Is Ego Covering Your True Self?

Satsang Podcast with Sri is Ego Covering Your True Self.

In the yogic system,

The definition of ego is the sense of I,

Often referred to as asmita.

So I can be I alone am the self,

Alone everywhere,

Or I as asmita klesh becomes the problem where you identify as an I separate from the whole.

This then is called ego.

For a human being,

The sense of I am this individual,

This person with a name,

With a form,

With an ability starts to develop as the child grows.

So for the baby lying there in the crib or in the carriage,

Doesn't have a sense of I as separate from my mother,

Separate from the world.

We look into a baby's eyes and that glory is there,

That glory of the true self.

The mind has not yet developed.

So as soon as the mind develops in the human being,

The first thing that comes is I am separate.

I am hungry.

I need food.

I need my mother.

I need security and all that comes with a sense of ego identity.

As the child grows up,

If this ego is weak and there's a sense of insecurity,

If the mother hasn't given the child enough attention or like we see with children that are brought up possibly in orphanages,

That they don't have enough sense of touch or security and they don't have a strong ego sense,

A sense of who they are,

Then this can be problematic.

So in a human being,

We see the development of ego is not a bad thing.

The ego needs to become strong,

Have a sense of identity,

Have a sense that I am okay in this world.

I am secure.

I am capable.

I can achieve those things that I want.

If the ego is weak and doesn't have those strengths,

Then one can become very disturbed.

So we need to start sadhana with a strong sense of ego.

In fact,

It has been shown that people without strong senses of ego are unable to sit and meditate because the mind is too agitated,

Chanchal.

The mind is not in a state where it's balanced enough,

Where there's enough sattva or light in the system to be able to actually sit in silence.

So we don't want to say then that ego is necessarily a bad thing because the strong ego allows you to meditate,

Allows you to now begin to reflect on higher awareness or higher thought as to who you are other than an individual ego,

Mind,

Body,

Consciousness.

The mental institutions might be filled with people who don't have a sense of their own ego and intellect or who have tried to give it up.

And we say that they're mad or crazy.

There's a fine line there because in spiritual practices there's talk about surrendering or giving up your ego.

Or we need to see this in a different light.

Rather than the sense of giving up or surrendering the ego,

We want to see it in the light that the ego now becomes strong but expanded.

So rather than thinking that you're an ego separate,

Asmita klesh,

I am separate from the whole,

Which is avidya or ignorance of the true self,

You're knowing that your ego is the same ego,

The same sense of I that exists in everyone.

So everyone is that same I that you are.

And as no one has ever really seen their I,

Most human beings place the I on the body and say,

I am this body.

But now as a meditator,

The I is placed on the space,

On the consciousness that was there before you started to identify as the I,

Like the little baby.

Another example that's often given is an artist that starts with a pure white canvas and then paints a scene of people,

Houses,

Whatever the painting is.

But underneath all the paint,

Underneath all the images,

Is that pure screen.

Just like in a movie,

The screen is there and all the light images appear on the screen.

So now we're reversing this mistaken idea that I am first as a body,

Mind,

Intellect,

Ego,

And saying I am first as that pure canvas where all these images are superimposed.

So this ego is covering,

Blocking,

Impeding your awareness of your true self,

And that's when ego,

Asmita,

Sense of I,

Becomes klesh,

Becomes problematic,

Because the forgetfulness of the true canvas,

Of the true pure consciousness that you are,

Now becomes the problem.

So in meditation then,

We start from that canvas,

From that self,

First things first,

To know who you are before the ego is superimposed on you.

Then the ego does the work,

The mind now taken on as that painting on the canvas,

Does the work of playing the role of a person,

Individual,

Ego,

Mind,

Intellect,

Strong,

Confident,

Capable in a world of other egos,

To achieve,

To have all the joys of human life.

This is the purpose that the ego has taken on.

But we don't forget the true purpose,

Because the true purpose of existence is to know yourself,

And through that knowledge of self,

Experience the world as an ego-mind body,

But know the ego-mind body is nothing other than you,

The very light of the same self,

Like the images on your TV or your movie screen,

Are the same light on the screen,

Reflected in a different way.

So this is an important observation that the meditator must make,

Because if we say you have to give up the ego,

If we say you have to give up the human being,

Then a fear arises,

Because that is what you've been living,

Possibly your whole life or lifetimes.

So it's not really that you're giving up the ego or giving up being a human being.

What you're giving up is ignorance of your true self,

Because when the knowledge of your true self is there,

Then it's all you,

It's all that self.

There's no ego separate from you,

There's no I separate from you,

There's no body separate from you,

There's no consciousness separate from you,

There's no family member separate from you.

So your love of your family,

Of your friends,

Is enhanced,

Because you know it's just you,

It's that same you that's alone everywhere.

So now you have the knowledge of the whole that you are.

You're not a limited ego,

Mind,

Body,

Personality.

However the life doesn't change that much.

You still get up in the morning and go to the washroom and have your breakfast and talk to your friends and family and do your work or your job and earn your income,

Whatever it is that you do.

This all goes on,

But your perspective has changed.

Now you're knowing that self-realized consciousness that you've always been,

You always are.

We've given the example many times of deep sleep,

Because every night when you're sleeping,

The mind is not there,

The mind is not awake.

So there's no ego there,

There's no body there,

There's no intellect saying it's this way or it's that way or making this conclusion or that conclusion.

You're free.

So now,

When you open the eyes and you begin to see what the eyes compel you to see,

Which is all the forms around you,

First your own bed,

Your own body,

And you say it's separate from you.

So the first sense of separation comes with your own body.

The first sense of attachment comes to your own body.

