28. Time – The Most Valuable Thing You Can Spend

When we utilize the day,

Right,

When we spend it as we should,

We're doing acts of kindness,

We're transforming,

We're taking the energy,

The essence of each and every day and doing the most we can with it,

We are given more days,

We're given more opportunities to do great things.

We are actually creating a reservoir of energy by how we utilize each day.

You can spend so much time being so busy that you don't actually pause and be still and take time for reflection and contemplation and ask yourself,

How am I spending my time?

What am I spending my energy on?

Is it purposeful?

Is it worthwhile?

Or am I just so busy doing?

No matter what I've done,

Even if it was a terrible thing a second ago,

Now there's a new investment of light.

There's a new investment of life.

There's a new breath.

And therefore everything could be different in this moment.

Welcome to the Spiritually Hungry podcast,

Episode 28.

I hope that everybody had a very happy holiday,

Happy new year.

And we are going to share a secret with you today.

Really?

I'm excited.

Personal secret of yours?

No,

It's a secret that we're going to share.

Oh,

I have many secrets to share.

This one's just about you.

Okay,

Go for it.

So actually it's called the secret of days.

And I'm really excited about this concept that we're going to discuss.

I think that it can help people,

Especially in going into the new year to make sure they utilize each and every moment of every day.

Time.

Yes.

Time is of the essence.

So there's a section in the Zohar,

Which is the main Kabbalistic text.

And it says,

The righteous through actions of sharing,

Give life to their days.

But those who live with the desire to receive for the self alone,

Their days give them life.

Rabbi Acha continued this teaching by saying there are certain people who are old,

Meaning who have lived many days,

But don't have their days.

And some might have their days,

But do not have their years.

So this is a really profound section.

So what does it really mean?

I'd love to hear your thoughts in a moment,

But days are so much more than how we think of them.

And I think that we are all guilty of that,

Right?

We take it for granted.

It's a day,

There's another day,

There's another day.

And each day we expect that we'll be around to experience it,

Right?

And therefore we give less importance and therefore probably do not utilize our time,

Our days.

Yes,

We're going to get to all of that.

But as I was saying,

Everything has an energy and existence into reality,

Including each day.

By giving life to our days,

We create positive energy that can manifest as blessings,

Opportunity,

And ultimately a long,

Vibrant life.

So there's the key there that I want to unpack a little bit.

Think of it this way,

Your day to day is here to give you and your life energy.

Without this day,

You wouldn't exist,

Right?

We would all agree on that.

So from here,

We have two things that can happen.

And this is our choice,

Right?

One,

You can either deplete the energy of the day through only doing actions that are selfish just for yourself alone.

And at the end of the day,

The day is dead.

And I know that sounds scary,

But that's the reality.

Or- Well,

Again,

Dead if you understand what that means.

We're going to unpack that.

That's when I'm going to invite you to share your thoughts.

Just one more minute.

The other option is you can share in that day and by doing so you put energy into the day.

In each moment we're either depleting the day or giving it energy solely based on whether or not our consciousness is focused on sharing or receiving for the self alone.

So basically in a nutshell,

When we deplete our days,

We deplete ourselves.

So that's- Why is that?

Can you explain that?

Because when we utilize the day,

Right?

When we spend it as we should,

We're doing acts of kindness,

We're transforming,

We're taking the energy,

The essence of each and every day and doing the most we can with it,

We are given more days.

We're given more opportunities to do great things.

Conversely,

If we spend days taking them for granted,

Not appreciating them,

Doing nothing with them- So you're saying as a spiritual rule that you will get more days.

Correct.

Okay.

Because I thought you were saying something else,

But which I think is also important.

It also happens to be true even if you didn't mean it.

I'm sure I did.

But go ahead.

Instead of this question and answer session,

Yes.

The fact that if we invest our days with what I would call purpose or on the other hand,

We can say eternal actions.

The ones that live on long after we're here.

And those are in the category of things that we're doing for others,

We're doing for the world.

Sharing kindness outside of ourselves.

Bigger than us,

Yes.

Actually creates that day to be alive,

Not just today,

But tomorrow.

Because I think most people don't think about time really.

And even those who do think that,

Okay,

Let me use today to the best of its potential.

But then it's over,

Right?

And then tomorrow,

Even if I'm conscious,

I'll use tomorrow for the best of its potential.

But we're touching upon there- I never realized that there's an effect of not using the day before.

Well,

Not just an effect,

Right?

So I think,

Again,

I really think- Yeah,

There's two ideas.

There's two ideas.

One that the day that I've lived has the potential to remain a source of energy and light for me.

That the days that I've lived are not just gone,

But that used properly,

They actually remain as an energy source.

And we should talk about that.

Yeah,

I want to talk about that.

