53. More Money, Less Problems: Creating A Healthy Money Consciousness

Money represents a lot of different things for different people,

Right?

We assign a lot of emotions,

Importance to how much money one has.

The understanding is that there is energy in everything.

And our soul's journey in this physical world is to find the balanced way to enjoy the energy,

The light,

The blessing in all things spiritual and physical.

This idea that if you want to have a healthy relationship with money that you're getting more from but you're also giving back with,

Like you would in a romantic relationship,

Like you would with your relationship with your children,

Like you would with your relationship with yourself.

It's the one area in our physicality really that we kind of have it all backwards.

It's very much within the desire to receive.

An individual will always be limited by the most they can think.

So if a person does really believe that he or she is limited in the amount of money and or fulfillment that they can receive from money,

That will always be the case.

Welcome to the Spiritually Hungry Podcast,

Episode 53.

So when we came up with this topic,

It was around a meeting we had with some students or a dinner rather,

And the topic of money came up and all things about money,

Feelings surrounding it,

Wanting to have it,

Feeling badly about wanting to have it.

It's complicated.

And funnily enough,

You know,

We're in California,

As you know,

And on the flight here,

Abigail was watching.

It's actually a great show.

They canceled it for some reason,

But Girl Meets World.

And this was about money.

It's called Girl Meets Money.

And there's a few ideas discussed in it and she wanted to make sure I gave her a shout out.

Yay,

Abigail.

Thanks Abigail.

She helped construct this episode and she really did give some feedback and she was very passionate about it because she is excited to help heal the world by giving money away to those in need.

So yes,

It's very much inspired by her.

But money,

If we just like,

Let's just talk about money,

Right?

So basically it's a piece of paper that the US government decided has a lot of happen.

And before that,

I think what it was like livestock was something that was- Well,

It's actually interesting.

And again,

This is not really on the spiritual side,

But for many,

Many years people who studied economies and money believed that the world progressed from a barter economy where people would,

You know,

If I had a cow and you had bread,

I would give you- Exchange livestock or shiny things.

And that in order to enable people the ease of transforming that barter system into something that easier to move around,

I can hold onto coins easier than I can hold onto livestock or bread.

And that's how our current modern economies came into being.

Interestingly,

That's not- later times,

Basically in the 70s and 80s,

Economists now believe that that's not the reason or how our modern economies came into being,

Which is an interesting- Well,

You've got to follow up with,

So what is then?

Well,

That it wasn't- the basic theory was that,

Again,

We came from a barter system and at a certain point,

Society decided,

Civilization decided- A new convenient,

More convenient way.

It's much more convenient rather than,

Again,

If I had- A cow.

A few coves of bread and you had a few cows instead of me having to hold onto all my bread until somebody had something that I needed,

I could transfer that bread into money by you buying it from me,

For example.

And then whenever I needed something from you,

I can use that same currency.

So it was basically a way to make the barter system easier.

But research has found that that's probably not what happened,

That there's another reason.

The monetary system that we have actually developed as a way for people to be able to really owe and repay in a way that people can acknowledge.

So it's more about owing money,

Being able to find ways that make sense or that people can hold onto that allows us to use money or what we don't necessarily have.

If I owe you,

If you have,

Again,

Something that I need and I don't have the money to pay it,

I don't have a way to repay you,

We can start a ledger where you owe me something,

I owe you something and over time that either gets accounted for or gets released.

Also with more pieces of paper,

We actually assign value to these pieces of paper.

Well,

Again,

Initially,

The history is that initially it actually had an inherent value so that you could actually- But you don't need 10 cows,

For instance.

What about cows?

I'm saying even the monetary system that we have today,

The dollar used to be backed by gold,

For example,

And you could actually go to the government and say,

Okay,

Here's my $1.

I want $1 worth of gold because every bill that was printed by most large countries was backed by some sort of commodity,

Gold or silver or otherwise.

But that's no longer the case today.

Today,

Again,

It simply is a form that is accepted by many to have some value.

Right.

But when you look at it this way,

It's interesting how it came to be.

And also,

I think money is,

If you want to just look at it this way,

It's purely symbolic.

It can represent greed,

Envy,

Power,

Happiness,

Perhaps temporary security,

Potential status.

So money represents a lot of different things for different people.

We assign a lot of emotions,

Importance to how much money one has.

Which further complicates our relationship with money.

Right.

I was going to say,

Of our lives,

It is probably one of the most prone areas to stress and fear and anxiety.

Of course,

Also in some cases to joy and fulfillment.

Depending on the energy and thought behind it.

Right.

But probably more than almost any other part of our lives.

We often talk about relationships.

It's certainly an area where people either draw great happiness or great sadness and pain.

Certainly money and all that surrounds it is one of the main areas.

And that's why I think it's such an important topic to understand,

Maybe transform our understanding from a spiritual perspective.

Because it is,

Again,

A source for most people in the world of,

Again,

Anxiety,

Fears,

And again at times of joy.

And we know many wars are fought because of money.

Many crimes are committed because money is involved somehow.

And also we have this false belief system that something is better because it's more expensive.

Like on this show,

Again,

With Abigail,

They showed two t-shirts that were identical.

Same color,

Same size,

Same saying on the shirt.

And one was $12.

99,

The other one was $36.

So which one is better?

You would assume the more expensive one is because maybe the material is softer.

