Powerful Beings: Building Trust In Yourself Again

Hello everyone,

Today I come here to talk about trust.

One of the most important things we can have with ourselves is a good amount of trust and how I mean by a good amount,

There's a sort of trust that becomes a little bit too much according to where you are working from so if you are over trusting yourself you can be too confident and arrogant or there's the too less trust in yourself or confidence that you just are not so sure of yourself or if you deserve this or if you can actually do this or not so there's this large spectrum that we can play with when we work with our trust in ourselves and I know for a fact that I can go around trusting the universe and trusting God,

Trusting the higher power with everything because obviously that's bigger than us,

That's higher than us,

That's holy,

It's like spirit,

It's beautiful but when we come to ourselves and trust in ourselves there's a lot of friction there and the main reason we have friction is because we have broken our trust sometimes before and we've gained a little bit of difficulty trusting ourselves again and this,

I mean it happened to me so many times obviously as with any human and I'm sure it will still happen and it's just something that we would have to come to terms with and like maybe just have to forgive.

I remember once I had this conversation with my friend and she told me I felt so embarrassed and I felt so embarrassed and you don't understand I was in front of a lot of people,

I was presenting and then I said this word and it was wrong,

It was so wrong and I kept going and people are just laughing and some of them are and you know I felt absurd,

I felt stupid,

I felt belittled,

I felt not confident and I don't know how to come out from that,

I felt so embarrassed,

What should I do?

And the thing is you should learn to trust yourself again.

The reason why that trust is important is because why we do things the way we do them is how much we trust ourselves.

So for instance if I don't forgive that part of me that is a little bit funky that tends to come out from time to time,

Say things that I don't really mean because it's autopilot or do things that really were not my strong suit,

Then I can focus on that and really just say you know what I'm just a bad person,

I'm doomed I can't do this or I can't stop smoking,

I can't quit this behavior because I'm so bad like look at me I've built this trust with myself and I'm not just doing it right,

There's just not something that's working and I'm feeling I snap at myself,

I snap at myself and I hate myself for doing this,

Look at me now,

I'm back to the square not even one,

I'm back to square minus 10 and that's the kind of perception we give ourselves when we just make a mistake,

Go a little bit behind and we don't seem to find it easy to redeem our trust.

So this happened to me as well a couple months ago,

I was going really well with my plan about not binging and you know just eating till I'm full and that's it and never eat because of emotions,

Never eat because of feelings,

I am meant to study all of my feelings and understand them and that's obviously a perfect picture like that's not a human,

That's a robot,

You enter a comment prompt and you end up with a program and that runs your robot but if a human,

We are so uncommon,

We are so complex that we can't just order ourselves around we have to have some feeling to that,

We have to have some compassion.

I found that the sense of guilt that I'm attaching to not accomplishing something or not trusting myself enough was even worse because it pushed me to the lower me,

We both have lower ourselves,

The little ego and then we have the higher self and we tend to grab onto those failures and put them in front of our eyes and really just look at them and be frightened by them,

Disgusted from them because we are having that friction force with the fact that we messed up,

You know,

We did,

We messed up and that's a fact but we are so not accepting it because we're like oh why have I done that,

I know better,

I should have not done that,

I should have and the thing is I also learned that I had to forgive myself feeling guilty,

Ruminating about that,

Remembering that event and just like saying oh no Asma you did this so bad,

You see how you've done that,

You see how you've gone like this,

Why did you do that,

That's not you,

That is not you and then this voice just comes in and like storms in from the window as I closed my doors,

I know that this voice exists and I don't allow that one to come,

Right,

I know that in my strong days I close my doors and my windows but what happens when we've done something wrong and we kind of didn't do our best or try our best in doing something,

We just tend to go the other route like we need that sense of guilt,

Right,

It's good to have it,

You know,

It comes and it goes wow,

I don't feel good because I did this and you know we should just go yeah,

I don't feel good,

Why did I act that way so now I'm becoming curious instead of judgmental,

This is the first clue in order to tackle your past actions,

You just tackle them with a little bit of curiosity because if something happens and it ignites some sense of guilt in you and also a campaign with a sense of I don't think I can trust myself around this anymore then I'm feeling guilty and I'm feeling a little bit of shame,

