For this investigation,
We're going to examine our experience of inside and outside.
We take for granted that there's an in here and an out there,
But can we find that to be true in our actual experience?
We'll keep our eyes open to begin with.
First,
Find an object in the room that you can place your attention on.
Let your eyes be relaxed so you're not staring intently,
But don't go into too soft of a focus so that everything becomes blurred.
Place maybe half of your attention in the focal point of the object and the other half in the awareness of your periphery.
Does it feel like the object is outside of you across the room?
Without moving your gaze from the object,
Check back in your visual experience.
Can you see your own head?
Can you see two eye holes or anything that seems like a window out of the skull?
If not,
Where is the seeing happening?
Is there any inside that you are seeing out of,
Or is all that is available to be seen in your visual field simply appearing right here,
Neither inside nor outside of anything?
If thoughts start objecting that things really exist out there,
Suspend that disbelief for a moment.
Thinking and conceptual learning aren't of any use right now.
This is a purely experiential practice.
Now,
Sit or lie down in a position where you can't see any part of the body,
Including the hands or arms.
Continue looking at one object in the room,
Still maintaining that gentle half-focus.
Since you can't see your head right now,
Just imagine that you don't have one.
You don't need to positively visualize not having a head.
Just don't resort to thoughts or logic to insist that one must be there.
For now,
Just accept that there is no head.
And since you can't see a body either,
Allow that feeling of headlessness to expand out into a feeling of being completely bodiless.
Now,
Still looking at the object and the space in front of you,
Notice what it feels like when there is no head or body,
When instead there is simply an object in a room,
Appearing all on their own.
Does it feel peculiar in some way?
Do you perhaps suddenly feel a little anxious?
If so,
That's perfectly fine.
None of this will hurt you.
Just keep gazing at the object and letting that sense of being headless and bodiless continue.
This might be a good time to notice,
Is the object that you're looking at independently identifiable from the rest of the room?
How is the distinction made between the various shapes and colors currently appearing in the visual field?
Can you easily distinguish anything as being separate from anything else without appealing to thought?
If there is no head or body,
How can there be anything inside or outside?
In the direct experience of your visual field,
Can you find any experience that seems to indicate that you're looking out from any sort of finite enclosed space?
Are those distinctions starting to feel meaningless?
Let's investigate physical sensations next.
Are you feeling sensations where there once used to be a body?
If so,
That's fine.
It might seem like a silly question,
But are you looking out from those sensations?
What connection do those sensations have with the visual field?
Notice if the appearance of those sensations is implying an internality and if it's giving credence to the illusion of seeing from an inside,
Even though they are not connected in any way.
Now close your eyes.
Does this at first make you feel like you must be inside of a closed skull again?
If so,
Maintain that feeling of bodilessness and headlessness and see where the blackness or other vague low light sensations are appearing.
Is the experience of that dark screen actually appearing inside of a head?
Or is that darkness just as much of the whole experience as the view of the object you had just been looking at?
While looking at the darkness,
Try to use that split awareness where one half of your focus is on the dark or other colored blobs and lights that might be appearing,
While the other half of the awareness is tuned into the surrounding spaciousness in which all of those visuals are appearing.
Let's tune back into those physical sensations.
Eventually you can try this exercise both with eyes open and closed,
Though to start we'll keep them closed.
Scan through the body to see if you can feel any sensations of tingling,
Vibration,
Or tension anywhere in your experience.
See if you can notice any feelings in the area we normally call our chest.
Does it feel like those sensations are certainly happening within the boundaries of a body?
Feel into how far those sensations stretch out.
If you gently rest your awareness on them,
Do they seem to extend past what you ordinarily take to be the boundaries of the skin?
With eyes closed,
Can you feel any boundary between the sensations in the air around them?
Are there any boundaries between the supposed body and the chair or the floor?
If any boundary seems to exist,
Pay more attention to that spot and see if it starts to shift.
See if it begins to move or blur or become somehow indefinable.
Is there any indication that those sensations are appearing inside of anything?
Can you still tell where an inside or outside might be?
While holding on to that cloud of indistinct sensation,
Keep maybe 50% of your awareness on those physical sensations while opening up the rest of the awareness to the auditory field.
Are the sounds and physical sensations happening anywhere separate from each other?
Are they not all appearing in this same space?
Now place your attention fully on the auditory field.
You can keep your eyes closed for this part.
Notice sounds happening in the room,
Maybe a refrigerator running,
An animal moving around,
Anything else that's relatively close by.
Does it feel like it's out there?
If so,
What is it about the sound that is causing this assumption?
Can you find distance or separation inherent in the actual sounds themselves?
Or are you experiencing a mental overlay,
A sort of instantaneous thought that projects an assumption of spatiality where none inherently exists?
Now focus the attention on the furthest sounds you can find.
Maybe distant traffic,
Birds,
The wind blowing across tree limbs,
Whatever it is.
Do those sounds feel even more out there than the ones in your room?
If so,
How can that be?
How can two things both be outside and one feel even more outside than another?
This is not a question to be answered with the logical mind.
Feel into the experience that comes when this question drops into awareness.
Again,
How can two things both be outside and one feel even more outside than another?
Now notice,
Aren't all of those sounds,
Those in the room,
Those outside of it,
All appearing right here in this same space?
If they weren't,
You wouldn't be able to notice them.
Without a head or a body available in your current experience,
Do those sounds really seem to be external to anything?
Are they really appearing at different distances?
Different distances from what?
Could it be that they are all right here?
In this same space as the physical sensations,
The visual field,
And everything else that is available to be experienced?
Now turn to sounds that we would normally refer to as being in your head.
These might be thoughts,
The internal monologue most of us experience,
The chorus of a song that you heard recently repeating over and over,
Etc.
If you have a completely silent mind,
Just recite the alphabet silently to yourself.
Does the sound of your imagined voice seem to be appearing inside of something,
Whereas sounds of distant traffic happen outside?
Pay more attention to all the sounds at once,
Including the internal monologue.
Aren't they all simply appearing in the same openness,
That same indefinable space?
Some sounds might be louder than others,
But once again,
Isn't the attribution of distance just another layer of thought that's being imposed upon the sounds?
We assume that vehicle sounds are loud,
So if you hear an engine but it's faint,
Then it must be happening in the distance.
And we think that mosquitoes are very quiet flyers,
So if you hear one,
Then it must be very close to your ear.
But these are assumptions based on memory and labels.
When we hear a sound,
We don't hear an engine or a mosquito,
We simply hear sound vibrations.
The guess of what it is that created the sound and the labels that immediately follow are simply mental additions,
Helpful to navigate daily life,
But also deluding in that they reinforce the sense of separation and individuality.
Right here,
Right now,
Is there any way to find an inside or an outside to your auditory experience?
Would it be more accurate to say that loud sounds and quiet sounds are all happening in this one indefinable,
No place?
Now slowly allow a little light back into your eyes.
Continue opening the eyes gradually,
And then when the sights of objects in the room once again appear,
Do they still seem to be located at a distance apart from something which is observing them?
Can you see that even the most seemingly distant sights are still just appearing here,
In the same space as every sound that can be heard and every physical sensation that can be felt?
Do you still feel a sense of distance or separation from anything and experience?
And has that feeling of being located inside of a separate body,
Like a person inside a suit of armor,
Dissolved?
Does this feeling of interiority make any sense at all anymore?
Just notice how absolutely everything that can be experienced is simply appearing right here,
All together,
And being experienced by no one.
Feel free to remain in this awareness for as long as you would like,
And come back to it often throughout the day.
