Who Am I? The Key Spiritual Inquiry (Live: Replay No. 3)

So welcome everybody and happy new year to you.

Thank you for that greeting,

Patti.

Just say hello to the people I can see have commented.

So that's Patti,

David,

Dee and Kasper and anybody else who's watching wherever you are in the world.

It should be new year everywhere by now,

I guess.

So yeah,

Welcome to this.

This is the third live stream on Insight Timer,

But the first of 11,

11 part self-realization program on Insight Timer.

And I'm calling this one,

Who Am I?

And we've been looking at that in a little bit in the precursor streams.

And if you happen to miss those,

Which were on the 22nd and 29th of December,

All is not lost because in discussion with Insight Timer,

What I've managed to do is download or create an audio file for those.

And we've agreed that we can put those audios onto my profile on Insight Timer.

So if you wanted to catch up on those,

They should start becoming available from mid January when Insight Timer finishes its holiday season break.

So this one's going to continue that theme.

We've got 11 different areas covering various aspects of self-realization over the coming six weeks or so,

Twice a week,

Saturdays and Wednesdays.

And so this is the first of the 11 part series.

So welcome to that.

And just to say right at the outset on behalf of Insight Timer,

All donations that are sent are very,

Very helpful to support the app of Insight Timer,

But also myself in sharing the work worldwide.

So thank you for those.

They're really appreciated.

Just to emphasize also that at any point in this program,

I invite questions in the comments boxes and I'll try to keep an eye out for those and come to those appropriate points.

So if you do have any spiritual inquiry questions about your self-realization journey or spiritual journey issue that you're facing in life,

Then do ask them and we'll pick up on those because questions are very,

Very helpful to not only to yourself,

But also to other participants.

So just kicking off on the whole program,

I think what I wanted to just share from the outset,

I just shared an email with some of the people who follow up and following this work for some time now.

And in that I was speaking about really what I referred to as seismic change that we've experienced in the world throughout 2020 and 2021,

Which has just finished no different.

And really,

If you have gone back a couple of years,

Who could have predicted what was about to unfold for humanity?

And I think pretty much just about everybody on the planet,

Unless you were perhaps in a remote,

Undiscovered tribe in the Amazon,

Has been touched by the events of the last couple of years.

And early in 2020,

I referred to this as this earthquake,

A shift in consciousness,

Which is why I use the term seismic change.

All of it is part of an ongoing process that is happening planetary-wide and is certainly impacting upon the spiritual journeys of so many,

And indeed has caused a lot of suffering.

So the question I was posing in the email is,

Well,

How can we remain at peace,

Experience true joy and love with so much change,

But ongoing in the world?

And the answer to that is really about what this program is all about.

It's about discovering or realising,

As in the term self-realising,

That which is unchanging.

That which is unchanging.

And not only is it unchanging,

It's actually unblemished,

Unmoved and untouched,

Perfect,

Whole and complete,

Irrespective of the events unfolding in our physical domain.

So the question is,

Well,

What is that then that's unchanging?

And the answer actually is remarkably simple and profound and life-changing.

It is in truth you.

Now,

I don't mean you as the personal idea of who you are,

This body-mind complex,

Which you've had for 20,

30,

40,

50,

60 years or more.

No,

I don't mean that.

I mean the true essence of that which you are,

Which I will refer to throughout this series by a number of titles.

Infinite silence,

Which is how it emerged in the realisation here.

Infinite consciousness or infinite awareness or the absolute is another term that I might also use.

So self-realisation is about realising that and that when it is realised,

It is seen as recognised as that which you have always been and always will be.

Even though in this human experience right now,

It looks like most of us have forgotten that.

And that's OK.

There's nothing wrong with that.

We're all here to realise this unchanging essence,

The infinite silence.

And it's for that reason,

This question which I've touched upon in a couple of different ways in the two precursor streams,

Who am I?

Who am I?

Is actually the fundamental question when it comes to spiritual self-realisation or enlightenment or whatever label you want to give it.

Really,

Ultimately,

It's actually the only question in the end.

But there are many different aspects that come from our inquiry questions.

And when we open to exploring that question fully,

Then we can start to take some leaps and bounds upon our spiritual journey.

And that really is the key question,

Because all of the struggles,

The suffering and so forth that we experience and have experienced in our lives,

Come from what I call a case of mistaken identity.

A case of mistaken identity.

And that case of mistaken identity is,

I'll also refer to as the belief that all you are is this body mind.

Because right from the moment you were born,

And in truth,

Even whilst in the womb,

Conditioning has been taking place to support that belief that this is all you are,

This physical body of flesh and bone and the experience of what we call mind.

But it turns out there's much more to that which you are than this.

This body mind is a vehicle through which you get to experience life and life itself,

It will be seen,

Is in fact eternal.

And you are that.

And that's what the infinite silence is.

And as I've said already a few times on the precursor streams,

None of this that I'm sharing over the next six weeks,

Twice a week,

Saturdays and Wednesdays,

Is about believing anything I say about it.

It has nothing to do with belief.