A little bit of down energy because I haven't risen to my expectations,

Well what ignited that,

That's the first thing,

This again is a self-study,

You enter into your deepest part of yourself and you ask this question well what brought about that action,

That word or that misstep or that misshapen,

What brought it about,

Why did it happen,

Why on that day,

Why after speaking to that person,

Why after you know feeling this certain emotion in the morning,

Maybe I didn't sleep well,

Well we have to also like navigate those things and just brainstorm that,

It's really going to help us get to know ourselves better and prevent other failures in the future so doing a little bit of inventory and keeping that at reach so that when I have like a little diagram that builds up with every single event about myself so I can analyze everything that comes to me so that's the first thing.

The second thing is with trust we have to put something in our trust fund so trust is like love,

Love to yourself and if you don't really participate in that action it won't really happen,

If you don't really do it gradually and incrementally,

Baby steps one day at a time it won't really build itself into a trust so how do we cultivate this trust and for it to not become arrogant so arrogance actually doesn't build up with people who work on themselves and I'm sure that if you are here and listening and you know you're looking up material like this and stuff I don't think you will have a problem with that because a lot of us when we work on ourselves we tend to be quite hard critics on ourselves and we don't lie,

We are very honest and so that's something that I trust you with and I trust myself with as well is that I know my limitations and I know what I can perform but I also don't hesitate to show my strength in areas where I can really shine so having that said when you're working on your trust you've got to make your trust fund you've got to have something like a bank account for trust and then you start to gather your points so for example I went to the bank and this and that and this happened and I feel good about myself because I didn't respond as I used to I responded in this way and now you have an event plus in your trust fund so now I can trust myself more around embarrassment in public because I wasn't really embarrassed when I fell I actually just laughed at myself and I felt so good so I can do this I can trust myself with not feeling embarrassed in front of people whenever I fall again or whenever I do something really funny building your confidence is about remembering your past successes and just celebrating them and also when you have this deep amount of regret or regretful moment a moment where you doubt yourself you kind of use your willpower and this is the trick you sway yourself from feeling like a victim of your own self into feeling powerful and going and revisiting all of the great stuff you've done anything really meaningful for you that you kept on your list of confidence and of trust and you keep coming back to it especially when days are tough and what I like to do with this trust thing is that I actually have it right in front of me and I know it seems funny but I have a confidence arguments ok so I call it my confidence arguments it's arguments that support me when I feel the less confident in my life I know that I can revisit this and feel empowered because I have their literally every single act small gesture or words that I've said in the past that really just were so generous and so confident with me to do and I keep those in front of my eyes and look at them and say I've got this all in me and I know that I can grab to this so again what this does is train us to look at things that are positive about us look at things about ourselves that we can trust instead of you know bringing us down and as humans we are wired focusing on the negativity bias we can learn a new way of adapting to our feelings and our truths and our facts and our trusts so we can actually change the way we view things and that's what we call perception that's basically the whole reason of religions and spirituality is that we no longer look at the world as a bad we just look at it as perfect there's no bad and good let's face it it's just perfect it's here to teach us a lesson it's here to make us learn about ourselves more so having these actually having a list of things that I've done great are connecting me with that beautiful part of me that I can bring forth that I can also entertain nevertheless I still can trust myself around my insecurities around my weaknesses because I'm a human and I'm not I'm not a saint I will still make a mistake someday maybe and I have to be ready to be compassionate with myself when I do that so what is a situation that I've really messed up and I overcame it why because I had a lot of compassion to myself and I forgave myself for that and I chose to see the light in front of me so I can also remind myself of situations like this I can also put this on my trust list you know and that's how I build trust so that when next time something happens I don't even have to look at that list sometimes it just comes to me like whoop wow this is an opportunity for me to exert all of that beautiful trust in me so I will do it and yeah so that's basically it having the courage to forgive ourselves to be really compassionate with ourselves knowing that we are limited and knowing that we are allowed to fail because life is exactly that failure then success then ups and downs but when that happens it all matters how I hold myself how I build my trust fund and how I put all of those things in front of me and remind myself with my power instead of my failures so I really wish that this has helped you in any way and if it did please make a comment and keep coming back for more I love you so much thank you for listening bye bye