Starting Your Journey

Hey everybody and welcome to Own Your Life.

This is the first episode.

I'm your host,

Ben Barber.

And let me just explain a little bit about what the show is.

So we're going to be talking to all sorts of different people and it's mostly going to be interviews.

We're going to talk to coaches and experts and gurus and anybody that can assist you.

And then we're also going to talk to people who just have extraordinary stories because I think everyone does.

So we're going to talk to people about the ways that they've overcome things and how they've taken more ownership over their life.

So today my first guest is one of my very best friends.

He is an international life coach with a wonderful podcast that I also happen to be the producer of Glenn Ambrose.

Glenn,

How the heck are you my friend?

I am doing great.

Wonderful.

Alive.

Yeah.

Woo.

Thank you for being my first guest.

My pleasure.

Of course,

Always,

Anytime.

Nice.

So you are a life coach based in Florida,

But you work with people all over the world.

Can you tell us a little bit about that?

Sure.

It's funny talking to you because you know everything about it,

But for the listeners,

Yes.

My podcast got very popular on a meditation app called Insight Timer and that's really where I started to reach the international audience.

And now it's nice because I was living in Rhode Island with you for,

Well,

Not with you,

But in the state of Rhode Island for 14 years.

And then my son and I moved down to Florida where I enjoy the warm weather.

So I was able to work by phone and Skype and Zoom with people all over the world.

So that's basically my business now,

Along with my book,

Of course,

That just came out.

Right.

Yeah.

Your book,

Down to Earth,

The Spiritual Being's Guide to a Happy Human Experience,

Which is available on Amazon,

Barnes and Noble,

Wherever you get books online.

You can get it paperback or digital.

And it's a wonderful book.

And so let's tell a little bit,

You have a great story of how you got to where you are now because you haven't always been this enlightened life coach following the spiritual journey.

You have a very unique,

Well,

Maybe it's not unique,

But you have a great story of how you got to where you are.

So can you tell us a little bit about that?

Yeah.

You know,

The Reader's Digest version is that I fell in love with alcohol at an early age and ran with that wildly,

Crazily,

And excitingly for 20 years.

And did all kinds of insane stuff and had some fun along the way,

But destroyed myself and a lot of other things along the way.

And by the time I was 30,

Things were getting bad.

I couldn't rationalize my lifestyle much,

Much longer.

So that was kind of the beginning of the end and then I tried to pull myself together and get married,

Have a kid and start a business and buy a house and do everything that everybody told me I should.

And I did.

And I was more unhappy then than I was when I was partying.

So that was a big problem,

Which really induced a spiral.

So then I just really went back into addiction heavy,

Which led me to waking up.

So my particular journey,

There's lots of ways to wake up spiritually.

And my version was through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.

So those steps are there to induce a spiritual awakening,

Which is just the change of perception.

It's just a new way of looking at things.

That's all spiritual experience sounds like,

Ooh,

But it's just a change of perception perspective.

So I started looking at things differently and I saw life in a different way and started interacting with it differently.

And that was really profound in the first few months.

And then it took me several years to understand what had happened to me and how to interact in life and learn a language so I could start helping other people with it.

And yeah,

I guess that's the Reader's Digest version.

And so now how long have you been a life coach now?

I think it's like seven years now that I was doing it.

And I was doing it for years before that,

Non-professionally kind of.

Learning people in AA,

There was a lot of similarities,

Of course,

As differences too.

But I kind of noticed that I was teaching people how to interact with life differently.

And then when I became a life coach,

I saw a lot of similarities to the work.

So I was kind of a life coach in training before I knew that that's what I was going to do.

You also were a personal trainer for a while.

And that's actually how we met.

And we'll get into that in a minute.

But you spent a lot of time in the personal training aspect of things,

Working on more people's outside of the gym situation.

And do you feel like that was a natural segue for you or one of the things where you're working with clients one on one and you find that the conversations are more what you're helping them with than the cardio method?

You know what I mean?

Yeah.

I think I was a personal trainer for,

I don't know,

Maybe 10 years before I woke up and then another five or more after.

And there was before I woke up,

Of course,

There wasn't as much of that.

Although,

I mean,

There was some of it.

I still was able to talk to people in a certain way.

Now knowing what I know now,

When I look back over my entire life,

There's little bread crumbs that I can see now that were invisible to me before.

People used to come to my apartment when I was 18,

19 years old at four o'clock in the morning because they're upset about something to talk to me.

And at that time,

I mean,

I was a mess.

I didn't know why people were coming to talk to me.