So once you are attached to your own individual body,

Mind and intellect,

Then you will be attached to all the things that bring happiness,

Pleasure,

Joy to your body,

Mind and intellect.

So you will look to satisfy your senses.

From that very first craving,

Which is hunger to keep the body alive,

Comes all the other desires,

All the other cravings,

To keep the body comfortable,

To keep your environment nice,

To have all the things that you can enjoy.

So there's no problem there.

This is the way the system functions.

But the problem comes in when you get stuck in the system.

We've given the example of driving the car and thinking you're the car,

But you're the driver of the car.

In the same way,

You're the driver,

You're the self that's using this illusory manifestation of your body and all the forms around you that you've created as your light,

Your movie on your screen,

Without forgetfulness of your own true self.

So first things first is always knowledge of yourself,

Which is why our mantra is Amaram Ham Madhuram Ham,

Amaram Ham Madhuram Ham.

I am immortal.

I am blissful.

So rather than immediately identifying with the waking state as you do in the morning and say,

I am this body,

I am Sheri,

I am Chaitanya Sri,

I am this name and form and person,

And this is my life,

And this is where I live,

And this is what my passport says is my nationality,

Rather than that identification immediately,

You're identifying with I am immortal.

I am that self,

Which was never born,

Which never dies.

And when I know that self that I am,

Then I am blissful.

So the ego only covers your true self when you make your ego,

Your I identity,

As separate from you,

The self,

Because the self is forever shining,

Just like the canvas is there behind all the paint on the screen.

You are forever that pure,

Free being.

So the formula is to know pure,

Free forever.

You are.

That's the first things first.

That's the shift that we need to make,

To know who you are,

Who I am,

What all this is first.

And then you don't identify as an ego,

Mind,

Body,

As anything separate,

Because they're not there.

The intellect is dissolved,

The ego is dissolved into the self,

And it's all that self.

Just like when you watch the movie,

You can forget that you're there in the theater watching a movie and become involved so much with the characters that you forget yourself.

You identify as a character in the movie,

Or several characters,

But at the same way,

Or at the same time,

You can remind yourself,

I am the one watching the movie.

I am the knower of the movie.

So it's the same thing that you do with your own life experience.

Remind yourself,

You are the knower.

Am I Ramham?

Madhu Ramham.

I am pure,

I am free,

I am forever,

I am immortal and blissful.

So because so much work and so much practice has gone into saying,

I am an individual,

I am separate,

As the child developed throughout its life,

His or her life,

Into a human being to function in a world,

Because the child is not born capable of functioning.

So this functioning,

This intelligence has to develop.

But with the intelligence,

In an unaware environment,

The child will forget his or her own true nature.

So now,

The practice has to be that intense,

To know your true nature first,

Who you truly are,

Apart from the identification with who you think you are,

Which is a body,

Mind,

Intellect,

Person with a name and form and qualifications.

So you are all that too.

It's not that you need to give any of that up or surrender anything.

Surrender now we take in a different way,

Not to mean giving up,

Instead to mean to know,

To know your true nature,

So that the ego,

Mind,

Intellect becomes absorbed in your true nature.

It's not that it's not there.

It's there in full force,

But with the knowledge that it's all you.

It's all self.

And everyone is that same one self.

So now,

You rest in this awareness.

There's no fear that you have to give up your identity,

Because your identity is of the self and the self includes everything.

So the self includes the sense of individuality that before you believed yourself to be,

The sense of your name and form and your home and where you go and who your loved ones are.

That remains,

But with a different perspective.

It's as if the artist now remembers that the canvas was blank before he or she put the painting on it.

So now,

You remember that you are the self before you created this mind with all the images,

With all the movies that you call your life.

So now,

Remembering of the self is your practice.

And this practice needs to be continually for a long time with the great respect for these efforts,

Because so much practice has gone into believing individual consciousness,

Ego consciousness.

So now,

The practice is the result.

It's not that you practice and someday you will have it.

What we want is to know it right near,

Because it's already there.

It already exists.

You already are pure,

Free forever.

You already are that self that is forever and free and immortal and blissful and totally self-realized.

So self-realization as your true nature is that screen,

That canvas,

That Paramatma,

That highest self that you forever are and is always shining,

Just like the sun is always shining,

But if the ray of the sun shines on the river or the mountains,

We see the river or the mountains and we forget that without the sun we couldn't see it.

So in the same way,

The forgetfulness comes in and you believe yourself to be a separate ego-mind individual,

Forgetting that light of the self,

That if it weren't shining,

You wouldn't even be able to wake up in the morning.

You wouldn't be able to sleep at night.

You wouldn't be able to digest your food.

How does all that happen without your doership?

It's because the self is moving everything.

And when you tune in to that self alone moving and doing everything,

You can rest now in the freedom,

The fulfillment that you are,

Because now your happiness doesn't come from having to fulfill your desires.

If you fulfill a desire,

It's a bonus.

If you don't get what you desire,

You're still pure,

Free forever.

You're still that anan,

That bliss that you are.

So the meditation allows you to become absorbed in that bliss that you are,

Pure,

Free forever,

And then everything else moves from that perspective of bliss and nothing can remove that from you.

Nothing can change that,

Because that bliss of yourself,

That sat-chit-anand,

Pure existence,

Pure consciousness,

Pure bliss,

Is who you are always.

And anything that covers it,

You just now know it's a covering.

It's not separate from you.

And as soon as that covering becomes absorbed,

As soon as your ego-mind intellect is absorbed in that space,

You return to your bliss.

So we keep practicing that meditation on pure consciousness,

Pure bliss,

Pure knower,

And remain forever established as you are.

Om Shanti.

Om Peace.

That peace is there with you always.