Hello and welcome to five minutes in nature with me Liz Scott and every day in February you can join me as I go out on my walk and find wisdom in nature.
You actually find me today inside,
I'm inside my garage having just been out this morning.
It's been dark,
It's been raining and windy and it's been like that for a couple of days and I've actually taken shelter in my garage as I record this because it was too wet and windy to record outside and it's been really interesting particularly yesterday because yesterday I felt very unsettled.
Do you ever get times like that?
I felt a real sense of disquiet,
Unquiet within me.
I was questioning myself,
I felt a little bit snappy and as though I just wasn't comfortable.
It felt as though I was not in a good place and I tried hard because I understand what's going on when I'm feeling unsettled.
I know that I'm just seeing the world in an unsettled way and I just tried really hard not to be nasty to people or to say things that I would later regret because I knew that I was feeling impatient and touchy and yesterday I felt this real sense of I'm just not good enough.
Who am I in the world?
I'm not good enough.
What am I doing?
I am not worthy.
I mean I'm smiling now as I remember back but I felt quite sad and empty and bleak in how I was about myself yesterday and I knew that my emotions like the weather were just raging and my emotions really did suit the weather yesterday.
It was stormy,
It was blowy,
We had very heavy short sharp rain showers and then hail showers and the hail when you're inside and you can hear it rattling against the window it sounds as though buckets of pebbles are being thrown at the house.
It's quite alarming and yesterday the weather reflected my mood perfectly and you know the thing I deeply know is that when I feel like that when I feel untethered from my source is that the worst thing I can do is try and fix my feelings or get angry at myself for feeling the way I do.
It's the equivalent of me walking out into the weather and waving my fists at the storm and shouting at the rain and saying go away I don't want you here,
Get out of my life because when I do that with the weather,
Well we all know that that's just a waste of time,
The weather will do what it will do regardless of my feelings and it's the same with my mood storms when they rage through me I know that they will rage regardless of whether I get angry at them or try and fix them or try and sort them out or not and it's been so helpful for me just to realize this because I used to believe that when I got lost in a thought storm and I felt unsettled that actually it meant I was untethered and I was not connected to the source anymore but that's not true I deeply know this to be so when I feel unsettled it just means temporarily I've forgotten it my deepest sense of knowing is covered over by a weather storm and that's fine my job is just to keep going one step at a time and sometimes that's all I've got so today just reflect on this for yourself are there times when you sometimes get lost lost in concerns and worries about whether you're good enough or maybe you feel unsettled or unstable or overwhelmed or you lack confidence in yourself it's okay to feel those feelings I really want to say that we all get lost in thought storms that's the deal of being human we compound those thought storms when we rail against them or we rage against them and we wish that they weren't there we try and fix them it's not that's not how thought storms work and like the weather it will do its thing and eventually it will calm down now today the weather is calming down and there is debris on the ground then the trees look pretty soaked and the ground is wet and muddy and we are in the aftermath of what happens after a storm so the message today is be kind to yourself if you are going through a storm or feeling discombobulated and unsettled it's okay it will pass and the Sun will shine again soon