Or just because it's more expensive,

It must be if it's worth more than it's better,

Which again is not true.

So just some statistics about stress that money causes.

In APA's latest Stress in America survey,

They found that 72% of Americans reported feeling stressed about money at least some time in the prior month.

According to the 2021 Capital One Credit Wise Survey,

73% of Americans rank their finances as the most significant source of stress in their life.

70% is a lot.

70% of married couples argue about money ahead of fights about household chores,

Togetherness,

Sex,

Snoring,

And what's for dinner.

It was number one?

It's the most for 70% of married couples.

64% of couples without children under 18 argue about money,

While 80% of couples with children younger than 18 argue about money.

So clearly we need to get around this.

Now I think also we need to look at our own unique psychology around money because I think everybody has a different relationship with it.

I think part of it is how we grew up.

So if you grew up in a home where your father had a lot of money,

Millions,

And then lost it all,

That's going to impact your relationship with money.

For better or worse,

You might think that it's fleeting.

Even if a grandfather,

He was a great entrepreneur and he lost it all in some gamble,

Then maybe that would create for the rest of the family to be really selective and very tight with money as a result.

Right.

I would say that I would separate two things out.

One is things that actually happened.

The second part of that is what people's emotional reaction to it was.

Because for example,

Growing up for instance,

We did not have really a lot of money.

We bought clothes in thrift shops,

But we never had the sense of lack.

So maybe if you looked in our family,

In my parents' bank account at the time,

You would find nothing.

But growing up,

There was no emotional sense of lack.

They didn't feel less than or undeserving or shame for not having it.

Whereas for instance,

I know in your example where your father had a lot of money and then lost a lot of money,

I think that that occurrence,

That is probably on its own can be obviously negative and detrimental,

But probably the greater scars that it left,

If it did,

Would be his reaction to that and how that was spoken of and how that was related and how that was felt in the house.

Right.

And that is where most value was placed is if you have money,

Then you're worthwhile.

What I made though,

And I can't speak from all my sisters,

But I made the conscious choice that I wasn't going to put that much value in money because look at what happens,

Right?

Look how people live their lives.

And luckily I found spirituality at a young age.

So I was able to really go adjust my feelings or really decide what kind of feelings or relationship I wanted to have with money.

But for many,

I don't think that they ever actually go and look at their history,

Their roots and say,

Okay,

Well,

This is what I grew up seeing.

This is what scares me.

This is what I have anxiety about.

Some people can have a lot of money and they never spend it because they're afraid that they'll run out.

Or many people have not a lot of money and they overspend.

Right?

So we do a lot of things.

And I would add to that,

And there are people who have not so much money,

But enjoy it and people have a lot of money and don't enjoy it,

Which I think,

I think again,

As we will hopefully expand further,

I think that's probably the most important question around money.

Not so much how do you have more?

How do you have less?

How much do you have?

How much is enough?

And I think that's a life where I enjoy what I have,

Be it great or not as much.

And also we know that a lot of people,

Especially kids that come from a lot of money,

Sometimes they feel shame about it because they feel undeserving.

Like why do I have all this when my friends may not?

And we also know that there are children who are also ashamed to have their friends to their house because they're embarrassed for not having.

So it creates a lot of different feelings around guilt,

Shame,

Worthiness.

And I do want to talk about the Kabbalistic understanding of money because I think that money can be used obviously for positive or negative.

You can bring out positive and negative behaviors in all of us.

And there's also this understanding,

I think for some,

That if you are truly,

In fact,

It was something that I read,

That if you truly are a spiritual being,

Yeah,

Here it is.

Okay.

So someone once asked a wise rabbi,

Why should I be a spiritual being?

And he said,

Why should you of all people have such a splendid courtyard?

Why are you so truly Royal enjoying great plenty in a life of luxury?

Shouldn't a rabbi and a righteous person serve as an example to others to be satisfied with little and to have a life of real hardship?

And the rabbi answered him among many others,

But I want to focus on this part and I thought we could talk about it,

But Moses was one of the greatest teachers and he grew up in a palace,

Right?

Abraham was also very wealthy.

There's many patriarchs,

Matriarchs.

So what is this idea?

Because I think people often,

And I think that's part of the reason that people choose for themselves.

Like if I'm a spiritual being,

I can't be a wealthy being.

If I'm a wealthy being,

I can't pursue spirituality.

If I'm a this,

I'm a that.

And it's never black or white and anything,

But this idea of money,

There is a spiritual energy in money.

Of course.

So I think certainly the Kabbalistic view,

I would argue the spiritual view is different than I think some people misunderstand,

Right?

There is this view that if you're spiritual,

You are divorced of the physical world.

And therefore in the story that you mentioned,

People assume that certainly spiritually elevated people,

But certainly people who are desiring a spiritual life divorce themselves or to some degree less in the enjoyment that they receive from money or even from this physical world.

Right.

Then that would translate to also food,

Right?

Everything.

Sex,

Anything.

And again,

There are,

I know certain spiritual traditions that,

That that is their teaching.

That is not certainly the Kabbalistic teaching or the Kabbalistic way.

The understanding is that there is energy in everything.

And our soul's journey in this physical world is to find the balanced way to enjoy the energy,

The light,

The blessing and all things spiritual and physical.

