03:03

Here's The Skinny On Resentment And Self-Pity

by Premasudha Janet Hobbs

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4.7
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talks
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Meditation
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Experienced
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106

During Satsang, Michelle ('Shel) brought up the two traps of resentment and self-pity. Premasudha said that it was a big spiritual achievement to be able to step back from our storylines enough to witness them. When we learn to do this, we are able to discern the self-pitying or resentment-filled storylines we might mistake for absolute truth. Resentment is more outward-focused in a blaming way than self-pity (which Premasudha says was her particular specialty!) But both are the two dog houses where we can get caught in, and they can sideline the spiritual journey for a whole lifetime if we don't realize that both are our ego talking. Premasudha really emphasizes that it is a triumph to be able to step back enough to notice the resentment and self-pity in our storylines. Simple observation, knowing they are just ego stories, will disempower them over time. Patience is needed!

ResentmentSelf PityFearThought ObservationSpiritual GrowthNegative ThoughtsSurrenderEgoPatienceResentment ManagementSelf Pity ManagementFear Root CauseNegative Thought AwarenessSurrender Practice

Transcript

Both resentment and self-pity come out of fear,

Okay?

That's the root.

Resentment is more focused outwards.

It's like,

You did that to me,

You,

Blah,

Blah,

Blah.

Self-pity is more like,

Oh,

Poor me.

The world's so hard on me,

Okay?

So resentment is a little bit more overtly anger-based,

Anger towards others,

Okay?

So the most powerful thing you can do is when you're in that storyline,

Realize it rather than seeing it as truth,

Okay?

With all our eco-storylines,

We tend to see both our self-pity stories and our resentment stories as truth.

It's just fact,

And it isn't.

Yeah,

So,

You know,

If you can just recognize that it's a storyline of resentment,

Then you can go,

Oh,

This is the resentment that Premasiddhu was talking about.

This is just fear,

And you just give the whole story over to the creator,

Over to Amma,

Over to Jesus.

It is the act,

Okay,

You guys,

This is really important.

It is the act of noticing that is the powerful thing.

Noticing,

And then giving it over.

You know,

Even if you feel you can't give it over,

Even just saying,

Well,

I give it over,

Even if it sounds hollow,

That you know you're not giving it over at all,

But just steering that way.

Yeah,

To be able to draw back and notice the content of your thinking is a huge spiritual step,

A huge shift into more truth.

It's,

You know,

Medal of honor,

Really,

To be able to do it.

And the thing is,

Sort of the sad thing is,

Is that the more you're able to notice your thoughts,

The more you'll notice the amount of kind of sewagey thoughts and it'll be,

You'll think it's your fault or that you're being bad,

Do you see?

Whereas noticing this is the triumph,

Because Amma says,

You know,

We're full of sewage at this time,

Do you see?

And most people just don't notice,

They think it's real,

They think it's just the truth.

So if you can notice,

You know,

Negative thoughts,

The resentment stories,

The self-pity stories,

That's just a huge triumph,

You guys.

Meet your Teacher

Premasudha Janet HobbsNorth Vancouver, BC, Canada

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© 2026 Premasudha Janet Hobbs. All rights reserved. All copyright in this work remains with the original creator. No part of this material may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.

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