Can We Ever Know How Much We Don't Know?

It's another big sad saying.

Because there's something like it's like an elephant in the room and it has to be addressed you guys.

So once upon a time,

There was a spiritual seeker who had a lot of garbage.

She set out in the journey.

Now she was a very sincere soul.

So although she had a lot of garbage and progress was slow,

She did make she did come into a big,

Big,

Understanding.

And she made her home at this top of this mountain where it was very beautiful and clear,

Simple,

Illuminated,

Simpler than a child even infinitely peaceful clear.

And with all her heart,

She wanted to help others with all her heart because she had had such a difficult time and knew sort of almost every crevice and hole and tripping point and on this mountain because she had fallen so many times climbing,

But she'd always picked herself up and begun again.

I'm using my phone.

I'm using my phone because my internet's gone on.

So I can't see any of you.

But um,

So she was speaking to a number of people who were in this fog.

Now,

The biggest problem that they had in hearing her and hearing what they were saying was a number of them were going,

Well,

That can't be true.

Because their experience was the fog.

And some of them were even hadn't even started climbing the mountain yet.

They were circulating in the fog,

Not even able to see the path that starts leading up the mountain.

But they were quite sure about their experience.

I mean,

Their experience was that what was being said didn't make sense.

So of course,

They dismissed it.

And they just kept walking around in the fog.

Just because they were dismissing it.

They weren't listening with their hearts.

They weren't going,

Well,

This doesn't make sense to me right now.

But maybe I don't know much.

Maybe I have a lot to learn.

Some of them did this.

Some of them did this,

They could hear the love in her words,

Even though the content didn't make sense to their minds to their egos.

But you know,

A lot of them thought the egos,

They were in their egos,

They were actually locked in their egos,

But they actually believed that they were,

You know,

Hearing their soul energy.

And that they were aligned with their soul.

I mean,

That the extent of how deluded they are,

They were.

So those ones couldn't really find the pathway up the mountain,

They couldn't get the even to find where the pathway begun to go up the mountain.

So the person,

The teacher knew all this.

And she just kept speaking and loving them.

And she waited.

She waited till they noticed that maybe they hadn't even found the initial gate yet.

To even start to go higher in the mountain to go higher in a vibration.

To actually have any idea what compassion and unconditional love really is.

Because some of them were like,

Walking around in the fog,

And it was like there was a club of people in the fog.

And they were really interested in actually just being in the club,

Rather than hearing what the teacher was saying.

So because that was their true interest to be in the club,

That's what they got then.

And some of them got discouraged about really whether the spiritual journey was really real,

Because they were,

Like I said,

They were in the fog.

The experience was that nothing really changed,

You know,

Life still didn't make sense.

It wasn't very fulfilling.

Yeah,

So it's so interesting,

Isn't it this bumbling,

This start,

Because it's really,

Really,

Really important about this story.

It's the only thing that is going to work for the people attending the satsang is if you listen with an open heart.

A lot of what Abraham said did not make sense to me.

But you know,

Not once did I think to myself,

Well,

That's just crazy,

Or that's wrong,

Or that couldn't be.

Everything he said,

I listened,

And I kind of made space for it.

Even if I didn't understand it,

I just made space.

It was like,

I thought to myself,

I mean,

I knew this man knew more than I did.

And I hope that I would grow into a bigger understanding.

So I rejected nothing of what he said.

I didn't.

Sometimes I just didn't do anything with it.

Intellectually,

Because I didn't get it.

But just sitting there listening to the way he would speak.

It kind of strengthened and softened me both.

Yeah,

Strengthened and softened me physically.

Because I was listening with my heart.

So I was allowing these seeds to be planted,

Basically,

That maybe it might take me 10 years to understand.

Can I add something?

Okay,

Keep it short,

Like to the point.

Yes.

Okay,

So recently,

I have been learning is actually a really great answer for everything.

And you can learn so much more when you just say,

I don't know,

Because there might just be that little tidbit that you just didn't know,

Out of everything that you did know that someone might have said.

So I've noticed that when I keep my mouth shut,

I actually learned something.

Pretty much.

Yeah.

And you'll know if you're in a situation where you have to speak up in support of your own soul,

But most of the time,

You know,

We can perceive,

Receive being receptive.

You know,

In the Old Testament,

They talk about the tower of Babel,

And all the voices are talking and nobody's listening.

It is really important to understand how to have belief in yourself and self confidence,

And yet be humble.

Because I'll tell you,

Last week,

With when I'm talking about how the ego is monstrous,

And I'm like,

Amma has said this,

It's it's woven into all the books by the Brahmacharis.

It is not new spiritual data.

It is just the truth of things.

And the response,

I was just gobsmacked.

I thought,

What are we doing here,

If that is hard to hear?