As a matter of fact,

The very essence of the word Kabbalah,

Which is the ancient word for this wisdom tradition is to receive.

And really at the core,

It's all about how do I receive more and how do I receive more in the right way?

And for what purpose?

Of course,

For what purpose?

But what that leads us to understand is that not only does a spiritual life not preclude desiring and growing in physical blessings,

Be it money or otherwise,

As a matter of fact,

It's a necessary part of our spiritual life to desire more and receive more,

But in the proper and balanced way.

And like you mentioned,

Many of the great sages and teachers,

Moses,

Abraham,

They were very wealthy men.

And there's actually an interesting teaching that says that the source of wisdom and the source of wealth actually has the same spiritual source.

And therefore there are some teachers who actually say that in order to be a great spiritual revealer of wisdom,

One else has to have access at least to great wealth.

So explain the same source.

So we know that every blessing comes from a supernal,

A non-physical spiritual source.

So money has its source,

And the Kabbalistic term for that would be a sod.

And that's all- So these are spiritual planes for our listeners that aren't that familiar.

Right,

Right.

So the point is if you.

.

.

One of the important aspects of spiritual study and understanding is that,

Let's assume,

And to use an example around money,

Let's assume you need a loan,

Right?

You're not going to go to the butcher for a loan,

Right?

You'll go to the bank for a loan or for somebody who has money to lend.

If you want meat,

You go to the butcher.

If you want vegetables,

You go to the farm.

So you have to know what the source of everything is in order to be able to access it.

And part of the spiritual understanding is learning what is the source of this blessing.

A person,

For instance,

Who doesn't have children,

Wants to have children,

There's a source for that.

There are therefore tools that one can use to access that blessing.

So there's like 10 gateways to different unique blessings you want to access,

As you just mentioned.

Exactly.

So if it's a little like sustenance,

If it's children blessings in that way,

If it's health,

It would be another gateway.

Exactly.

And therefore,

One of those Kabbalists teaches that the gateway or the place from which the blessings of wisdom come is the same place from which the blessings of wealth come.

And therefore,

You will find throughout the history that there are often great spiritual teachers who also had great physical wealth.

Of course,

They use it probably more different than most people do,

But that's not besides the point,

But that's a separate point.

Although there are also great teachers and spiritual giants who were not wealthy.

And that's again.

.

.

But the point is that they are not only not antithetical to each other,

They are in a true spiritual sense,

United and necessary.

And therefore,

If you understand that,

You accept that.

A very important part of my spiritual growth has to be a growing of my desire.

Often people come to me,

Whether they're at different points in their lives,

Especially if somebody has worked for many years and even been successful.

And they say,

If I want to be spiritual,

Maybe I should just retire and spend all of my time in study and spiritual work.

And the reality often is that through working and through even the attainment of money,

One can achieve the most important spiritual development and growth.

So I think the basic understanding is this,

That desiring money with a proper consciousness,

With the proper thought,

Is actually an important part of our spiritual development.

Because the view is this,

The light of the creator is endless.

And we are created to receive endless blessings.

The purpose of the spiritual work and study and process is how do I access those endless blessings for yourself?

But if I think,

If a person thinks that there's something wrong or unspiritual with attaining,

With making money,

With attaining wealth,

Then they are actually closing,

Just with that consciousness,

They're closing themselves up to the potential blessing that I meant to come out.

What's so powerful about this,

Because you can apply that then to every single thing in our lives.

And we are physical beings.

So we are supposed to enjoy the physicality of this world.

Of course,

Again,

With the right consciousness,

With the right desire,

The more money you have,

Hopefully the greater desire is to go and share that with many and the world.

But I think also,

You know,

People do this with relationships.

They want the relationship,

But they don't think they're deserving of it.

So they basically block or close that gateway.

And same thing with children.

Maybe they have a past that they're ashamed of and therefore they think they're not deserving.

Right?

So I think the beautiful part of this conversation,

I think it's so necessary for people to really understand that,

That every gateway is meant to be open.

And that is the purpose of spiritual practice is that through learning and study and applying those tools,

That is how you're able to open the gateway so that your physical life can be as pleasurable as your spiritual life.

So much so that there's a teaching that says that when a person leaves this physical world,

He's actually taken to,

He or she had taken to account for physical blessing that he or she were meant to enjoy and did not.

Oh,

So let's unpack that.

Yeah.

Just that,

That,

You know,

There are people,

Again,

Sometimes it comes from a spiritual place,

Or I would say a misunderstanding of spiritual wisdom that,

You know,

I'm not meant to enjoy money or I'm not meant to enjoy sex or any areas of my life.

The spiritual view is that,

That,

That,

Yes,

Of course there's consciousness around it,

But that we are meant to,

And that's why we're here.

We're not here to,

To abstain.

We're here to receive in the proper way.

Yes.

But all physical things,

All physical blessings are meant to be accessed endlessly and meant to be enjoyed.

That's why we're here.

I mean,

That's the thing with spirituality and specifically Kabbalah,

It's to teach you how to not short circuit in all of those things that we participate in the physical world.

Right?

So when people abuse their bodies or sex or what any area,

Right?

The whole idea of spirituality is really so you learn how to balance the different columns,

The different energy.

And therefore really be able to enjoy it because if it's not balanced,

It's usually not as enjoyable as where it is balanced.

We get so broken with it all.