But now you look back on that and you go,

Oh,

Well,

Maybe you had this life coaching thing in you back then.

So I mean,

I see little traces of that when I was personal training before.

And then after I woke up,

I got back into it a little bit before I transitioned into life coaching.

And there was a lot of it then.

I mean,

Because it was kind of who I was at that point.

I had opened up to who I was.

So if you were a client of mine,

There was about a 90% chance you were going to get some life coaching during the sessions.

That's the way the conversations flowed.

We're going to talk about everything and anything.

So the deeper the better.

And I know that from experience because so now let's explain a little bit how we know each other.

Since I started off by saying you're one of my very best friends.

So we have known each other for going on eight years.

And I was well,

I'll tell my side first.

So I used to work when I was in high school for the local subway food station in town,

The local subway station,

The local subway restaurant,

Sandwich shop.

And my boss was a great quirky guy who was always trying to think outside the box and whatever.

And he obviously saw that I had a weight problem.

And he also saw that all of the customers loved me.

Like you know,

And I'm not trying to pat myself on the back or anything,

But like people liked my personality and they thought I was funny and whatever.

And he had this idea that because it was after the,

I know that he's not a great person to talk about nowadays,

But this is my life.

But it was after the early success of the Jared subway character,

The weight loss character.

And he was saying,

You know,

That's died down a little.

It's the early to mid 2000s.

That's died down a little.

And he pitched this idea to subway to follow me on a journey.

He would get me a personal trainer and I would eat subway and they would record it and they would be able to like follow my weight loss journey.

And subway was really into the idea.

And they hooked me up with a personal trainer at the YMCA and it was horrible.

Horrible.

It was a horrible experience.

It was really bad.

So it kind of failed.

Fast forward like five years and I saw Doug again.

We were working on some other stuff outside of subway.

I didn't work at subway anymore.

And he said,

Let's try it again.

And we went to another local gym that wasn't as,

You know,

By the books as the YMCA was.

And he went and asked if they had any trainers.

And I was,

At this point,

I was very,

More than you see now.

I was very,

Very bad off.

And I gave in and I said,

Yeah,

I'll try it again.

And they introduced me to Glenn.

Glenn,

Why did you accept?

Because you did not get paid to train me.

I did not pay you to train me and you did not get paid to train me by anybody.

Subway didn't pay you.

I believe like nobody paid you.

You just volunteered to do it.

Right.

I mean,

It's,

You know.

So why?

Well,

I mean,

It's,

It's how things work when you live spiritually.

You know,

I hear this,

A lot of these types of scenarios from my clients and I see it in my own life and I've seen it in your life.

And it's,

You know,

I,

There was like a month before this came about,

I was feeling good.

I,

You know,

I was back into personal training,

Which I would,

I enjoyed to some degree.

I was,

I was looking towards opening my business and heading in that direction.

And I wanted to give back because I was feeling blessed and I was feeling grateful and I had made one of the things I put on a list is I was like,

Well,

I didn't have a lot of money.

So I was like,

Well,

I can give back in time and expertise what I can't give in money.

So I was like,

Well,

I'd like to give back.

So I'd like to train somebody for free that really needs it,

That could benefit it from it,

That can't afford it.

And and I had written that down on a list like a month before and then all of a sudden,

You know,

The subway owner,

Doug comes in and he's like,

He's,

I,

He walks in,

I believe he asked me,

He said,

Hey,

I'm Doug from subway and I want to talk to somebody about getting a free membership for someone.

Can I talk to the manager?

And I went and grabbed the manager and I was like,

And he says,

Yeah,

And he gives just a brief overview.

And I said,

Hey,

Can I,

And immediately it reminded me of what I put on the list.

So I was like,

Hey,

Can I sit into the meeting with you guys and listen?

And they were like,

Sure.

So I sat down next to Doug and Doug explained to the manager what they were going to do.

And the manager was like,

Yeah,

Well,

You know,

We should be able to make this happen.

Let me check with the bosses.

You know,

We should be able to give them a free membership.

And when I was done hearing your story,

I was like,

I'll train them for free.

And they were like,

What?

I was like,

I've been asking for,

This is exactly what I asked for.

I said,

I'll train them for free.

So they're like,

Okay,

Great.

So that,

That was,

You know,

That's how it fell into place.

Right.

And then,

You know,

And then we,

We became fast friends and how,

Like,

How much different would you say I am now than I was then?

Because I don't like,

Yeah,

It's kind of those things where like,

You,

Maybe you don't remember everything of,

Of like a dark period in your life.

Like,

You're,

You know,

Your brain kind of maybe shut some of that out for,

For good reason.

