like,

I'm not responsible for your growth.

You are.

So when my clients have successes and they go,

Oh,

Thank you,

Glenn.

I mean,

I get it.

You're welcome.

You know,

That's cool.

I appreciate the thank you and everything.

I'll take that.

But at the end of the day,

You did it.

You know,

When your life changes,

You did it.

I don't give a crap who your teacher is because it's implementation of that.

Because I can talk and explain to somebody how to have happiness and then they don't implement it or they try to implement it,

But they don't quite get it.

How many times most people that are on the spiritual path and listen to this type of stuff have been working on making themselves happier in their lives for years?

Most people and they haven't gotten there yet.

Why?

Well,

A lot of times it's because we're not successfully implementing what we hear.

Why?

Well,

A lot of times it's because our subconscious belief systems are stronger than our surface consciousness.

So we hear something that somebody says,

We go,

Oh,

Wow,

That's a really good way to look at life.

I want to implement that.

And then we try to start implementing it and maybe we even do in the beginning.

And then after a few weeks,

We revert right back to our old way of doing things.

And we wake up three months later and we go,

How the hell did I get here?

Like I thought I was changing my life a while ago and it seemed to be working for a little bit.

And then now I found myself right back in the same situation.

That's because our unconscious belief systems are very deep,

Deeply embedded.

And unless we consciously shift those and really put in the work to implement that new way of being and blast that old way of being out,

Then we're going to fall back into it.

So we really have to go in.

So instead of just understanding stuff on an intellectual level,

We have to go deeper.

We have to contemplate things.

Contemplating and feeling our body is a big part of really bringing spirituality into your life and changing,

Literally changing your vibration.

Because right now a lot of people are vibrating at the rate of somebody who is not clear on what their happiness is.

So unconsciously,

What have we been conditioned?

What have most people been conditioned to believe will bring them happiness?

Well,

Most people have been believed to believe that what society says we should do will bring us happiness.

I mean,

Otherwise why do it?

What's the point?

Society tells us a very specific way of what we should do.

And then like sometimes it says,

And this will make you happy.

And then sometimes it doesn't,

But it implies it by its silence.

But regardless,

If you want happiness,

Right?

If that's your end goal and society has a way of doing things,

Then by proxy you would just assume,

And also we've been specifically taught this,

But you would assume that you're doing these things that society tells you to do so you can get to happiness.

Right?

I mean,

That's the point of it all.

So it only makes sense.

The things society tells us to do have nothing to do with happiness.

Zero nada.

And we understand that on a conscious level,

But have we rewritten that on an unconscious level?

That's what's important.

That's what I want to talk about here today is rewriting it on a subconscious level,

An unconscious level,

Creating a new belief system that you live from and you need to bring consciousness in to do that.

So if you look at what society has taught you to do,

And they either told you it would bring you happiness or they implied it would bring you happiness,

But regardless it's what most people think they are supposed to do.

Most people think they're supposed to go to school,

Get good grades,

Get a college education,

Get a job,

And then branch off from there.

Most people,

If you want to think of what the American dream is,

That includes getting married,

Having kids,

Buying a house,

Having two cars in the driveway,

A dog named Spot and a white picket fence.

So you can see how like going to school,

Getting good grades,

Going to college,

Getting a job that's in alignment with that,

Which most people don't even get a job in their field of study from college,

But whatever.

That's a whole other podcast.

And then working and acquiring these things,

Most people would just assume that happiness lives in there somewhere.

Otherwise,

Why does your whole life plan get you to this end result of having a job,

Things,

And a family if having a job,

Things,

And a family doesn't bring you happiness?

So it's very much implied that those things are going to bring you happiness and they do not.

Getting married does not make you happy.

Look at the divorce rate.

You don't even have to look at the divorce rate.

It's just nothing external makes you happy.

Happiness comes in from within.

So how is having kids going to make you happy?

How is getting married going to make you happy?

How's buying a house going to make you happy?

It can give you momentary pleasures,

But after the momentary pleasure of buying a house,

You get the mortgage payment.

That's what takes up most people's consciousness.

They're not sitting there every day going,

Oh my God,

My existence on this planet is so heightened because I live in a home and how blessed am I to wake up in this every day?

That's all what consumes people's consciousness.