Some people are just like,

I'm just,

I don't want any part of it because I don't know how to be healthy with it.

I don't know how to use it properly.

So we abandon it all together and that's a mistake.

So I'll give you an example.

One of,

One of our students came to me some time ago and he,

He was saying,

And again,

He is in his fifties.

He had worked in relatively successful and his mind,

He was saying,

Okay,

The next chapter of my life,

I want to devote to spirituality.

So for him,

That meant,

You know,

Selling off or we're basically retiring from work.

So to decide to do it in like,

You know,

This was this chapter.

Well,

A lot of people do that,

Right.

I mean,

And rightfully so,

Right.

People,

I think it is important,

You know,

This case was different to my mind,

But a person says,

Okay,

I've done this for this amount of time.

Now I want to try something else or I want to do something different.

But yeah.

Okay.

But I think that ideally one should try to participate in all aspects of their lives.

Of course you can't give equal attention to those things,

But I don't think that,

I think you're going to burn out.

I think that you'll only enjoy,

You know,

Let's say 10 years of your life,

You're only devoting to your work and your career and nothing else.

Well,

Then in those 10 years,

You're actually missing out on a lot of things,

A lot of opportunities,

A lot of understandings,

A lot of joy.

It's kind of like going through life with like blinders on,

Right.

I think it's an important point because I think a lot of people do do that and I think it's a mistake.

But for him,

There was an additional element to it,

Which is that he was not able to not become stressed in his work.

And my advice to him was,

That's why he wanted to abandon it.

That was one of the reasons.

So it wasn't really for the spiritual.

Exactly.

Right.

So in his mind,

It was,

That was a justifiable reason.

Yes.

If I,

Because I don't want stress,

Which is understandable and right.

We should not really,

We should find the way,

Ways to decrease stress in our lives.

And he wanted to devote more time to spirituality.

What I said was that your soul's process,

What we call tikkun,

That correction and growth that each one of us is meant to have in our lives is probably more readily achieved when you're at work in the office and those situations come at you and you're able to find the way through your spiritual study and understanding not to be reactive to them,

Not to be stressed by them.

Yeah,

Of course,

If you go to a mountain and spend the next 10 years meditating and studying and not being involved in their work,

Probably much easier not to be stressed,

Probably much easier not to be reactive,

But less possible that you will be growing and changing from it.

That's what I said.

When people are not connecting with their physicality in a healthy way,

They abandon those parts altogether and avoid them.

And that's just not,

That's never the answer.

Because no growth will come from that.

And the view is that the understanding is that we hear yes to be spiritual beings,

The spiritual beings in the physical world,

Which again,

So once you really accept,

Understand that we are meant,

Our consciousness should be,

That I want more of everything,

The next question has to be,

Is it about more or is it about enjoying it more?

And I want to stress this point because I think it's so important because everybody in this world is at a different place financially.

Some people have a lot,

Some people don't have a lot,

Some people lack.

And I think the most important question is not whether I have,

I had yesterday,

I had one dollar today,

I have two,

But rather am I able to extract more enjoyment,

More pleasure,

More fulfillment out of what I have?

Because there's no question you will have two people,

One with more money,

One with less money.

The person with less money can be much more fulfilled in their lives than the person with more money.

So the actual number is not as important as whether I am able to access the energy in it.

Well,

Do you think that that also,

I mean,

I do that,

That opens the gateway then to create more money also,

But that is almost secondary because if you never get to the point where you are able to enjoy the light or the energy within your money,

Whether you have $1 or $1,

000,

Then having $2,

000,

My point is this,

If you,

If you can enjoy $1,

Then it's very possible that when you get $2,

Now you'll have double the amount of pleasure and fulfillment.

But if you have $1,

000 and you have zero enjoyment out of it,

Having $2,

000 will actually not give you any more enjoyment,

Pleasure or fulfillment.

Actually it might even make it worse.

So at the core,

When you understand that money is energy and that more important than the actual number is the amount of pleasure and fulfillment you can extract out of it,

That becomes the number one priority rather than just making sure one becomes two and two becomes four.

So that's important as well once you're able to have the ability to extract the energy from the money.

Well,

It's also like the mentality I'll be happy when,

Right?

So if you can't actually enjoy the dollar,

Yeah,

Then two will not be enough,

Three will not be enough,

Four,

So on and so forth,

Right?

The energy of a dollar is going,

If you really appreciate that $1,

Then that $1,

If you have a thousand of those $1,

Right,

Your appreciation then grows.

So I think it's like even,

You know,

We all look at pennies on the floor and there's that superstition you should really,

You know,

When you see a penny,

Find a penny,

Pick it up all day long,

You'll have good luck.

But nobody picks up a penny.

They're dirty and they're almost useless really at this point.

But if you were to take,

You needed to get home on the bus and you had $1.

49 cents,

That penny would really suddenly be very valuable,

Right?

But I think that needs to be our change in our approach to how we view even a cent.

Right.

The most important consciousness around money.

Don't you accept that I am meant to have more?

Well,

That's going to be a tough one for people to get from.

I can tell you that for most of the world from where they are today to that first idea,

It's not that easy that I can have,

What did you say?

That I am meant to have more.

I don't think a lot of people believe that they are.

Really?

Yeah,

I think people are really complicated about it because it goes back to worth,

Right?

It's not so much.

.

.