Because if you look out in the outside world that is on the verge of economic devastation and third world war,

Does that not look pretty monstrous?

Is that not created by our own selves as a metaphor for what we're doing inside?

So it is inarguable.

It's staring you in the face.

It's whether you want to experience economic devastation and World War Three on the outside,

Or whether you want to work with yourself on the inside,

So that you have control.

And you have control of other events through the inside.

And you make the world a better place.

All I want you to do is listen.

You don't have to agree with me.

And if it's scary,

If it's scary,

Notice that it's scary.

Just observe this.

Just observe it.

Observe your discomfort.

So I thought to myself after this,

Where I could feel this big merry-go-round of where people had jumped in their heads,

Grabbed what I was saying with their head,

Going round in a merry-go-round.

And I thought to myself,

What are we doing with the satsangs,

You know?

And even people who would think of themselves as spiritual,

And maybe even seasoned spiritual journeyers jumped into their head when I was talking about how our egos are monstrous.

And it's like,

Okay.

And I thought to myself,

Well,

You haven't had much experience with dealing with your own ego,

Really.

If that's scary,

Because it's just the way it is.

You know,

There's an associate of Freud,

Melanie Klein,

And she termed the word Kleinian monster,

Which is,

She used it to describe what pre-verbal trauma feels like,

To give a picture to it,

To the baby,

Who's wide open with universal energy,

Beingness,

And he's in a family situation where the parents are,

You know,

Alienated from their true selves.

And,

You know,

Some babies are in very difficult situations.

And there's no words.

So there's no words that they can hear,

And or that are that the baby can speak.

So there's,

There's no,

There's kind of no way into the experience,

There's just the experience of maybe total fear,

Or anger,

Even whatever it is.

Supposing that the parents angry,

With the baby's been crying all night,

And the parents angry,

And is,

You know,

Expresses anger to the baby.

For the baby,

It's just like a big monster.

Okay,

This is what our egos form on this kind of stuff,

You guys.

This is why egos have such trouble experiencing God,

Because for them,

It was the opposite.

And this is exactly why people have doubts on the journey,

Until they,

You know,

Until the ego completely dissolves,

Basically.

At which point the person goes,

Oh,

It's all a big joke.

It's a dream.

Hey,

You guys,

You're okay.

And then they speak and then the people with the egos are going like,

Well,

That can't be true.

That's not true.

I know what my experience is like,

And I know what's right.

And it's like,

Okay.

It's just how open you are,

How much space you can give yourself,

How much space you can give your own experience,

And what the teacher's teaching,

And just put it all in a big cauldron in your heart.

And keep talking to Amma,

Keep talking to God.

And what will happen is,

It will all start getting distilled,

And you will start experiencing truth.

You know,

There's several things that can be done in a situation like this,

You know,

A teacher can start having level one,

Two,

Three,

Four sad sayings,

Right?

I don't like the idea.

And the other thing that will happen is if somebody really doesn't want to get it,

They'll stop coming.

They just won't want to come.

They'll just go and no,

Not this week.

No,

No.

And the ones who really want to come,

Even if they don't fully get it,

Will just keep coming.

So that their cells of their bodies can be bathed in it.

Because that will help weaken the ego and dislodge the ego.

But some of you,

It's sort of like,

You know,

You want to keep driving in the ego.

And you want to put me in the in the passenger seat,

Keeping you company along the way,

And speaking to you endlessly about your ego and and the your difficulties and where you're having trouble.

And it's like,

I don't think so.

Teachers will tend to really teachers,

Traditionally will say something once.

Now,

This one,

I think probably airs too much on patience,

Because just because I know what it's like.

But,

You know,

To grow,

You have to have your will wanting the growth,

You have to have your will to be willing to take the next step,

Even if it's uncomfortable.

You know,

I was speaking to a lovely woman recently,

And this is what we're like.

So we were going round and round a bit,

And I suddenly had the picture of she was sitting in a car that was in park.

You know,

So I said,

You got to put your car in drive,

You got to put it in drive before you can move forward.

Okay,

Now I understand how difficult this is.

You go like,

Okay,

Well,

How do I put my car in drive?

We're talking about an imaginary car here.

Well,

Let's say metaphorical,

Not imaginary.

I don't know how to do that.

And,

You know,

By the end of the talk,

She had basically put her car in drive,

Or she was willing to contemplate doing it.

And it's just taking a deeper level of responsibility.

It's like,

I've often had the feeling of being in a car that I did not know how to drive.

I didn't even know how to turn it on.

I didn't even know how to access the power of it,

Or the movement.

So basically,

I just stayed there on the journey,

Aware of where I was,

And kind of just playing with it,

Like imagining that I was turning on the car,

Or just being aware that I did not know how to take my power,

And I was open to learn.

Right?

It's very,

Very subtle stuff.