And in fact,

I've got a stream,

In fact I think the very next stream on Wednesday is called Beyond Belief.

So it's not to do with belief,

It's about realising.

It's about realising because as it is realised,

As it is seen,

As it is recognised,

It will be seen unequivocally and clearly that actually belief plays no part in spiritual self-realisation.

It is,

As I sometimes say,

Unbelievable or beyond belief or before and beyond belief.

So we'll be looking in depth,

As I say,

In the next session about why belief is actually the central block to spiritual self-realisation.

But for now,

It's not about believing,

It's about being open from your heart,

Not just the physical heart,

But that connection that that has to the infinite awareness or the infinite silence of the universe.

So this is all about being open to that which is ever present.

And this awareness as it arises and as it is realised,

It is seen that actually in truth,

In truth,

It never actually went anywhere.

We just missed it because we got away from the moment we're being born into believing that we're this flesh and bone,

That you are your name,

Maybe your sex,

Your nationality,

Whatever labels people have given you.

And whilst those have uses at the human level,

It turns out that in the end,

They have actually nothing to do with that which you truly are.

And again,

Just to emphasise,

You don't need to believe me on that.

It will be seen.

It will be seen.

And you might be wondering as I'm talking about moving beyond belief,

What is it then that we're replacing that with if we're not believing in this idea of this identity which actually is very limited.

But the great starting point on that is actually trust.

And that's a trust in the knowingness,

Not the knowledge,

But the knowingness that arises from within,

From the heart,

Trusting the calling of your heart.

If you follow that to its natural,

Shall we say,

Conclusion,

The inevitability of that is that ultimately the realisation of the self as infinite awareness or infinite silence.

And for those of you who may have watched some of the material on the profile on Insight Timer,

Actually the very first thing I uploaded,

I think it was probably about three years ago now,

And hadn't done a lot since then until recently,

Is a short video.

And I'm going to recommend that you have a look at that.

It's called trusting and daring not to.

Not right now,

But you can look at that between the streams.

It's called trusting and daring not to.

And actually when I shared it,

Really it impacted quite a lot of people very profoundly.

It's only five minutes and it's based on a discussion,

A one to one that I was actually having with somebody who came to a seeing about what their heart was calling them to.

And it turns out that actually the highest form of trust is actually not having to trust at all.

Let me say that again,

The highest form of trust is not having to trust at all.

It becomes a natural and intrinsic knowing that arises effortlessly from the silence of the heart space.

So we're moving from belief to trust.

Trust in that which is unchanging and the perfume arising from that is wisdom of such profundity and life changing power that actually,

As it is realised,

You will see that that in fact is why you came here.

So back to the title here,

Who am I?

If you were to answer that,

We'll do the exercise again in a while because the whole thing about self-realisation,

We've been conditioned over many years,

20,

30,

40,

And actually self-realisation about unpacking,

Dissolving all of that which we've thought and believed that we are to realising the truth of that which we actually are.

So repetition in the context of self-realisation of the meditative exercises that I'm pointing you towards is actually fundamental.

So keep on asking this question,

Who am I?

Really,

Or just Who am I?

Again and again and again and again and again.

Not accepting the answers which mind is going to come up with,

Which vary from simply your identity as a woman or a man or a role like a mother or a father or a nationality or a job or any of the number of things that mind will come up with as the answer to that question.

None of those are actually true in the context of self-realisation.

They may be roles that you have and they're important in the human domain,

But they're not actually true about who you are.

So the question we're always bearing in mind when it comes to self-realisation,

The realisation of that which you truly are,

Is the answer to that question and the resolution of the answer to that question.

We're on New Year's Day now and people talk a lot about resolutions.

And my invitation here or the invitation of your heart,

Not specifically me,

Is to move from a resolution to a realisation.

A realisation is simply,

Oh my gosh,

You've had a realisation in your life,

You've had realisations,

I've just realised something.

This realisation is universal,

Unmissable and so profound when it is seen,

It's like the greatest oh my gosh moment in the universe and you don't again need to believe me on that.

So that's why this phrase and this meditation that I will use,

The who am I part of meditation,

And the infinite silence meditation which emerged as part of the realisation,

We will do those in various different ways over the next six weeks to get you to start to unpack,

To remove or dissolve some of the layers of identity and conditioning which you will see have actually been limiting who you are.

And it's like we carry them around as baggage,

Spiritual baggage,

Spiritual and energetic baggage which actually becomes the cause of our suffering because essentially with beliefs we become our beliefs.

And beliefs are limitations on that which you are and that which you truly are is infinite.

So this question is very,

Very,

Very,

Very,

Very important.

So we'll be looking at that in so many different ways and from so many different angles.

Another important point to make at the outset here,

One of the things that's highly prized in the human domain is the increase in human knowledge.

And in fact,

Pretty much around the world most of our education system is really about knowledge acquisition and indeed creating new knowledge.

And it's not a bad thing.

Interestingly though,

In as far as spiritual self-realisation is concerned,

Knowledge actually is a limitation.