But most of the world,

I would challenge that because I think most of the world,

Why do they go to work?

Why are they building?

Why are they entrepreneurs?

Because they want to have more.

Wanting and believing that you can have more two different things.

Maybe.

I'm not sure.

I'm not sure.

I would like to argue this.

I would really.

.

.

I know really,

I really do believe that.

I think that people,

That's why they settle in jobs and they stay in places they're not even happy because they don't believe that they could make more money doing something that they actually love because it's very complicated because our worth is very much tied into and our value on how much people are willing to pay us for what we do.

They're not necessarily equal.

Again,

People go to work because they want to have more money than they had the day before.

Correct.

If they didn't want to have more money today,

Then yesterday they would have gone to work.

Everybody wants more money.

Not everybody thinks that they can have more money.

It's different.

I think maybe what I would agree with is that most people underestimate what they can have.

True.

I think we're saying the same thing,

Michael Berg,

Just differently.

Again,

Because again,

If a person has one dollar in his or her bank and he or she did not believe that they could have more,

They want to go to work the next day.

Yes,

But they might think that there's a cap at $1,

000 when they really,

Like you said,

The bank at the end of their life,

That they were meant to have $20,

000,

Whatever the number is.

There's a big disparity between the two.

So I think that people often underestimate what they can have.

Yes.

What they can have.

That's what I said.

Yes.

As always,

You are right and I am wrong.

Your second point.

That again,

The most important element is not so much about having more money,

Although that is important,

Is how do I extract more joy or fulfillment out of what I have?

And I think in order to achieve that,

I think there's at least I have a list of three areas of consciousness around money that will hopefully open us and our listeners up to be able to manifest to receive what they are meant to have.

So the first.

.

.

I love a good list.

Yes,

You do.

Is the understanding that as all energy,

For instance,

We talked about children.

Our view towards our children is not that they are ours,

But that they are given to us for many reasons,

Some of which we can understand,

Some of which we do not,

To assist in their process.

But not that we own them and that they are ours,

Certainly in relationships.

We do not view our spouse,

Our partner as ours,

But a gift really given to us to allow us to have a relationship,

To allow us to have joy and fulfillment.

So too,

As it relates to money.

The way to make sure that any money that I have is able to give me endless fulfillment is first to know that it's not mine.

Once I take ownership over it,

Which means that I believe that the only reason that I have it is because I worked really hard and I earned it,

When in reality,

Probably 10 people worked harder than me that don't have as much as I have.

But a lot of people get really lucky and it doesn't make sense.

Because all money is really a blessing,

To some extent unearned.

The light of the Creator blesses all of us to differing degrees,

Depending on our soul's needs and purpose,

With different levels of monetary manifestation.

But at the end of the day,

If a person says consciously or unconsciously,

If the ego says,

This is mine,

Then he or she is basically cutting off the energy within that money from its source,

From the light to the Creator.

So the flow kind of stops.

The flow stops and therefore the money is almost dead.

It's not blessed money.

So money with it.

You cut off the energy from that money.

Do you think that affects how much a person enjoys their money?

All of it.

It definitely affects how much he or she enjoys it.

And it also definitely affects how much more he or she can and will receive.

And is this then where tithing would come in?

Yes.

So that was my third point.

But- Oh,

Sorry.

I don't want to mess your list up.

You don't want to wait on that?

No,

No,

No.

It's a good idea.

Right.

I think it's really important.

I think a lot of people consider it charity,

Which it is not.

It's not.

It's completely separate.

Right.

So maybe that was your second point?

Am I guessing the list?

No,

I'll go.

So number two is if you really understand that money is energy,

I want to make sure that I get more light,

More,

I maintain more energy within my money.

And flow.

And therefore I'll be able to receive more fulfillment from it.

And it's blessed money.

I can't take ownership on it.

My ego cannot say it's mine because I earned it and it's all mine.

One of the ways to make sure that that consciousness of not owning ego-based my money is by making sure that I infuse it with an action of sharing.

Those who do tithing,

Which is one-tenth of their money,

They give away to either to somebody else who needs or places that need or that can be assisted with that.

But really it's about making sure that our entire consciousness,

And of course manifested an action around money,

Has what we call a desire to share infused in it.

Because if you really understand why at the end of the day did the light of the creator give me these $10,

For me to enjoy it,

Yes.

But also if I am to maintain the energy within this money,

Some of it has to be shared.

And I don't share because I'm a kind person,

Again it's good to be a kind person,

A spiritual person,

A giving person.

But we always say sharing is the most selfish thing you can actually do.

Because what it does is it maintains,

It's one of the ways that I am able to maintain the blessing,

The energy within my money.

So when I view,

So when you,

The way the Kabbalists say it,

You know,

Most people if you have $10 and you give $1 away to somebody who needs it,

In your mind,

I had 10,

I gave one away,

I got to keep my nine.

When in reality,

The spiritual way to view it is these 10 are not mine.

But if I give one of them to somebody else who needs,

Then these,

I get to use these nine.

So it's a really,

It's the opposite way of viewing certainly our money,

Our ownership of it or lack of ownership.

And more importantly,

The necessity,

The necessity for there to be a flow of giving from within my money so that it maintains its energy,

Most importantly,

It maintains its blessing for me.

So again,

Then the second would be charity and the charity or tithing.

No,

But there are two different things.