But the journey is very subtle.

Like spiritual progress is,

As you become increasingly subtle in your perceptions.

You know,

For some of you,

You think spiritual progress is when your ego gets its goals.

But,

You know,

Sometimes we don't get our goals,

And it's a good thing.

And sometimes that's when we make the most progress.

If you understand that we're hypnotized by the outer world,

We're hypnotized into an outer focus,

And it takes time and some degree of pain to learn how to come inside,

To learn to focus inside,

To have at least one eye on the inside.

Even as you're dealing with your outside reality that isn't outside,

It just looks it.

It's all coming from the inside.

Right?

But we get hypnotized by the outer,

And we think it's real,

And we think that our power is in the outer realm.

Okay,

So this is why Alma talks about how when you drop a pin,

Okay,

So you drop a pin inside your dark hut,

But you start looking for it outside because it looks like there's light there.

Do you see what I mean?

It's lit.

You start looking for it there,

But the pin is in the dark hut.

It's like the answers to your problems are not in the outside world.

They're in the dark hut inside your heart that doesn't have the light yet,

And when you go inside,

You will find the pin,

And that gives you the key to the outside world,

To how to handle it.

See,

The journey,

What happens is you open up to your hearts,

To the knowledge that's in your hearts,

And you will gradually become illuminated,

And as you open to your hearts,

You will gradually become clearer and clearer when you're stuck in your head.

You'll go,

Okay,

I know I'm stuck in my head,

And that will give you a way out of your head,

But if you're just going along with the storyline of your stuck head,

How many lifetimes will it take?

I don't know.

A lot of you just listen to the thoughts of your stuck heads without even realizing that it's your heads.

You know,

Teachers will be the truth.

Gandhi said truth is hard as adamant or soft as a blossom.

Both a teacher and the universe and life can go,

It can be hard as adamant or soft as a blossom.

For the person at the top of the mountain,

It is soft as a blossom.

For a person resisting truth,

When the soul,

When that person,

Okay,

When that person has asked for truth and that person is resisting truth,

The universe will get hard as adamant,

Get hard as a diamond.

You can't ask,

You know,

When the universe is being hard as a diamond and the teacher is being hard as a diamond because of the degree of resistance,

You can't say,

Oh,

Please be softer.

You have to go,

The only way it will work is if you go,

I am willing to learn this lesson,

Please show me.

I am willing to learn this lesson,

Please show me.

It's if there's a shift into the heart of,

Okay,

I'm willing,

I'm willing,

I'll get it.

I'm willing to get it,

Please,

Mercy.

And then what will happen is,

It may seem that the universe or the teacher is still being hard,

But it will gradually change and life will get softer with you and the teacher will get softer with you.

And the bottom line is,

How much do you want to get out of your ego,

You know?

Because the more you want it,

The more you want truth,

The more discomfort you'll pick up,

You'll put up with for that.

You'll do anything for it,

Basically.

And if you,

If you know,

You,

It's limited,

Supposing you're,

You're open to like 30%,

Then that's the level of illumination,

You'll get 30%.

And there's no,

You know,

We all have lives where we're,

We're seekers,

And we're not really sincere.

And we have lives where we're sincere.

And we,

You know,

Hopefully have a life where we get it and we get to complete.

And personally,

I feel that even if we resist every single lifetime,

There'll be one final lifetime where we were about as perfect as you can get,

Sort of like a wise woman or wise man who's learned a lot from life,

And they reached the point of they're not doing any harm at all.

And they might not even believe in God,

But they're not doing any harm at all.

And then my feeling is somebody like that,

Even if they stay to all their lifetimes,

They move into self realization in the dying process,

Where they become very conscious.

And even if this is done in an unconscious way,

When they're in a coma,

The thing is that,

And I remember Alma talking about this a bit,

That there are some people who refuse to learn no matter how bad it got in outer reality.

And it,

You know,

Broke her heart.

And also it was like,

What a waste.

Sometimes,

You know,

We have to see how bad it is in a way,

Like how much darkness we're in,

How little we trust,

How hopeless we might feel,

We might have to see this,

And just embrace that,

And just be with it,

In order to be brought out of it.

I mean,

Sometimes,

As long as we're trying to help ourselves,

Like trying everything,

Nothing seems to change.

But sometimes when we just go,

Well,

Like,

Here I am,

I'm this hopeless mess.

I don't know if I'm ever gonna make any progress.

And we just live like that for a while,

Like a shadow.

And then we just live like that for a while,

Like a ship that's be calmed on the,

On the sea that can't move forward,

Because there's no wind.

We just be with that.

And then we get brought out of it.

Yeah.

You know,

We don't do our journey,

Something beyond us,

Does it?

See,

All of you,

All of us,

We have a witness.

And that's our soul energy,

Okay,

Is witnessing these dream figure here.