No,

Let's stay there,

And then we'll go to the idea that I had.

But that's,

I think,

A relatively either new or revolutionary idea for most people.

Yes.

Right?

This is not.

.

.

And by the way,

And I hope we have time to get into this,

Science backs up this spiritual teaching.

But one of the secrets,

I think,

The czar of the section that you're quoting is revealing to us,

Thousands of years before science came to this,

Is that days do not pass,

But rather they remain.

So that even today we're recording,

It's a Tuesday,

Monday,

Yesterday,

Actually still continues to exist.

Now,

I think we need to explain what that means.

Yes,

Unpack that.

So what exists from Monday?

So,

And this is a concept that's referred to in the biblical phrase,

Coming with your days.

Because Abraham,

For instance,

Came with his days.

In reference to anybody who's lived a good life,

It always says they come with their days.

So if yesterday I acted 51% of the time,

For example,

In ways that were kind,

In ways that were either kind to myself,

Kind to others,

If I did use 51% of the time yesterday to create positivity in whatever way that manifests,

That energy actually remains.

And that means today on Tuesday,

I still am supported by that energy that I created on Monday.

Right.

So when you say support,

What does that mean though?

Well,

I want to,

But conversely,

If yesterday I behaved selfishly,

If yesterday most of my day was yelling at people,

Getting angry at people,

Doing things that were only benefiting myself,

Then that day is depleted of its energy.

And then also the next day you wake up probably feeling inspired,

Depressed.

That's the effect,

Right?

But in reality,

Today on Tuesday,

My energy source is less.

Where it can be that I'm still drawing energy,

Light,

Support from Monday into Tuesday,

I can also conversely make it so that I do not,

And I'm not able on Tuesday to have any of the energy of Monday.

And this is how we live our lives,

Which I think raises a very important question.

But this,

Again,

I think is both a beautiful concept,

But one that really needs to be understood,

Explained properly by us,

But understood and then used.

So again,

I want to just go back for one second.

So let's say if a person spent Monday doing acts of sharing,

Pushing themselves above and beyond ways that are innately comfortable to them.

Uncomfortable.

In their comfort zone,

Right?

Oh,

If they did.

Yeah,

If they went against their comfort zone,

Right?

Monday,

They're constantly pushing themselves,

Looking for ways to give,

To share,

To go out of their way to help other people.

And on Tuesday,

If I'm hearing you correctly,

They'll wake up feeling even more supported by the universe.

Maybe they feel more light.

They feel like they're glowing,

They're excited.

They have ideas,

Right?

Because they're supported by the energy they created on the day before because they tapped into the essence and the availability of all that was there for them in that day.

Exactly.

Conversely,

If they acted in ways that were selfish,

Rude,

Hurtful,

Caused pain to other people,

Then they would wake up on a Tuesday and they would feel some of their light,

Some of their energy source,

Even as if it's waned and they may feel sad,

Tired,

Depleted,

And not really be motivated or inspired to do more.

Right.

Right.

So that is what you're saying or we're saying when you are affected good and bad depending on how you spend your days.

And then that is a cycle that goes on each and every day of your life.

So if a person stays in the negative each and every day,

Then you can imagine what weeks,

Months,

Years for them will look like.

Right.

Where and conversely,

Right?

If one individual,

If we do invest our days with energy and do at least 51% of the day in the way it's meant to be used,

We actually create this tremendous reservoir of energy,

Light,

Blessing,

Support that will continue to benefit our lives.

As we're speaking,

I'm imagining the cartoon,

The Incredibles,

The animation,

Because they have a force field.

Like one of the powers that one of them has is a force field of energy around them.

It's this ball of energy that protects them from bad things that are about to come to them or puts things.

.

.

And it's kind of that we're creating,

Right,

Or diminishing our force field.

Exactly.

And I think that,

Again,

I just think it's such.

.

.

I get excited about beautiful ideas.

This is one tremendously practical,

Right?

Every one of our listeners should,

After hearing this.

.

.

Well,

There's a formula.

That's what I like about it.

You do A,

This is B.

But now tell me about science.

Well,

If I can,

Before that,

There's the other part of what you said.

So I really want.

.

.

I know.

I'm just trying to stay to what.

.

.

I thought we'd finish that side and then we're going to go to the other part of what I said.

Okay.

Okay.

I thought I'd make a note because I think it's also really important,

The idea of actually.

.

.

Okay.

I guess we're going there.

Go ahead.

No,

No.

I think that you're actually able to create longer days,

More days for you.

Longer life,

Right?

Yeah.

Because there's a teaching from a great sage.

I won't forget,

Sweetie.

Yes.

Science.

Science.

So if I.

.

.

Do you have your permission to quote a little bit,

Read a little bit from what I think is an amazing book?