That might sound like a really strange thing for me to say,

But knowledge is a limitation because if you think you know the answer to the question of who am I,

In truth I can tell you for free you don't.

Because this is the big difference between knowledge and what I will call knowing.

The difference between knowledge,

Which has limitations,

And knowing,

Which is unlimited.

Knowing is unlimited,

It is boundless.

And it is from the knowingness of the universe,

The intrinsic wisdom imbued into the universe that we all actually have access to if we get out of our heads and open to the silence within our hearts.

Then we move from knowledge to knowing and that is central also to the self-realisation journey.

We have no idea who we really are at the mental level,

Yet the knowingness when we have the humility and humbleness to accept that,

Then in this space,

This very open space,

The knowingness can in fact create the space for which that perfume,

That knowingness to arise.

So it's not that knowledge is bad,

It's just that we need to recognise that whilst we may be the most knowledgeable and widely read person on the planet,

Ultimately that is not going to bring us to the realisation of the self,

Only that awareness itself.

The arising of that naturally will dissolve all of the identity,

All of the thoughts and beliefs that we have about who we are,

To bring forth the arising of the knowingness.

And actually it turns out knowledge,

That which we're so used to learning and studying,

Is actually simply an expression of the knowingness.

You know,

I watched a programme recently here in the UK on,

I think it was BBC television,

About an Indian mathematician whose name escapes me right now,

Who ended up coming from India to Cambridge University,

A world-renowned university here in the UK.

And he was brought,

Because he was a very spiritual person and had been brought up in the Indian great history in spirituality,

And he connected through meditation,

And he brought forth endless insights into the field of mathematics that actually blew away the professors in Cambridge University,

A world-renowned university of hundreds of years,

Could not believe the insights that this guy would just come up with.

He'd simply know the answers and two mathematical problems,

Come up with the most complex theories that eventually all,

And people are still to this day working on some of the proofs of some of those things he came up with.

All of that came through his meditative connections to the universe.

And actually it turns out all great scientific discoveries,

Whilst people may go on through an expression and a journey of experimenting and so forth,

Actually the true insights come in those moments of silence and stillness.

And for the people here on Insight Timer who are all meditators,

I'm sure you've all had that moment,

Whether it be in the shower,

There's a quiet moment and an insight arises,

Or you're in meditation and the most profound insight or spiritual experience starts to arrive.

Where has that come from?

It has come from within.

It's not personal to you,

It's just simply arisen from this field of knowingness,

This infinite awareness or this infinite silence.

So we're making the journey from knowledge and the limited idea of who we are through to knowingness.

And this infinite silence,

It turns out,

Is simply an infinite field of awareness that recognises itself as that.

It recognises itself as awareness.

That's all.

And then everything else,

Form,

Beingness and so forth,

And all the phenomena are simply expressions of that that ultimately return to that.

Everything is a vibration that returns to silence.

So this is all setting up a context for this programme and giving you some initial profound pointings to the realisation.

So we're making that journey from thinking and believing that we know ourselves to be this limited identity through to the recognition,

The realisation that in fact we are infinite silence or infinite awareness.

So what I want to do now is to kind of stop talking for a moment and just do another little take on a meditation exercise just to see,

Help you and perhaps we'll get some responses to this if people want to pop them in the comments when we've done it.

It's a slightly different version of the Who Am I meditation.

If you've watched the prior two streams,

We will do that again shortly because it's worth repeating endless times.

But I've done this one with people as well.

And I would just like to try it with you all now just to see and give you another angle of approach with regard to this idea of moving from knowledge to knowingness.

And actually,

I'm going to express it as a question in this simple and very short meditation.

So what I would suggest you do is get yourself comfortable.

Just close your eyes.

And as you close your eyes,

Just recognising the phenomena here in your body.

The breath,

Any feelings,

Emotions,

Sensations and just accepting they're there.

Have no judgment about any of them.

Just simply and silently observing.

And as you do that,

Just watching silently.

Just be open to this question inside.

What if I knew nothing?

What if I know nothing?

Just resting with that.

Just being open to that as a possibility.

What if I know nothing?

And just seeing if anything emerges there.

Whether you observe anything,

Whether any clarity or insight or emotion or sensation arises.

What if I know nothing?

Good.

So whenever you're ready,

You can open your eyes.

And perhaps share like Patty has just done in the comments what emerged for you,

If anything.

And if nothing came,

That's fine,

Don't worry.

We've got the next six weeks to continue exploring this.

Perhaps just share what came for you there.

I'll just respond to Alicia,

Who's just joined us a little bit late,

And Mark.

So thank you for your comments.

And Louise,

I do know where Auden sure is.

You must have picked up on my Manchester accent.

So,

Yeah,

I've got Manchester born and bred.

So Patty said,

Calmness and serenity.

Fantastic.

A calmness and serenity arose from being open to knowing nothing.

I'm going to say more about that relief,

Bianca.

Fantastic.

I'm delighted to hear that you felt a sense of relief.

Again,

I'm going to offer more insight on all of this shortly.