So like,

What are,

What are some of the differences you've seen?

And I don't mean this as a,

As a testimonial for me,

But more so like it's directly because of the work that I've done with you.

So,

So like,

In what ways,

How do you think that that has changed in the last eight years?

Well,

You know,

One way we're still working on is you to be able to receive compliments.

So that's impossible.

You might as well just give up on that.

No,

No,

That's not happening.

So,

So no,

It's,

I mean,

In,

In every way,

I mean,

You know,

Like the,

I remember,

And I think I remember it so well,

Perhaps because you remember it and we've talked about it before.

And it was,

You know,

Our first conversation was sitting down,

You know,

Not even working out and just sitting down and going,

Okay,

So,

You know,

You can lose the way,

But it's not about that.

It's about who you become in the process.

And it's about the internal changes.

That's what's important because if you bust your ass and hit some weight goal,

That's going to be really good.

But if you don't change on the inside,

Then you're just going to put it back on or you're not going to be happy or it's,

You know,

It's all about changing the inside and then the outside will follow.

Or doing them at the same time,

Whatever it's,

But you have to change the inside.

So,

And that's what I've seen,

You know,

And I've seen the outside follow too.

I mean,

You've lost a dramatic amount of weight,

But the changes inside are even more profound,

Which is why I know that you're going to continue having success in the weight loss journey and whatever other journey you have.

And it's,

You know,

So I see the,

There's a whole new level of confidence in yourself that you didn't have before.

You take more action.

You know,

You've had,

You had all the qualities back then,

But you weren't confident enough in yourself to go do it or you didn't think it was possible or,

You know,

So it's the whole perspective shift about I can do this and you know,

Your business has grown dramatically and you've helped a lot of people in their businesses and it's,

You know,

And all the different projects you've handled,

The different things that have been happening.

I mean,

You know,

When we first met,

I don't know exactly what was going on in your life,

But it wasn't much,

You know,

Like,

I mean,

It wasn't much,

You know,

You didn't have all these business things going on.

You didn't have all these personal lives things going on.

You would just kind of maintaining and I've seen you over the last eight years handled just about everything life has to throw,

Handle it well and expand emotionally,

Mentally,

Spiritually business wise into a much more capable,

Confident person that,

You know,

And now I think it's just,

You needed to get to this point for you to really be able to take off.

So like,

I know that this is just stage one,

Like this is just you getting prepared to launch off into what you're really capable of and that's what I've seen you do.

Well,

Thank you very much and I owe a lot of that to you.

So thank you.

What are some of the,

So you've had,

You know,

Tons of clients over the years and all sorts of different people,

You know,

Different,

Literally different nationalities,

Like from all over the world.

What are some of the commonalities of things that people struggle with?

Like you know,

Are there themes that come up over and over and over again,

No matter who the person,

Where they're from,

You know,

Gender?

Yeah,

All of them.

Yeah.

Everything's the same.

There are no differences.

Out with what we struggle with,

I mean,

There are no differences.

There's literally zero cultural difference of anyone in any place around the world.

Because what we really struggle with is underneath,

You know,

The cultural differences that we see are on the surface.

So like,

You know,

If you,

You know,

I can't think of a real good example,

So I'll use a foolish one.

So you know,

Like,

So if somebody is,

You know,

Having a weight issue,

Let's say,

And they're in the United States and they're eating too much,

Too many cheeseburgers,

And then somebody in France is eating too many baguettes,

It doesn't matter.

That's not the problem.

It's not the food you're eating.

It's what,

You know,

It's what's causing the problem.

So and that's where we're all the same.

So there are no differences culturally underneath the things,

You know,

People don't,

You know,

The insecurities that people deal with not feeling good enough.

The foundation of what the problems are,

Are universal,

Because,

You know,

We're more alike than we are different.

You know,

When you really look at things,

And the only time we don't see that is if we're looking at a bunch of surface stuff.

Which is just symptoms of what's going on underneath.

If we get underneath all the surface crap,

There are no differences.

I have two more questions.

They're both kind of broad.

One is,

And I would love for you to,

If you would,

Come back sometimes so that we can talk about a specific topic for a little bit,

You know,

To sort of help more people.

But so two questions.

The first one is,

What would be,

If somebody is trying to take ownership over their life,

If somebody is trying to improve their life,

What would be your first step,

The first baby step to try to get them?

Like what should they do right now if they have no idea and they're just trying to grab a foothold?

Probably has something to do with self-love.

Because if we're not confident that we can do something,

That's self-love.