Well,

How do you have that prepared when you didn't know what I was.

.

.

You didn't know I was going to start like that.

No,

No,

I did not.

I guess in some way we're connected.

I guess so.

So I strongly recommend any one of our listeners interested in the concept of time,

Which is really what we're talking about now,

To read a beautiful,

Powerful scientific book written by a modern day physicist.

His name is Carlo Rovelli.

You like him a lot.

Yeah,

I do.

Fascinating.

Again,

For me,

Because when you see.

.

.

When you've studied something your whole life though,

And then you find a scientist who's saying the same thing that you've always understood to be true.

You started by quoting a section from the Zohar written about 2,

000 years ago.

And now really only in the past really century,

Unless science is coming to that same understanding.

But first,

As I was saying,

So again,

I strongly recommend Carlo Rovelli.

He has quite a few books.

I spoke about the Seven Laws,

Lessons on Physics,

Which I think is a beautiful book.

This one is a little bit longer,

A little bit more dense,

But beautiful,

Called On the Order of Time.

And what I like about it is that very often we have the opportunity to teach,

To speak to people,

And there are people who are spiritually inclined and there are people who are not spiritually inclined.

And for me,

To really understand the Kabbalistic wisdom,

You don't really have to accept any spiritual teachings because it's written in the Bible,

Because it's written in any book,

Even though it's written for thousands of years.

You need to study science.

And through the study of science,

You will come to many of the Kabbalistic principles.

The first thing he does though,

Carlo Rovelli,

On the Order of Time,

Is he makes it clear that the way most of us understand time is wrong,

Which I always find,

I always think it's important in all areas of our lives when we're wrong to really upend so many of our understandings.

So I'm going to read two paragraphs from a book that I love and I could literally,

And I wouldn't do this,

Would read five chapters,

50 pages.

No,

We're not doing that.

So I summarize what modern physics has understood about time.

It is like holding a snowflake in your hands.

Gradually,

As you study it,

It melts between your fingers and vanishes.

We conventionally think of time as something as simple and fundamental that flows uniformly,

Strangely from everything else,

From the past to the future,

Measured by clocks and watches.

In the course of time,

The events of the universe succeed each other in an orderly way.

Past,

Present,

Futures,

The past is fixed,

The future open,

And yet all of this has turned out to be false.

One after the other,

The characteristic features of time have proved to be approximations,

Mistakes determined by our perspective,

Just like the flatness of the earth or the revolving of the sun.

The growth of our knowledge has led to a slow disintegration of our notion of time.

What we call time is a complex collection of structures,

Of layers,

Under increasing scrutiny and ever greater depth.

Time has lost layers one after the other,

Piece by piece.

So don't take my word for it.

Take the science world's word for it.

Time as you and I,

As most of us think about it,

Does not exist.

So now after that introduction,

This concept that you raised from the Zohar,

That idea that the past continues to exist.

Again,

If I told you this 2,

000 years ago,

As the Kabbalists wrote down 2,

000 years ago,

That's an interesting theory.

It could be right or wrong,

But nice spiritual theory.

But science today actually has a name for it.

And they all,

And they believe that the past does not pass,

But actually continues to exist.

Then the scientific word for it is,

Or the theory of it is called eternalism,

Which again.

.

.

So what does that mean the past continues to exist as if it's happened?

I mean,

So I'm packed up.

Yeah,

I will.

So I'll give,

If you don't mind,

I'll give a story that illustrates this.

Right behind you there on our collection of pictures,

We have a picture of our wedding day,

Me and you dancing,

And my father who left this world about eight years ago now,

Standing there smiling.

And it was one Friday afternoon and I was sitting here in our living room and I was studying,

I was reading,

I was inspired,

And I looked at that picture.

And the first thought I had was joy.

It clearly depicts joy.

It's me and you dancing on our wedding day with my father looking over smiling.

I always say this,

But my father loved you before I loved you.

And then the next thought I had was a little bit of sadness because my father's not physically in this world,

And the joys that we experience now with our family,

With our kids,

He's one would think maybe not here necessarily to experience it.

And the first thought that came to my mind is where does all that joy go?

Right?

We all have moments of joy in our lives.

And our natural false inclination is to think,

Well,

The joy that happened 23 years ago at our wedding,

That was and it's past.

But what if that joy continues to exist?

And what if you can actually access it?

And this is the kind of- Don't we live like that?

Like this is why,

I guess I would never call it time,

Right?

But I think that through your mind and through your consciousness,

You're able to bring past into the present.

Well,

And how beautiful is it?

I don't think people have practiced that enough.

I don't think people believe- I mean,

I was on an airplane once and I'm a runner and I was feeling really,

It was a long flight and we were flying to Israel and I put on this song that I run to,

I think it's called Dream Man or something.