The guest there said stillness.

And again,

Wonderful.

And Casper shared a ceasing of thoughts.

Wonderful,

Wonderful,

Wonderful.

I'm delighted to hear that.

And then importantly,

I'm going to come back to this one a bit more in a minute.

LK said fear,

And I want to comment on that and offer insight that.

I'm glad you love my accent,

Louise.

Ruth has said isn't this no labels,

No good or bad.

Fantastic.

Fantastic.

And then Verena has said tremendous mental fear because so much credence.

Yeah.

Great.

So what I want to pick up on,

I want to draw out the ones that appear from the human perspective as challenging.

And then I'll pick up on the other ones in a moment.

Now,

The reason Verena and LK got that and this is quite common.

For this to arise.

In Elmer spiritual journey comes down to the ego mind.

We've believed in attached ourselves to.

We've been identified with for a long time in most of our cases,

Say,

Years and years now as that is challenged.

Has been at front and centre stage of our identity.

Suddenly has been challenged.

I mean,

It feels like its identity is under threat.

And the ego mind equates that with death of the identity and it equates that with death of the body vehicle.

And that's why fear arises.

In fact,

That.

Identification attachment to a belief in that all we are.

It creates a kind of like split inside and it creates a polarity and a sense of separation from that which we truly are.

Now,

In our daily lives,

We believe that enough and we keep on doing that and we suffer as a result when we start to challenge that.

And by opening to awareness,

Suddenly this split becomes more obvious and fear arises.

Now,

The fear is not a bad thing.

You may have been taught that fear is a bad thing,

But actually,

Spiritually speaking,

It's a great indicator.

So I want to thank LK and Verena for sharing that with us,

Because what that then is,

When this sense of fear arises,

It's actually an invitation.

It's an invitation.

It's an invitation to allow the power of that infinite awareness or that infinite silence to look directly at that fear,

To feel it fully in the body.

And just the simple allowing of that fear to be felt fully in the body,

Trusting that word I was talking about earlier in the power of awareness alone.

And what you'll find is,

Although this fear arise as a big wave,

As it sounded like it did for Verena and LK to varying degrees,

Just the feeling of that and the looking at that and the trusting only in the awareness,

That wave of fear will gradually and effortlessly dissolve.

I've shared this with thousands of people all over the globe,

This process.

I call it transmuting fear into love.

Just with the power of awareness alone,

That's all.

For awareness is the most powerful tool in our,

Shall we say,

Spiritual army,

Armoury,

Because we are awareness,

Infinite awareness that is untouched and unblemished.

So the reason the fear arose was because maybe in some cases,

I'm not saying that's necessarily true of LK and Verena,

We've challenged this identity by opening to awareness and suddenly,

Whoa,

What's happening here,

Ego mind goes,

Fear arises.

But actually it's a great invitation.

So the more that we are prepared to open to that,

Challenge it,

And we just did it in a different way this time,

What if I know nothing rather than asking the question,

Who am I?

Really,

It's the same meditation in a different way,

By the way.

Now we're onto something.

So this is a great indicator.

A great invitation.

Let me just read the rest of Verena's comments.

Another aspect is perfectly at home in emptiness.

Fantastic,

Verena.

Fear attached to never knowing enough.

So thank you for sharing those extra clarifications.

So another aspect is perfectly at home in emptiness.

That aspect that is perfectly at home in emptiness,

What is that?

What is that?

That,

My friends,

Is exactly what you're looking for.

What you have been seeking,

Whether consciously or unconsciously,

All of your life.

For emptiness,

Absolute emptiness,

Absolute emptiness is in fact the infinite silence,

The infinite awareness or the knowingness.

And it is completely and utterly at home as that.

So the recognition that you're sharing there,

Verena,

This one you can trust.

This one you can trust.

Because that is untouched and unmoved awareness that is completely at home with itself.

The other,

The appearance of fear,

It's not that it's not there and it feels very real.

Actually,

All that is is an appearance that's an invitation from awareness to say,

Look,

Verena,

You've been carrying this around for however many years.

Now is the time to face it,

Feel it,

Witness it.

And with the power of awareness alone,

The power of awareness alone,

It will dissolve effortlessly.

Effortlessly.

And again,

You don't need to believe me on that.

You will see this.

And the more that that happens to you as you move along your spiritual journey,

You will trust deeper and deeper and you will move to the highest form of trust,

Which is the not having to trust,

Which is the knowing.

So simple.

All the tools you ever needed are within.

And you have them at your disposal.

Just want to pick up on another part of Verena's comment,

That fear attached to never knowing enough.

Absolutely.

Thank you so much for sharing that Verena.

Again,

You see this human obsession with more and more knowledge is all ultimately a function of the ego mind.

There must be something more for me to know,

Something more for me to learn,

Something that I'm not seeing here.

And if I study hard enough,

Work hard enough,

Stretch myself far enough,

I will get to know it.

But the more and more knowledge you acquire,

A wise person once said,

The more I learn,

The less I know.

And so whilst knowledge has its uses,

It's clearly essential for practical living.

