Fear And How To Handle It

I spend a lot of time wondering about life,

What it all means and how we can improve our journey.

I often go deep into thought about my emotions and I find that if I contemplate the reasons why I feel the way I do,

This helps me to understand not only my own mind but also the mind of others.

It's through this deep insight that I find if I take the time to reflect both my actions and the actions of others,

That I can indeed find peace even in the most painful and most awkward moments.

In the stillness is where you find forgiveness for both yourself and for others.

You will also find your truth.

Your ultimate truth is where everything in life is created from.

So if you don't know your own truth or spend time getting to know who you really are,

You may find life a lot more harder and confusing than it actually needs to be.

It's my intention that by doing these podcasts on each different subject I've personally explored,

That you'll be able to feel my truth and you'll be able to take comfort in finding your own.

Now it's important to know that not everyone's truth is the same.

What works for me may not work for you and that's okay.

If you resonate with what I have to say,

That's because your truth may be similar.

Again,

You will still have your own version of truth.

Not all the details will be exactly the same.

If I talk about something that brings up a feeling,

Something that may feel uncomfortable,

Take the time to sit and contemplate about what you really feel and why you feel it.

Look back in your life for similar feelings and try to dig a little deeper.

Try to understand where that comes from,

Why it bothers you so much or maybe why it angers you.

My intention is not to hurt you or to make you angry.

It's to help you reflect from a place of peace.

And lastly,

Before we start,

I'll ask you kindly that if you like what I do,

Then you can follow me on social media.

But if you don't,

That's absolutely fine.

No hard feelings.

For those of you who do like what I say,

You can follow me on social media at Where's Nat At?

Or you can email me if you've got any questions at nat at wheresnatat.

Com.

Before getting comfortable,

Please make sure that your phone is switched to Do Not Disturb and that if you're in a room that the door is closed.

If anyone else is around you,

Ask them kindly to not interrupt you or ask them to join you.

This is your time to relax and to wonder about life from a place of peace.

Make sure you're comfortable and warm and cosy.

Get yourself settled and relaxed.

We're going to tune into the breath.

We'll do the first breaths using only the nose.

But before taking your first breath,

Please be aware that when you breathe in with your nose,

Your stomach should inflate.

If it doesn't,

It means you need to correct it.

Breathing through the nose,

Deep into the stomach,

Will relax you.

So breathing through the nose,

Watching the belly rise,

And then lower is the way to do it.

Let's start.

Breathing in through the nose and out through the nose.

And again,

In through the nose and out.

One more time,

In through the nose and out.

You're now ready to wonder about life.

This is the wonder of fear.

I've started with fear because everyone has it.

It's present in everyone's life,

Every day.

Anybody who says that they don't feel fear,

I would say,

Is lying.

Fear is natural.

Fear is not always negative.

Sometimes it can inspire us and move us forward.

Without fear,

Sometimes we don't step up to our biggest challenges.

I came to understand that fear is just energy.

It's just an energy that is present,

Sometimes when I don't want it the most.

It comes anyway.

Fear is present in our lives,

And it shapes who we are.

Sometimes we can ignore fear and we can think we've moved past it.

And sometimes it will pop up again when we least expect it.

You might fear something in relationships.

You might fear having an honest conversation.

You might fear ending a relationship for the fear of not wanting to hurt someone.

Or you might fear going into a relationship,

Not knowing whether you'll lose yourself when you step into that field.

Fear is always present,

But how we handle fear and what we do with fear can be controlled.

When I first started to understand fear,

I was shocked.

Nobody had ever told me that fear was just an energy.

Nobody had ever explained that I could control my fear,

That I could talk to it,

That I could fully understand it.

But you can.

There have been many times in my life where fear has come up,

And it's terrified me.

It's stopped me from calling people,

From doing certain things,

From going to certain places,

And from stepping up into being the best version of myself.

But when I talk to fear and I ask it why it's here,

I get answers.

At first,

That was something that shocked me.

But it's true.

You can talk to any energy.

So this is how I spoke to fear.

It was five years ago.

I was sat in front of the mirror at home at my parents' house.