Okay,

So when we can witness ourselves,

And we say witness ourselves,

Doing something yet again.

But without say,

You know,

Say,

For example,

I might go like,

You know,

I might have witnessed myself feeling very tense and witness an uncomfortable exchange with somebody,

Just because my heart was closed.

And I wasn't feeling good about myself at that point.

And then my,

I would witnesses and without judgment,

Just kind of noticing,

Oh,

I'm doing this again.

Then what happens is that your witnessing is your tapping into your soul energy,

Do you understand this,

The ability to be a neutral witness is your soul.

And when you do that,

It starts dissolving the ego that made you tense.

And had that caused you to have this uncomfortable exchange with this person.

It is the process of letting light in,

Even though in the moment,

You just go,

Oh,

Here I am,

Again,

I'm doing it again.

So it doesn't feel like your ego is being dissolved.

But it is exactly that action that will dissolve your ego.

And some of you are arguing with what this one speaks rather than getting on to learning how to be a witness.

And some of the arguing with what this one speaks,

Because it gives you an illusory illusion of control,

And there isn't any.

And you just shooting yourself in the foot.

If you think of it,

If you come in,

Want to spend time with somebody,

It's like,

If you if you don't think they're speaking from knowledge,

Then why would you come?

So sort of like,

Well,

If you come,

Then just open your heart,

You don't have to agree with everything.

But just open your heart to the information,

And to the energy with which this one speaks.

It's like when you get the love and compassion that's coming through the words,

It will just accelerate you.

Anna,

Can you speak about the shift that you recently made?

Yeah,

Okay.

All you said up to now,

In the satsang is just so resonating with,

With me and how I felt,

How I was acting out of my ego beliefs.

And how I was like,

Ambivalent about to this desire to be with you and to,

To follow your guidance.

And on the other hand,

Not to believe what you said.

And in the last couple of weeks,

I could,

I don't know how it happened.

But I could see how I shoot myself in the foot by talking to myself from the ego,

Like,

Judging me and being very hard to myself and everything.

And,

And I could,

I could feel how I projected this on you.

Like,

You were hard to me.

But I could feel somehow,

This is how I am talking to myself all day long.

And then in my journal,

I made a list of all the sentences.

I could make out I'm,

All the things I told myself.

And it's a very,

Very long list.

And so,

But I was in this state,

I still am a lot of time,

Where a lot of fear comes up when I witness this,

I can witness it.

But then there is this fear,

How,

And confusion coming up again.

And then I remember the thing you said to me,

And you said it in the satsang too.

Then I go into this soft,

Soft,

Neutral,

Gentle room inside of me.

And this gives me a little bit of peace and safety.

So,

I don't know if I made any sense.

No,

That makes sense.

The soft,

Gentle room inside of you is you that's an intellectual construct.

So it's not the true softness,

Right?

I mean,

What you're doing is it's just like a scary little kid trying to write through themselves.

You see,

What I'm pointing to in all of you guys is the truth within you is this loving,

Soft,

Safe place.

And this is what your egos are scared of.

So sometimes you just have to observe your fear.

Okay,

Just observe it.

It's like,

Okay,

There's fear.

And then take an action like,

Pray,

You know,

Please help me with this fear.

So Anna,

I'd say like,

Take it to Amma,

Ask her to show you your true safety.

Okay?

Yeah.

Do you understand?

Yes,

I understand.

And yeah,

I could feel this about the safety.

It feels so safe to listen to the old beliefs somehow.

I don't know why.

It's completely nonsense.

But it's,

I really pray to feel the safety of my true self.

Yeah,

It's sort of like,

Just get back to,

You know,

Like,

Again,

You're getting in there.

And you're kind of buying into your ego content.

It's like,

What do you really want?

It's your,

You know,

You just get down to it.

What do you want?

I mean,

If you really want truth,

You'll,

You won't pay so much attention to all of this.

Do you see what I mean?

You'll just observe.

Yeah,

I am.

I'm really hard on myself.

And I'm,

You know,

I'm,

You'll,

You'll kind of do everything to help yourself.

Right?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's the hardest.

This is right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So there's part of you that just works with intellectual constructs.

So which is okay.

And it's just a place on the journey.

It's okay.

Yeah.

Yeah,

I see.

It's a Yeah,

It's not bad.

Please.

It's just,

Just be with the light being shown.

Is this you're working with another level of your ego in a way,

Trying to figure it out.

When it's simpler than this is sort of like,

You know what it comes down to you look at the teacher and you decide whether you want to be a person like that or not.

Really,

Right?

If you want to be a person like that,

Well,

Then you'll put some energy towards getting what this person is saying.

And if you don't want to be a person like that,

You won't engage.

You won't engage the same way at all.

And you'll have some trick in the ego going,

Well,

I can never be like that.