You know,

The simple bits of knowledge like how to cut,

How to walk,

How to drive a car,

How to go in,

All these things are useful.

But they're limited.

They're limited.

Knowingness is unlimited.

In fact,

It is no thing.

We're so used to thingness in the human domain,

We don't give it a moment's thought to no thing or nothing or zero.

Now,

No thing,

It turns out,

Is unlimited.

Beyond time,

Beyond space,

Has no limitations.

So the people that were starting to get is-ness,

No labels,

Stillness,

Silence,

Calmness,

Serenity,

There was an inner acceptance emerging there,

That in truth,

And one person got relief,

An inner acceptance emerging there,

That actually this stateless state of knowingness or no thing-ness is actually,

It turns out,

The home,

The true home we're looking for.

It doesn't mean that there isn't stuff still to arise.

For sure there will be.

But there's an opening to that acceptance that actually,

Wow,

There's something truly profound here that actually is blindingly obvious that we've actually been missing.

And that is the no thing-ness,

The knowing nothing or no thing.

You know,

And if there's one exercise,

So to speak,

Or thing that's constantly with me,

Even since the realisation,

Like every day,

And I know particularly when my head hits the pillow at night,

There's just this beauty,

Serenity,

Totality of acceptance that comes with this I know nothing.

I know nothing.

For that creates such a space,

Such a vast openness in one,

That from that arises the most profound wisdom of the universe that we all have access to.

I cannot put into words the beauty of that if you're prepared to open to that.

I want to also pick up on Vereena's final comment there,

Trusting nothing.

This is actually very important,

Or no thing,

Trusting nothing,

Because when we talk about trust,

Usually we're using it in the context of something that is external.

And what the invitation from your heart is here,

What is it that you're being invited,

I'm pointing you at,

To trust?

Is it this idea of yourself as this body-mind?

No.

No,

Not that.

It's to trust the infinite knowingness,

The knowthingness,

The absolute awareness,

The infinite silence,

That in fact you already are.

You just simply have not realised it yet.

Trust in this and trust in this alone will lead inevitably to its realisation.

And that's also why,

And I'm going to mention it one more time,

That video,

Not a video,

Sorry,

It started as a video,

But on Insight Time it's an audio,

That I mentioned that's on my profile,

Called Trusting and Daring Not To.

I really recommend you have a listen to that,

Only five minutes.

And by the way,

Just a number of people commented,

The ending,

The music,

Is a little bit sharp at the end,

It stops very suddenly.

It was several years ago and I didn't know how to edit that out at the time.

Anyway,

Watch that,

Or sorry,

Listen to that,

Because it emphasises the points I'm talking about here in a new way,

That will make you rethink and revisit the idea of trust and turn the whole perspective inside out,

Upside down and around.

And for many people,

It created such a profound aha moment when they listened to that one about trust,

Because we're moving,

Remember,

From belief to trust,

From belief to trust.

And that trust is in the intrinsic knowingness or the knowthingness,

The infinite silence,

That we truly,

Collectively,

Already are.

So simple,

So powerful,

So profound.

All the wisdom of the entire universe is literally awaiting to arise in you,

If you open to trust.

In life,

And you've probably heard so much about believing in yourself,

When actually I'm inviting you to trust this true self.

Fundamentally different.

Believing in yourself usually means the personality,

The idea,

The limited perception of who you are.

Trusting in that which you truly are is going to lead to such a profound shift.

And some of the most amazing things that you've never considered yourself has been able to express will start to come through more clearly by this opening.

They will just naturally arise.

And in fact,

An example of that,

A friend of mine who has been really been quite musical all her life.

And she's the harpist that I use tracks I use in sharing my material.

The tracks on her CD that I'm using here,

Quite a number of those just emerged spontaneously as she deepened into this awareness.

They just started appearing.

And I remember her messaging me saying,

Where is this music coming from?

And I said,

It's coming from the silence.

It's coming from that infinite space.

And it's wanting to express itself through you.

That's where it's coming from.

Just noticed a couple of people made some donations there.

Just briefly,

Just to mention,

Thank you so much on behalf of Insight Timer and myself.

It really does help Insight Timer and myself in sharing the message.

Thank you so much for that.

And then Karen saying,

Is the space you are talking about another word for God or the Christ consciousness?

Is the space you are talking about another word for God or the Christ consciousness?

And the short answer to that,

Karen,

Is yes.

It is.

It is.

The longer insight to it.

God is a word that you won't hear me use very often.

And the reason for that,

Having been brought up in what was the Catholic religion,

Which I left behind many years ago,

Following the calling of my heart,

Is it is a loaded word and it can mean so many different things to so many different people.

And it creates a limitation on what that which we call God truly is.

But in its purest usage and in its sense of infinity,

The is-ness of the universe,

The infinite awareness,

The infinite knowing-ness of the universe,

Then if you're using that in the context of the word God,

Then that's what I mean.

And again,

It doesn't require you to blame me on that.

It will be seen.

It will be seen.

Belief is not necessary.