Because tithing,

No,

Because I think that people could think that,

Okay,

I give once a year,

You know,

When it's time for taxes or whatever,

And I give to this big thing and that was a nice thing to do.

And it is,

Of course,

Right?

But then there's something where with the paycheck that you get each month or you've got a big inheritance or something unexpected and you give 10% of that with the idea that none of it is yours.

And you're giving to the physicality,

Right?

You're giving that a percentage of it back to source.

Right.

But again,

I think truly are two ways of giving.

I think though the most important consciousness,

Whether however one,

However one manages it,

You know,

They give it once a year or whether they give it when a big occurrence occurs.

I think most important is the consciousness around it.

Right.

I think when you look at your bank account and you say,

This is all mine and now I'm going to decide whether I'll give this guy or this person who needs,

It's all wrong.

It's all wrong.

Well,

Isn't there that idea that you shouldn't count your money?

There's that also that Kenny Rogers song.

You never count your money.

You never count your money.

When you sit at the table.

You're sitting with me at the table.

One of my parents' favorite songs.

I know Karen especially.

But yes,

That's true that,

That kabbalistically there's a concept that because you want all your blessings to be limitless,

You want to keep them as concealed as possible.

So unnecessarily counting your money puts a limit on them and you want to,

You don't want to do that.

But as we said before,

One of the greatest ways that we put limits on not only how much money we have,

But more importantly,

How much pleasure fulfillment we can receive out of the money that we have is by taking ownership,

Cutting it off from its source,

Not injecting consistently into my relationship with money,

The action of sharing.

I think I might've shared this one of our previous podcasts.

My monities asks a very interesting question.

If you decide to give $1,

000 away sharing,

Is it better to give $1,

000 check to one person who really,

Or one organization that really needs it?

Or is it better to give $1 to a thousand organization or a thousand people?

$1 to a thousand different places.

And so my monity says it's important.

The best action would be to do a thousand actions of sharing.

Because you're spreading it now,

Right?

More important than spreading it,

You're,

Because why am I giving?

At the end of the day,

I'm giving because I need to give.

I know that from my relationship to be healthy with my money,

For another,

For my money to be blessed,

In order for my money to have energy with it,

The concept,

The consciousness of sharing has to be with it all the time.

So if I give up money once a year,

Am I really thinking about sharing?

I have my money at the 11 months,

Probably not.

And that's a mistake.

Because in order for money,

The energy within money to be alive,

In order for money to be growing and to be fulfilling,

There has to be a constant consciousness of sharing imbued within it.

And therefore,

The more actions of sharing that we do,

Be they great or small,

But with understanding is the reason I am doing it is because I know this is not my money.

And I know that in order for money to maintain its blessing,

In order for money to maintain its energy,

For me,

I need to be in the process of sharing it.

So that's the second idea.

And the third is,

And it relates to everything we spoke about,

How do you keep it alive?

And it's true,

But all the blessing that we have is appreciation.

It is impossible for my money,

No matter if it's $1 or $1,

000,

To be fulfilling for me and no way for it to grow unless I am appreciating it.

And the more I appreciate it,

The more it is able to grow.

It is able to grow in the amount of fulfillment that it brings me,

The $1 that I have,

And allows it to grow to become $2.

And there's an ancient phrase that the Kabbalists use.

They say,

Azer bishvir sheltit asher,

Which means give,

Give it,

One tenth of your money,

Give of your money so that you become wealthier,

So that you have more.

And really all three of the concepts that we spoke about,

Or the conscience around it,

Is the way to guarantee that both the money that I have is fulfilling for me and that I will be blessed to have more.

It's interesting.

I was thinking about this as you were speaking.

That obviously is how we should approach every aspect of our lives.

And I think to some degree we do,

Right?

With our children or our relationship with self or our health,

Even the spiritual practice,

You go back in and you check again.

It's not something you look into your relationship with one time a year,

Right?

Absolutely.

And it's also more uniquely that,

And we don't do this with other areas of our life so much,

But it's the one that we just keep looking on how to get more,

How to receive more.

And unless you force yourself really to have this consciousness,

It's not the obvious thing.

It's not something that's really spoken about for the most part,

Right?

I mean,

Of course there are some religions that talk about tithing.

We know charity is good,

But this idea that if you want to have a healthy relationship with money that you're getting more from,

But you're also giving back with,

Like you would in a romantic relationship,

Like you would with your relationship with your children,

Like you would with your relationship with yourself,

It's the one area in our physicality really that we kind of have it all backwards.

It's very much rooted in the desire to receive.

Because I think also part of it,

And this is what I was thinking about when you were talking,

Is that it's an easier thing to kind of identify.

Of course it's an illusion,

Right?

Because somebody can be living in an apartment building and they're driving a Rolls Royce,

Right?

Or have a new whatever.

I think it's a way that we see,

We assume,

We judge that I know everything about this person based on what they have.

Where you wouldn't with children,

You never know what's going on in somebody's home,

Right?

You don't know what the relationship.

I think a lot of things you can pretend with.

The money thing,

It's a way that keeps us.

My point is,

I think it's even more confusing for us to have a healthy relationship with it because we misunderstand it so completely with how we relate to other people and how we relate to the world.

Right.

And I would add to that,

That one of the ways to deprive our money of its energy and therefore of its blessing is in any times that we either use it for the purpose of our ego,

Which means I need,

And fortunately,

You know,

This is often done.

