Why Social Media And Spiritual Ego Are Never Enough

All of these companies are just working off of brain network survival systems,

Right?

The dopamine motivation reward system.

It's a survival system,

Right?

It's not a satiation system.

It's survival.

It's go and find.

Go and find more watering holes.

Go and find new food sources.

Go and find more caves.

Go and find mates,

You know,

Procreate.

And it's not meant to bring you to satiation.

It's meant to keep doing it,

Right?

It gives you the motivation,

The energy,

The drive,

The focus to go and get,

You know,

Find the watering holes.

So you look all day and you find it,

Yay.

And,

You know,

Kind of the dopamine gives you all that.

But then the dopamine tapers off because it's like,

All right,

You know this watering hole,

You're not going to get the same dopamine hit,

Right?

Now go find other ones,

Right?

What if something happens to this one?

And so they're all playing off of this system.

Like all of the marketing,

All of the wanting,

All of the chasing is all just tapping into this system.

And we just sit there like the rat in the cage,

Just pressing and pressing and pressing the lever to get the little stimulation there.

But it's not happiness.

It's just craving.

It's more wanting.

And this is what the Buddha described 2,

600 years ago when he said,

A craving is like trying to quench your thirst with salt water.

I mean,

He was describing the motivation reward system.

It's not about satiation.

And they have capitalized on this,

Right?

And they've capitalized also on stress,

On stress,

You know,

Kind of bringing us in that sense of fear,

And I don't feel safe anymore,

And something's wrong,

You know,

Right?

And so as we're scrolling through,

Right,

If you're scrolling through whatever,

You know,

Scrolling thing,

You know,

Social media,

News,

Outrage news,

Right?

All the rage bait news that they're trying to just get your attention.

They're trying to make you mindless.

That is the intention of all of these.

They are trying to make you mindless.

And we just get lost in it,

Lost in it,

Lost in it.

And then all of a sudden,

An ad comes up at the right moment,

You're just outraged enough,

And you're wanting enough,

Right?

So add stress with the motivation reward system.

That's,

Yep,

That's exactly what I need to feel better.

I'll buy that.

Right?

And then it just,

It kind of just keeps us on this never ending cycle.

So they've,

They're all just hacking into survival systems in our brain.

And so don't,

You know,

When we kind of think,

Oh,

I can be smarter.

I can be smarter,

I can be posting every day on social media,

And it's not going to get to me.

No way.

No way are you not going to want the likes or the comments?

It's,

It's tapping into such a,

Such a primal part of our brain,

That there's no way you can beat the algorithms.

There's no way you can,

You can,

You can avoid the craving by participating in that.

There's just no way.

It's just not going to happen.

And Michelle,

To your point,

Like I was saying,

People are more disconnected than ever.

Because all of this gives the illusion,

Again,

Look how many friends you have,

Look how many followers you have,

Right?

You know,

You're texting with people,

It's like superficial relationships.

And,

You know,

At best on the texting,

But,

You know,

The likes and the comments beyond superficial.

And it leaves us just feeling more disconnected.

Oh,

Char,

That's great.

It's the digital ego,

The digital ego.

Yes.

Yeah.

You don't want a digital ego.

It's,

It's,

It's,

In fact,

We could say yes,

The,

You know,

This is the,

You know,

Like the Ginsu knives,

And they're like,

You know,

They're selling like,

Oh,

You get the knives,

But wait,

There's more.

It's like,

Oh,

You want the ego with all the lack and the craving and the grasping and the shame and the guilt and all that?

But wait,

There's more.

We've got the digital ego.

Yeah,

It's the supersized ego,

Never enough,

You know,

You could get 1000 likes,

And it won't be enough.

You could get the viral post today.

But then if you don't get the viral post tomorrow,

It's never going to be enough.

Yeah,

The one you have is already enough.

It just like supersizes it,

It keeps supersizing it.

Right.

And this is the problem in our society is that the ego keeps getting supersized,

It keeps getting,

It's like the McDonald's sizes,

You know,

The small is really large,

The medium is really extra large,

The large is a bucket,

Right?

And that's what's been happening with the ego.

Right?

It just,

It's become supersized,

It's become so big,

Everything in our culture,

In our society,

In our government,

In our business,

It's just all based around this sense of lack and outrage and anger.

And it's,

It's,

I mean,

Making people,

You know,

Really unhappy,

Making people really unhappy.

So yeah,

We should be aware of the conditions that,

That the ego thrives in.

No question,

Social media,

It thrives in.

And even news,

Be careful on the news.

Right?

Be careful why you're clicking on a headline,

Just,

You know,

Pause,

What am I hoping to get from this?

Am I really being informed?

Or how much of the news is just this kind of gotcha?

So much of it is just,

Watch my language on inside.

So much of it is just,

Ridiculous.

It's not news.

It's just,

It's just getting us more angered,

More outraged.

It's not helping.

So understanding all those conditions.

And again,

You know,

I will say this again,

Because I'm just going to keep beating this to death,

You know,

Also just recognizing when we're using our spiritual practice,

When the ego is wrapping itself up in spirituality as well.

It's still the ego.

It's still the ego.

Don't make images out of yourself as a spiritual person.

Don't make,

You know,

Don't get attached to your practices.

They're all your practices are to help us see that we're not the ego,

To see this whole process,

How the thoughts arise,

The sense of a me arises,

Right?