Christ consciousness,

Another term.

Same thing or same no-thing to be more accurate.

Same no-thing-ness.

Same infinite-ness.

The infinite and the finite,

When we experience ourselves in a finite world,

In a finite body,

In a finite planet,

Although the physical universe appears very big,

It's still finite.

The infinite and the finite are not separate.

The finite is an appearance,

An expression of the infinite.

And just look at that word infinite.

The infinite,

Interestingly,

Is in the finite.

In finite.

Like the diamond metaphor I've used before on the prior two streams,

Imagine a multifaceted diamond,

Many facets.

And the facets of the diamond are like,

Is like your body.

It's an expression and it's intrinsically connected to the rest of the diamond.

And it's not separate from any of it.

And the luminosity or the awareness of the diamond,

The diamond being the entirety of the universe,

Is one.

And that single facet is just simply one of its infinite expressions.

That's all.

So,

Yes,

I am talking about Christ consciousness and with the clarification of the word God that I gave,

Then that also is what I'm talking about.

Isness,

True self,

Essence,

Source,

Universe,

Absolute,

Infinite,

Infinite silence,

Infinite awareness,

Infinite consciousness.

All different words for the same essence.

Verena is saying I couldn't access a donation payment.

There is another method.

Is there another?

Sure answer,

Yes,

I got your email actually just before the stream,

Verena,

And I've replied to that.

So you can have a look on your email for the answer to that.

Abbie is saying we don't know if the physical world universe is finite or infinite.

Absolutely,

I don't disagree with that.

When I'm saying the word universe,

When I'm using the word universe,

I'm using it in the context of the realized essence.

And as that is realized,

That will be seen to be infinite.

So that is before and beyond the physical universe.

The physical universe as vast as science currently measures it to be is hugely vast.

But as this essence is realized,

Then it's a non-personal realization.

It's not a personal,

There's no personal element to this.

It will be seen unequivocally to be infinite.

Now,

You don't need to believe me on this,

Abbie.

It will just be known.

But it won't be a you as the identity that knows this.

It will be the awareness as that which recognizes itself as that and knowing that it is in fact limitless.

It is before and beyond time.

No need to believe.

Any pointing offered there.

It will simply be seen.

It will be simply be seen to be so.

I don't believe any aspect of that.

Verena is asking,

Ever present,

Ever evolving.

OK,

So we're starting to get into some interesting things here now to be able to sort of unpack that and answer that question.

We need to sort of talk when we're talking about the absolute.

We can't actually put it in words.

The best we can do is point at it off a signpost saying it's like this and then we must go beyond the words.

Now,

The infinite in the context that I'm pointing out here.

The infinite.

This going right back to the beginning of what I was saying here is.

Untouched,

Unmoving,

Unchanging.

An infinite field of energy that's aware of itself.

Unchanging,

Unmoving.

This is very important.

Unchanging,

Unmoving,

Ever present.

The physical domain that we're so used to is an appearance within that.

What I did inside that came to me is the green screen of consciousness.

Consciousness is like a green screen in the movies onto which any phenomena can be projected.

Now that.

From our observation in the human domain is constantly.

Evolving and that bit is the finite part.

It's the expression.

As vast as it may be in a physical sense,

That is the expression that's constantly evolving.

Now,

The absolute domain.

The infinite.

The infinite silence,

The infinite awareness,

The unchanging essence is both before and beyond time.

Time is absolutely meaningless.

To the infinite.

Spaces as well.

Before time,

Before space is the infinite.

And this backdrop of unchanging.

Awareness and changing field of energy.

It is only from that.

That we can get the experience of the finite and change emerging.

Consider it this way,

Verena.

Where would sound be?

Without silence.

Just close your eyes,

Folks,

For a moment and just consider that.

Where would sound be?

Without silence.

And you may be starting to see that silence is essential.

In fact,

It's the prerequisite of sound.

I cannot remember which composer is just right now,

But there's a composer,

A famous composer you'll have heard of.

And a quote from him,

Which I'll just tweak just a little bit,

Is music is the silence between the notes.

He actually said it.

Music is the space between the notes.

Space.

You can check.

You can put the word silence.

Music is the silence between the notes.

Silence is essential to music,

Is essential to sound,

Is essential to all phenomena.

And to explore that more fully,

I think it was the previous stream to this one,

Which will be available on audio sometime in mid-January.

I explored that more fully.

The infinite silence isn't just the absence of sound,

It's the absence of all phenomena.

Essentially,

All phenomena are just different forms of vibration.

Many,

Many different forms of vibration.

So you would not have sound without silence.

You can have silence without sound.

I'm glad that's resonating for you,

Casper,

That seeing.

Sound.

Where would sound be without silence?

What we're talking about here is recognising the silence.

As the backdrop,

In fact,

The infinite silence,

As the backdrop to everything.

Louise,

First time at one of your lives.

I shall be back for your other sessions.

Thank you.

Happy New Year.

I'm delighted to hear that,

Louise.

And send my love to Manchester.