I was looking in the mirror and I'd been crying.

I'd just received a text message from a man,

And I was hoping for a different reply.

But the text message I received wasn't exactly what I wanted.

It was rejection.

It was my biggest fear.

When I looked in the mirror,

Something said to me,

Ask it,

Speak to it why it's here.

So hoping that no one looked at me and that no one could hear me,

I sat there and looked in the mirror and I said,

Fear,

Why are you here?

The answer that I got in my mind almost instantly was a laugh.

This laugh shocked me.

But following the laugh were the words,

I'm always here.

I'm always here,

You just can't always feel me.

For a moment,

I thought I was going insane.

I thought,

Is there a voice in my head talking to me?

What does this mean?

This is my honest truth.

I'm talking to you now and I'm telling you what happened to me.

As I started to talk more to fear,

I asked him and I put a man there.

I said it was a him.

I didn't think it was a girl.

At the time,

I felt like he needed to respond to me.

And when he did,

He told me that he didn't want to be rejected.

He felt lonely.

He didn't feel like I gave him any attention and he couldn't feel any love.

And those words were really strange.

I sat there contemplating,

Has my fear got a personality?

Does my fear exist outside of myself?

I continued the conversation.

It went on for almost 15 minutes.

But I highly recommend giving this a go because I got to know my fear very well.

Since that day,

I never saw fear the same.

It still came.

I still had fear and it still stopped me from doing things.

But I knew that it had its own energy and that when it got bad,

I could talk to it and relax and try and work out a solution to why I was fearing something and to move past it.

Being able to talk to yourself and to talk to the energy within is one of the most satisfying,

Easy ways to get to know yourself.

It's a long process and this is my truth.

This is what happened to me.

It may not work for you,

But I think it's worth giving it a go,

Especially if fear is always close by.

Fear is an energy that you can move with.

To ignore fear,

I personally think,

Is one of my biggest mistakes.

Many years ago,

After I had discovered what fear was,

I also realised that sometimes I didn't want to talk to fear.

I didn't want to face my fear the way it felt,

How I actually dealt with myself.

It was uncomfortable.

It was really tricky sometimes to sit down and face my fear.

But the more I did,

The easier it got to handle.

I even enjoyed crying sometimes just because I knew there was a release.

I remember watching something by Teal Swan and she said,

Whenever something comes up and you're afraid to feel it,

Instead of moving past it,

Instead of pushing it away,

Instead of ignoring it,

Go into fear.

Allow that to come up.

Allow all of the energy in your body to be changed,

To be tense.

Feel the fear.

It doesn't matter how long this takes,

But to feel it and to let it run through you allows it to pass.

If you block the fear,

You block the energy and it stays within you.

So many times I sat there and when I cried,

I cried hard.

I cried deep.

And I won't lie,

It was painful.

But they were some of the most transformative moments of my life.

I contemplated all my pain and all my fear through all my arguments and all my wrongdoings.

It can be embarrassing and it can be awkward.

And I'm not going to say it's easy.

I just know it's worth doing.

If you want to know more about yourself,

And you want to understand who you are and be a better version of yourself,

Then you have to follow yourself.

And sometimes that's going to take you to fear.

Because behind fear is peace.

It's the most beautiful,

Restful place.

If you allow fear to run through you,

Once it's gone,

You feel relieved.

You actually feel energized.

And you feel that you can handle anything else that comes your way.

And as they say,

Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

So if there's something that you haven't done because of fear,

If someone you need to say sorry to,

Or if there's someone you need to tell the truth to,

Or if there's a place you need to go or somewhere you need to be,

Talk to fear before you go.

Open up a dialogue.

Have a conversation with him or her.

And try to understand what your block is.

Allow every feeling to flow through you,

To be felt and to be transformed.

I want you to relax just for a few more moments and sit with the idea of talking to your fear.

Imagine what it might be like.

You don't have to use a mirror.

You might just be able to do it in your mind.

Many people might like to write it down and ask fear a question and to see what flows.

Whatever way you do it,

Make sure you do it.

Thank you for listening to The Wonder of Life.

Thank you.