When Fear Follows You Into Sleep: Exploring Fear In Dreams

Hello there,

Brenton here.

With Scorpio season upon us,

I wanted to talk a little about fear.

Particularly those chronic thinking patterns that solidify into anxieties that can eventually follow us into sleep.

Nightmares plague between 2 and 8% of adults,

Sometimes to the point of sleeplessness.

What's more,

New research shows that the deep levels of sleep associated with active dreaming are crucial to the brain's health as we age.

So the more time we spend in deep sleep and REM sleep,

The less likely we are to develop dementia later on.

It's interesting that dreams aren't widely valued or discussed in Western society today.

In fact,

We still don't even know why we dream,

And yet everyone dreams,

Whether they recall them or not.

For thousands of years,

People in the Americas,

In Australia,

And in Tibet have used their dreams for profound spiritual growth and insight.

From large-scale decisions to personal transformation,

We learned a long time ago to dream our way into a collective inner source of wisdom.

And while there are many ways to understand,

Experience,

And work with dreams,

You can gain incredible insight by approaching them in a symbolic,

Reflective way.

From this metaphysical perspective,

You can think of dreams as stories that originate from the inner,

Intuitive part of you called subconscious mind.

When you go to sleep each night,

Your subconscious mind,

And Jung referred to it as the unconscious,

It offers reflection in the form of dreams to your conscious waking mind.

When you learn to see dreams as such,

You gain invaluable insight into your thoughts,

Feelings,

Limitations,

Strengths,

And more.

I tend to work with dream interpretation from an approach that includes Freud's backward thinking and Jung's forward thinking philosophies,

Seeing dreams as a snapshot of consciousness delivered through symbolic images,

A short story that reveals your story,

Or at least the one you've been telling yourself.

The school of metaphysics,

Where I studied and worked with dreams,

Called this the universal language of mind.

While it's absolutely true that the media and content you put into your brain and mind will influence the images in your dreams,

There's a subtle intelligence underlying dream messages that reveals itself with patience and practice.

When we work with fear,

Either awake or asleep,

We're often working with that which we don't understand and therefore tend to push away.

What we experience when our imagination runs wild with fear is the same physiological,

Fear-based nervous system response that we developed when we faced saber-toothed tigers thousands of years ago.

In other words,

Our nervous system and fight-or-flight responses don't distinguish between imagined fears and actual danger.

And most of us have learned to normalize a state of being that is both under-rested and imbalanced.

The fear centers in our brains actually grow larger due to their repeated use,

So even changing becomes just a little more challenging.

So,

Before we know it,

We've got ourselves into a pickle of a situation where our brains literally make it easy to worry and reach for fear.

And so we find ourselves worrying and anxious about the future and imagining what we don't want to happen,

And then our nervous systems react,

Reinforcing the whole pattern again.

And it's about this stage,

When fear and worry and anxiety become habit patterns,

That they start to show up as uncomfortable,

But they're still there.

And they start to show up as uncomfortable dreams and nightmares.

And this is why giving ourselves permission to pause,

To rest,

To be,

Is so important in our fast-moving,

Multitasking world.

If you do find yourself experiencing uncomfortable dreams or nightmares,

Though,

There are some things that you can do to help.

Number one is get adequate sleep.

Research continues to show that restful sleep is important for health and longevity,

Including mental and emotional health.

Reducing caffeine,

Alcohol,

And technology before bed and then again upon waking will help you become more present in your body and aid you in your transition into and out of sleep.

You might even try sleeping with your phone off or in another room and eliminating caffeine after noon,

As it tends to disrupt that deep sleep cycle.

Number two,

Practice conscious relaxation throughout the day.

Even if you don't have a regular exercise or meditative practice,

You can pause for 60 seconds a few times every day.

Set an alarm on your phone or watch to help you remember when to do it and see if you can focus only on your breathing for the extent of your pause.

With practice,

You'll find yourself calmer and more present,

Both awake and asleep.

So let's take 30 seconds now and just pause.

Did you notice your mind moving to the future?

Were there bits of fear there?

No judgment,

Just checking in.

Number three is listen to your dreams.

Listening and responding to your nightly dreams is a profound exercise in awareness and authenticity.

And when we work with our dreams symbolically,

Especially over time,

We can start to realize that we're not just talking about the past.

We're talking about the future.

And when we're working with our dreams symbolically,

Especially over time,

We stand to discover aspects of ourselves that normally fly beneath even the most conscious radar.

While I'm a firm believer that everyone is their own best dream interpreter,

Here's some insight into some of the most common reasons we find ourselves in nightmares during dream time.

Nightmares of being chased.

Often not being able to run fast enough or feeling like your feet are too heavy to move quickly.

It usually means that you're running from something in your waking life that might be weighing you down.

The question you might contemplate is are there situations,

Conversations,

Or other things that I know I need to address but don't because they're difficult?

In the dream state,

If you can gain a little control,

You might just stop running in the dream,

Take a deep breath,

Turn around to face whatever might be following you.

There's nearly a 100% chance that it's not as scary when you face it.

And then you'll have the insight for what to address when you're awake.