It's like no words.

Oh,

Right,

Right,

Right.

It's a beautiful song.

It's a beautiful,

And it just goes on and on.

I haven't heard it in a long time.

And so I put it on because I was craving a run and I started,

And it closed my eyes and I was so in the Zen with that song,

I started sweating.

My body started reacting as if I was running,

Right?

So I think that we underestimate the power of our minds.

We're not going to talk about that so much today,

But I think that as you were speaking,

I'm looking at that picture,

I went back there to our wedding in that moment.

I remember Tharav's face and his joy and his happiness and I feel it in this moment completely.

So it's interesting that I never thought of it as time,

Right?

I never thought of it as past versus present.

I just think I always looked at it as how you hold.

.

.

Memories.

Memories and experiences.

So a memory is time then?

Is that what you're saying?

Well,

Right,

So there's two ways to view that,

Right?

So one way to say is this happened 23 years ago and by closing my eyes and thinking about it.

.

.

And being there.

I could feel what is no longer in existence but occurred 23 years ago or.

.

.

No,

I'm there.

Exactly.

And this is where I think,

Again,

Beautiful,

That that joy actually never stopped existing.

I stopped accessing it by going through what I thought.

.

.

It doesn't dissipate and that's the problem with time as we understand it,

Is that we put it in a capsule and it's some.

.

.

We don't even put it in a capsule.

It's a photo album.

You know,

It's something that.

.

.

And it's interesting because I have a lot of photo albums and I have keepsakes with children.

Very organized,

By the way.

I just cleaned our house out this week.

I know where every single thing is in every closet and cabinet and there's nothing in this house that I don't want.

But I even have David,

Our oldest first pair of shoes,

Which are 22 years old.

I know.

But my point is that I think that.

.

.

And so some people say,

Oh,

You know,

I don't have anything from my childhood.

I have nothing.

And so they don't even have the memories in a way.

And I think that's another illusion of the whole idea of time and experience.

And I have this opportunity with my father a lot,

Right?

I'm still.

.

.

He's still here,

Even though he's not in so many ways.

He's still here because I bring him to life all the time when I'm around him,

When I think about him.

I bring back the version that's always been my father,

Not the one that is taken over by disease.

Right.

And again,

I think there's two ways that our listeners can understand that,

That we can understand it.

And I think both of them are beautiful.

One of them is actually very exciting and actually true.

And that is,

Again,

You can say when I am in that place where I'm thinking about my father and his health,

I am remembering something that happened and is no more,

But I'm able to access it through my remembrance of it.

Or,

And this is what science tells us is true.

And again.

.

.

But I'm not remembering.

I'm awake because he's still alive.

He is.

.

.

Right.

His current state is not healthy.

But I'm choosing to experience him,

Experiencing him now in this moment as his whole self.

And what we're actually saying,

And that's what the Zora section that you read,

And that's what science is telling us today,

That you can in that moment,

Not just bring to this moment a memory of the past,

But actually experience that past that still exists.

Because you know why,

Honestly,

Is that.

.

.

And we've never spoken about this actually,

But when I think about people who have limitations now like my father,

Right?

But he's still alive and there's still parts of him,

I'm sure,

That are aware even if he can't articulate that.

There's a soul in his body.

So for me,

He is very much alive and living.

And that's why I keep bringing the way I've always experienced him back into his body now,

Because he is still here.

And I often look at it as my limitation that I can't see him whole.

I don't know what he's thinking.

I don't know what he's feeling.

It doesn't look okay to me,

But what do I know?

So I'm very aware of that illusion.

So I have never put him in the past actually,

Because he's still very much alive.

But.

.

.

It's a choice.

That's not the obvious,

Right?

And my sisters probably don't experience my father that way.

My mother doesn't experience my father that way.

Right.

But it's a choice to actually connect to a reality that exists,

Not a memory that has passed that I choose to experience now.

And if you think about that,

By the way,

It's.

.

.

Again,

It's one of those things.

I've never done drugs.

.

.

Like sort of.

.

.

If we had this conversation on drugs.

I would imagine it would be with all the expansion.

But this really is the.

.

.

Because once you understand this spiritual slash scientific reality,

It expands your mind to hold it in a different place.

For example,

You choose what parts of the past you can experience.

And that means that in any given moment,

And even if somebody is no longer physically in this world,

You can access that reality of them being here.

And I think,

Again,

That opens up many,

Many new doorways to experiencing life.

And again,

Like I said.

.

.

And I hope we didn't lose our listeners and sort of going deep into this,

But this is a very important spiritual slash scientific understanding.

And one that if you start using it.

.

.

I've done that.

So I've done that.

