You start something new.
A business,
A creative service,
A consultancy,
A practice that reflects your values.
You pour your energy into your work.
It starts to grow.
It starts to attract attention.
And suddenly,
People around you begin acting differently.
Maybe someone in your industry stops responding to emails.
Maybe a former colleague makes a passive-aggressive remark.
Maybe someone who's never supported you before suddenly has a lot to say about your marketing or your prices or your location.
And you're left thinking,
Did I do something wrong?
Or did I just do something well?
Let's talk about that.
In today's episode,
We will unpack what's really going on when your business or creative success brings out discomfort in others,
Especially in peers,
Former colleagues or people in your industry who suddenly feel threatened or critical.
We'll explore psychological concepts like identity threat,
Social comparison and unconscious competition,
Plus why some people struggle to watch others succeed in a way they've told themselves isn't possible for them.
And I hope you will leave this episode with a clear understanding of why your growth may be unsettling to others without making it personal.
Practical ways to protect your energy and stay focused when you encounter passive aggression,
Sabotage or exclusion.
Tools to hold your success with pride,
Even when others aren't clapping.
And reassurance that success doesn't require validation from the people who are most uncomfortable with it.
And by the end,
You'll feel grounded,
Focused and even more committed to your growth and without guilt.
Let me ask you a few questions.
Have you ever noticed tension or distance with peers or colleagues after a period of growth in your business?
What sort of story do you tell yourself about those reactions?
Do you ever feel tempted to shrink your visibility to maintain harmony?
Who in your world genuinely celebrates your progress?
And how can you lean into that?
Are you subconsciously seeking validation from people who've never been supportive?
Okay,
Let's start with social comparison theory.
Psychologically on festing,
I propose that people evaluate themselves based on how they stick up against others.
In the business world,
This can get very messy,
Very fast.
When someone sees your brand growing,
Your content reaching more people or your business expanding,
They may feel they're falling behind.
That doesn't mean you've done something wrong,
It means they're experiencing an identity threat,
Which is a disruption in how they see themselves professionally.
If someone has tied their worth to being the expert,
The pioneer,
The go-to in their space,
Your innovation or success can trigger insecurity.
And if they've been operating from a scarcity mindset,
They might even see a success as their loss.
This dynamic shows up in subtle behaviors.
It could be snide remarks or withdrawing of support,
Could be public criticism disguised as concern or exclusion from professional networks.
This isn't about malice.
More often it's about unprocessed fear,
Fear that they're being left behind,
Fear that they haven't done enough,
Fear that they'll be forgotten or overshadowed.
And here's where it gets complicated.
If you're a sensitive,
Thoughtful business owner,
You might internalize that discomfort.
You might shrink to avoid offending.
You might over-explain,
Over-justify or even start playing small,
Just to maintain peace.
But that only feeds the cycle.
Because your business was never supposed to serve the comfort of your peers.
It was built to serve your mission,
Your clients,
Your customers,
Your purpose.
And here's the truth.
Growth will disrupt some dynamics.
And your visibility will reveal who was only cheering for you as long as you weren't ahead.
So let me tell you what you can do.
You can anchor yourself in purpose.
That means come back to why you started.
Ground your decisions and mission.
Not in other people's woods.
And refuse to shrink.
You're not too much.
You're just visible.
Let others wrestle with their own reactions.
But also choose who gets access.
Not every colleague,
Mentor or peer needs a front row seat to your progress.
Don't confuse noise with value.
The loudest critics are rarely the most aligned mentors.
Keep building your audience,
Not your approval list.
Focus on the people who need your work,
Not the ones who resent your wins.
Now you're wondering,
OK,
So what shall I do when it happens?
So if somebody in your field begins acting strange,
Here's a framework you can return to.
First,
Pause and assess.
Is this feedback?
Is this projection?
Is this actually about me?
And next,
Document behavior,
Not emotions.
Notice patterns.
You don't need to confront everything.
But you do need clarity.
And then redirect your energy.
Use discomfort as fuel.
Go create more content.
Refine your offer.
Serve your clients.
That is your power.
And lastly,
Find your people.
Connect with other values-aligned business owners who can hold space for your growth,
Not compete with it.
Research on workplace envy and competition shows that when individuals feel threatened by a colleague's success,
It can lead to behaviors like exclusion,
Sabotage and gossip.
But interestingly,
The best predictor of whether someone will be supportive or threatened isn't actually their skill.
It is their sense of security.
Secure people do not sabotage.
Secure people collaborate.
Secure people see others' growth as possibility,
Not a threat.
You're not responsible for other people's discomfort about your evolution.
You're not obligated to make yourself more palatable to those who haven't done their own work.
And you're not required to stay small just so others don't feel insecure.
Business is already challenging.
Don't carry guilt that doesn't belong to you.
Let others do their inner work.
You do yours.
And you keep building.
And if your light makes someone else uncomfortable,
Dimming it won't help.
Let it shine so the ones who need it can find you.
And if this resonated with you,
Please share.