Yeah.

Right.

But that just like,

You know,

It kind of like just watch that it's like,

You guys.

Okay.

Your hearts are bigger than your minds.

You're it's like you're,

You can block the moon out with your fingertip.

So you can hold it up in the sky so you cannot see the moon.

It is just a fingertip.

It's your own fingertip that is stopping you from seeing the glory of who you really are.

There's nothing I can do if you want to do that.

You know,

I can keep shining a light and going,

Well,

Not quite yet.

Not quite yet.

But with great love in my heart.

But this is why the stories of the,

The students,

Anna,

It's exactly like the students are after the teacher told the students to build a building.

And then the teacher goes,

No,

It,

That's not it.

And tells the teach the student to deconstruct it and try again.

Then they,

The student tries again,

The teacher goes,

No.

And finally,

It was like after 70 times,

There was one student left.

And they built this,

This hat with perfect presence.

They actually were so in truth and in the flow that they didn't even care what their teacher said about it.

You know,

It wasn't a rebellion against the teacher.

It was just like they were so in truth and flow is like,

Whatever.

And of course,

The teacher rubbish stamp that this is what the journey's like.

And sometimes you have to walk around with your buildings fallen down,

And you don't know what to do.

And you just have to like,

Pick up the pieces of your understanding and start again.

And the thing about a satsang is it can provide a safety while that happens.

And you can do it all,

It's all going to be done at a pace that you can handle.

And all of you are on different levels.

So,

Some of this is just maybe not going to make much sense.

But it's okay,

You'll find that if you just keep coming that your life opens up.

Like if you keep coming with sincerity,

And with sincerity,

And being open,

And listening with heart,

You will find that your mind becomes more porous,

Your intellect becomes more porous,

Your heart gets bigger,

You understand yourself,

You understand other people,

And you just gradually become more in truth.

You see,

Everybody in the world is scared today.

You know,

Most people,

They're scared about outside events,

Maybe scared of inside events,

Maybe scared of both.

It's we're being brought through this big leap into a higher consciousness.

And we're,

We're going to do it,

The universe is taking us through it.

So,

If you go,

Okay,

The whole world is making this leap,

Or the whole world has this opportunity to make this leap.

I want to make this leap into a higher consciousness,

Then you will do that.

It will happen that way for you.

That's the whole point of the satsangs,

To give you enough support and security that you can,

You know,

Navigate your lives in this world,

And wake up at a pace that you can handle.

And I just got a very strong guidance coming through me to really throw down the gauntlet and call you guys on how you are using your minds,

Your intellects with receiving this knowledge.

And what I'm wanting is for you to like step back from your head,

Realize the teacher is going to speak and say things that you don't get.

But maybe if you just make space in your heart,

And keep coming,

You will understand in time.

That's it.

That's it.

Good.

It's sort of like,

I feel like I've called your bluff.

And it's like,

What you do with it.

I know that you're totally safe,

Whatever is happening for you,

You are totally safe,

You are being brought through lessons that from before birth,

Your soul had decided to learn,

And you're the agent of your soul,

You're your vehicle.

Something with absolute infinite wisdom is accompanying you through your journey.

And it will bring you into difficulty,

And it will bring you out of difficulty.

And Anna,

Your vulnerability is you just don't realize that your soul is doing everything.

Yeah.

You know,

What happens is,

As you move into your true energy,

You,

You,

You,

In a way you leave your karma behind,

Because your karma only operates on your mind body complex.

So as you allow your perceptual understanding to grow,

You can walk through your karma without,

Without a twinge.

Because it's happening to the mind body complex that you think is you.

Now I understand this is far beyond most people's capacity to understand,

But I'm just telling you,

Just,

Just telling you,

Just,

Just to hear it,

Just to hear it,

Because hearing it will help you move beyond your heads,

Even a little bit.

Yeah.

Okay.

I think some of you are tired,

But so I'm going to keep being available for questions.

If there are any questions or comments.

I Oh,

Go first.

Thank you.

Can you just repeat your last few sentences about the mind body complex.

Okay,

Your karma happens to your mind body complex.

It's what you've earned over your lifetimes.

You can learn how to play in your soul energy.

As you rise,

Climb the mountain.

You are climbing into a union with your soul energy so you can walk through any karma with kind of a peacefulness,

A kind of like me.

This is just really happening to this complex.

It's not really me.

Okay.

Yeah.

Thank you for the visualisation part of it as well it really helps.

Okay,

But again,

Like you guys,

That will come organically,

And don't try to make that state with your intellects don't try to create that state,

It will just happen organically through you feeling the great sorrow of being separate from the creator over and over and over,

And through you seeing the great sorrow of how your fear distorts your perceptions.

Okay,

When you really see how fear just distorts your life,

And you feel great sorrow at it.