It's I have to go to a job that I don't like because I have this huge mortgage payment that I have to pay and I got to keep my kids in 32 activities.

Otherwise,

I'm not a good parent and my spouse is going to yell at me and there's happiness in there somewhere.

You know those,

And I'm not saying that those are bad things to have.

I mean,

I've had most of those things,

Maybe all of them.

It's not that those things are bad.

It's that they don't bring happiness.

Finding external brings happiness.

So our whole structure for life is flawed because we all want to be happy and we understand nowadays that happiness doesn't come from financial success.

So we kind of got that,

But yet most people are still living their lives and making decisions in alignment with what's going to give them financial success and not happiness.

This is why,

You know,

I think it's over 75% of Americans say that they're unhappy.

Well,

Because nobody's working towards it.

If you ask them,

They most likely will think they will.

Like,

What do you want out of life?

I just want to be happy.

You know,

That's a nice little meme nowadays.

So people are catching onto it,

Which is good because I mean,

Eventually they'll actually learn what that means and start doing it.

But for right now,

A lot of people just use it as a meme to sit,

You know,

Because it sounds nice and it makes us feel like a good person.

And other people probably think we're a good person if we just say,

I just want to be happy.

So it's socially acceptable right now to say,

I just want to be happy.

Nice thought.

How are you implementing that?

How are you bringing happiness into your life?

What are you doing to achieve the happiness that you desire?

I'm sorry.

What was the question?

That's the response you're going to get.

Like,

If you ask people what they want,

A lot of people are going to answer happiness because like I said,

Socially acceptable now and we are awakening as beings,

As human beings,

We are starting to awaken to the fact that we're spiritual beings and actually being happy is very important in our lives.

So we're starting to awaken to that.

We just haven't fully learned how to accomplish it yet.

We haven't replaced our hard wiring from when we're little to actually achieve it.

So when you say,

You know,

And people don't even,

A lot of people don't even slow down to contemplate it enough to do that.

So that's why if you ask a lot of people,

What would you like out of life?

A lot of people are going to say,

I just want to be happy.

But then you say,

Okay,

Well,

What are you doing to be happy?

Like,

What have you done to make happiness a part of your life?

And most people aren't going to know how to answer that question.

And that's the problem.

That's the disconnect.

So what we need to bring happiness into our lives is authenticity.

We need to go within.

We need to be still.

You know,

We need to be still within ourselves and contemplate these things and go,

What captures my attention?

What would be cool for me to do?

You know,

I always explain this.

It's like,

Every time I work with somebody,

I always look for people who are passionate about their jobs.

And the reason is,

Is because of what I'm talking about.

People who are passionate about their jobs love their jobs.

They're in alignment with their authenticity.

That's why that passion flows through.

Like,

I went to a dentist in the DR here and I was talking to him a little bit before and after.

And a friend had dropped me off.

So we're just sitting in the waiting room afterwards and we're talking and stuff.

And he was saying how he was like 62 years old and he had no designs on retirement because he absolutely loves what he does.

And he's like,

You know,

When we're in that room and I was working on your tooth,

I love that.

And the way he said it was like that.

He was like,

I love that.

Like he could barely contain the excitement and the joy that he gets to do this on a daily basis.

That's a dentist I want to go to because he's better.

He's better than other people.

He's better than somebody who would rather be doing something else.

Because he's fully in on what he's doing because he gets joy in it.

Everything is like that.

My chiropractor in Rhode Island.

When you ask somebody what they do for a living,

If they get so excited that they stutter before they can even answer you,

That you actually ask them what they do for a living.

That's somebody that you want to go to.

When you ask a acupuncturist,

You go,

So why did you choose acupuncture or what's cool about acupuncture?

If they go like,

Oh my God.

So the coolest thing,

Like if they,

If they stutter before they can even answer you,

That's a good sign.

That means they are passionate about what they do.

When you feel their joy coming up,

I was just listening.

No,

It's funny.

This is ironic.

This just dawned on me this second.

About 45 minutes ago,

I didn't know what I was going to do for a topic yet.

A friend of mine gave me some ideas and I was like,

Oh,

Okay.

But I didn't know and I hadn't looked at my list yet and I didn't know what I was going to do for a topic.

I took a shower and like the last song when I was coming out of a shower was a song.

It's just as new when I came across recently.