I need people to know or to see that I am successful or that I have money.

Respect me.

Yeah.

Right.

Any action that a person does with their money that is for the purpose of their ego,

Which means not,

You're supposed to enjoy it,

Have an amazing meal,

Have an amazing vacation,

Right?

But the things that we do or don't do so that other people will view us in one way or another – that is one of the surest ways to deprive our money of its energy and our money's ability to then give us more fulfillment and give us more blessing.

So – and again,

This happens all the time,

But as is true of all important things,

One should care less of what anybody thinks about any area of their lives,

Certainly what others think about their success or lack thereof in their financial lives.

I just think it's also a big source of judgment.

I think people – Positive or negative?

Well,

There are people who might be – Yeah,

No,

But yeah,

Just judgment,

Full stop.

For sure.

A lot.

For sure.

And what I want to add to that,

And I think this is also really important,

Is that people's – again,

The mistake that a lot of people make as it relates to money is the thought that it's limited.

That if my bank account says this is how much I have,

That's all I have.

Because they also can't find – especially they can't figure out another way to get more,

Right?

If they just worked really hard to get what they had or they won the lottery,

Whatever it is,

Like,

Okay,

This was the one time it was going to get – this is my big break and that's it.

It's now capped.

And that consciousness limitation actually certainly limits our ability to both receive great fulfillment from whatever it is that we have and certainly gain or earn more.

The spiritual view around money is that it's limitless.

It's limitless in the fulfillment it can give me of what I currently have and it's also limitless in what I can receive.

And that,

I think,

Is a very big shift for most people.

But it's so important because consciousness is everything.

You will always – an individual will always be limited by the most they can think.

So if a person does really believe that he or she is limited in the amount of money and or fulfillment that they can receive from money,

That will always be the case.

The way to open oneself up to the limitless blessing both from the current money that they have and having more money is understanding that at the end of the day the energy within money is coming from the light to the creator.

That energy is limitless.

Limitless in fulfillment and limitless in amount.

There is something that I thought was kind of interesting that's like not very spiritual at all but I do think it's important.

It's this idea of frugality.

There's actually – it's a psychological disorder.

Do you know that?

It makes sense.

And it's a common symptom that's actually connected to obsessive compulsive personality disorder which is different and sometimes confused with OCD.

Individuals who suffer from this tend to be extremely detailed list makers and workaholics.

They also exhibit the following behaviors.

A tendency to skimp on essentials even if they have the money to spend and a miserly spending style like Scrooge from A Christmas Carol and it even extends to themselves.

Which I think again it's just so – it's interesting.

It's never really about like you said earlier how much money you have.

It's how you view it,

How much you're able to enjoy it and how much you're able to appreciate it.

The good news is that you can actually change any of that.

Some it will require more work and of course we have baggage as we said.

But it's really an opportunity because it is an energy and what a waste if you can't even enjoy what you have on every level.

Absolutely and that's why related to that the Zohar has an interesting teaching.

It says that there is actually a force in this world that can attach itself to a person's money where even if he or she has that they cannot enjoy it.

There's a verse that says,

Ôchir shamur leba'alav leratov which means wealth kept for an individual but to their detriment.

And that the Zohar says therefore that there's this energy.

Where does that come from then?

Where does that energy come from?

And how is it created for each person?

His or her consciousness around it.

Right?

So when a person – So fear,

Stress – But also related to all the three things we spoke about before.

If a person thinks,

Ôoh it's all mine,

My ego made it all for me.

A person does not inject sharing into it.

A person does not have appreciation for it.

The money's energy changes and it actually becomes – the money becomes surrounded by an energy that does not allow the individual to enjoy it.

So therefore it almost makes no difference how much quantitatively the value grows.

The fulfillment from it will have to be diminished almost non-existing.

And this is true.

Unfortunately many of us know people who have money but do not enjoy it,

Are not able to enjoy it.

It's interesting.

One of our kids,

I'm going to say which,

Very innocently asked me this question the other day about someone.

They're like,

ÔI don't really understand.

They have so much money and they don't spend it and they're getting older.

And if you look at like the span of their life,

In reality they're not really going to spend – they won't be able to spend all that money if they're living the way that they're living,

Right?

Not traveling,

Not enjoying,

Not so – but this fear,

Right?

And it's exactly what you're explaining.

It's like the money now is controlling them.

It has a hold over them and you really don't have the free will even to spend it or the desire and then it just – it goes unspent.

So all of that is almost for nothing.

Right.

And that's why,

You know,

The amount is not as important as the consciousness.

At all.

There are people who have very little but you can tell that their heart and their hands are always open to share.

They live a very rich life.

Exactly.

And therefore,

Whatever it is that they have brings them great joy and fulfillment and to others.

On the other hand,

You have people who have significantly more but their heart and their hands are closed and the effect of that always will be that they cannot enjoy whatever it is that is theirs,

Whatever it is that they keep.

It just reminded me of my grandfather,

My mother's father.

And when I was a kid,

Every – honestly,

Almost like every time he'd pass by me,

If I'd be at his house,

Like three times a week,

Four times a week,

He would do two things.

He'd come and bless me and he was so sweet and kind and he would give me a dollar every time and he would just be – and he would say,

Enjoy it,

You know,

Like he would say it in Farsi.