You will heal into this bigger understanding and you heal beyond fear.

And most of us we stay busy in our heads,

Rather than getting down to actually feeling the sorrow of all this.

Thank you.

Right.

I read somewhere that in the future.

People would write books that catalyze people into feeling because we were going to be so numb with this way of our heads and everything that will be so desperate to feel.

That will be reading books that make us feel.

This makes sense to me that it could be like that.

Did somebody else have a comment?

Yeah.

Yes,

Can you hear me Prima Suda?

Yes.

Oh,

Hi.

First of all,

Hi,

I want to apologize.

I ghosted you on our appointment day and it was an interesting day because no but everything I wanted to talk to you about kind of resolved itself in that day.

That's what I want to say.

I don't need to say details.

But also I wanted to say that I've been very upset lately and that's why I haven't been coming to the SAT sayings and hearing a lot of people speak about their anger with you,

But also with themselves and projecting and all that good stuff,

All the big words that people use to,

You know,

Justify responsibility and all that stuff.

I'm just saying that I feel like I'm taking more responsibility for my actions now and trying to place blame where it's supposed to go properly so that I can manage myself a little bit better.

Stop.

What's up?

You know,

If you have a conversation set up with a teacher and you don't turn up and you don't contact them after that is just the height of kind of disrespect.

Yeah,

I get that.

No,

Stop,

Please.

It shows a level of disrespect for yourself primarily.

And the fact that you would treat a teacher like this is kind of like there's not that much the teacher can do then.

The teacher will kind of like be very,

Very cautious and not want to put themselves in a situation like that again,

Because Yeah,

I get that.

Okay,

So that's good.

Can I say something for one second?

Okay,

For like quick.

Yeah,

For sure.

I feel like with all due respect,

Primasutha,

You have a lot of arrogance,

And I don't appreciate being talked to the way that you talk to me as if I'm not 42 years old.

I'm not a child,

Ma'am.

I retired after 20 years in the Coast Guard,

And I deserve a little bit more respect than what you're giving me.

Every single time we've had a conversation about anything,

You give me attitude as if I deserve it.

You were the one who told me in the very beginning when we talked live on our very first set saying that I was 99% sensitive.

You do not bear that in mind when you speak to me,

And I don't appreciate it.

And you know what?

Over the last couple weeks when the eclipses have happened,

I've been learning how to stand in my own power and on my own two feet.

And this is probably what this has been leading me up to,

Which is that you are not my teacher,

And I appreciate your time,

But I will be leaving.

Thank you.

Okay.

Blessings.

Blessings.

Blessings to you,

Sweetie.

Okay,

Well,

There we go.

Does anybody else have any comments,

Any questions?

Okay.

Laura?

Wow,

That was really unsettling.

Thank you,

Pramasutha.

Pramasutha,

I don't feel safe where I'm living,

And I'm contemplating a move,

And I feel like everything's falling into place and not being led.

My mind is not working,

And so it's hard for me to wrap my head around things.

I don't know what to do.

So I am open when I listen to the satsangs when they come.

I always listen more than once.

I haven't asked Amma yet.

I email Swami a question for Amma every time I'm thinking of the big change.

That's all.

You know,

Laura,

One of the things you could do is,

You know,

Write a letter to Amma,

You know,

Sometimes putting our thoughts on paper,

And then mailing it,

And then,

You know,

Having that be your giving over.

Mail it to who?

To Amma.

You can look and get her address,

And she reads these letters.

She reads every letter.

Yeah,

You know,

It's just a way,

And for all of you,

It's a way for you to open up to the experience that you're not alone.

By taking an action like that,

Writing to Amma.

We have to keep stepping forward.

Thank you.

I'll do that.

And,

You know,

Laura,

You know,

We know that you have this brain thing going on,

Right?

So it interrupts your thoughts.

So,

You know,

Understand that there's enormous angelic focus on you with great,

Great compassion.

You know,

Obviously,

Amma is with you all the time.

That,

I do know,

Premotsu.

Yeah.

Yeah.

In my heart,

I know that.

But,

You know,

This is.

.

.

But beyond that,

I don't know anything.

No,

This is it.

You know,

This is what the journey's like.

This is exactly what the journey's like.

In our hearts,

We know it,

But maybe it's not showing up anywhere else.

That's kind of chronic on the journey.

And you will eventually be shown about your move.

It'll become clear,

Just like it's always become clear,

Finally.

But it's somehow important you get that there's this angelic support.

For some reason,

I'm getting like a lot of,

To really make this,

Bring this home to you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You can call on them.

Archangel Michael,

Archangel Gabriel.

Just call on them.

Okay,

Sweet one,

You have all this one's compassion,

Too.

Yeah,

Many blessings.

Yeah.

Okay,

You guys.

More.