Live in North Yorkshire these days,

The other side of the Pennines,

Which I know is kind of to those people who know about Yorkshire and Lancashire.

We'll know how funny that is,

But there you go.

So I'm glad that's resonating for you,

Casper and Julia.

Brilliant,

Comforting,

Endless.

I'm glad that you've shared that,

Julia,

Because that awareness that you're sharing there is indicating an openness to this wisdom,

This seeing that we all naturally have.

But we've simply been conditioned out of recognising by believing everything that is going on up here,

Instead of the silent witnessing presence that's simply and silently observing it all.

That recognising that awareness is the fundamental to self-realisation.

And that which you are seeking,

It turns out you,

Non-personally,

As this awareness,

Already are.

And it is this that is realised,

It is this that is seen,

And it is this that I'm talking about and could go on talking about for hours and hours.

It's so important,

So powerful,

So profound.

And it doesn't require,

Once again,

For you to believe a single word I say,

Because it is simply seen.

Oh my gosh,

I,

Infinite I am that.

And in the same context,

Where is sound without silence?

That then moves us towards,

We cannot have the finite without the infinite.

It's the same message,

The same pointing expressed differently.

Sound is finite.

Sound appears,

Arises,

Fades away to silence.

Finite arises,

Appears as a phenomenon,

Fades away,

Drops back into the infinite.

It's the same pointing.

So we start to get a sense that the human level,

That the infinite and the finite are actually intrinsically interrelated in the same way that sound and silence are.

They're not separate,

They are one.

Again,

I've seen some donations coming through,

Thank you so much on behalf of Insight Time and myself for those.

We've been going just over an hour and 10 minutes now.

I think it's enough talking,

Enough insights for now.

What I'd like to do now is to go into a meditation for a while,

Maybe 15 minutes or so,

And see where we are after that.

We've got an hour and a half in total,

Drawing on everything that we've pointed out and shared so far.

And then see where we are in the closing few minutes that we have.

So get yourself comfortable.

Closing your eyes.

Simply becoming aware of the phenomena.

The breath.

Bodily sensations.

Emotions.

Whatever's here now,

Simply,

Silently,

Accepting that.

Without any judgment.

And simply be open to recognizing there's a witnessing presence that sees the arising,

The changing phenomena.

They come,

They go.

But the awareness,

The silence remains unchanged.

Unmoved by the passing of the phenomena.

And just being open now from your heart.

To the experience of what I call spheres of light.

Nothing you need to do.

The energy of the spheres.

The pure state.

I am.

Noticing this pure being,

This I am-ness.

And this is seen by what I call the silent witness.

And this silent witness itself is like sliver of ice in an ocean of water.

And it's dissolving.

By virtue of being immersed in the water.

Effortlessly dissolving.

Melting.

Becoming one with the water.

And the water is an ocean of infinite silence.

Totally immersed,

Dissolved in that.

In silence.

You will realise your truth.

In truth you will realise you are silence.

Infinite.

Silence.

Be still.

And know.

This.

Unchanging.

Unmoving.

Unblemished.

Silence.

Aligness.

Stillness.

Presence.

Truth.

Eternity.

This rarified atmosphere of silence.

Transforms.

Transmutes.

Dissolves.

All that you are not.

Effortlessly.

Be still.

And know.

In a moment I'll ring the ting sha bells three times.

Just keep your eyes closed for now.

The bell rings.

And as the sound of the bells has faded away,

Just trusting knowing this silent awareness remains.

And the attention,

The awareness of this can be here always.

Even as we start to become aware of the physical body,

The sensations,

The chair you're sat in,

Or whatever you may be lay on.

Simply be still.

And know.

And when the moment is.

.

.

And simply being here.

Good.

Namaste.

Namaste.

So thank you for sharing in that meditation.

And thank you for that comment,

Rob.

I'd forgotten that comment.

But yes,

There is a donation function,

I think,

There as well on that page.

And thank you for your comment,

Eva.

If anybody wants to share anything about the meditation,

Or ask anything from what I've shared so far,

Then please do so.

And thank you once again for the donations,

They are genuinely appreciated.

Just a reminder,

Whilst I'm just checking if there's anything we're sharing,

And I'll put some heart music on again to close in a moment.

Next live in this 11-part series is on Wednesday.

So in a few days time,

8pm UK time.

So Wednesdays and Saturdays,

8pm.

The next session is called Beyond Belief.

Beyond Belief.

And that's a good reason I've started to point out tonight.

I'm going to be sharing both insights around that,

But also a story that actually began as an awareness experiment in my childhood,

And became a reality some years later.

So that's a really profound and important story.

I did actually also respond to your email,

By the way,

Vereena.

So one way or one means or another,

There's an answer to your question.

So have a look out for that.

So Beyond Belief,

That will be done by virtue of a story,

As well as insights,

Something that emerged in me in childhood,

And then later was shown in another way,

Much later in life,

Actually after the realisation.

So it's a powerful way to look at why belief is a limitation,

And why we need to move towards or being invited to move towards trust.

So that's part two in a few days time on Wednesday.