But I think for me,

Like as you said it now,

I only realized like it made me feel that money was to be shared.

He was never – and by the way,

He'd take like a wad of cash out,

You know,

Like he would – and it came with a blessing always.

So I associated the two actually together at a very young age because he had no – the giving was absolutely with an open hand and an open heart.

Right.

And you can tell that – And the dollar for me was more than a dollar.

I valued it because he cared enough to even – I don't even think I spent.

I don't even know what I did with it.

I probably went to the candy store but,

You know,

I think that that's exactly to your point.

And it says,

For instance,

That if Abraham gave you one penny,

You become a wealthy man because it is the blessing or the energy within the money that is that important.

And if you go through life with a closed heart and a closed hand,

No matter how little or a lot you have,

You unfortunately will not have the blessing within that money.

Yes.

So I just wanted to – in closing this,

I want to quote two people.

Dr.

Diner who wrote The Pursuit of Happiness.

You remember we talked about his book,

Great book.

And he studied happiness and he looked at – people get really tripped up here.

He compared people on the Forbes list of wealthiest Americans with general population and found that they were only slightly happier than average with a whopping 37% being less happy than the average American.

So as the notorious VIG said at best,

Mow money,

Mow problems.

But I do also want to quote David Foster Wallace because,

You know,

I think that he's – I just want to say something because,

You know,

It's related to what we spoke with right in the Kahneman book where he speaks about the fact most people assume once I'm married,

I'll just be much happier.

And in reality,

Studies have shown that people after six or seven years,

They actually wind up being baseline less happy than they were before they got married.

And I think it's also true about money where people have the misconception that if I have more money,

Then I'll be happier.

But in reality,

Like you just said,

That's not the case.

Although it can be the case assuming people follow the – Yeah,

The Forbes list and 37%.

Well,

They follow everything we shared until – Yeah.

So David Foster Wallace,

He said this in relation to money.

In the day-to-day trenches of adult life,

There is actually no such thing as atheism.

There's no such thing as not worshipping.

Everybody worships.

The only choice we get is what to worship.

An outstanding reason for choosing some sort of God or spiritual type thing to worship,

Be it JC or Allah,

Be it Yahweh or the Wiccan mother goddess or the Four Noble Truths or some infragable set of ethical principles is that pretty much anything else you worship will eat you alive.

If you worship money and things,

If they are where you tap real meaning in life,

Then you will never have enough.

You never feel you have enough.

It's the truth.

Worship your own body and beauty and sexual lore and you will always feel ugly.

And when time and age start showing,

You will die a million deaths before they finally plant you.

On one level,

We all know this stuff already.

It's been codified as myths,

Proverbs,

Cliches,

Epigrams,

Parables,

The skeleton of every great story.

The trick is keeping the truth upfront in daily consciousness.

Worship power,

You will feel weak and afraid and you'll need ever more power over others to keep the fear at bay.

Worship your intellect,

Being seen as smart and you'll end up feeling stupid,

A fraud always on the verge of being found out and so on.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

So,

I'd like to share one of the stories,

Letters that we received.

Yay!

I'm not going to smile,

But please keep sending them in because whether or not we actually read them.

Because now Michael is reading them.

No,

But also we are inspired by them all the time.

Well,

You are because you get to read them all the time.

First let me say how grateful I am for you and all the teachers.

As I am on the bus listening to your podcast,

I had to fight back tears.

By the way,

I love when we're like on a bus,

In a car,

In a plane,

In a workout.

It's so fun.

I have a 27 year old son whose schooling was entirely in special education.

The worst picture was painted by the doctors when he was born.

We were told he'd never walk and he may need to be institutionalized.

Our background in African spirituality does not allow us to be swayed negatively.

We tried to apply for services.

It was always denied.

I threw my hands up.

I didn't know what path to take.

When my son graduated with an IEP diploma,

He stated that he didn't want to be labeled.

So I did not push or pursue getting services.

It's nine years since he left school.

My son has been blessed.

Fortunately by our association with great organizations like Include New York City and Best Buddies,

They've helped keep him employed.

I recently had a health scare,

Which forced me to face reality.

What would happen to my son if he weren't here to support him?

Can he provide for himself?

I started the process of having him reevaluated and I've been praying for clarity.

Listening to your podcast,

I realized I have fears that I must overcome.

I've been at the Kabbalah Center for eight years now.

Listening today,

I remembered sitting upstairs when Josh read for his Bar Mitzvah.

During the holidays,

I watched him participate and marvel at his growth.

Josh obviously is surrounded by not only loving,

Caring parents,

But a community who really cares for him.

I hope to feel the same about my son.

I'm praying for a solution and the best outcome.

Wishing you both continuous blessings,

Valinda.

So Valinda,

We send back our blessings and support you and I'm sure that you will find the way to make sure that your son is supported not only now,

But throughout his life.

And to the rest of our listeners,

I really hope that you are again as inspired by Valinda as we are and by all those who have shared their stories.

So continue to send your stories,

Questions,

Comments to MonicaAndMichaelAtKabbalah.

Com.

MonicaAndMichaelAtKabbalah.

Com.

And as always,

Make sure you go to Apple Podcasts,

Write five star reviews,

Share this podcast with as many people as you can.

And I hope you enjoyed listening to this podcast as much as we enjoyed recording it.

Bye.