I've taken the time and looked at a picture and not just remembered it,

But actually brought myself to experience that energy,

Light that exists.

So that's the first thing you were saying,

Right?

The first thing you were saying is that we are actually creating a reservoir of energy by how we utilize each day.

And that gives length to our days,

To our lives.

And therefore.

.

.

Exactly.

So therefore on Tuesday,

I can have the energy of Monday with me,

Or I can choose conversely to be selfish and so on.

On a Monday,

So that on Tuesday,

It's not there to support me.

I was going to go on to the next point.

Go ahead.

Yeah.

So it's funny because I realized.

.

.

Is this about time also?

It's about time.

It's all about time.

It's about time.

Is that something you say about time too?

What?

No,

I had something to say about time also.

Well,

I was just.

.

.

Oh,

God.

Yeah.

So the second point that you made from the Zora is the fact that it's a spiritual rule that when you are mindful of time,

When you are mindful of your days,

You're given more days to do.

And the great Moroccan Kabbalist,

Rabbi Chaim Ben-Atar,

Who said that he used the parable of a king who had thrown diamonds in a pile of dirt,

And they fell there.

And then he asked those who were close to him,

Can you please go and find the diamonds and clean them?

And when one person,

For example,

He didn't take the king seriously,

So he'd like every few days,

Months,

Years,

He would go try to look.

He would maybe find or not find,

And he would bring the king back a dirty diamond.

The king obviously is not very inclined to keep him on the team looking for the diamonds,

But the individual took it seriously and spent all of his days finding the diamonds,

Cleaning the diamonds,

Bringing the king another diamond,

Another diamond.

He stays on the team and the king wants him to keep searching.

So too,

He explained,

Is how the spiritual system sees every one of us.

Every day is a diamond,

Diamond meant to be found,

Cleaned,

Elevated.

And when we find the diamonds in each day,

Which means we focus our work on goodness,

We focus our work on helping other people,

We focus our work on what's really important,

Then the spiritual system,

You can call it the creator,

Says,

Okay,

This is somebody who I want him or her to stay in this physical world,

Just keep finding those diamonds and doing that work.

And I think it's a very,

Again,

Hopefully inspiring- I think it's inspiring,

But I think for some it might be terrifying.

Well hopefully it's a good awakening.

Depending on how they're living their lives today.

I think for all of us,

It's a good awakening to say,

Listen,

If you want to be blessed with more days,

Make sure that the days that you're living are lived.

Are lived actually.

You know,

Sometimes when I'm stuck in traffic,

Instead of bemoaning about it,

I like to look into people's homes- I can't believe you just admitted that.

And windows.

When we drive sometimes and it's nighttime,

You get really excited.

Because the lights are on.

Because I'm very curious about people and human nature and I think it's very- That's true.

Not just a warrior.

Informative about how to live really.

And that's the thing.

So sometimes I'm stuck in traffic,

I'll notice people just like staring out their window and kind of waiting for the day to pass is what it looks like from my perspective.

Right.

But maybe they're just meditating and so connected.

Yeah,

They don't look too happy.

And then,

You know- It's like those people again,

And I feel better.

No judgment.

But those people who go on a flight and we know a few people like that who just- Actually,

There's a Seinfeld episode on that where the guy just sits there for hours,

Just stares at the front seat in front of the night,

Not to read or both.

I don't get that either.

But they wait for the day to be over,

It goes into night.

At night,

They wait for the next day to come and so on.

And that's why I really like looking into windows is it's a very sobering thing to see.

I mean,

Whenever I notice it,

I'm like,

Oh my God,

I'm not going to waste my time.

On the other hand,

You can spend so much time being so busy that you don't actually pause and be still and take time for reflection and contemplation and ask yourself,

How am I spending my time?

What am I spending my energy on?

Is it purposeful?

Is it worthwhile or am I just so busy doing?

And I think that I have been guilty of the latter.

So I've really worked hard to change.

I'm still really get uncomfortable if my planner is empty.

Those are my favorite days.

But I'm learning.

I'm learning.

When I remember when I was about to give birth to our fourth,

I scheduled nothing around her due date,

Not that week,

Not the week after.

And she was five days late.

So when we passed,

I'm like,

Oh my God,

I have nothing to do.

And I started to panic.

You would think that I would be relieved.

But I realized in that moment that for not having a plan made me feel actually unaccomplished,

Which is ridiculous because there's so many things I want to study and read and write about.

Actually,

I'm where my best day or it would be the time I actually can just read and study and discover the day.

And just exactly.

So what I've and I've learned this actually from Warren Buffett and Bill Gates.

They met years ago and they weren't really excited about this meeting,

But they met and they were talking about this idea of saying no to things.

Right.

And it doesn't sound spiritual.

And this is what was this is what I really had to master when I started to think about this idea years ago is that saying no isn't a bad thing.