I mean,

It's new to me.

Something about,

I love my job,

So I'm on vacation every day.

If anybody knows the name of that song,

Just let me know.

I'm on,

I'm on vacay.

I love my job,

So every day I'm on vacay or something like that.

It's hilarious,

But it's awesome.

When you love what you do and how do you find,

How are you supposed to find out what you're supposed to be doing if you don't pay attention to what you love and what brings you joy?

You have to.

We have to connect to ourselves first and connect to our joy first and get to know ourselves first.

What are our likes?

What are our dislikes?

Go inside and practice that.

This is one of the ways I did this was somebody I was dating a long time ago.

We used to do go out to dinner.

That was something we'd like to do.

She'd always be like,

Oh,

What do you feel like?

I'm like,

I don't care,

Whatever you want.

I was being truthful.

I literally didn't know as much about food as she did.

She knew more than I did.

I liked having her choose because she always chose these really cool restaurants.

I would always find something to try that was much more enjoyable than anything I would come up with.

I liked the dynamic,

But after a while it was like she wanted to know what I wanted.

Why do you always go with,

You know,

Oh,

Whatever you want.

No,

Not whatever I want.

What do you want?

I started using that as an exercise to get in touch with myself.

Every meal I would sit there and before I decided what I was going to eat,

I would get real still and pay attention to my body and I'd be like,

Oh,

What do I feel like today?

And I realized I was completely disconnected from my own feelings.

So I would pay attention to my feelings.

I'd be like,

Oh,

Do I feel like Italian?

I don't know.

I didn't feel anything.

Do I feel like Indian?

No,

I like Indian food,

But I didn't feel like it.

Do I feel like pizza?

Well that's Italian.

Do I feel like an American cheeseburger?

Oh yeah.

You know,

Like I would just pay attention to how I felt and I use that and it's funny because that bled into other areas of our lives.

We're either in touch with ourselves or we're not.

So don't worry about what you're using as an exercise to get more in touch with yourself.

Just try to get in touch with yourself.

Most people as adults,

They don't even know what they like to do.

What do you like to do for fun?

Go out to eat.

What do I do for fun?

Watch movies.

You know,

Like,

No,

What do you,

You know,

What makes you feel alive that you're participating in your own life?

You know,

It's so we have to go within and connect to ourselves.

You know,

So,

And then my friend that was giving me an idea along these lines,

The way they phrased it was,

How to be the person you need to be to meet your own needs.

How should you,

How can you be the person that you need to be to meet your own needs?

You know,

And this is what breeds the healthy relationships too.

Like if we do our inside work and we find out how to meet our own needs and how to bring the happiness up to the surface from the inside,

Then we don't need somebody to fulfill us.

We don't need a relationship.

Then it's not based on a needy energy where one person is always chasing and the other one's always pulling away,

Which is a power dynamic in most relationships,

Right?

So if you can fulfill your own needs and you're good in your life and then you get into a relationship,

Then it's an expression of your joy.

That is the whole point.

This is what everything is supposed to be.

When we learn how to be authentic with our own selves and we do what brings us joy,

We're going to be much better at whatever we do for work or,

You know,

Whatever we do to bring us joy,

We're going to be enthusiastic and we're going to want to do it.

So,

You know,

That's going to be joyful.

So then when we get into a relationship or when we buy a house or when we have kids or when we get a new car or go on a cool vacation,

Whatever we do,

Whatever we purchase,

Whatever we express ourselves as,

It's an expression of the joy within us instead of something that we think unconsciously is going to give us the joy or the happiness.

External cannot give us happiness.

It can be an expression of our happiness.

It can be like,

Oh,

I'm happy inside and no,

It's cool.

I get to get myself a new car.

That's fun.

Whoa,

You buy a new car,

But you don't think that the new car is going to make you happy.

You're already happy.

And that's just an expression of your happiness.

That's the layout we have to follow.

You know,

We think we have to get all this stuff and then we're going to be happy and that's backwards.

First we're happy and then we can use all this stuff to express our happiness or we can just sit there and be happy.

We don't have to necessarily express it in an external way at all.

We can just be it.

You know,

So being authentic to yourself is being able to fulfill your own needs.

And once you're able to fulfill your own needs,

Then you're free to have that relationship or not have a relationship.

