How many times have you looked at others and wanted to be where they are?
How many times have you railed at your own life,
Downed your own choices and achievements,
Comparing yourself to others?
How many times have you looked in the mirror at yourself and wished for more?
How many times have you seen things that are not there?
Take one deep breath.
Often what we see is not the truth,
Not the reality.
These are fragments of a world in our brain that we must adjust.
When I was younger,
I used to be afraid of the street light outside our bathroom window.
Each night as I walked up the stairs to get ready for bed,
The light would come on and the shadows it cast inside the house were of a face,
Smiling,
Laughing,
Taunting me.
I would duck down and hide my face,
Running up the stairs straight to my bedroom and would hide under the covers.
It didn't matter that it was just a light.
My brain saw faces taunting and laughing and teasing me.
My mother told me that this light was a fairy's light,
That they were sitting watching over me,
Guiding me.
That the faces were from the patterns on the glass,
But that the light was here to guide me.
She would take me in her arms and we would go outside to see the light.
Each night I slowly and surely stood straighter to face the light.
I accepted the light to guide me,
To conquer the fear knowing that what my brain was telling me was not true.
What I thought I could see was not what was really there.
Take one deep breath.
As years went by,
I would remember that image of the light in my deep conscious mind and I would recall my fear as a four year old and how my mother tried to help me make peace with this and make me feel lighter.
To be able to get to bed calmly,
To have a restorative night's sleep.
There were no monsters,
No faces,
No one was taunting me.
It was just a light guiding me.
Take one deep breath.
Every difficulty we face is sent to test us.
Whether it's a street light casting shadows or the untruths our brains telling us that we are not enough.
Inhale one deep breath in and recognize the calm and peace around you.
This is all you need.
Let your world be still as you breathe in and out.
This is the state that you deserve to be in.
Now when I'm feeling stressed and my edges are brittle,
I think back to the younger me.
How I needed to be held and soothed and how each night with love and my own strength,
The fear washed away and the image became something sweeter and more delicate.
My inner peace became my guiding light.
Take one deep breath.
Let your inner peace be your guiding light.
To not fear the mirror or the shadows or the things you compare yourself to that are not you.
Take one big inhale and as you exhale be at peace with who you are.
Take comfort in knowing that you are enough.
When you are slipping into moments of doubt,
Take one deep breath in.
Release that tension.
You are safe.
You are loved.
And you are exactly where you need to be.