But it's confusing for me because my work is to help people,

To support them,

To say yes and be there for them.

But what am I saying yes to?

Right.

So it is important to say no to certain things.

And they actually have like Warren Buffett puts nothing on his schedule ever.

But most actually successful people are the ones who have a free schedule because they have the ability to learn,

To explore,

To read,

To think,

To create.

Right.

So I've gotten much better with that.

I've learned to say yes,

But not at the expense of my own of saying yes to me.

I struggle.

I'm not.

I'm still better.

But yeah.

But again,

Obviously you're just trying to help more people.

I mean,

But I would be interested to that point,

I think,

Especially with technology,

Right?

Everybody has a phone.

Yeah.

Right.

We don't,

When people or we are not thinking enough.

On how we spend it.

No,

No,

No.

Just not thinking enough.

Like can you think of yourself?

You're getting in a car,

You're putting a radio on or you're sitting in a car,

You're watching,

You're going on Instagram.

Like I think one of the reasons why there were so many wise people,

You know,

In the past is because,

And this is,

We know Einstein did not develop his theories and then his discoveries by sitting,

You know,

Sort of in front of a computer,

Right?

He would literally walk around,

You know,

And that's,

And you need,

You need the time to think,

You need the time to explore,

To see things you're curious about.

But I think also we let a lot of distractions come in and we spend our times on the wrong things.

And I don't think we,

We really focus on one thing.

I mean,

I,

I interrupt you all the time and you're really good at saying no because you're very focused.

But I mean,

Imagine if a doctor was performing a surgery and in the middle of somebody came in interrupting and he's like,

Oh yeah,

And was distracted.

I mean the poor patient,

Right?

When I've given birth,

If I was like,

Oh yeah,

I think I'm gonna do something else right now until the baby comes out.

I mean,

It just doesn't work like that.

Things require our focus and our attention,

But I think that we don't have a respect or an understanding about time and how it should be utilized.

So I would say,

I just want to stop it.

I do this sometimes when we,

But I think we've,

You've,

In this case you've shared something really important.

And what I'm hoping that our listeners really take the time to take this in.

So what you're saying is that we should be questioning how we're using our days.

Yes.

I was just going to say one thing before you go into that.

No,

I just want to underline that idea because I really am calling out to our listeners now.

When was the last time you looked at your day,

Your week and really question how are you using it?

But this I think is a helpful tool because when we look at our lives,

We're usually assess them in weeks,

Right?

I mean,

Last week,

You know,

There was Christmas vacation,

Then we're going to new years and then a Friday's the weekend.

I mean,

It's usually,

Usually week to week,

Sometimes months,

Sometimes years,

Right?

Somebody who are too busy and in the routine and the minutia of the day and the details,

They're like year to year,

Right?

Last year wasn't great.

Next year will be better.

But in truth,

We're meant to focus on days within each day,

Which we talked about this.

There's a spark of light that's meant,

That one is meant to perfect,

Right?

And Kabbalists teach that we are each given the exact amount of days we need to live.

So the spark we're meant to perfect on this day,

Right?

Today cannot be perfected tomorrow.

Just as the spark we could have perfected yesterday can't be perfected today.

And so each day has its own unique work related to the specific aspect of the soul that needs elevation.

So I wanted to talk about that a little bit because I think that's going to change the way people look at their lives,

But also how they spend time,

How they spend each moment of every day.

If you allow a distraction or knock on the door or social media or an email or a phone call,

People are constant distractions all day.

And also not just that,

I think part of it is also like before this podcast,

We had some,

I don't want to call it drama,

Right?

Something happened that could have said,

Right?

And then often I think what happens sometimes in a person- So you mean like literally right before this podcast?

Yes,

Yes,

Yes,

Yes.

Well,

One of our kids,

Nothing major,

So I hope none of our listeners worry.

But the point is- Did you have drama or I had drama?

I did not.

I thought you had and you shared it with me.

That was my drama.

It should have been your drama because it equally affected you,

But I admit the main.

I'm sorry.

Yes.

Okay.

But the point is when,

Because you're talking about not wasting,

Right?

But I think there's the added element of when you- By the way,

My immediate reaction after the drama that happened right before this,

It's like,

I don't feel like doing this podcast.

That was my original thought.

And I was like,

Can I really actually share information when I'm not feeling my best in this moment?

I was like,

You know what?

I am not taking that moment seriously because it wasn't a serious moment.

It's just something that happened.

I could have handled it differently.

Okay,

Next.

But I would add to that is what you just said is that every day has its unique energy never to come again.

So if you had allowed or whenever we allow something that happens in that day that brings us down,

That makes us upset- It deters us from doing something.

Okay,

This day is over.