It doesn't really matter.

You need some that there's no attachment to the outcome.

You're not trying to get something from somebody else because you're already full.

That's when you have a lot of healthy stuff to share when you're full and then you can give from the overflow and you never run out.

So that's the stuff.

I got to look at these comments.

Yeah,

So be who you need to be,

Which is your authentic self first.

So Sarah,

Sarah got that song for me.

The song is by Dirty Heads called Vacation.

Yes.

Check that song out.

It's a cool tune.

Listen to the words.

Let's see what else.

Yeah.

I have a dear friend who is miserable in her job but swear she has to stay there because of her financial obligations.

Yeah.

I mean,

You know,

Like that's the formula that we created and then you live by it.

And what an existence,

Man.

You know,

Like,

I mean,

We work a lot of years.

Nowadays we work 40,

50,

60 years.

We work that many years and we're there eight hours a day a lot of times.

Oh my God.

That's a majority,

Literally a majority of our lives.

It's more of our lives than most things,

Including family a lot of times.

And you're miserable at it.

But you have to do it to keep the financial obligations.

You have to,

Right?

No,

You don't.

Like we're living backwards.

It's,

You know,

One of my favorite sayings that I came across fairly recently was,

Was Jesus said that man,

The Sabbath is for man.

Man isn't for the Sabbath.

And what he meant by that is that like,

You know,

Church or the Sabbath,

The special day is made for man's benefit.

Man shouldn't be living for the Sabbath.

That's backwards.

And it's the same thing with life.

We're not supposed to be living for material things.

Now I bet you your friend,

If you said that's miserable,

But swear she has to stay at her job that she hates because of financial obligations.

If you go to her and you say,

Does money bring you happiness?

She'll probably say no,

Because most people understand that money doesn't buy you happiness.

Then why are you putting your financial obligations above everything above your own happiness?

Like when I was,

When I needed an adjustment with my energy up here in the DR,

I sat down and I was like,

Get right back to basics.

Everything is above my happiness.

If I have to allow my business to completely fail for me to be at peace,

Then I will drop this business tomorrow.

If that was what I needed to do for me to be at peace within,

I will sell coconuts on the side of the road.

I will be homeless.

I don't give a crap.

Now,

Of course,

Once you commit to your happiness on that level,

The universe or God or whatever you believe in backs and supports you.

And of course you don't have to become homeless.

How would the universe,

How would God be happy with you being less than what you're supposed to be?

How would the universe expand with you being less than you need to be?

It wouldn't.

So of course I don't have to flush my business down the toilet.

Why would a loving God even ask me to do that?

It doesn't make any sense.

But the point is I need to be willing to,

I need to commit to my own peace and happiness first.

That has to be primary importance and then everything else can fall into place.

And if we have our priorities like that,

Then we're going to do fine.

So you don't have to stay there.

Sell your house.

Sell your car.

There's many things that we can do to actually get a job that we enjoy more.

We can change our lifestyles instead of staying in,

Literally staying in a lifestyle that we hate.

You know how many people do that?

We literally live for 30,

40,

50 years hating our existence because we're not willing to change because we're so conditioned by society's rules that tell us that we have to have certain things in order to be happy.

And then we're not even happy and we say,

Well,

I can't let go of these things.

Why?

You're not happy.

So why not let go of them?

They're obviously not bringing you happiness.

Let's see.

Nicole,

I 100% agree with you.

I love my job.

I get to work with kids all day.

I'm not a teacher,

But I describe my work at my Disney.

Yeah.

So,

You know,

This is it.

Like when you feel like you're at Disneyland because you get to play with kids all day.

That is a building block for a successful life.

Because at the end of the day,

You're not going to sit there and go,

Thank God I worked all those years at that job that I hated and was miserable the whole time.

Thank God I did that because then everybody could look at me and point their finger at me and say,

Well,

She's responsible.

Who gives a crap?

But I can see somebody laying on their death bed going,

Oh my God,

I can't believe that I get to do what brings me the most joy for 40 years or for 20 years or whatever.

What a gift that was.

Let's see what Lisa says.

I think it's important to learn to trust yourself.

Listen and trust your intuitions and life is fun every day.

At least for me it is.

Absolutely.

You know,

And that's really a good summation of what I've been talking about.