The question was,

Are they recorded these lives?

The short answer is yes,

But for some reason that I'm not fully clear on yet,

Insight Timer don't allow the replays of the live video.

It's something a lot of people have requested,

Including myself,

Which I'd love for people to be able to do so they can come back to them,

Because I'd recommend you were able to watch these again and again,

For that repetition reason I was talking about earlier.

But the temporary solution is I'm creating an audio version of these from the recording,

Which will be uploaded as an audio file on my page on Insight Timer.

I've already done that with the first precursor session,

Which is the 22nd of December.

That will be done shortly for the 29th of December,

And very soon for this one,

Hopefully as well.

So by mid-January,

There will be audios available of all of these.

And I'm hoping Insight Timer will allow you to look at the videos as well at some point.

It seems strange to me that they're not automatically available,

Because pretty much everywhere else you can do that.

So I just hope that they will allow that,

Because it's really important to watch these again and again.

What is the name of your circle,

Ava says?

I think you're meaning there on Insight Timer,

And I don't currently have one.

But I could create one if there was enough interest on Insight Timer.

I think you can create a group.

So if there is enough interest in that,

Maybe just say you'd be interested in a circle like Ava has there.

And then if that's the case,

I can create one.

And I can tell you what its name would be if there is enough interest in that,

And I would call it Nothing Special.

I would call it Nothing Special for the reason that this series is called Nothing Special.

Nothing,

Meaning the no-thing-ness of the universe,

Actually came as an insight that this is how I should refer to this work,

Nothing Special.

Nothing Special is a phrase in English that we sometimes refer to.

That or something is nothing special.

But also,

The specialness of this realization is so profound that it is in fact also the greatest specialness that we all are.

So that's what it would be called if I did create one.

Helps us connect with you and other viewers.

Okay,

Well,

Thanks for that,

Ava.

I'll have a look at what is involved in creating that.

I imagine it's fairly simple to do.

Most things on Insight Timer are.

And maybe if I can get that in place before the next session on Wednesday,

Then I'll let people know.

So that's what it would be called,

Nothing Special,

For good reason,

As an insight in meditation.

The other thing I wanted to do is just point to our other resources on Insight Timer already,

As things that you can look at to deepen what I'm sharing here.

One of the most profound videos I have,

Which I've put as an audio version on Insight Timer,

Is called Fish Discover Water Last.

Fish Discover Water Last.

Have a look at that on my profile on Insight Timer.

It's another five-minute audio,

And it gives you a visual metaphor for self-realization in another way.

And I know that people have found that very,

Very powerful.

It's very simple.

It's told in a story format that helps you in the seeing of this.

Fish Discover Water Last,

Five minutes long.

I haven't mentioned tonight,

But I will mention there are seven versions of the Infinite Silence meditation that we've just done tonight,

From a quarter of an hour,

Max guidance,

Fully guided,

All with steps in there to help you see it,

Through to an hour and a half version.

The same meditation,

But with increasing gaps.

And use those either over seven days,

Seven weeks,

Seven months.

And as you become more familiar with the meditation,

You'll probably move on to the longer and longer versions,

And eventually be able to do it without my guidance.

So those seven meditations support this program,

So do look those out.

And then one final resource to make a note of.

Again,

There are quite a few others on there now,

And there's more coming in the new year,

Once they start being published again.

There's one called,

It's a half an hour one,

This one.

It's called the Self-Realization Session,

And it's my session at the sixth International Yoga Festival,

Which was run from Vancouver in Canada,

Online,

In 2020.

And it's a half hour session,

And there's 15 minutes of me talking about meditation and Self-Realization,

And then the Infinite Silence meditation.

And it's kind of like a summary of what this program is all about.

So look out for that one,

That's a half an hour one.

So the ones to look out for,

The ones I've mentioned tonight,

Are Trusting and Daring Not To,

Fish,

Discover Water Last,

The Self-Realization Session from the sixth International Yoga Festival,

The seven Infinite Silence meditations,

And one final one.

It's called Are You Looking for Love?

Are You Looking for Love?

So these ones are about five minutes long,

But the Self-Realization one is half an hour,

And the meditations of varying duration.

So do look out for all those.

Next session,

As I say,

On Wednesday 8 p.

M.

,

It's entitled Beyond Belief.

Beyond Belief.

So we'll look at that.

And we'll even do,

We can even do a meditation around belief as well,

As part of that.

And then I'll include the Infinite Silence meditation as well.

That's pretty much it from me.

I'm going to put the CD player on here.

So I'll see you Wednesday 8 p.

M.

UK time,

Live here on Insight karma for the next session,

Part two of 11,

Beyond Belief.

My name is Philip Wade,

Signing off here from North Yorkshire in England.

A very blessed,

Sacred and year of silence for you in 2022.

Thank you so much for committing to these streams.

May your heart speak to you in silence.

May you hear its calling and hear its message.

I'm going to sign off here now.

Thank you so much for being here.

Thank you so much for all the donations.

See you again soon.

Many blessings.