Now when awake,

You might have a hunch as to what your dreams are telling you you're avoiding.

So you can take action today,

Now.

Even a small step,

As uncomfortable as it might be,

Will pave the way for inspiration in the days to come.

And keep in mind,

If you avoid something for too long,

Your dreams might start to include zombies.

Dreams about death,

Dying,

And the end of the world.

Though it can be frightening,

Death represents something that's usually quite beneficial.

Transformation,

Change.

If you dream of the end of the world or a lot of death,

It means you're undergoing a lot of change in your life and it probably feels overwhelming.

So pay attention to your feelings about it,

Both in the dream and when you wake up.

Whether it's happening to you or if it's happening by choice.

Something you might contemplate is,

Does life and my current situation feel like it's happening to me?

Or does change feel forced?

In the dream state,

See if you can pause the dream long enough to give you an opportunity to reflect on who's dying and why.

If there are people that represent qualities within you that you're ready to release,

You can use your dream to consciously upgrade your personality and purge those unproductive beliefs.

If you can calm your emotions in the dream first,

You might glean insight into the way you handle change.

As a waking suggestion,

You can identify goals or milestones related to your life.

Your desires,

Your passions,

The things you enjoy doing,

And then again take action.

Change can be incredibly freeing,

Especially if you're the driving force behind it.

Nightmares in a haunted house or scary building.

Houses and buildings can represent your state of mind.

While most people are unconscious to the thoughts zooming through their minds on a daily basis,

Those thoughts eventually become attitudes and beliefs.

If you're dreaming about scary haunted houses,

It often indicates that you're focused on fear.

A question you might contemplate is,

How often do I think about what I don't want to happen?

Perhaps instead of how good it feels to have accomplished something I desire or how I can attain those desires?

Or perhaps,

What is keeping me from accepting and enjoying right now just because I'm not happy with it?

In the dream state,

You might try leaving the house or the building.

Slow down and calmly focus on the front door,

And as you approach it or when it manifests,

Make the conscious choice to leave the building behind.

You might even consider locking the door behind you as you leave.

As a waking suggestion,

Check in with the thoughts zooming through your head at various points throughout the day.

As you become more aware of the type of thoughts running through your mind,

You'll learn to start focusing on the ones that bring a sense of peace and gratitude,

Rather than fear or unworthiness.

And note,

Monsters or aliens in dreams often represent a similar consciousness of fear.

So,

If those kinds of things are showing up in the dream state,

It might be time to get out of your imagination and into grounded acceptance.

Dreams of vampires.

The vampires are similar to other monsters in dreams.

They represent a slightly different role,

And yes,

It's because of the blood thing.

So,

In a dream,

Blood often represents a similar consciousness to fear.

If you dream about Dracula drinking you for dinner,

It means your choices and experiences are draining you of energy,

Of motivation,

Of enthusiasm,

Maybe more.

So,

If you're dreaming about Dracula drinking you for dinner,

It means your choices and experiences are draining you of energy,

Of motivation,

Of enthusiasm,

Maybe more.

A question you might contemplate is what kinds of things make me feel alive and energetic versus what makes me feel lethargic and bored?

How often do I live and act toward each end of that spectrum?

In the dream state,

You can start consciously intentionally breathing.

It'll help you gain control enough to wake yourself up or change the direction of the dream story.

Breath is very connected with life force.

So,

As you practice in the dream state,

You'll actually be able to control your life.

If there's a window nearby,

You can also open it and let in sunlight or even just turn on a light,

Since the awareness that light symbolizes is what banishes fear of the unknown.

As a waking state,

You can start consciously intentionally breathing.

It'll help you gain control enough to wake yourself up or change the direction of the dream story.

Breath is very connected with life force.

So,

As you practice in the dream state,

You can also open it and let in sunlight or even just turn on a light,

Since the awareness that light symbolizes is what banishes fear of the unknown.

As a waking suggestion,

You could make a list of five things that you're passionate about,

That you care about,

That energize you,

Or that give you purpose.

The first thing you need to know is that your brain is already doing them.

The visualization alone is enough to engage new parts of your brain,

And you'll start to see the ways that everyday habits may be draining your sense of inspiration and fun.

Life is too short to be a vampire snack every night,

Right?

And quick note,

If you do dream about teeth falling out because it is very common,

It can just mean that you're learning something new and it feels challenging trying to assimilate it all.

And that's not the end of the world.

You're learning new things.

Don't worry,

Your teeth aren't going anywhere in the dream will stop when you get the hang of your new gig.

Working with fear isn't always easy or comfortable,

Because it points to aspects of our suffering.

And yet the walk through shadow is the only real path to the light.

And with the little bit of thinking,

Head centered control we've adopted we'll get better at pausing and then sustaining that space without rushing to fill it because we're afraid of what we can't see or control or predict.

And we'll learn to relax into the vast space of interbeing the formless,

Ego-less stream of immeasurable joy and compassion within and around us all.

So next time you find yourself working with fear on your cushion,

You might just ask,

Who is afraid?

With practice,

Your dreams might even reveal the answer.

Or better yet,

The next question.

Until next time,

Happy dreaming.

Thank you.

Gratitude.