It's authenticity,

Getting to know yourself,

Getting to trust yourself,

Listening and trusting your intuitions,

Like what your inside is telling you.

And we get to that by contemplating things,

By sitting in the stillness and paying attention to how we feel when we think about different things.

When we're looking for like what type of job we should have or,

Excuse me,

If you're miserable at your job,

Stop looking into different areas that you might want to do and make it a game.

Lighthearted,

You know,

Like Lisa said,

Is fun and life is fun.

Learn to trust,

Listen and trust your intuitions and life is fun.

This is how life is supposed to be.

When you intellectualize things to death,

Is that fun?

Well,

Geez,

I'm not sure what I should do.

If I go into this career,

Then,

You know,

The pay is good,

But there's not much vacation.

I'm not sure how much I'm going to have that and I'm going to be kind of away from my family.

And then over here,

This,

I get a little bit more freedom,

But does that feel fun to you going through that intellectual process?

It doesn't feel like fun to me.

You know,

That's not our guidance system.

Our brain has a purpose and we can use it for things,

But to find what we're supposed to be doing,

That's not a brain job.

That's a body job.

That's an intuition job.

That's a get to know yourself and what brings you joy job.

You know,

So don't over intellectualize it.

I mean,

We can use our brain little pieces here and there along the way to make intelligent decisions.

There's nothing wrong with our brain.

It's a gift too,

But like it can't be our end all be all.

So loosen our grip and play around with things.

Make it a game because that's when you're going to pay attention to what enthusiasm is.

If you're going like,

What should I do?

And real intellectual thinking,

Geez,

What should I do?

What can I,

Where do you feel the energy when I talk like that?

What should I do?

I have to figure out what I do.

It's constricting.

You're trying real hard and in your body,

Your muscles tighten and you constrict.

There's no flow.

There's no life force energy flowing through this.

There's no freedom in you.

Relax,

Man.

Lighten up,

Relax and be like,

Make a game out of it.

You know,

Oh,

What?

Today's game is a scavenger hunt for what brings me joy.

You know,

You don't have to be so serious.

Like,

Oh,

I have to figure out what I'm going to do for the rest of my life and it has to be fun.

That's not,

That's not even fun saying that sentence.

Like I'm going to play around with some ideas and I'm just going to pay attention to what gets me excited and what really makes me feel alive.

Now that sounds like fun.

So do that.

You know?

Well,

I think that's it.

Boy,

That we,

Uh,

We went over.

I'm trying to keep these short,

But it just ain't happening.

What can you do?

Um,

So yeah,

I'm going to wrap up there.

So it's authenticity.

Be true to yourself.

That's what success looks like.

You know,

It's the basis for everything.

It's the basis for internal happiness is finding what is right for you,

Finding what your needs are and how to meet them and what brings you joy and,

And,

And what your authentic gift to this world is.

And don't pay attention to like,

If,

If you think it's important enough,

It's all important.

Everybody needs to be doing something.

You know,

My son's doing plumbing right now.

I couldn't be happier.

We need plumbers.

So if that's what's bringing him joy,

Good.

Do that.

If you get joy from digging ditches,

Do that.

You get joy from working with kids.

Do that.

I couldn't work with kids.

I mean,

I'd love to be in a father,

But there's no way I could be working with kids on a daily basis.

No,

But yet somebody else describes it as I love my job and all caps,

Nicole is saying,

And is excited to say it's like Disneyland.

You know,

Like,

I mean,

That's,

I would not describe it like that.

That's why I shouldn't be doing it.

That's why Nicole should be doing it.

So go within,

Connect to your authentic self and,

Um,

And bring your authenticity out into your own world as much as you can.

And don't worry about the external man.

Don't worry about the relationship.

Don't worry about the job.

Don't worry about all that stuff.

If you really spend your time being authentic and connecting with yourself and then expressing that as much as possible,

The right relationship will come the right,

You'll find the right jobs.

Everything starts falling into place because God and or the universe or whatever you believe in wants you to do this.

So once you do it,

It supports you in it.

It wants you to continue living like this.

So whatever you need to live a productive life will be presented to you and you'll be grateful and then more things to be grateful for will come.

That's how it works.

That's the system,

Not what they taught us.

All right people,

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you and thank you for your input.

It really helped and I will talk with you guys all soon.

Peace.