Yeah.

I wouldn't mind coming in,

Pramasiddha.

Miriam,

Yeah,

Please.

Really lovely to see you guys.

That was really unsettling.

Well,

Yeah,

It was unsettling,

But I'm going to touch on what you were talking about,

Because I resonated a lot with what you were saying about,

You know,

Being in my head and not being in my body.

And the effects of the past,

Whether it's this lifetime or,

You know,

Lifetimes and lifetimes and lifetimes ago.

And I think,

You know,

What I'm doing is that I have that awareness now,

Or like,

Be able to witness when I am completely disconnected from myself and from the universe,

Whatever I'm connected to.

And it's not easy,

But I'm able to stay with it.

And it's a challenge.

And sometimes I can come back to being center.

I mean,

Part of the journey for me is to be connected,

Be connected in here,

As well as with whatever is out there that I am part of,

And it's part of me.

And not to lose that connection when I'm around,

When I'm outside in the world,

When I'm,

You know,

When everything outside of me may feel not so good.

Miriam,

I'm,

I'm,

Like,

Thrilled,

Like,

I'm thrilled at your innocence,

Okay,

That you are aware of when you feel disconnected,

And then you,

You know,

You don't run from it.

That's,

That is it.

When you walk around being disconnected with starting prayers or whatever you can do for yourself,

Have a bath,

Whatever.

Like candles,

Like candles,

Do something like,

Because you know that it's like,

It's,

You're clearing your disconnection at these times,

You guys,

That that is so great.

Miriam,

My hat off,

Blessings to you for speaking.

I celebrate you.

You didn't,

You don't run from it.

When you,

And what you do is you just stay with it,

Stay with it,

Do what you can,

And know that when you connect up again,

That you have cleared material from other lives,

And your ego is less,

A little bit less.

But the fact that you take the responsibility,

That you're taking responsibility,

And you see,

You have just got on to the journey recently,

And this is it,

And this is what some people,

They don't get yet,

Is that we're responsible for the disconnection in our hearts.

And you,

You respond like a child with innocence.

You go,

Please,

Please help me.

And then you connect up to a bigger understanding.

And Miriam,

I really want you to get how deeply I celebrate you.

Sweet one.

Sweet one.

This is the antidote to the,

To the,

This is the solution to resistance.

This is the solution to everything.

You are personally embodying your truth,

And you notice.

So yay.

Well,

It's,

It's,

It's a case of,

You know,

I've lived my life from the outside in the last 60 odd years,

And I can't live like that anymore.

And,

And it's a struggle to,

To find,

Or to just embody whatever's inside of me.

You said a lot in this,

This satsang that resonated with me,

And you're absolutely right.

Not everything resonates with me,

You know,

But I can hear it.

I can hear it.

And,

And I come to the satsang because where I am today,

I need a community of people that are doing a journey,

Doing the journey,

However,

They may be doing that journey,

But they're doing the journey.

And that's why I come,

Because I can't do this on my own.

And there needs to be other people journeying alongside.

This is,

We're human,

We're mammals.

We need kind of a herd of some kind.

Exactly.

Yeah.

But,

But also that,

That I think you said about the,

You know,

There's an evolution going on as a spiritual and evolution of the soul going on.

I want to be part of that because I don't want to be part of what's out there.

I mean,

I'm here and I am part of it,

But I,

I,

I really want an evolution of the soul.

Yeah.

It's just too painful otherwise.

That's it.

Exactly.

That's it.

And that's the choice.

We have the choice to evolve consciously or not,

Because we're all going to be brought through the events that are going to happen,

Whatever they are.

Yeah.

So thank you for holding space.

Thank you.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I,

There's lots of,

Of the members resonated with what you said,

Miriam,

But we all need a herd of some kind,

You know,

We all need to belong somewhere.

But the important thing is you keep the eye on the,

The teaching,

Right?

It's not just a club.

Okay.

It's a club in,

In service of this higher understanding.

And it just decide whether the teacher is authentic or not.

Yeah.

And we're really used to kind of monk style teachers.

And we're really used to kind of monk style teachers,

But we need now teachers who are in the world of the world and can help navigate through the world.

Because we all have to do this.

Basically,

You know,

We're all being asked to wake up wherever we are outside of monastery.

And so actually,

Also,

We don't even know what an authentic teacher looks like.

You see,

Usually we have a picture of a kind of a monkish person.

Yeah.

This was important just to decide because,

You know,

Last week it was with the,

It's sort of like,

We won't be able to move forward if we have a lot of people who are like,

Ambivalent,

You know.

Yeah.

It was actually good that the resistance came up so strongly and was spoken by an individual,

Because this is the clearing.

Because the content of what was spoken is exactly what has been running in some of your minds underneath.

So it's good.

It's come up to be cleared.

