So I'd like to talk about confidence because throughout my own life I always felt that confidence was something I was going to gain from becoming someone or having enough knowledge,
Being smart enough,
Having the validation that was necessary to be confident or to excel in whatever it was that I was partaking in.
There was always this constant need of looking to the outside before looking inside,
So I was always chasing my own tail.
I'd look at other people and think gosh how can they be so confident?
What do they have that I don't have?
What's the secret?
And through years and years of suffering with social anxiety,
Low self-esteem,
I felt like I tried everything.
I had therapy,
I tried EFT tapping,
I read books,
Listened to podcasts,
Said all the affirmations I could think of,
And yet I still didn't feel confident.
Even after finding meditation and yoga,
There was still something lacking.
There was still somewhere for me to get to,
As if I wasn't already worthy enough.
But through sitting with myself and becoming more aware of my being,
Of my existence,
Of my consciousness,
I've now realized confidence is someone's natural essence once they release themselves from the prison of their mind.
You could think of it like this.
You are a vast,
Open space.
You are neutral.
You are at peace.
And the mind,
With all of its thoughts,
All of its beliefs,
Judgments,
Right or wrong,
All of the desires,
All of the past experiences and future imaginings,
This is all the mind.
And the mind appears within that space of your open beingness.
And the more that you allow the mind to overtake and get so involved in what the mind is saying or thinking,
It's the more space it takes up within your vast space.
So then you start to identify as the mind and the thoughts and the beliefs,
Rather than sinking back into the truth of your being.
So when we don't feel confident and we don't feel good enough,
It's because we're allowing the mind to overtake and we're becoming identified with the words,
With the thoughts.
And when you become closer to your real beingness,
So when you start to disengage from the thoughts and just sink back into your being,
The more that you do this is the more that you will just naturally merge into yourself,
Which is just a natural confidence,
Ease,
Peace and contentment.
No need for validation.
No need to prove that you're good enough.
No need to people please.
You are already whole.
It's not even a thought,
It's just a knowing.
So let's begin with a meditation to help us sink back into our true beingness.
Closing the eyes if you're not already.
And just following the flow of your breath,
Bringing your awareness into your body,
Into your being.
Noticing how you're feeling,
What feels alive for you right now.
And not getting caught up in the thoughts.
So anytime that thoughts arise,
See if you can watch them,
Notice them and then sink back into yourself by bringing your awareness back to your consciousness or your breath or maybe your third eye,
The space between the eyebrows.
It's a beautiful thing about our awareness is that we can focus it on anywhere that we want,
Which means we are not stuck.
We have the power to focus.
So you have the power to either focus on the thoughts or on your true self.
So breathing in light from the Sun,
Purifying the body.
Breathing out any stagnant energies,
Letting it all go.
You can take some nice breaths like this.
And with every exhale just allow the body to sink,
To relax.
Breathing in light,
Breathing out dark.
You could imagine that you're breathing in the Sun's light into the crown of your head.
As you exhale,
Imagine that you're breathing any stagnant energies down into the earth,
Releasing it out to Mother Earth,
Giving it back.
Let's just move through a body scan just to allow you to fully relax the body.
So relaxing the forehead,
The cheeks,
The jaw,
The mouth and tongue,
Shoulders,
Arms,
Hands,
Chest,
Upper back,
Belly,
Pelvis,
Sinking.
So now as you rest,
Just keeping your awareness on yourself.
Maybe staying with the rise and fall of your breath.
Maybe focusing your awareness on your third eye.
Just notice that you are aware,
You are here,
You exist.
You are a gift,
You are divine,
A miracle created upon the universe.
You are the universe,
Confined within a human being's body.
It's only that society taught you that you're anything but whole.
Maybe people from your past,
Bullies from childhood,
Siblings,
Parents,
Teachers,
Bosses,
Partners.
Maybe they made you believe that you are anything less than fully worthy.
So this is your reminder.
It's only our thoughts which make us believe we are not worthy.
We are insecure.
We hold on to these thoughts and believe them to be true.
We make them into our identity.
So can we disengage from those thoughts and stay open?
Let go.
Let go of your ideas.
Let go of your assumptions.
Let go of the meaning that you place upon everything.
Just come back.
Come back home to yourself.
This is what you've been seeking.
This is what we all seek.
It's ourselves.
It's our true selves.
And we've been home the whole time.
Just not realizing as we've been so caught up in the thoughts,
In the lies.
So you,
My love,
You have the power.
You have the power.
You have the strength to focus your awareness on the truth.
What do you want to focus on?
You can literally change your vibration by changing your focus.
And if the thoughts are overwhelming for you and you can't seem to shake them off,
A good stepping stone is just by gently tweaking the thoughts.
Could you find a better feeling thought?
So rather than thinking I'm not confident enough,
I'm not good enough,
You could change it to something like maybe I don't always feel good enough but deep down I know that I am and I strive to feel worthy.
Because as nice as all of the affirmations are,
If we don't believe them then it's a pointless exercise.
Give yourself compassion.
Give yourself love.
You spend the whole of your life with yourself.
If you're allowing the mind to bring you down then that's not a good relationship to be in.
So self-love and self-compassion is a must.
So now you could take one hand to your heart,
One hand to your belly,
Just for a moment of self-connection.
Breathe into your being and allowing a sense of love to flourish from your heart.
You can do this by simply thinking or imagining someone or something that you love or a place,
A pet,
A person.
Allow that warm feeling of love to emanate from your heart center.
Allow this feeling to well up from inside of you.
Allow yourself to feel,
Just feel,
No thinking needed.
And now direct this feeling inwards.
Turn this beautiful loving energy inwards into yourself.
Think into the love that you are,
The purity that you are.
And stay here for as long as you need and remember confidence isn't something that is gained.
It is what you already are without the chatter of the mind.
Sending so much love.