I'm going to bed,

Lie down for an hour,

Whatever that- As if I would have never.

Or I'll just go and have a drink,

Sort of write off this day.

That just often because,

Not that there's anything wrong with having a drink at the end of the day,

But that- But not to- To write off the day,

It's because we do not appreciate the day enough.

And the spark of what am I supposed to reveal today.

Like there is no way we weren't doing this today.

I was clear about that.

And that opportunity that happened right before this was meant to happen also in this day.

Right.

So not just appreciating and therefore not wasting time in the day,

But also my job today is too important to be distracted by drama,

By somebody upsetting me.

I think that's another added layer to the consciousness that we need to have about our days.

My task today is too important,

Never to come again,

That I can't be not only wasting time,

But also sidetracked by all kinds of possible upset and drama and so on.

Well,

I often give my students the tool that when your day starts to go in a direction that you're not happy with,

Instead of writing the day off,

You can restart your day at any given moment.

Like that's what I did,

Right?

That happened.

And then- Speak about that a little bit more because I think obviously easier said than done.

No.

So can you give me an example of when you've done that or how you've done that?

Because I think it's- No,

I just did that.

Like in this experience,

What just happened right before the podcast,

I hadn't anticipated that.

I hadn't planned for it.

I didn't enjoy it.

And it altered my mood for a minute.

And then I thought,

Okay,

There's something valuable to learn here and I'll address what that is later and I'll maybe repair it.

But in this moment,

There's another opportunity that's calling me in this very moment to share light,

To inspire people,

Record the podcast and I'm going to be the best version of myself and I'm just going to start again.

I didn't judge myself.

I didn't question why did it happen.

I didn't try to make sense of it.

I was like,

Okay,

So that happened and now I'm just going to restart.

And you can restart your day over and over again because so often people like,

I can't believe this happened.

This was supposed to be such a good day.

I had planned X,

Y,

And Z.

It didn't turn out that way.

That's it.

I'm just going to go meet a friend for a drink.

I can't wait till tomorrow.

That's how most people respond to things that happen that they don't want to happen.

And they have a lot of feelings about it.

And by the way,

Especially with kids,

How many times you plan a family outing or plan a family dinner and this person starts fighting.

And then like,

So you can fall to the,

Oh,

Okay,

This one's done.

You know,

Next time.

Or you just restart.

You know what?

That happened.

You're going to get it next.

And it sounds trivial,

But actually by you telling your brain,

We're not going to put energy here.

You're ordering it to now move on to the next thing and you can train yourself to respond in that way.

By the way,

I think that's a very powerful,

Simple tool.

I've been using it for a decade.

It is.

In all areas.

Not just about time,

But about life.

Yeah.

About reactivity.

But there is a story of a Kabbalist,

Has this idea of time,

Right?

Those people look at their watches and they think,

Okay,

I'm a minute older.

I mean,

It's gone by.

It's the next day.

Time's an illusion.

Right?

I know.

But so the story of the Kabbalist,

He has a watch and he keeps looking at it over and over again because looking at it while he's praying,

Looking at it on stop,

His students finally say like,

What's so special about this watch?

What are you waiting for?

What are you waiting to happen?

And he said,

No,

No,

No.

I don't look at time that way.

As I just explained,

The way I see it is that it's an opportunity for another spark of something,

A renewal that's about to happen.

So the way he viewed time was that something great is coming,

A newness is coming,

Right?

And I think that that's a really kind of cool way to change the way we view time,

To see it as an opportunity for more moments of connection and of purpose and of opportunity.

Right.

It's interesting.

We just finished the days of Chanukah where we light candles and there's a really beautiful understanding that really talks to the point that you were making.

You know,

If you look,

And that's why the czar for instance says that you should meditate on an oil burning wick because when you look at a wick sitting in oil burning,

Your eyes tell you the flame is there,

Second to second,

Minute to minute,

Hour to hour.

But what is actually happening?

What is actually happening is that the oil comes through the wick,

Burns up.

In the next second,

A new drop of oil has to come up for it to continue burning.

Once the oil is done,

The flame is extinguished.

So even though our eyes falsely tell us that I look at a flame that has burned,

That had burned a second ago,

Continues to burn out,

Will burn a second from now,

Continues for minutes and hours,

Actually every second is a new flame.

That's right now.

Right.

And this is,

I think,

Such an important consciousness with which to live.

And again,

To your point,

Maybe giving us the strength to be able to say,

Okay,

That happened a second ago.

This is a new energy.

This is a new life.

This is a new moment.

And it's actually,

And that's where again,

As I said,

The Zohar says that you meditate on the flame of a burning oil because it gives you that,

Hopefully,

Awakening of consciousness.

