Why You're Successful, But Still Not Happy

Hello,

My name is Noah Elkrief and today I would like to talk with you about why you're successful but still not happy.

Can you resonate with that one?

Does that one sound familiar to you or feel familiar?

I've spoken with so many people who get a lot of success,

Achieve their goals,

And then they're confused by not being happy.

Have you had that experience where you achieve something really great,

You know,

You get your promotion,

You create your company,

You make a million dollars,

You know,

You do something big in your career,

You got some success,

But you don't feel fulfilled.

You felt really high when you accomplished it.

It felt freaking amazing.

But how do you feel six months later,

A year later,

Five years later?

What is your experience in moment-to-moment?

Do you feel fulfilled?

Do you feel complete?

Do you feel like you're enough?

It is the experience within my own life as well as with countless clients over the last 10 years that success does absolutely nothing to make you happy.

Yeah,

Success is beautiful,

It just can't make you happy.

Yeah,

So whether you have a million dollars in the bank or nothing,

If you're sitting here with the lights off,

Computer off,

No distractions,

Just sitting there or lying in bed,

Does a million dollars in the bank help you to just breathe in silence and feel calm,

Peaceful?

Does it do anything to eliminate that busy thoughts?

If you're working and you have a lot of money in the bank or you don't,

Do you notice you still have that proving tendency?

You're trying to prove to the people around you,

To the boss,

To the employees,

To your team members,

To prove that you're smart,

To prove that you know well,

To prove that you're amazing in some way.

No matter how much money you already have in the bank,

No matter how much success you already have,

Does it reduce the intensity of your proving?

If you have perfectionism,

Do you notice at work or in your life the controlling?

I have to control every little thing,

Make sure everything goes perfect and exactly as I want.

No matter how much success or money you have,

It doesn't eliminate that.

If you're sitting in nature,

The amount of money you have doesn't help you to connect with the tree,

To see the beauty of the leaves blowing in the wind,

To feel the the niceness of the breeze touching your skin,

To feel fully centered and present and connected with with all that's around you.

If there's a man or woman in front of you that you're attracted to or you like,

The amount of money you make doesn't help you to feel calm and able to express yourself authentically,

Doesn't help you to give love or receive love.

It just doesn't,

It doesn't do it.

And so much of the time we're raised by parents who,

The best case scenario for themselves was to thrive financially.

A lot of times our parents come from scarcity or come from a from a family or society or a place where where the highest potential was to make a lot of money so that you can feel comfortable and you could raise your kids comfortably financially.

But we're past that now,

We're past that now.

We have to move from from scarcity to thriving.

From making decisions and living based on what helps our survival to what helps us feel emotionally happy,

Loving,

Connected,

Alive,

Passionate,

Playful,

Silly,

Smiley.

Yeah?

So our parents didn't know any better so they raised us to pursue success but but maybe for you as it was for me in some way was just like too easy.

I know that sounds,

For those of you who aren't successful watching,

I know that might sound ridiculous for you but for so many of us success is really easy.

It's no big deal.

We get it really young and then what?

And then what?

Well we accomplished what we set out for in this life so it seems.

But what comes next?

After success and we still feel lacking,

Proving,

Controlling,

Overly analytical,

Overthinking,

Not connected to other human beings,

Disconnected and isolated in our life,

What comes next?

Or life feels boring or blah even though you have the house or the car or the vacations or enough money to do anything with.

What comes next?

It's time to find your self-worth.

It's time to know who you are.

It's time to embody I am enough as I am.

It's time to feel love for yourself.

It's time to open your heart so you can let in love.

It's time to open your heart so you can give love and feel connected.

It's time to play.

It's time to deal with that anxiety that you never did so you can relax.

Hmm does that make sense?

You with me?

There's a very good reason for why I why you're you're not happy even though you're successful.

Like I see so much of the time people get success and and the example that comes to me it's it's so funny with sports right?

Somebody wins the championship maybe even wins the MVP and they feel so amazing but how do they feel next season?

How do they feel three seasons afterwards if they're not an MVP if they didn't win another championship?

They feel inadequate they feel lacking they want another one so the way it's it's it's the way sometimes when we're we're taught success is the key to happiness or when the biggest happy moments we had in our life was through success it's easy to conclude that the way to be happier is just to have more success but that is such an error that is such an error yeah so you'd like you get the promotion you make more money yay I'm happier but then you feel blah blah normal just like going through the motions and then you think I need another success that will make me happier yeah it will for an hour or a day or a week or a month if you're really lucky yeah if it's something really big but then what so so the the trick or or the subtlety that we have to pick up on is like hey you've had enough success in your life how many times have you succeeded in your life to get the good grade to get into your favorite college to get into your favorite company maybe to get your promotion or start your own business or whatever it is yeah to be bought out you've had enough successes to be able to look back and say oh each success felt good momentarily temporarily but it never lasts it never lasts because happiness is some not something you can achieve or acquire or obtain like money happiness is something that's left over you understand happiness is our nature you are happier when you were a baby and two years old probably than you are now why because all this shit was added on top of us all this programming buried emotions believe societal stuff that was placed on top of us that makes us feel insecure unworthy inadequate that makes us feel the pressure to prove and be perfect and and keep getting more you understand so to be happy to feel fulfilled is a process of removal as opposed to acquisition it's removing the beliefs the thoughts the the painful emotions as opposed to adding something good like a vacation or a nicer house or another thing on your resume yeah or more money in the bank I hope that's clear that that your unhappiness is and lack of fulfillment isn't a personal issue it's not that something went wrong sometimes there's this like hook that if I'm successful I'm not happy like something's wrong with the system yeah like the way that I was programmed is success first get success then you feel happy and it sort of feels strange when we get success and we're not happy but I'm here to tell you that's actually the way life works yeah so it's not any signal that you're defective or broken that you're not happy while successful I sometimes see clients who think I should be grateful I should be happy I have so much more than others it's not a case of should be no getting more success and money does nothing to remove the painful and emotions that make us unhappy so I'll leave you with that I hope it clears things up a little bit and if you want to look for actual self-worth true self-worth I invite you to check out my course which works on some of the common beliefs that make us feel inadequate and unworthy you can click the link anywhere around here and I hope it helps bye