And it's not separate from anybody or away from anybody.

It wouldn't have happened.

Yeah,

It's all good.

Yeah,

Just look at it like a clearing.

It was a,

You know,

Be grateful that there was a clearing that took place in the satsang that made what I was talking about incredibly visible and illustrated with exactly what I was talking about at the beginning of the journey,

At the beginning of the satsang.

There it was in its glory.

So it's good.

It's a clearing for everybody.

Yeah,

Bless your hearts.

Is there anybody else wishing to speak?

Can I share an experience?

Is that okay?

Sure,

Happy.

Um,

So the beginning of the satsang,

This little one was crying.

She's sick.

She didn't get her breakfast.

I could barely hear.

And it was I just wanted to hear what you said.

I put the captions on.

She's like,

I want to go outside and like all this stuff.

And you were talking.

And there was a moment I was just like,

Stop resisting,

Right?

So I stopped resisting.

Like,

She's like,

Stop moving.

Like she's making all these Okay,

Just sweetie,

Slow down and speak.

Okay,

So I stopped resisting.

And she fell asleep.

And I was able to just hear then everything you said and heard the whole satsang.

I just wanted to share that like,

I find that so much as a in my parenting to like,

If I just stop resisting,

You know,

Like,

I think it speaks to so much of what you're saying,

How,

Like,

We're creating this resistance,

We're getting in our own way.

And then we just let it flow.

Like,

It just,

You know,

It just happens like things just it's like,

I don't,

It's so much more beyond us,

You know,

Like,

It just comes together more than we could imagine.

And I just want to share that because it's like,

It was like,

Literally this satsang.

And she was just crying so much.

And I just stopped,

You know,

Trying to fix everything or like,

You know what I mean?

Yeah,

That's all work until you stop resisting.

Yeah.

And that is the key to motherhood to write all the moms.

This is what happens with our kids.

And we try to fix and everything.

And then we just like,

Give it over.

And everything calms down.

Thank you for speaking.

It's very,

Very clear.

And also,

Again,

It's like you had the ability to witness yourself and change gears.

So witness Yeah,

I'm,

I'm,

I'm resisting.

This is showing me the resistance isn't working.

Okay,

I give up resistance,

You change gears,

And you could flow.

That's it,

You guys.

This is the journey.

This is all I'm asking for.

It seems to me very small.

Hello.

It's good.

Thank you for speaking.

I know your name is not Jen,

Right?

I've forgotten it just for a second.

Sorry,

I,

I go.

It's a long story.

But um,

It's still maybe my my higher self.

I call Nicole.

Okay.

Okay.

So you call your heart but your physical name is Jen.

Yeah.

Okay.

Okay.

You should write maybe Jen Nicole.

I forget sometimes how to edit it.

Okay,

No,

It's all good.

It's all good.

Okay,

Jen.

Okay,

That's good.

It's either it's all good.

So good.

Remember,

Though,

Just by keeping it,

You see that you're keeping them separate,

Right by giving them different names,

Right?

Yeah,

I kind of like I talked to her.

So you're right.

I keep it separate.

Okay,

That might be something to look at,

You know,

Just it's true.

Yes,

I yes,

It's it's my own barrier and resistance there.

Yeah,

Just seeing just seeing this is just where our egos are tricky.

And maybe it's more,

It's it keeps things more stable for you.

Like,

That's what you can handle right now.

But and so it's not wrong.

But just,

You know,

Seeing the whole picture.

Yeah,

It's a bit of a separation.

But maybe it's what I need right now.

Yeah.

And in all transparency,

It's a pen name that I use when I'm right.

So that's why it came up as a different name to how we handshaked kind of,

Okay.

Okay,

Nicole is your pen name when you write?

Yeah.

Okay,

So you're using Okay,

Well,

That's good.

That's good.

Okay,

So that's less separate,

Right?

Anyway,

Just,

It's not a judging thing.

It's just an observing thing,

You guys.

It's like,

Yeah,

Whatever works.

You know,

And it all takes time.

Blessings to all.

Yeah.

Yeah,

Blessings.

Okay,

Well,

If that's,

That's it.

You guys,

Thank you for lasting the whole,

The whole thing.

And it's like,

You know,

Mom was sort of slamming the kitchen cupboards a bit.

Those children slam slam.

But it's,

It's also good.

It's also good.

I and I,

I feel like you heard me.

Many of you heard me.

And,

You know,

The,

This will change things.

And even the fact there was this expression of resistance.

This will just change things and just look at it like,

Sure,

It's unsettling,

But it was just the resistance dissolving.

Yeah.

Coming up to consciousness being expressed declare.

Yeah.

And nobody's sinning.

There's no sin.

It's all good.

Okay.

Okay.

Love you guys with all my heart.

Okay.

Blessings.

Blessings.