This kind of belief that I was there before the thought,

But in fact,

I wasn't,

I'm just assuming that,

Right?

So it's just to just see this,

It's just arising in this thought.

And just repeating the same thoughts over and over and over endlessly repeating the same thoughts.

I mean,

90%,

80,

90% of the thoughts you had today,

You had yesterday,

You had the day before that,

The day before that,

They're not new,

They're not original,

They're not interesting.

They're just the same old things.

What do they think of me?

What do I think of me?

I'm such a loser.

I can't believe I did that.

I'm so great.

I can't,

I did do that.

Oh,

No,

Now I'm back to a loser.

I can't believe I did that,

Right?

Just this yo-yo that we're on,

Right?

So,

You know,

The practices that we're using in spirituality,

Mindfulness,

Meditation,

Compassion practices,

Heart opening practices,

Gratitude,

Forgiveness,

Loving kindness,

Equanimity,

Sympathetic joy,

All of these are not to become something from them.

It's not to become a great meditator.

It's not to be the most mindful person in the world.

These are tools to help us see that we are not this thought created me.

So that when it arises,

When it does arise,

And it's telling me I'm a loser,

That I can see it like,

Oh,

That's just a thought,

Just a thought that's arising.

And you can use mindfulness and breathe into it,

Feel it.

Yep,

There it is.

You can use self-inquiry.

Who's the loser?

Right?

Really shining the spotlight on it.

Who's the loser?

Oh,

I can't find it.

Right?

As a way to keep seeing I'm not this.

So that then as you're going about your day,

As you're going about your day,

You're here.

You're not burdened by time.

You know when you've got to be somewhere.

Yeah.

But I'm not going to be any happier when I get there.

Because if I can't find happiness now,

I'm not going to find it over there.

But yeah,

Okay.

There's things that are going to be done.

Yeah.

You weren't doing any of this anyway.

It was just all happening.

Right?

And that's the recognition.

It's all happening.

You can take your hands off the wheel.

It's all happening.

Right?

It's all happening.

And then there's just this freedom of flow.

Right?

And you realize,

Yeah,

All thinking can still happen.

But no thinker.

Planning can still happen.

No planner.

Doing can still happen.

No doer.

Right?

Because you're seeing I'm not that.

It's been giving me the worst advice my entire life.

And it's not real.

So even if the ego still arises,

There's just no longer an identification with it.

And then those times when you do get a little lost in it,

And yeah,

We all still get a little lost in it.

Right?

But it's not for very long.

It's oh,

Phew,

Just got a little lost.

No problem.

No,

I forgot for a moment.

I forgot.

I was that for a moment again.

Oh,

I forgot.

Okay.

No beating ourselves up about it.

No.

Oh,

But I was,

Oh,

My God,

It was lasting for so long.

And now it's gone.

Right?

No grasping at it.

Because I'm not controlling any of this.

I'm not controlling the awakening process.

I'm not controlling what words are coming out of this mouth.

Right?

I'm not controlling any of this.

It's all just causes and conditions arising and happening.

And what I take to be,

Meredith,

Is really just an impermanent,

Ever-changing,

Ever,

Ever-changing,

Interconnected,

Interdependent being.

Nothing solid here.

Nothing to get stuck in.

Because it's just always changing.

It's just always changing.

And this is where the freedom comes from.

The spaciousness comes from.

Because the ego thinks it's a solid,

Independent,

Independent,

Not interdependent,

Not interconnected,

Independent,

Acting on its own,

Inherently existing,

Instead of interdependently existing in thought,

Just know it exists on its own.

Right?

That's what the ego thinks.

And that's who we think we are.

But then it's the reality of saying,

No,

I'm just thoughts,

Feelings,

Emotions changing.

Hormones,

Changing.

Neurochemistry,

Changing.

Energy,

Changing.

Right?

Being affected by the weather,

Being affected by all of you,

Being affected by all the previous moments,

Being affected by what the dogs are doing,

Being affected by whether I'm hungry or not,

Being affected by what I ate last night,

Being affected by a trillion different causes and conditions.

And it's arising this moment.

That all there is,

Is this moment,

Each moment arising all these different conditions,

These different,

You know,

Pieces of sand,

You know,

Little grains of sand coming together,

And changing and changing and changing.

Like there's nothing to hang on to here.

There's nothing to hang,

There's nothing outside of me that I could,

Could hang on to.

But there's nothing here that's solid that could hang on to it either.

And that's the seeing of like,

Oh yeah,

You know,

Conditions,

Pleasant conditions,

Unpleasant conditions,

Nothing going on conditions,

Experience of everyone,

Nothing to hang on to,

Nothing to push back on.

Right?

Right?

It's,

It,

We use the example of the river flowing.

Yes,

The river flowing.

You're not,

You're not anything solid.

You're,

You're constantly changing.

The river changes based on the conditions.

If there's a rock in the center,

If there's someone walking across the river,

If a tree fell,

If it got,

If there was a big snowfall,

Like constantly changing.

It's like,

It's speeding up a little here.

Oh,

Okay.

Let's go with it.

Right?

Oh,

It's slowing down a little bit.

Oh,

This is nice.

Yeah.

Okay.

Now what's happening next?

Because you don't know what's going to happen next.

We're always trying to imagine,

I know what's going to happen.

We're always imputing that we know and putting meaning in everything.

It's like,

You don't know.

You don't know.

Be,

Wake up and just wake up and enjoy the ride.

Wake up and enjoy the ride.