If our brain isn't looking and seeing options of what to do,

Then it's probably a sabotaging because of lack of self-love.

Like a lot of it comes back to self-love.

So I think the quickest way you can address that is just,

One of the fastest ways you can shift anything to a better perspective is just gratitude.

Just practice gratitude.

Just start a gratitude list.

Write a list of five things you're grateful for every day.

And what happens is it starts changing the way you look at the world and you start looking for things to be grateful for.

You start feeling more grateful and more happy.

And then more things to be grateful for tend to come to you and you start chasing them more and hope blossoms.

It can kind of snowball into all kinds of different areas.

I think that that's one of the foundational things.

Just start a gratitude list.

And what is something that you perceived at the time as a failure that you ended up learning a lot from?

Because I really want to take whatever I have somebody that has any level of success or position of helping other people on the show or anybody,

I really want to highlight the fact that when stuff gets really bad,

There's more than likely still going to be a tomorrow.

And that we don't see what's ahead of us when we're in the bad spot.

So I know that there have been rough times for everybody.

So what's a rough time that you thought was a failure or you thought was something that you weren't going to come out of that you ended up being a blessing?

Everything.

That's my whole life.

See the first five minutes of the podcast.

Yeah,

I mean,

I was a disaster for 20 years.

So that kind of counts.

And then that's the beauty of it is the shift of perspective.

It's what I perceived as a problem and suffering and trouble for 20 years turned out to be my biggest assets when I opened up.

So that's the whole thing.

It's our perspective.

If we use our difficulties and the reality,

Because you're right,

We are going to be on the other side of them.

And that's usually when we fall into difficulties,

We just,

And we focus on it and Oh my God,

It's horrible.

Not only is it horrible,

But we have a hard time seeing our way out of it.

And we have to put a little distance and regain that perspective.

And I mean,

The reality is there is going to be a tomorrow and we live in an ever changing world.

That's how you fell into your crap in the first place.

Because there was a time when you weren't in it and now you're in it.

So that means things change.

So if they changed in a way that you could land in it,

That means that eventually they're going to change where you're going to land out of it.

And it's going to speed up if your eyes are looking for that.

If your eyes aren't even looking for it and you're wallowing and how much it's horrible that you're in it and you're not even bothering to look for the ladder that's right next to you to climb out of it,

Well then you're probably going to stay there longer.

So understanding that things change,

You can find your way out of it.

But everything turned into a blessing.

I mean,

My podcast is one of the things that has helped my business the most.

It's the thing that has helped my business the most.

And we were doing that for what,

Three years and nobody was listening.

I mean,

Nine people maybe.

It was like 35.

35 on a good month.

I mean,

Come on.

So like,

But what it was was when I shifted my business and I was deciding what I was going to continue doing and what I didn't want to do anymore,

I looked at the podcast and it's like,

Well,

This is not,

It takes time.

I'm not making any money.

Nobody's listening to it.

It's not benefiting my business whatsoever.

So do I want to keep doing this?

And if I just looked at it from that perspective,

The answer would have been no.

But I was like,

Well,

Do you enjoy it?

Yes.

Okay.

So I kept doing it and then it turned into the biggest blessing.

So it was a failure in terms of a podcast for a while,

But I kept doing it because it was joyful.

And then it turned into something and I think it was probably slow.

You know,

What probably helped out was slowing down and really focusing on the gratitude and a joy of doing it.

Like,

Yeah,

This is fun.

I like doing this.

Oh,

And that's just,

You know,

When you put your attention on that,

It expands the aspect of it being fun.

Then it's more fun than all of a sudden it takes off.

Awesome.

I love it.

So check that out if you want to.

It's called Life Lessons and Laughter with Glenn Ambrose.

It's celebrating its sixth anniversary this month,

Which is pretty cool.

It's every other Sunday.

There's like 160 something episodes,

170 episodes of it.

And I'm on the show too.

I'm Glenn's cohost for all,

But like maybe one or two episodes that Dave stepped in for at the beginning.

And that's great.

GlennAmbrose.

Com if you're interested in life coaching services,

You have a Mindful Mondays blog,

You have Five Questions with Glenn,

Which is a ridiculously fun show for everybody on the email list.

Your book,

You can find all of that information at GlennAmbrose.

Com.

There's so many things that we have that you can,

That,

You know,

Glenn's everywhere.

So follow him on social media at Glenn Ambrose,

Everywhere you can find.

Thanks man so much.

My pleasure.

Thanks for having me.

Good luck with the podcast.

Thank you.

All right.

We'll talk to you soon.

All right.

Safe interns,

Happy Uh,