Making Peace With Aging

I'm Skylar Liberty Rose and today we are going to take some steps together towards making peace with aging.

I'm going to share with you some of the common conflicts that can arise as part of aging and I'll also share some mindfulness prompts to use as a tool to help you get curious about your own experience.

Take a moment to get comfortable and then close your eyes.

Bring your awareness to your breath.

Notice the rise and fall of your chest as you inhale and exhale.

Give yourself permission to be in this space now.

Many of us have spent our lives seeking absolutes.

We often feel ill at ease with grey spaces,

Wanting instead for everything to be either black or white,

True or false,

Unknown or undeniable.

It can be challenging to find comfort in the between spaces.

We tend to want to label all the boxes and put each piece of life in its proper place.

For many years,

I was that person seeking absolutes.

When a truth became known to me,

Clear to me,

I would stubbornly attach to that truth,

Clinging to the clarity of its singular statement.

In a world of chaos and uncertainty,

It became desperately important to me that there was order and organisation.

Because if I knew where everything was,

Then maybe I'd know who I was and where I fit in.

But life,

By its very nature,

Contracts and expands and morphs and changes.

Over the years,

I began to understand that there is often solace to be found in a thing that is more than one thing,

In a truth that is part of multiple truths,

In a label that peels away to reveal another label.

I began to lean into the idea that there was a space of both and.

That there was a space in which a truth could co-exist with another truth,

Neither one losing credibility or merit.

Neither truth needing to prove itself in order to be true.

When it came to my own ageing process,

I began to realise that there were many truths within my body that were co-existing at the same time.

I felt grateful and confident.

I felt certain of who I was and what my purpose in this world was supposed to be.

I felt bolder and braver in my 40s than I ever had in my 20s or 30s.

I also felt lost,

Confused and uncertain.

I felt horror at the sagging skin that was hanging under my chin and the creep-like texture on my thighs and my arms.

I felt ashamed of my body rapidly changing,

Without my consent or approval.

I felt beautiful and strong and ugly and torn.

All of these things were true.

And all of the boxes and the labels that I had invested a lifetime into organising and maintaining was suddenly no good to me.

Because nothing was static or singular anymore.

It never had been.

Everything had always been changing and merging.

But I hadn't wanted to accept that fact.

If you are feeling a sense of conflict and friction about your own ageing experience,

I invite you to get curious about what that experience actually is.

Is it really conflict?

Or is it the sometimes uncomfortable expanse of a new experience?

Is it really friction?

Or are there simultaneous truths sitting side by side?

What might happen if you acknowledged the multitudes of your life,

The multitudes of the world around you?

Could it be true that you feel the privilege of living,

Whilst also grieving the years that have passed?

Could it be that some parts of ageing are enjoyable and that some parts feel incredibly daunting?

Sometimes you might find yourself in a space of discord where loving your ageing body meets the resistance of wanting it to be different.

Make peace with that by reminding yourself that more than one thing can be true at the same time.

Your inhale is not any less true than your exhale.

Your movement by day is no less meaningful than your stillness by night.

The fragments of you make up the wholeness of you.

Breathe in,

Breathe out.

Repeat these words.

I can be fragmented and whole.

I can stand tall in my uncertainty and my strength.

I appreciate all my body does for me.

I give myself permission to grieve for the years that will not come around again.

The multitudes of me each have a rightful place.

I am at ease with each experience.

Know that each and every feeling you have is valid.

Not because I'm telling you,

But because you are.

Because your body,

Your head and your heart are telling you of your very own experience.

It's important that you believe yourself and trust yourself because peace will come from that place of trust.

Go now and gather all of your pieces.

Collect all of your contradictions.

Let them sit side by side,

Each part of you turning towards the sun,

Feeling the warmth of love and acceptance that comes when each corner of your being claims its rightful place,

Its rightful peace.

In your own time,

Gently open your eyes.

Let your gaze be soft.

Let your breath be easy.

Let your awakening continue.

Thank you for joining me today,

Sending deep love and gratitude from my heart to yours.