And there's actually a beautiful section in the Midrash that says that the right way to view life is not,

Again,

That I am alive now.

I was alive a second,

A minute ago.

I will be alive in a minute.

But then every breath is a gift.

Every breath is a new investment of energy.

We do not view ourselves as born and then a person lives however long that is,

80 years,

90 years,

120 years,

And then they die.

But rather every second is a new breath of life.

And when you start and when you really,

And again,

You need to train your mind in this way,

But when you really train your mind both having appreciation with that,

You're able to take the next breath and you're able to receive from that supernal source of your soul life for the next second,

Gives you appreciation.

But more important,

It also gives you the understanding.

Everything's new now.

And I make a difference,

And this relates to another teaching which I think I've shared before,

But one of my favorite ones that one of the great Kabbalists said,

If a person does not believe that after having done the worst thing in the world,

Whatever that is,

In the next second he or she can be the most elevated soul,

He hasn't even begun his spiritual understanding.

And why?

Because no matter what I've done,

Even if it was a terrible thing a second ago,

Now there's a new investment of light.

There's a new investment of life.

There's a new breath.

There's a new drop of oil.

And therefore everything could be different in this moment.

I compare it to a newborn or a toddler because every day there is that newness.

It's an excitement.

What am I going to discover today?

And as parents,

We're like,

I can't wait to teach the child something new,

To show them something they've never seen before because they're so new.

Imagine if we approached our own lives like that and we saw ourselves as not so much as a toddler,

But in that idea of every day there's something new to discover.

There's something new to learn,

To master.

Something new to be excited and happy about.

That's really what life is.

I always imagine,

One of my favorite things with our kids or you on Instagram,

So these tons of these videos,

That the kid's just giggling just from something silly,

Right?

I aspire to live like that.

I think just be giggly and happy and appreciative of every next even silly things that happen.

What's interesting,

There's a blog I actually wrote about this idea.

And again,

My father inspires me a lot on this kind of topic and this idea.

And he was a very serious person his whole life,

Very stern,

Authoritative,

Strict.

And now in his state,

He's quite silly and he has a made up language that I find quite amusing because I never saw my father like that.

So I'm embracing it.

And he has this word that he created,

It's called troha.

Troha.

Yeah,

I'm not sure what it means.

Is this the title of your blog entry?

Yes,

Troha.

How did you say it?

T-R-O-H-A?

T-R-O-H-A.

And he would just yell it out and then I would start giggling.

And I just thought it was the funniest thing.

And so then I'd say it with him.

And I don't even care what it meant to him.

But what it meant to me is the idea that to just embrace the moment.

I mean,

Of course,

There are times where it's sad and there's times where he is still lucid.

He'll say to me,

You look tired today or come put your head on my shoulder.

Sometimes he'll say his mind is broken.

He'll have moments where he is there.

And on this one day,

Because I go to visit him at the community center when I'm in Los Angeles and I was sitting with him in the lobby there and my father was a chemist and his friend,

The doctor,

They both can't put words together so much and they were struggling just to participate in the day.

And then as I'm sitting with them,

I'm thinking about that.

And then I see these young moms come in with their toddlers because there's a program for them in this community center.

And the kids are excited for the new day.

The mom sometimes seems stressed that they're not being the perfect parent or that their kid acted out a certain way or they're trying to manage so many different things and they're stressed about all of that.

And then I started to think about this idea of time.

Because for the doctor and the chemist,

It couldn't go by any slower than it was.

Basically they were tired of life.

And then you're looking at these moms where they have not enough time in the day.

You have the toddlers who don't have a clue about time.

They're just in the moment.

And I was so taken by that and it really struck me and it made me stop and say,

Okay,

It's a choice.

How do you want to spend your time?

How do you want to view time?

What do you want to put energy and purpose to?

Because at the end of the day,

Are we a chemist?

Are we a doctor?

Are we an author?

Are we a rabbi?

What really matters at the end of it all?

And we've done a podcast on stress.

We've done it on purpose.

But if you put it all together in this idea of time and how we spend our time and what we give energy and purpose to and you look at it through the lenses of all the people I just named,

It's a real reset moment.

It was for me.

It still is.

And it inspired me.

It continues to inspire me.

Beautiful.

Beautiful.

I think we should do next week's podcast on time because I know there's a lot of points you haven't gotten to and many that I haven't gotten to.

I think the way we view time is so fundamental to how we use it that it deserves a second podcast around this.

I mean,

I think the question to leave our listeners with today is if you could see every moment in your life as a gift,

How would you spend your time differently?

Very important question.

Very important question.

So we will be revisiting this topic with hopefully new and inspiring content next week.

Or in the weeks follow.

I'm not sure what I thought.

I might be moody.

Let's see.

Okay.

We'll follow Monica's lead on this.

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